Blood and Fire edition.
>FAQs & General Info (Updated November 8th, 2015)
http://pastebin.com/gZ1T9VCN (embed) (embed) (embed)
http://pastebin.com/HK7Qd6if (embed) (embed) (embed)
>/twg/ steam groups (MP battles on weekend, co-op anytime)
TWC Mods -- http://www.twcenter.net/forums/forumdisplay.php?2105-Total-War-Attila-Modifications
Age of Charlemagne DLC -- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNOy63UZXvM&feature=youtu.be
Campaign Gameplay Walkthrough - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJUWImJUZrU
Twelve Days of Festag - http://wiki.totalwar.com/w/Twelve_Days_of_Festag
Attila is an unoptimized mess, try this launcher fix to try and improve performance.
Launch Rome 2 then launch Attila instead from the Total War launcher. FPS can increase anywhere between 1 to 25.
Previous Thread: >>128138673
FIRST FOR I WILL FUCKING KILL MYSELF IF I DON'T GET MY FUCKING FACTIONS
YOUVE BEEN SAYING THAT FOR FUCKING MONTHS YOU NIGGERS
NO I JUST WANT MY FUCKING FACTIONS
THEY FUCKING PROMISED
I have removed romans before
Mildly disappointed with how easy Musulaman conquest of Spain was. Ended up with a triarchy of Cordoba, Zaragoza and Barcelona (maybe whatever 4 is in greek archy since I think there's that south-eastern coastal one) who are all bffs. The other three are buffers with Charlemagne's vassals so I'm left wondering where to go. Either eastward to an apparent Lombard dominion over just about all of Italy or just get military access and march forth to jihad.
I'm actually starting to get a bit hyped to be honest. My usual historicalfag anti-CA cynicism is starting to strain under my desire to summon a flaming tornado. Caesar couldn't do that.
I browse /xcg/ sometimes too but I am not gook.
Is there a way to ram enemy ships - without trying to board them? or perhaps a strategy to "fast click" or cancel a move order or some shit?
This is in context to R2 and Attila (I have no actual had naval battles in ATW yet but I am going to assume not much has changed).
>tfw Gook is dead.
>There are people in /twg/ who browse more than one general.
>There will never be another movie night.
>The memes of production have dried up.
There's a button in the ability bar for ram-capable units that lets you switch between boarding and ramming.
In Attila the only ships that can ram are specialised ramming ships, they have a skeleton crew of like 10 men and are pretty vulnerable to everything.
A pretty crazy change from Rome II.
The meme market is dominated by /pol/ now ever since /tv/ established the doctrine of meme magic.
Buy your memes while you can however because 2016 is shaping up to be a bull of bull markets.
They're all low quality second hand memes though.
I'm hoping with Warhammer and the face animations we get some high quality original stuff, i'm predicting a spike in surprised goblin faces and humans running away from angry skeletons.
Things have changed dramatically. I was absent from /twg/ for over a year. Then Atilla released and a friend convinced me atilla is good and R2 is severely patched and not shit, so I got back and the in depth history discussions about overarm/underarm etc and
friendposting was gone.
>These niggers want me to pay them to not wipe them off the face of the Earth
Part of me wants to raze their capital, but I know I could use it as a launch point for a campaign in the Middle East.
Oh and to the guy who picked on me for siding with Rome, Rome is expanding literally alongside me, we've been assisting eachother. I think things will get more tense once we start pushing into Europa proper instead of cleansing the shitskin lands.
I'm still keeping my eyes on them regardless and have fleet ready to sack Rome withing a moment's notice.
As much as I love the tripfag revolution, which seems to be going on perfectly since it happened, I do miss having a central figure to rally behind like Gook. He made sure to keep discussions focused and always seemed to provide quality content when things went slow.
Still, fuck tripfags though. It'd rather have a good quality thread without them than an excellent quality thread with them.
I felt the tripfags were sometimes more necessary than not. In order to keep the thread alive and the discussion going. Even though one tripfag post got some number of shiposts. Things were different. Maybe it was better, maybe not. My memory is not that reliable. It's a damn shame archive.moe died.
Those little bastards were already trying to incite rebellion in one of my cities near them.
GUESS I'M MARCHING BACK DOWN TO WIPE THEM OUT
>Multiple responses required
>Had to put the captcha in almost ten times
FUCK YOU GOOK
>1.8k for me to not wipe them out
>Look at treasury
Post features/changes you want in TW:
-Hit-and-run stance for cav. Have them charge, and then automatically return to the spot they were at when you issued the charge order.
-Less control over army composition. Hear me out:
In association with a more detailed campaign map experience, your army composition would be decided largely by what buildings and tech you have. You'd have full choice over only a few units per army - the rest would be automatically chosen for you when you hit a "raise levy" button or something.
It'd be hard to get it right, but I'd like to have to work around what the game gives me - Even as a wealthy country, my armies wouldn't just be composed of the most elite units. Germanic Spear Masters would be the elite core of the army, while I'd have to make do with a line of more regular spearmen.
I suppose you could accomplish something similar by just placing limits per army on how many of each type of unit you can recruit, but I would love nothing more than a Total War with a campaign that works like a mix between CKII and Civ, and has you make do with some shitty sub-optimal armies even into the late game.
>charge micro is a good thing
>I just want another boring stomp-the-AI-in-shitty-campaign-maps-with-impossible-to-lose-battles game
My ideas are objectively the best, and I am personally the only hope for the future of Total War. It is to CA's great misfortune that they will not immediately hire me as their new Lead Designer.
Once you are rich, people will ask for coin for the stupidest things.
The AI can tell "this man has 10 million shekels in the bank" so they'll ask you for 1 million shekels to do a thing they would do for free
As far as I know it doesn't fuck your diplomacy in that the AI will only move their ass if you shower them in money, they'll still go do shit like normal but they try and ask for money from time to time, only that they offer you some trivial bullshit as exchange
Hey guys, should I start a war with Baktria, in Rome 2. I basically conquered everyone with the exception of Sparta, Athens and Macedon as allies. Baktria somehow ate up all the lands in the East and has landmass about equal 1/3 of mine. Oh and I'm Rome.
I'm kinda scared as I have to many armies and my treasury can only sustain them a bit longer. And I do really bad in the desert due to my men suffering attrition. Proof is that I went up against Carthage in the African desert and got annihilated by having no men left from the desert trek. Should I launch a full scale invasion on Baktria and hit then hard and fast with my armies then decommission them once I launched the initial offensive?
more ebane memes
>Uhnonymoose declares war on its neighbors leddit, 9gig, and Shitaku as soon as the game starts, getting conquered in 3 turns
>Shitaku starts at war with the rest of the map but gets shitloads of money from being a client of Humble Brokers and their alliance with the NSA
>4chins constantly suffering from civil unrest, rebellions, and fuckery from its vassals /b/, /v/, /a/, /pol/, and /mlp/
>Obama-Rama wages war with everyone it borders except [unnamed organization]
>Baneposter rebellions, Nazi uprisings, and chimpouts sweep specific areas of the map at random
-Your best non-capital city
-17 energy per turn (30 turns)
>you will never tease napoopan about his fetishes ever again
>Playing MP all day
>Eventually can't join a single game without being kicked for being 2stronk
>Even in matchmaking people alt F4 instead of go another round
The best thing just happened in Arena, all of my units died except for my general and he was walking around the base like a sad sack of shit. When enemies passed by him they would kill the other routed teammates and not him.
Dumb AI they should work around. Once you have money factions begin to extort you for things they would otherwise do for free, including bid for peace against an existential threat. It should be the opposite. Once you have that much money, you're powerful enough to just exterminate people rather than deal with bullshit. I'd suggest having no extortion at the opening levels of diplomacy, but have allies begin extorting you for war declarations and further alliances as your money and imperium go up. Or just drop all the extortion stuff because it's annoying and nonsensical.
>LETS TAKE MY ELEPHANTS THROUGH THE ALPS LMAO
>WHOOOPS HALF OF THEM DIED
>BRO YOU WONT BELIEVE THIS LETS VENTURE INTO THIS SWAMP
>WHOOOPS I LOST MY EYE LMAO
>HIHI LETS RUN AROUND ITALY FOR TEN YEARS DOING LITERALLY NOTHING
>DUDE REMEMBER THAT ONE BATTLE LMAO
>HAVING ACHIEVED NOTHING ITS TIME TO GO BACK TO AFRICA I GUESS LOL
>WHOOPS I LOST THE BATTLE
>WHOOPS I LOST EVERYTHING LMAO
> Tomb Kings still not announced
>the AI should ask you for money when you have none
>as soon as you have a lot of money they should stop because MUH REALISM AND FANFICTION HEADCANON
aw yis i love that shit so much
its the fucking best
Seriously, why didn't that faggot push his advantage?
We could all be speaking Canaanite in a Carthaginian Empire that explored the new world before Christ, and never fell because the center of power was safe from barbar shit invasions.
I think you don't understand what's happening.
The AI isn't "extorting" you.
The AI sees you have a lot of money, so the AI asks you to give away some of your wealth.
The AI is compelled to not just ask for free money but to offer you something in return.
The AI will still conduct diplomacy as normal, there is no "Because you are rich I will now only do shit for you if you give me a ten thousand shekels"
Probably not as generals until the next societal collapse loosens the control governments have on militaries and borders can once again be redrawn. Give it at least a century.
As men, politicians and businessmen in the third world will unite their races in ways people could never have imagined, even Tito only did his thing about 75 years ago and he was Napoopy-tier to me.
Maybe he was scared? Maybe he felt like the Romans were luring him in a trap, even after he fucking dominated their armies several times. Unfortunately for him, Scipio didn't seem to share that fear and happily pushed his advantages when he could.
>I don't want to besiege Rome! What if it's all a devious trap by the Romans to have me eliminate their empire, just to die from excitement over actually accomplishing something!
Hannibal was probs an autist that could only process the world in a series of lines moving in lines against other lines. Or straight-up imperialism wasn't part of the Carthaginian spirit and it never occurred to him to just actually destroy Rome and Punicize it rather than metaphorically destroy it by making it subservient to Carthage.
Rome's main advantage was that it could always get more soldiers. Hannibal probably worried that he would march to Rome, only to be met by a force double the size of the force at Cannae, and no way to entrap them.
Or he was just a fucking autist who thought making the Italian cities rebel was a better idea.
How do I into Carthage ?
Playing CAC ,
But it's the same in Vanilla and dei, most of your settlements start off pretty deep in the negative public order. And rome usually declares war withen 5 turns , so by turn 10 your fighting both rome and several rebellions
I'm operating under the theory that Rome was greatly weakened first by having to operate costly defenses along the massive Germanic borders, and then having Italy get overrun.
To take Carthage, the Vandals had to move through Germania, Gaul, Spain, and then cross into Africa. You don't think Rome would have stopped them if Africa was the center of their empire?
Normans took the city for a decade and then got kicked out by locals who couldn't compare to mega-Carthage.
Arabs would be the only big threat, but the Arab empire was only a result of the militarization of the Arab tribes due to the endless Roman-Persian wars that made use of Arabs on both sides.
Maybe something like that would happen with Carthage anyway, or maybe Persia would just have an easier time hitting their capital.
But dammit man, I'm fantasizing, don't ruin my dream.
The fuck did you just say to me you stupid bitch?
Fuckin have that love.
vete a la mierda, hijo de puta ingles
nuestro armada va a violaros esta vez
And you ya silly tart
Also I'm using a mod on the steam workshop called "a
Carthaginian military recipes used to be the most famous and delicious in the world. After the third time he tried their most mild dish and spat it out while crying, spending hours snuggling his Dido hugpillow to soothe himself, Hannibal demanded everyone be forced to eat sweetened grain and milk for the rest of his campaigns. Their reputation never recovered.
>celebrating the slaughter of women
Typical English barbarism.
Sorry that you can't build anything of value yourself, but must you tear down the works of accomplished, civilized peoples?
The Hannibal fan club has to stick together, we're all we got outside mummy and the monthly tugboat. Now all we need is a drawfag to make silly comics of Hannibal doing autistic things.
It was literally self defense. The buildings caught fire as my men were standing outside, women came running out of the buildings and started attacking my brave, noble English Royal Thegns. Bad move.
Also; It's a game you dense cunt.
Any tips on how to launch a successful siege in FOTS? Feels like I can'touch a castle till I unlock arty.
>mfw I send my boys over the top into the castle, and they never return.
I just hit them with overwhelming force and use autoresolve most of the time because I suck dick at it
>First time I do fort assault
>Able to burn down gate and get in
>Every other time I have to climb the walls and get slaughered because I don't have the option to destroy the gate
And that is the story of why I autoresolve sieges.
Only send a single unit to siege, keep the rest of the units nearby to reinforce. The enemy will come out to attack, and then you wipe them out. This is effective until you get cannons, which will make sieges easy mode.
I auto resolve til I get artillery. I decided to do this because it's really tedious. The basic strategy is like so
1: outnumber the enemy
2: divide your forces with one larger than the other, like 70:30
3: hide the smaller force near another gate
4: wait til the enemy is distracted by the main force and then rush in with the smaller one
5: quickly get inside the castle (they will send like one unit to stop you which you can easily brush past)
6a: support your main force by hitting the defenders from behind, breaking their morale and allowing your main force to gain access to the castle easily
7: mop up remaining defenders
Just a basic outline and it's not clean or pretty (at least how I do it, somebody else probably has a really neat way to bait out defenders into a perfect trap but I just want the fucking thing to be over with and early units aren't worth crying over anyway).
>assumes power at the age of 15
>Denmark, Norway, Saxony, Poland-Lithuania and Russia all invade Swedish territory looking for easy grab because of the inexperienced and young king
>Charles kicks them all in to submission
>fights and wins outnumbered 3-1 against Russian army
How to siege in FOTS:
1. Play Tosa.
2. Get a big navy.
3. Get 2 cannons in your army.
4. Turn everything to hamburger before you send in your men to kill the 10 intact soldiers who somehow managed to survive.
Is M2TW ai really this shit?
I'm playing on VH/VH as Portugal and I've already expelled the moors by turn 14
And took Bordeaux which the French sent 2 town militia and peasant archers to try to take, slaughtered them
And why the fuck can't I declare war with a diplomat?
Yeah that's definitely the simplest, and bloodiest, way to do it. But like I said I usually just autoresolve until I get artillery, and even then I only fight battles with artillery because I love watching cannons blow formations to pieces.
Simplest, and unfortunately most efficient way to go about it in early-game. If I do 3 ladders on one wall and 1 on another, I can't get enough flanking bonuses to break through. If I have fewer men on each ladder, I don't have enough bodies to break through. The abundance of arrow towers mean too much maneuvering is death. If it was intentional, I tip my fedora to CA for turning sieges into a meat grinder.
>He thinks Napoleon was white
Racist scum, this isn't 2015 you know.
Fuck it, I'll play some non-Carthage thing first in vanilla to try it out.
Are there any mods which fix the siege shit? Will I ever be able to fucking play rome 2 without AI jet fuel-torches burning down my gates, without them even trying to use siege equipment?
> invades Russia during winter
> loses half the army due to attrition
> gets rekt
Why do they never learn?
So, I was looking for any mod that might fix R2 sieges, and my search led me to an old discussion about gate burning.
Of course there was one brave rebel defending this integral feature, and I knew that the mod advertised in this man's signature must be a true work of genius. 14 new, HISTORICAL, White Hun units, you say? I wonder, how has this man improved upon the ahistorical travesty that is the vanilla White Hun line-up?
Again the Empire building tree because Empire is GOAT!
Fuck vampire cunts, chaos whores, mountain jews and green niggers
its best if you have a whole bunch of abilities for your general that increases the amount of naval bombardments, reduces their cool down time. if you have some kotetsu in your navy you can also get the number of barrages up to 5.
>those baller ass infantry tactics
Gustav would be proud.
The Father of Modern War, Gustavus Adolphus almost certainly was not. But he may very well have been the Father of the Modern World. Because then, at that place, at the moment when the Saxons broke and the Inquisition bade fair to triumph over all of Europe, the king of Sweden stood his ground.
And proved, once again, that the truth of history is always concrete. Abstractions are the stuff of argument, but the concrete is given. Whatever might have been, was not. Not because of tactics, and formations, and artillery, and methods of recruitment—though all of those things played a part, and a big one—but because of a simple truth. At that instant, history pivoted on the soul of one man. His name was Gustavus Adolphus, and there were those among his followers who thought him the only monarch in Europe worthy of the name. They were right, and the man was about to prove it. For one of the few times in human history, royalty was not a lie.
well you just seem to assume there's some relevant reveal today that's worth talking about, didn't know if they had made some announcement about something coming out today or not
How does charge work exactly?
I've read somewhere that when you click the enemy unit - the "charge" activates, lasts a few seconds, then goes on cooldown for unkown period of time. Is that true?
"The Russian heads fell beneath the swords of the Tatars as grass beneath the scythe." -- Novgorodian Chronicles, 1238 a.d.
We miss the Mongols. We need to talk to them.
We go to the steppes, but they don't seem to be home.
We need them, because they were the only nuclear power before the twentieth century. They were not human, as we, after 1945, are not human--much though we try to be, cowards that we are.
The Mongols are our only ancestors. What little we know about them is charged with a terrible and beautiful alienness.
They poured molten silver in the eyes and ears of traitors--a visual joke.
They could be compassionate: when Genghiz Khan captured Jamukha, his closest friend, he did Jamukha the honor of killing him by rolling him up in a carpet and crushing him with boulders, so that the blood would remain in the body.
They had their own sense of righteousness: when the small Slavic town of Kozelsk, near Kaluga, resisted them for months, they dubbed it "the wicked town." So upset were they with the scandalous behavior of Kozelsk that they not only killed all the inhabitants (which went without saying), but drowned the child-prince, Vladimir, in human blood. That'll teach'em to be wicked!
Only water could stop them. Only two of their campaigns failed: the attacks on Java and Japan. The Mongols were inland creatures--centaurs, four-legged archers; they had to rely on mere humans to transport them across the sea. Like witches, they lost something of their power when crossing water. The Japanese were saved twice: once by a lucky typhoon, the kamikaze or holy wind invoked by suicide bombers in the last stages of WW II, and once by the confusion among the Mongols as they tried to disembark: the Samurai attacked and destroyed the invaders before they could mount their ponies.
Once on the pony, bow in play, the Mongols were invulnerable; they danced just at the edge of bow-range, dispatching humans until it was time to go among the dead and collect one's arrows, burn the villages and move on to the next days work of planet-cleansing.
When the Russians first encountered the Mongols, it happened the way the Tasmanian Devil appears in a Looney Toons cartoon: first all the animals in the forest come rushing past, fleeing together, lion and rabbit and squirrel no longer afraid of each other, sharing the far greater terror of what's behind them. Then the Devil himself appears.
It was their old enemies the Polovtsi, who warned the thirteenth-century Russian princes of the Mongols. The Polovtsi came to beg the Russians' help against this new terror from the East. The Polovtsi explained things simply: "They have taken our country; tomorrow they will take yours." The Southern Russian princes, for once, behaved sensibly--at first. They acknowledged their common peril and formed an alliance among themselves and with the hated Polovtsi against the Mongols.
The Mongols appeared, quiet and uncanny, to make the Russians another offer. Their ambassadors said "We have come against our slaves and grooms, the accursed Polovtsi. [The Mongols always thought in horsey terms. "slave" equals "groom."] We have no quarrel with you; be at peace with us." Rarely did the Mongols give anyone a chance like that. And, just like the last of the reckless Russian princes, Nicholas II when the Germans warned him not to destroy his people on behalf of the French, the Russian princes chose not to listen. A foolhardy chivalry ruled them from the moment they took the non-career-enhancing step of murdering the Mongol envoys.
But they still could have won, if they hadn't been ruled by the same suicidal chivalrous recklessness. For once, all the princes of Southern Russia were united. They made a huge and formidable army, which advanced into the steppes in 1224 to find the Tatar horde. Encountering the Mongols on the Kalka, near the sea of Azov, the princes' cavalry charged without even informing the Kievans who made the bulk of the army. They were destroyed; then the Mongols went about methodically destroying the disorganized Kievan forces. At least 10,000 Kievans died, and the Southern Russian forces were broken. The surviving princelings reverted to form, making private deals with the Mongols--but the Mongols, faced with such "wickedness," were not in a generous mood any longer. Mstislaf, Prince of Kiev, was holed up in a fortified camp on the Kalka. The Mongols offered him his, his sons' and his retainers' lives if they surrendered. They did; the Mongols massacred the garrison and then crushed the Prince and his two sons-in-law under planks. In the Slavic view, this was a refinement of cruel treachery; but the Mongols thought in their own, very alien and idiosyncratic ways. To them, this might have been an honorable death, which kept the blood in the body--and to them, the blood was the life.
The Southern Russian princes had come close to organized resistance; the Northern princes, terrified, could not unite and were wiped out one by one. After a ten-year quiet which was almost as terrifying as the first onslaught (the Mongols had gone home to attend the coronation of Ogodai as Genghiz's successor), they returned, annihilating the Bulgars, another former enemy of Russia, then turned on the Northern princes.
The next century was smoke, blood, disaster. The only stories the Russians could use to console themselves were of the sort conquered people always tell: grand defiance, magnificent gestures which have no hope of altering the fact of defeat. The Princes of Ryazan, marching out to meet certain death, were offered a deal by the Mongols: "If you want peace, give us a tenth of your wealth." The folk tales have the princes saying in grand disdain, "When we are dead, you may have the whole." The Mongols' reply, not recorded, would have been something on the order of, "OK; thanks!"
When Fyodor of Ryazan had died in due course, his wife, Euphrasia, followed the practice of virtuous wives, choosing to leap from the terem (harem) rather than face the fate worse than death. There's no proof she did so; these stories are the only way the defeated humans could go on living under alien rule.
The Russians gleaned from the great disaster only the bitter consolation prizes of defeated peoples, above all the right to explain what went wrong, whatever went wrong, as legacy of "the Mongol yoke." It's easy for Westerners to mock this sort of grand version of "I had a bad childhood," but it's even harder to imagine Voltaire and Hume springing up on soil that had felt the Mongol ponies' hooves. They were good enough reason to explain many things, above all disappearances and vanishings..
The Mongols specialized in vanishing and making vanish. They didn't build cities, they erased them. Karakorum, the Mongols' one attempt to build a capital city, is a rectangle of mud walls now. The Mongols' greatest memorials are negative: huge blank spots on the map. Eastern Iran, once a populous, irrigated land, is a blank now, courtesy of the Mongol cleaners. They erased the cities and, far more devastatingly, the irrigation systems. Humans breed like cockroaches, and will always repopulate plundered cities--but if you smash their water supply, they can't come back.
But the one quality which sets them apart from every other tribe is their utter, superhuman immunity to the God-virus. The Mongol attitude to religion was wholly alien. They found the religions of the conquered humans handy, to keep the livestock under control, but could see no difference between the various superstitions and were equally sardonic about all of them. They cared no more about the beliefs of their subjects than a farmer cares what his dairy cattle think about reincarnation. It's true that Genghiz disliked Muslims perhaps more than subjects of other cults, but only because the Khan's armies encountered more opposition from the Muslims, while the Christians, far weaker in Central Asia, were mostly preachers--entertainers on dull nights after a day of erasing villages.
No human tribe has ever managed to keep from catching the God virus-but then, the Mongols were not human. All the survivors agreed on that. An Armenian priest describes them:
"They were terrible to look at and indescribable, with large heads like a Buffalo, narrow eyes like a baby bird, a snub nose like a cat, big snouts like a dog, narrow waists like an ant, and short legs like a hog. They are as strong as lions but as shrill-voiced as hawks....They bear huge litters like snakes and eat like wolves. Death does not appear among them, for they live 300 years. They do not eat bread at all."
A science-fiction writer wisely said, "The thing about aliens is--they're ALIEN." You can't understand them. You never will. That's true of the Mongols: they were so unlike the people who "eat bread" that chroniclers can only describe them by resorting to a whole zoo of analogies, like the Armenian does: they were like ants, lions, snakes, birds, dogs...everything but human. The Mongols referred to themselves as a "swarm of birds"; they flew, while the humans trudged. The humans said the same: "The Mongols appear where least expected," coming and going like a wry, lethal God.
The Khans claimed to be the descendants of a she-wolf. They tinkered with humans; they played. When Ogotai, son of Genghiz Khan, captured North China, his lieutenants suggested that the human population be erased, because all these walls--the houses and palaces and cities which were no more to the Mongols than termite mounds--spoiled what could have been good pasture. The Khan considered it, but decided as a matter of policy that those bipeds could be useful. And it would have been a lot of work to erase them, because there were at least twenty million people in North China. He let them live. That's why China is not pasture today.
In Iran, the Mongols chose to erase the human population: that's why much of Iran is desert today.
And that's why we need to talk to the Khans now: because they are the only people before the invention of nuclear weapons to have treated the world as a garden to be pruned as they chose. We need to compare notes with Genghiz and Kublai Khan, with Subotai and Ogodai. But it's difficult, because the Mongols are coming into fashion and becoming extinct.
The two processes are linked: extinction first, then fashionability.
The missionaries are in charge of the actual extinction. As the eXile's inimitable War Nerd recently pointed out, the missionaries are the military wing of Christianity, the real stormtroubadors. They are busily infecting the Mongols now. Mongolia is converting to Christianity faster than any other country in the world. Some reports say the whole population will be Christian in ten years. Plump white folks from Nebraska and Texas are fanning out over the steppes in expensive new Toyota Landcruisers, visiting the most remote herders' tents to breathe the God-virus on them. And these Mongols, the shy remnant, lack the Khans' immunity to the God-virus; they're succumbing to it instantly.
For the herders, the switch from Buddha and the shamans to Jesus is simple: Jesus brings stuff every time his followers come by, while Buddha never brought anything. The old Buddhist monks just sat in their lamaseries, chanting; the Christian missionaries, these inexplicable white people in vehicles worth more than most Mongolian towns, drop off blankets and pots every time they come by. And the shamans' drums don't work as well as the drugs the plump visitors bring.
So the Mongols are finished. Already they've descended to human; soon they'll be churchgoing stooges--less than human. Ten years from now they'll all be in cheap suits, singing Come to Jesus in the key of C and studying accounting at Oral Roberts U.. Then the Khans will really be gone.
The most grotesque aspect of the whole thing is that Hollywood is going Buddhist/shamanistic as quickly as the Gobi is going Christian, so that in a decade the Dalai Lama may build a new, Lhasa-style palace overlooking the HOLLYWOOD sign while Pat Robertson powers his wheelchair up the ramp of a brand-new Jesusarium & Bible College built on the ruins of Genghiz's capital.
Somehow, though, it's not a fair exchange. Hollywood Mongols just wouldn't be very good. Hollywood has never done the Mongols very well. John Wayne actually played Genghiz in a movie called The Conqueror, but I've heard it was one of the worst movies ever. Didn't see it myself; I don't go in for camp, especially about serious matters.
But it's foolish, I guess, whining about the extinction of the Mongols, when all the warrior peoples are being phased out, along with the big cats and other remaining predators. In the cubicle world, no predators are allowed--not without ties'n'smiles. Dress code.
But don't worry, we'll mourn'em as we kill them off. Just like the Brits mourned the Highlanders, once they were wiped out. Just like the Americans mourned the Sioux once they were erased. Just as, when the last wolf in the lower 48 was shot, wolf posters started appearing in every sensitive kid's bedroom. The wolf-cult is big now; CDs of wolf-howls sell almost as big as humpback whale songs, and there's a whole subgenre of New Age music in which wolf howls are tracked over bad jazz, for meditation soundtracks. We love 'em, once they're gone.
That's why the camera crews are fanning out across the steppes right now, along with the missionaries. The missionaries are the kill-teams; the moviemakers are there to make videos of the death, like the ones perky office-workers with colon cancer make of their last weeks on Earth, the kind shown at those new-style cheery funerals so popular these days.
Julia Roberts just did a documentary about her stay with a family of Mongol herders, who were presented as friendly, kindly, and a bit dim. Nothing to fear, or interest, any one.
The Russians go a little further, of course, toward the thing we really like about Mongols: so, in the quasi-Russian film Urga, a poor Mongol herder dreams he meets Genghiz Khan, the "Oceanic Ruler," himself. The modern Mongol comes face to face with the Khan's entourage, and is ashamed to be seen as he is: unarmed, harmless, ripe for infection with the Christian virus.
The modern Mongol, dim and affable--nobody except the missionaries really wants THAT Mongol. What the rest of us dream of is the Khan's horde: the black arrow that swept across Eurasia like a hundred-mile wide cropduster, leaving utter silence in its wake. Every boy who came on the Mongols in the "M" volume of the encyclopedia slobbered over those black arrows on the map, placed the flat of his hand over them and moved it forward following the path of the Horde, making little hissing noises as he imagined the progress of Death incarnate.
For centuries the wilder Europeans have been making the black pilgrimage to Central Asia, trying to find THOSE Mongols. They never find anything but the shy, polite herders--Julia Roberts' gracious hosts.
Last year I saw a five-hour documentary by some German woman who followed a group of yak-herders around the steppes. The Mongols were very quiet: the only sound for most of the five hours was the yak-bells clanging. The herders smiled embarrassedly, aware that they were somehow unsatisfactory. There was a festival with wrestling, and long shots of people crunching in frozen mud--but the Mongols we all want to see were not in evidence.
And they're not to be found. The Western Khanates were absorbed by the Islam they had done so much to destroy, and subsided into feebleness, so that their Russian vassals began pushing south and east, taking back what had been lost and more. The herders, and their decadent little rulers, were all there was to be found. No one to hold to account; no one who even remembered the days before these beings who had been something more, less, other than human became mere people.
Early game for Empire is gonna be hard as fuck going on those tier 1 units.
That image hit me right in the feels. I used to post a Dutch Empire Darth campaign and I just remember posting a picture of diplomacy with Spain. I was kicking their ass on the wild coast and Panama at the time.
Carlos II's big stupid inbred face with terrifying as Spain's power status. Someone edited it together - beautiful.
Now my rig is broken, no money to fix it because I'm doing an MA in Early Modern History. I miss being a part of it ;_;
Given that the full image of the building chains appears to be of Altdorf with all the surrounding regions still help by other factions I think maybe you might start with a Tier 3 barracks.
Coming from the tabletop Empire couldn't hope to win a game with swordsmen/spearmen, pistoliers, mortars, warrior priests and a wizard. Infantry literally melts without range support, mortar can't touch monstrous creatures and without heavy cav there's no hammer to support infantry.
Congrats on getting into postgrad anon, I'm doing a phd on WW1 as well actually. Have far too little time to play TW but i still have /twg/ open in another tab no matter what else I'm doing.
And after spending some time in other generals, /twg/ is still actually a lot friendlier and more helpful than every other general I've seen.
You too anon, just applied to do a PhD. Hope it's going well for you anon and all the best.
Same I just open it when I've got a bit of down time though. I'm between semesters at the minute.
I long for a seventeenth century TW, Warhammer's The Empire looks to be the closest I'll get.
Thanks, all the best for you too.
I'm a pike and shotter too anon. Been reading up on the English civil war to decompress from WW1 stuff and it just makes me want a TW set in that era so bad. It'd be too perfect. But yeah, I'll be playing Warhammer as the Empire for the same reason.
>Always nice to witness someone suddenly realise how retarded they are.
So sorry that Steam decided to fuck up and I had to restart to fix it. Really shows just how retarded I am.
>psEASYIGSN FAORS GAMES
>try launcher trick
>works for months with zero issue
>try again eventually
>no game process in task manager
>steam shows me playing nothing
>assume it doesn't work the same anymore
>try restarting Steam ten seconds later
>"YOU ARE LTIERALLY RETARDED HAHA"
Its just a guess though CA didn't confirm mortars either so they aren't ruled out. Besides captain its pretty hard to distinguish what the two other units could be.
It's just a process of elimination, you look at what's there and what's missing and make an intelligent guess based on what's in the image.
>1. Swordsmen and spearmen.
>2. Crossbows, Spearmen w. Shields and Halberds.
>3. Captain, Greatswords and handgunners.
In the first tier, you can see a clear swordsman, and next to him a similarly armoured guy thrusting forward = spearman.
Second tier shows a clear halberd and crossbow, plus a man holding a spear even more armoured than before In a shielded stance.
Third tier shows the eyepatch man as the captain, plus a man on the far left with a funny hat about to swing with his greatsword, then in the middle you have a man clearly holding a rifle.
'fraid not thats a greatsword in tier 2 its clearly a hilted zwei being held and it appears to be a zwei in the rightmost tier 3 card. Still you're right about handgunners and crossbowmen coming earlier than tier 3 but its hard to fit them in earlier.
I can't see how anything in tier 2 can even remotely be seen as a zweihander.
On the left is a clear halberd blade, in the middle is a clear polearm + the hat/stance is all wrong for a greatswordsmen, and on the right is a clear crossbowman.
Trying out Huns for the first time after playing pretty much everytihng non-horde, and I'm getting trashed in battles on very hard. What should be the general army composition for them? I think I overdid it with horse archers and cavalry in general and in large numbers they are very hard to control, can't help them spazzing out and doing the opposite I want them to do in big battles with 2 or more stacks involved.
All out horsefuckery with horse archers
And some cheap melee cav for clean up duty
Started a new AoC campaign as Lombardy and 20 turns later noticed a really weird bug.
I have 0 household items and retainers.
It's obviously one of the mods I have but wich one can it possibly be?
The ones I had for ages and 99% not the ones that caused this:
Campaign AI Tweaks
Agrez Unit Reskin
The ones I got recently:
Dont Lie to me Game
Age of Britania
The kebab is almost removed from Europa.
Sometimes I imagine that someone follows my progress and cares
Sometimes I imagine that someone follows my progress and cares I don't :^)
So I picked up R2 and Attilla during the winter sale after avoiding them like the plague and have been having a blast in Attilla. Does R2 hold up in comparison to Attilla, or is it still FUNdamentally fucked?
I think that DeI has a really good Campaign Map. However, the Battles are worse than vanilla R2. Infantry grind each other so slowly that the only way to win battles is hammer and anvil. Radious is complete shit.
There have been numerous undisputable masterpieces in total war modding, such as the strikingly realistic classic Europa Barbarorum or its medieval counterpart Stainless Steel. Radious mod will not join their ranks; its surface is too generic, its presentation too provocative and its messages too obscure. Its take on the abysmal is an illumination in one person’s despair, but a paroxysm of another’s perversion. It will remain underground – treasured by the most avant-garde among intellectuals for its edifying if horrifying insight into the fundaments of human morality. Philistines and self-proclaimed critics alike will shun Radious mod, but you can’t fault them for that. It takes wisdom to appreciate its subtleties, and courage to side with the unpopular opinion. Sed domi maneas paresque nobis novem continuas fututiones.
Superficially, Radious mod appears to be a mod which caters to the most proletarian among men; aloof critics dismiss it as such often without a second thought. As complacent as these self-proclaimed "understanders of strategy" are, they fail to realize that Radious mod is a cult classic, a chef d'oeuvrea buried under false preconceptions and unfounded criticism. This gem is hidden because it does not shine; it is buried because its tone is that of abyssal black. Radious mod pries into to the darkest corners of our subconscious, the most visceral of our cognition, the most carnal of our urges, and the most primal of our instincts.
As brilliantly put by Cattalus, "Pedicabo ego vos et irrumabo"; to describe the artistic qualia of Radious mod would be to describe music to the deaf, color to the blind or beauty to the philistine. The painting speaks for itself, and it is up to the player to fully absorb its depth. Its sublimity will ever be debated yet always remain objectively irrefutable; the fundamental insight it provides into human and perhaps animalistic nature may shape the basis of Total War modding for centuries to come.
Can't wait to slay some beastmen
after paying for the 2 DLC
>implying I will not burn Athel Loren while praying the true gods and spreading my feces on the wall after my bretonnian campaign
>Empire - All Human settlements / Any province not an underground mountain hold or uninhabited wasteland.
>Dwarves - Only mountain settlements , reflects reclamation over conquest for the Dwarves.
>Greenskins - All settlements, WAAAAAAAAGHHHHHH
>Vampires - Either like the Empire or Orks.
>Chaos - Nowhere, razing.
I don't see the problem here, all the options are lore appropriate and also fairly practical, you wouldn't have dwarves forming an overground Empire, or the Empire trying to settle underground fortresses or uninhabitable wastelands. It would be weird to represent the badlands or mountains as just another generic land.
There is no "nemesis system", and there never was, the whole concept was invented as an exaggeration of a fairly tame concept just to drum up outrage. The whole restricted occupation is just an attempt to make each race and terrain unique by providing different options for conquest. Why should invading the Badlands be the exact same gameplay wise as invading Bretonnia? It's repetitive, and one of the main things that kill the late game total war.
Anyway, it would take 10 seconds in the databases to give all races occupy options for all settlements anyway, so who cares.
>not giving yourself over to chaos and buying into CAs DLC business practices.
Literally not accurate, you are stupid
Each expansion, there are two of them planned right now, will be stand alone.
But if you have all of them installed, the main campaign map will be expanded by each of the two expansions.
It's the Total War: Warhammer Trilogy mate, not Total War: Warhammer and it's two expansions. They're going to be entirely new games with the same development time as the first game.
Like Attila to Rome II, straight from the horses mouth.
stop pretending to be retarded, they are literally referring to them as "expansions" everywhere
forgot pic because im fucking pissed
Ok my friend, i'm going to bullet point out the facts for you.
1. Total War: Warhammer is the first game in a 'trilogy' (As CA has referred it has multiple times) of games that are being made "Like Attila to Rome II", with the full 2 year development cycle of a standalone Total War game. Alongside this, each game in the trilogy will also have a complete DLC cycle, like every other Total War game.
2. Each of these "sequels"(As CA has referred to them multiple times), while completely Independent of each other as standalone and fully functioning Total War titles, have the ability to lock together as expansions to the first game in the trilogy, allowing a single larger Total War: Warhammer.
I hope we've cleared up any misinformation between us, and I hope you one day stop being so angry, because that's unhealthy and I care about you.
ALSO WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS MAYMAY BULLSHIT FUCK YOU CA
I've pulled shit like this off in Shogun 2 but it hasn't seemed to work like that in Rome 2 and since this is essentially Rome 2 with a bigger map and shittier UI I'm guessing it'll go the same way.
Lol no, Romans have Testudo. Place your units at the tops of entrances to your town square and pop testudo. You need to kill their general and then their entire army will start to rout.
Dogbert challenged Darren to a duel for control of all streams. Dogbert initially called for pistols, but Darren thought that was ableist against people without fingers. They agreed to beat each other to death with rocks
Verb. (START TO HAPPEN)
To start to happen or exist: What time does the concert begin? The bridge was begun five years ago and the estimated cost has already doubled. The film they want to watch begins at seven. The meeting began promisingly, but then things started to go wrong.
The plane began to make its final descent into the airport.
To use physical force to try to defeat another person or group of people: There were children fighting in the playground. The soldiers fought from house to house. They fought with (= on the side of) the North against the South. The birds were fighting over (= competing for) a scrap of food. They fight like cats and dogs (= fight or argue very angrily and violently). They fought to the bitter end/to the death (= until everyone on one side was dead or completely defeated).B2 [I or T] to use a lot of effort to defeat or achieve something, or to stop something happening: He fought the disease bravely for three years. We need the public's help in fighting crime. He fought against racism. Vitamin C is thought to help fight colds and flu. They had to fight hard for improvements to the road system. One of the passengers was fighting for her life (= so ill or injured that she might die) last night after receiving multiple injuries in the collision. With debts of over $2 million, the corporation is fighting for its life (= people are trying hard to stop it being destroyed) I had to fight (back) (= tried hard not to show or produce) the tears when he said he was leaving. The bank fought off (= successfully prevented) a takeover by another bank recently. I was getting a cold at the start of the week but I seem to have fought it off (= got rid of it).B2 [I] informal to argue: I wish they wouldn't fight in front of the kids. I could hear them fighting about money again.
Is there any footage?
What about the dots?
And can we really equate true meaning and intention with definitions?
After all the dictionary is descriptive and not prescriptive
words can't describe how mad I am
>general with me since the start
>most loyal guy I have
>randomly abandons me and takes 4 cannons with him + several start of campaign veterans
>dies a pointless death later on trying to take Kyoto from me
>Getting fucked as Visigoths because it decides I'm selecting my first line of defense and sending them to attack the Hun cavalry heading for my archers
>I was telling my archers to equip melee and get ready for the buttfucking
Yup, gonna go play WT or Rome 2.
Anon I had just set my archers to melee and right clicked the cavalry incoming. Then my first line spearmen and swordsmen come running from their engagement 200m away. Either way I'd rather play something other than Attila.
On the upside
>catch Aizu transporting an entire army with a single ship
>all those shogitai swimming with the fishes
He's just been sitting here for the whole game
Is he depressed lads?
I've grown rather fond of the Japanese ironclad, kotetsu. Its firepower is pretty bad, but it just refuses to get hurt by anything and having cannons on the front is really nice when you are attacking. it needs support, but I find it very useful for baiting the AI to come to me since it has 1000 range while other ships only have 750
I'm doing a legendary campaign right now. The hardest is stabilising and keeping the sea clear so your trade doesn't get raped constantly and your shit gets bombarded
I can't wait that long, my feet will get cold.
Revolutionary troops in napoleon looks great.
The mods are very much awake right now
These men don't need no shoes because they're tough as nails. Ever felt cold because you had no wool socks to wear? Not this man. He doesn't give a shit. He can march across the alps and stroll over to Moscow only to find that the russians burned it down to warm their little fingers.
>tfw discussion is dead unless warhammer news are posted
fantasyfags will save the general
is there anyone who worked on EB2?
How the fuck do you capture this region?
>110% public order
>It drops down to 60-70%
>Unrest rises from 40 to 60%
>Combined with civil unrest it goes to -100%
>On top of distance from capital -5%
I tried everything i even massacred them a couple of times
Im about to quit
I want Rey to become the villain so that one of the two good new characters in the movies can get rid of her ass.
More likely that Luke will die, she will become the best Jedi ever, and lead the new Jedi order.
Best at piloting the Millennium Falcon and repairing it, despite it being the first time she was on it. Also despite not being a Jedi, is able to instantly use Jedi mind tricks. I won't say anything about her victory over Kylo, because he was already weakened by everything else before that fight. I will also add in a note of amusment at how utterly pointless Captain Phasma was as a character.
So, what IS the best mod for Rome 2? I've tried Radious and I didn't like it at all, DeI seemed like a confused mess with terrible battles (also noticeably impacted my framerate). Any recommendations?
Having played both DEI and Radious extensively for R2 I can safely say netiher are ideal for their own reasons.
Unfortunately I also think that boils down to the game itself not being that great. If you don't like vanilla you're unlikely to enjoy the game even if you find a mod for it.
The Faster Battles submod decreases Unit health and increases hit chance, so Units kill each other quicker. There's another one that makes units move faster on the battlefield, and there might be another one that affects morale.
Ancient Empires is WIP but adds things like the Augustus Campaign map to the Grand Campaign, and other changes.
I want to play total war but I'm not sure which one.
I own shogun 2 with ROTS and FOTS, rome 1 and 2, and atilla. And I pirated the charlemange atilla.
And I might have Napoleon somewhere
>another day went by
>still no news
i want to die
>play Xenoblade Chronicles
>sassykids didn't surrender even after i razed more than half of their provinces
Haven't posted in a while, but I'm back to TW after a big hiatus.
We're Asturias, waging a simultaneous war against mega-Lombardy and Sicily. Charlie is getting his shit wrecked, and only rises ahead of the Lombards when I wipe a guido stack. For my own part, I'm handicapping myself by leaving Cordoba alive as a vassal, and protecting the neighboring towns with large-ish garrison armies.
The Lombard war in Gaul is a bloody slog near Narbona - my one stack meets them near the river, wrecks their shit, but take too many casualties to push the advantage. I almost lost my heir in a river battle, when they took out half my army with their fucking archers. After that, I learned I can't really hold chokepoints against them as Asturias.
The Sicilian war goes a lot better - the western islands have fallen, and they went from being the no. 1 faction to no. 6 or 7 after I killed 4 stacks of reinforcements with my navy. I'm about to expunge the last Greeks from the island, and then move into Sicily proper.
I'm going for maximal Visigothic + Spanish Empire borders.
>We agree it'll probably be Slavs,
says whom? Armenians actually had an established history at the time of Attila, it would complement the lonely Sassies in the Eastern Empires, like the Slavs are literally just Sclavenii, pretty boring shit, they'd have to be a horde to be interesting. Don't get me wrong, I'm a Slav + Slavaboo, but obviously Armenia should get it.
>not using natural water mod
I'm not going to turn this into some passive-aggressive shitposting duel. We WANT Armenia because it has the potential to be a decent faction and is historically relevant. We DON'T want Slavs because they are irrelevant and backwards at this point in time, but we acknowledge they will probably make it because of nationalists whining to CA. You being a Slav
they always have to mention ithas nothing to do with Sclaveni getting in.
>post claims "we" think Slavs will be included, but "hopes" the Armenians will be
>post questioning why the anon thinks Slavs would be more likely than Armenians to be included
>rude non-sensical post about 2nd anon not being able to read
>retort in kind
>then this. Whatever this is.
I don't care about the graphics, they've always looked fine to me.
They're in an encampment, have parity in numbers, and superiority in missiles.
This is gonna be bloody.
We're going to expend all our ammo whittling them down before we charge. Their front guard takes a heavy hit from our onagers.
Just garrison towns with the cheapest, shitty levy units. They will almost always cost less than the extra money you can make from another building or a higher tax rate.
Forgot my pic, and forgot to take more during the battle.
Ended as one would predict though, a total rout for the enemy. Pretty sure the commander was the Doux, actually, so Sicily has a new leader.
Does anyone still play the Hyrule mod for M2?
Love how fucking ridiculous the new loading screens are.
Seriously, what the fuck is this shit?
Should I buy Empire?
I loved FotS (But it gets stale after a while)
I've seen gameplay of Empire and it looks pretty clunky, but I like the size of the map.
How's the progression?
Any historically accurate mods on the scale of DeI or is it all just fucking radious and darthmod?
Just go to the dev's youtube channel.
I guess his level 30 skill will be exactly that
since the Purple Sun of Xereus is also in
Damn, even-sided naval battles can be fucking brutal.
Even though I took out 1/3 of their ships with artillery, I still lost 7/10 of my own melee ships from hand-to-hand fighting.
>6 different fleets bombarding me in FOTS right now
>-1500 a turn