ATTENTION MAGGOT, I WANT YOU TO REVIEW THE LAST GAME YOU PLAYED IN A CONCISE BUT WELL THOUGHT OUT MANNER AND TELL ME IF I SHOULD PLAY IT. REFUSAL WILL RESULT IN MY FOOT GOING SO FAR UP YOUR ASS YOU'LL TASTE LEATHER. DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?
Image sums it up.
magic: 2015- A game that adds features like a more customizable deck, while taking away even more from the previous game, no longer having double headed giant (2 vs 2) and limiting allowed decks (no sliver deck). The game sets you up for failure if you purchase the bare-bones version of the game, starting you with a weak deck that will leave you losing matches often regardless of skill, simply because your opponents will outgun you 95% of the time. It's no doubt a method to try and force you into buying the 'complete edition' which gives you a much larger amount of cards to work with, although even though it says it's a complete pack, you'll still be missing quite a lot of cards.
The UI has a neat look to it, but the game's menu is counter intuitive and slow paced. It feels like navigating through the menu options take forever.
Over all I'd give it a 6/10
(((...i played it at 4am kangaroo time so no servers <100ms had fucking anyone
spent 30 minutes fighting the AI...)))
(((...great game, wouldn't recommend, don't play it, it's good...)))
Europa Universalis 4. Complex, the tutorials don't teach you basically anything that you can't learn by fiddling around, forcing you to read the wiki or watch videos on how to play it. Also some descriptions are so misleading it's silly. Too much RNG bullshit, not on FTL levels but we're getting there.
WELL I'M PLAYING THE ZODIAC JOB SYSTEM VERSION AND ITS PRETTY NICE, REALLY. YOU ALSO GET THE ONLY PARTY MEMBER THAT MATTERS PRETTY EARLY IN THE GAME, SO THAT'S COOL. I MADE PENELO MY UHLAN BUT THEN THEY TOOK HER AWAY FROM ME, SO I DON'T GET MY SICK DRAGOON CHICK UNTIL LATER. FAR SUPERIOR COMBAT SYSTEM COMPARED TO OLDER GAMES, CAN EVEN HOLD THE ATTENTION OF SMALL CHILDREN.
I GIVE IT A 9/10, WHY IS VAAN EVEN A THING?
FUNMETROIDVANIA GAME WITH GOOD ACTION, PLATFORMING, AND ENJOYABLE BOSSES. EXPLORATION IS VERY WELL REWARDED AND BACKTRACKING ISN'T TOO BAD SINCE YOU HAVE TO GO BACK TO OLD AREAS ANYWAYS WITH "FAST TRAVEL". ONLY REAL ISSUES ARE THE OCCASIONAL GLITCH AND VERY RARELY PARTS OF THE ENVIROMENT TAKE A WHILE TO LOAD.
KID ICARUS UPRISING WAS THE LAST GAME I PLAYED SIR
I DIDN'T LIKE IT AT ALL ON MY FIRST PLAYTHROUGH BUT IT GETS BETTER THE MORE YOU PLAY ON HIGHER DIFFICULTIES. I STILL THINK THE ON LAND PARTS ARE THE WORST PARTS OF THE GAME
SIR AGE OF WONDERS 3 IS A GOOD STRATEGIC/TACTICAL EXPERIENCE WHICH IS EASY TO PICK UP AND LEARN, HOWEVER IT REQUIRES MANY MANHOURS OF PLAY FOR A SINGLE MATCH AND THE SKILL CEILING MAY BE TOO LOW FOR GRAND STRATEGY AFFICIONADOS SEEKING MORE COMPLEX STRATEGIC GAMEPLAY
I WOULD RECOMMEND IT DUE TO ONGOING BALANCE UPDATES AND ITS CURRENT AFFORDABLE PRICE
SIR, IT'S A DECENT GAME, SIR. IT USES THE GAMEPAD WELL AND HAS A GOOD FRAMEWORK FOR A SLOWER-PACED SURVIVAL HORROR. THE EXECUTION IS BLAND AND IT HAS SEVERAL MECHANICAL PROBLEMS, BUT OVERALL I ENJOYED IT.
7/10, SIR. IT'S ALRIGHT.
WARGAME: RED DRAGON
COLD WAR GONE HOT ALTERNATE HISTORY RTS WITH AN EMPHASIS ON HISTORICAL ACCURACY
YOU CAN PLAY AS AN ASSLOAD OF DIFFERENT NATIONS IN MATCHES FROM 1V1 TO 10V10
IT'S PRETTY FUN WITH FRIENDS AND IS DUE TO RECEIVE A FAIRLY ENORMOUS UPDATE THAT REBALANCES A LOT OF THE BULLSHIT ASPECTS AND ADDS NEW UNITS TO POLAND, CZECHOSLOVAKIA AND EAST GERMANY
This game is so good and yet so bad. It's premise is amazing and it's visuals are just mindblowing sometimes (especially if you're high, like I always am).
But then, I guess like halfway through making the game, they decided for it to be an... RT...S.... game..? Yeah, and that wouldn't be bad if it worked well, but it really doesn't, honestly. At all. The mechanics just aren't polished.
I still love this game. 3/5 is a fair rating.
+: Tight Controls, Excellent Customization, Interesting Tracks, Robust Multiplayer Options
-: Terrible Loading Times, Lack of Continued Support, Cluttered Menus
8/10, a sequel on the PS4 could be the best karting game yet if done right.
KILLING FLOOR, SIR
FUN WITH FRIENDS OR STRANGERS ASLONG AS THEY AREN'T ASSHATS. THE GAME HAS A LOT MORE STRATEGY THAN IT FIRST SEEMS CONSIDERING IT'S A SURVIVAL HORROR WAVE BASED FPS
OVERALL IT'S A BIT OF A GRIND BUT A GAME WITH PLENTY OF FUN INVOLVED
FILTHY MAGGOTS WILL COMPLAIN ABOUT COSMETIC DLC AND DLC THAT CHANGES FUCK ALL AND THEY'RE WRONG EVERYTIME, SIR
THE VERY FIRST DIABLO, SIR, MY WELL THOUGHT OUT AND CONCISE REVIEW IS PLAY IT YOU FAGGOT
POKEMON Y, SIR!
IT FEELS LIKE THE LEAP FROM GEN2 TO GEN3, AND MAKES ME FEEL LIKE A JOLLY KID AGAIN, SIR!
I ALSO LIKE TO PLAY DRESS-UP WITH THE FEMALE TRAINER AND LOOK AT FEMALE NPC'S WITH LUSTFUL EYES!
Dead Space 3 was pretty fun. It felt like a good movie. And while a lot of things were different from the 2nd one for the worse, a lot of things felt better too. I didnt have a coop partner this playthrough, but I might pick it up again once my friend gets to that one. I actually really liked it and felt like it was a nice way to end the series. I recommend it as long as you play all three.
SIR, MONSTER HUNTER 3 ULTIMATE SIR! IT'S AN ACTION GAME WITH A SLOW BEGINNING FOLLOWED BY A SUDDEN DIFFICULTY SPIKE, REACTION TO WHICH WILL DETERMINE WHETHER OR NOT YOU DROP THE GAME RIGHT THEN AND THERE OR SPEND SEVERAL HUNDRED MORE HOURS WITH IT SIR! I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT SIR, BUT IF TIME OR MONEY IS A FACTOR YOU MAY WISH TO WAIT FOR THE NEXT INSTALLMENT EARLY NEXT YEAR SIR!
PROJECT M: TURBO MODE ALLOWS FOR SUCCESSFUL ATTACKS TO IMMEDIATELY CANCEL INTO ANY OTHER ACTION, SIR. THIS MULTIPLIES THE COMBO POTENTIAL OF ANY CHARACTER TENFOLD, SIR. TURBO MODE CREATES LIGHTNING FAST GAMEPLAY REMINISCENT OF DBZ, SIR.
Dynasty Warriors 8 Xtreme Legends Complete Edition (Vita)
This game is fucking massive, there is seriously too much to do. And it preforms pretty well considering its ported from the PS3/PS4. It still get massive slowdown when shit gets real but supposedly a patch coming. All in all I wanted another portable Warriors game after Samurai Warriors: Chronicles and this game is pretty stellar for that. 7/10
YUMI'S ODD ODYSSEY, SIR.
THE TETHER MECHANICS ARE WELL-DESIGNED AND FUN TO USE, IT HAS A FANTASTIC DIFFICULTY CURVE, AND FINDING DOORS/BACKPACKS GIVES THE GAME AN EXTRA LAYER OF CHALLENGE. HOWEVER, BOSSES ARE SOMETHING OF AN UNFUN SLOG.
OVERALL, WOULD RECOMMEND TO ANY FAN OF PLATFORMERS, SIR.
For a game made in 2006, it's not too dated. Especially since Bethesda hasn't updated its tech. That being said, Oblivion has both action adventure and RPG elements working in tandem without making the play feel too godlike powerful with the leveling system, which keeps the game fair for the most part. A solid mesh of the RPG set up by Morrowind, and the action focus of its sequel Skyrim. Oblivion is the shit. 9/10 I STILL PLAY IT VANILLA , SERGEANT!
anyone else imagining the guy in OP as Sergeant Dornan?
Look at this faggot.
The levelling system in Oblivion can be called many things, but not a system which keeps things fair for the player since you either minmax or you get weaker than you were before with every level up due to how the levelled lists and levelled loot is handled.
SIR, YES SIR!
DUNGEONS OF DREDMOR IS AN INDIE-DEVELOPED ROGUELIKE AVAILABLE ON STEAM FOR A RATHER REASONABLE PRICE. ITS EASY TO LEARN, BUT VERY DIFFICULT TO MASTER. WITH 10 FLOORS OF SCALING DIFFICULTY AND OVER 40 SKILL TREES, ITS REPLAY VALUE IS VERY HIGH. IT MAY BE FULL OF REFERENCES TO OTHER THINGS, BUT IT MAKES FUN OF MANY GENRES WITH TONGUE PLANTED FIRMLY IN CHEEK AND IS QUITE CLEVER IN ITS OWN RIGHT.
SIR, WOULD BUY DLC FOR, SIR!
TALES OF THE ABYSS (3DS)
DECENT PORT OF A GREAT ACTIVE-COMBAT JRPG
SHORT LOADING TIMES, TONS OF CONTENT AND THE TOUCH SCREEN WORKS BETTER WITH ARTES THAN EXPECTED; YOU MIGHT STILL MISS THE R STICK
BASICALLY BUY THIS GAME IF YOU ENJOY GREAT CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT, EXCELLENT COMBAT, GOOD MUSIC AND QUIRKY HUMOR WITH LOTS OF PROFANITY
SIR YES SIR!
IT IS ARCHAIC, BUT THE ROLE PLAYING AND SPELLCRAFTING ARE DEEPER THAN YOU FOOT UP >>253922418 'S ASS SIR!
JUST BEWARE OF PLAYING AS A STEALTHY CLASS, AS IT MIGHT BE BORING AS SHIT AT FIRST, SIR!
FOR THE FIRST FEW CHARACTERS, I RECOMMEND ANY COMBINATION OF FIGHTERS AND SPELLCASTERS, SIR!
THE DUNGEON CRAWLING IS ALSO SUPERB, SIR!
THE ONLY REAL PROBLEMS WITH IT ARE THE BUGS AND THE ARCHAIC DESIGN THAT MIGHT GET IN THE WAY OF THE FUN, OF WHICH THERE IS A TON TO BE HAD, SIR!
SIR, 8.5/10, SIR!
There isnt a TI alive thatd let a grunt get away with insubordination. Theyd floor you, kick the shit out of you, and the punish the unit. The unti would then beat you into a coma
THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: TWILIGHT PRINCESS IS A PRETTY OKAY GAME, SIR! I AM PLAYING THE WII VERSION, SO THE CONTROLS FEEL PRETTY WAGGLY AND I THINK THAT DETERIORATES FROM THE OVERALL EXPERIENCE MORE THAN IT ENHANCES IT, BUT THE GAME ITSELF IS PRETTY SOLID, ALBEIT HAVING A VERY SLOW INTRODUCTION. IT'S WORTH PLAYING, ESPECIALLY IF YOU CAN FIND THE GAMECUBE VERSION, SIR!
Persona 4 Golden, sir!
The dungeon crawling is less intrusive, the fusion system is fun, and the story is silly, but fun, sir! Buy it if you like JRPGs, but aren't massively into dungeon crawlers, sir!
CORPORAL SHEPARD, HUH? SOUNDS MORE LIKE CORPORAL DOG MEAT TO ME
PERSONA 2: INNOCENT SIN, SIR!
IT'S DIFFERENT FROM 3 AND 4 AND THERE'S NO SOCIAL LINK BULLSHIT, SIR!
IT'S DOESN'T SHOVE GIRLS DOWN YOUR THROAT, SIR!
THERE'S A DIFFICULTY CURVE THAT REWARDS STRATEGY AND PLANNING, TOO, SIR!
IF YOU LIKE RPGS IT'S PRETTY GOOD, 6/10 WOULD RECOMMEND.
SIR! THIS PRIVATE HAS BEEN PLAYING THE DESTINY BETA SIR. THIS PRIVATE FEELS HOPEFUL FOR THE FULL GAME BUT IS NOT EXPECTING GOTY SIR.
IF YOU HAVE THE PATIENCE TO INSTALL 30+ MODS TO MAKE IT BEARABLE, SIR, BUY IT SIR!
OTHERWISE, PLAY OBLIVION, OR BETTER YET, MORROWIND, WHICH DOESN'T HAVE ITS WRITING WRITTEN BY A STUPID SHIT LIKE YOU SIR, AND HAS DEPTH THAT SOMEONE ABOVE 5 COULDN'T UNDERSTAND SIR! UNLIKE SKYRIM, SIR!
SIR YES SIR
DONKEY KONG COUNTRY RETURNS 3D, SIR, IT WAS FUN
IT LOOKED REAL NICE ON THE 3DS XL'S SCREEN AND I'M TOLD IT PLAYS BETTER THAN THE WII VERSION, SIR
CAN I STILL GET YOUR BOOT UP MY ASS, SIR
I feel like the Witcher is pretty fun. Its definitely a game you need to play with the wiki open in the overlay. I learned that the hard way when I spent a a lot of time trying to complete a search quest that I later learned you couldnt complete until later in the game. Another complaint is that there are some quests that can only be completed at a certain time(which is understandable) but you can only wait at certain locations so you have to tediously run back and forth to these places, so I recommend the wait anywhere mod. BUT overall I would say its an 8/10
SIR! ARTIFICIAL ACADEMY 2, SIR!
IT'S A SIMPLISTIC CUSTOMISABLE DATING SIM WITH INTERACTIVE H-SCENES SIR! THERE IS QUITE A LOT OF TRIAL AND ERROR INVOLVED UNTIL YOU ARE USED TO IT BUT I'VE SPILLED A LOT OF SEMEN TO IT, SIR!
I-I uh... I p-played... it was...
oh god please stop yelling
DRAGON'S DOGMA, SIR! FIRST REAL FANTASY WORLD THAT MANAGES TO PULL OFF A GRIM, SERIOUS SETTING. AWESOME WIDE RANGE OF CLASSES BRANCHING FROM BASIC CLASSES, GIVING YOU AN EASY-TO-GET-INTO START IN THIS HARDCORE GAME. HOWEVER - NO DISRESPECT, SIR - IF YOU DO NOT GO MYSTIC KNIGHT YOU NEED NOT APPLY, SIR.
WOLVES HUNT IN PACKS
MOTHER 3 IS A GAME THAT IS SIMPLE AND FUN, BUT DOES LITTLE TO INNOVATE ON THE JRPG ARCHETYPE OF GAMEPLAY. A PROPER DIFFICULTY AND BEAUTIFUL ATMOSPHERE, STORY, AND CHARACTERS MAKE IT A MUST PLAY HOWEVER.
if you get weaker as you level, you're the one at fault
E.Y.E. DIVINE CYBERMANCY SIR.
I'VE NO IDEA WHAT'S HAPPENING, OR WHY I'M DOING IT, BUT I'M KILLING PEOPLE FOR BROUZOUFS AND THE GREATER GOOD. COOL RPG/FPS WITH A NIVE HACKING MINIGAME AND WEAPONS THAT FEEL POWERFULL, WOULD PLAY A SPACE MARINE GAME MADE BY THE SAME DEV
SUPER MARIO 3D WORLD
THE LEVEL DESIGN MAKES FOR REWARDING EXPLORATION. THE MULTIPLAYER IS A CHAOTIC BUT ENJOYABLE MESS. THE WORLD THEMES MAKE NO SENSE THOUGH, WHY HAVE A DESERT THEMED WORLD WITH ONLY ONE DESERT LEVEL AND AN ICE THEMED WORLD WITH ONLY ONE ICE LEVEL. IF YOU HAVE BEEN FOLLOWING THE SERIES THEN YOU WILL REALISE IT DOES NOT DO ANYTHING TOO REVOLUTIONARY, BUT IT CAN STILL BE ENJOYABLE.
I WOULD RECOMMEND IT, SIR!
First GTA game I've ever played the story of (brother had GTA 3 and I'd go on murder rampages but that was it) and I'm loving it.
Liberty City is huge and varied, feels
comfyas fuck just driving around at night or in the rain. Driving took a little bit of time to get used to but feels fine now.
Main complaints are my buddies constantly calling me to play darts/bowl/eat/etc., which has been a common complaint from people in the past since this shit is pretty repetitive and really does happen a lot between missions. However, if you make plans and immediately call back to cancel them you get no relationship penalty, so that's one way out.
Only other real complaint is that the missions can sometimes be a little repetitive. Also chasing people in cars down in your car is ridiculously difficult at times and usually takes me two or three tries, but thankfully this doesn't happen so often that its a major detriment to the game.
Like the plot overall. Niko and Roman in particular are extremely likable in my opinion and I actually care about what happens to them. I haven't quite finished the game yet, but several parts already stick out to me as extremely memorable.
Michelle's betrayal felt really personal, I didn't see that coming. I assumed she was just so generic so she could be the dating tutorial so you could later branch out to others. I already wanted to cheat on her and was looking at the online dating profiles, but even so the hurt was real when it turned out she was working for the cops/feds/whoever
Not going to give it a number rating, because fuck that, but I'd highly recommend it. I know this shit wasn't concise BUT FUCK YOU SARGE.
>does little to innovate on the jrpg archetype of gameplay
I disagree, I think the whole music/rhythm thing was a really nice addition that kept combat fresh through to the end
SPACE ENGINEERS, SIR!
IT IS STILL A WORK IN PROGRESS, BUT UPDATES WEEKLY, SIR!
ITS A BIT IF A TIME SINK LIKE MINECRAFT AND ISN'T MUCH FUN WITHOUT FRIENDS, WHICH I HA E NONE OF, SIR!
PLEASE BE MY FRIEND, SIR!
MONSTER HUNTER 3 ULTIMATE ON 3DS, SIR! YOU KILL LARGE MONSTERS, CARVE THEM UP, AND MAKE WEAPONS AND ARMOR OUT OF THEM. THERE ARE QUITE A FEW WEAPON TYPES, GUN LANCE (poking stick with a shotgun attached) IS BY FAR THE BEST. EACH WEAPON HAS A COMPLETLEY DIFFERENT PLAYSTYLE, SIR. IT FEELS LIKE A NEW GAME WITH EACH WEAPON. IT CAN BE DIFFICULT, BUT WITH THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP AND SKILL YOU CAN MAKE IT THROUGH.
Usual Scribblenauts, though with a new points system (doing good stuff/missions/starites from specific levels) for unlocking and a bunch of heroes/gear/vehicles in the batputer thing, gameplay-wise basically a bunch of premades.
Oh, there also for purchasing extra continues in story missions.
The missions can very much get annoying in how scripted they are, forcing you to restart and go through unskippable cutscenes if you try to deviate from the script.
Dude holding hostages? You have to get him down.
He falls off the building and level/dying? TRY AGAIN, that way he can tell you the Lex Luther's responsible which you already fucking know.
Some pig green lantent whatever has the Starite? Doing anything but what the game wants, including killing or tranquilizing him, requires you to retry and sit through a 4 minute cutscene.
Also, none of the original stuff people made for Unlimited is available, nor have people made a fraction as much stuff for Unmasked as they have Unlimited.
SIR! I PLAYED BRAVELY DEFAULT SIR!
IT WAS A GOOD ROLEPLAY GAME AND THE SPIRITUAL SUCCESSOR OF THE GOOD FINAL FANTASY SERIES THAT I LOVED. BUT I MUST SAY THAT THE SECOND HALF OF THE GAME IS NOT AS GOOD AS THE FIRST SIR!
that's min-maxing, i've done plenty of games where i wouldn't min-max yet still be good enough.
also, if by 5/5/1 you mean raising your luck, that's the worst idea ever, luck is almost completly useless in oblivion
SOUL SACRIFICE DELTA, DRILL SERGEANT. IT'S WHAT THE ORIGINAL SHOULD HAVE BEEN AND I'VE BEEN PLAYING IT DAILY SINCE RELEASE, DRILL SERGEANT. GRINDING FOR ARCHFIEND ARMS IS A PAIN IN THE ASS, THOUGH, DRILL SERGEANT.
I just got out of basic a few months ago and they weren't even allowed to yell at us beyond barking orders.
I was really disappointed, I had signed up and readied myself for the full experience and all I got was "listen I want you out of here because I hate working with you guys. You all behave well enough so whatever. Don't run in the hall" attitude.
SIR YES SIR
LEFT 4 DEAD 2 SIR
IT'S HAD LASTING APPEAL AND I BOUGHT IT BOTH ON A CONSOLE AND PC, SIR. I'VE PLAYED IT FOR YEARS.
Most gripes are due to things not being quite as PC-oriented graphically as before, things like view models. Nothing that truly affects gameplay and can't be fixed with a few console commands.
Overall, it takes the gameplay and setup of the first game and just adds more - more items, more weapons, more campaigns, more varied gameplay. Somehow you can play the same campaign a thousand times and still enjoy it. The randomization brought by the AI Director keeps is somehow fresh. Get a group of friends together and you'll have a great time, every time, with a horror theme to it. Something that appeals to me greatly. Add the amount of mods and campaigns available on the Workshop and elsewhere, it being one of the last true bastions for PC modding, and you have a good package, SIR.
But if you don't have friends to play it with, don't do it. It's boring on single-player. The Versus/Survival gamemodes get old VERY quick in my opinion, just padding out the game with little substance or entertainment. A lot of what 2 added fell flat, but what's there is worth it.
IN SHORT SIR, IT'S A SLIGHT IMPROVEMENT ON THE FIRST! GET FOR JOLLY CO-OPERATION, IF NO CO-OPERATION, DON'T GET IT, SIR!
POSTAL 2, SIR! AS PURE A BLACKLY HUMOROUS MURDER SIMULATOR AS YOU WILL EVER FIND IN RETAIL, SIR! IT'S NOT A SOCIAL COMMENTARY OF ANY SORT, ITS AN OPPORTUNITY TO DECAPITATE CIVILIANS WITH A MACHETE BOOMERANG! AND IT'S AWESOME, SIR!
GARRY'S MOD SIR. IT'S PRETTY FUN TO PLAY WITH FRIENDS, BUT FINDING A SERVER WITHOUT ASPIE 8 YEAR OLDS IS DAMN NEAR IMPOSSIBLE. 7/10 TRY TO GET A PRIVATE SERVER OR USE HAMACHI OR SOME SHIT.
Oh that's interesting to hear. I'm heading off in October.
I went to RSP last weekend and got smoke because I made a comment and a drill sergeant who happened to be there heard it.
SIR YES SIR
SHOWED THOSE DIRTY RUSKIES WHO'S BOSS.
GAME IS BUGGED OUT OF EXISTENCE, MY TANK FLIPS OVER JUST BY STANDING STILL.
THE COMBAT IS INTUITIVE AND REALISTIC, WHICH PROVIDES ACTUAL FUN.
I HIGHLY RECOMMEND YOU PLAY IT, SIR!
FINAL FANTASY XIV
A FUN ONLINE EXPERIENCE BUT HINDERED BY MANY THINGS WHICH WEAKEN IT. CHIEFLY FORCED DUNGEONS AND BOSS FIGHTS WHICH BLOCK PROGRESSION. SECONDLY, A MOSTLY INCOMPETENT USERBASE.
The only people I talked to who said they still get yelled at and even hit are Marines, and I understand that. They actually need to be sent through the works to test their metal since they're front line.
TIs hate Sir Sandwiches as it was called when I went through. It's just "Yes Sir".
Divinity: Original Sin
Deep-ish mechanics, character building, and combat.
Throwback to old tabletop RPGs like DnD.
But also often tedious, hampered by level gating, arbitrarily punishing, and full of dialog and walking. You can spend the first hour of the game walking and talking to people, only to leave town and only have a handful of non-respawning fights available to you to level up off of.
>7 out of 8 fights right outside of town are too hard for a low level party, so after spending 20-40 minutes talking to people in town and recruiting 2 party members, you have to go out a specific gate and start killing enemies in a small area until you level up and can slightly expand that area.
>Repeated for the rest of the early game. When you run into enemies higher level than you, it means you missed some same-level mobs somewhere else and should backtrack because otherwise the level difference will rape you.
8/10 on depth and complexity as well as visuals and music
5/10 on plot
4/10 on actual combat
3/10 on exploration
2/10 on replayability because even though you can make a variety of classes with the skill system, there's too much tedious dialog and walking back and forth for a normal person to bother playing the game more than once.
Went to the
Bootcamp here is WAY more hardcore than how the movies portray American bootcamp.
Officers do shout, but only when they're pissed (which they usually are, but not all the time). The real problem is the fact that you don't just get yelled at if you don't do what needs to be done. You refuse anything that is legal of them to ask you, and you're going to jail.
Either that or they lied to us, which is unlikely.
>Heroes of the Storm
Best ASSFAGGOTS game since Dota.
First meaningful improvement on the Aeon of Strife genre since Dota came out.
>Either that or they lied to us, which is unlikely.
Yeah, it's not like a Jew has ever lied to anyone before.
PROJECT :M , IF YOU ENJOY SMASH AND WANT TO PLAY WITH BETTER PHYSICS THEN BRAWL ITS EASY TO PLAY CASUALY WITH ITEMS AND YOU GET TO PLAY THE NEW CHARACTERS, GOOD FOR TOURNEY FAGS WHO WANT PEOPLE TO MOVE ON FROM MELEE ( SUCH AS MYSELF) ITS GOOD FROM A CASUAL PERSPECTIVE AND A TOURNEYFAG ONE, HIGHLY RECOMMEND
It's likely they did lie to you. that sort of intimidation is supposed to break your spirit so they can manipulate you into what they want you to be, which in this case is a mindless bullet sponge that will willingly run to his death for his leaders' ideals.
1.The game runs at a very consistent 60, or near 60 fps. The graphics are decent, but as usual with the 360, the textures are shit.
2. The game feels stripped down and monotonous, mainly due to Bethesda raising hell about that game being too similar to Fallout 3, and pushing to be the publishers ofr Rage.
3. The gun play is nice and challenging, I thoroughly enjoy it.
4. Voice acting is freakin' amazing. Best voice acting I have ever heard.
5. Rest of the game is garbage. The guns are all peashooters, the game doesn't have free roaming exploration, and is just "get this quest at point A, go to point B, kill a dude, rinse, repeat".
Overall, the game looks nice and has interesting combat, but overall meh. I wouldn't call it shit, but it isn't great. Play it if you want to see a console game at a very consist 60 fps.
COUNTER-STRIKE: GLOBAL OFFENSIVE, SIR!
IT HAD A WEIRD SYSTEM OF DETERMINING YOUR SKILL LEVEL AND MATCHING, SIR!
PLAYING COMPETITIVE WITHOUT FRIENDS IS LIKE BEING IN THE CORPS AND GOING TO SLEEP WITHOUT A RIFLE, SIR!
THEY ALSO KEEP CHANGING THE RULES, SIR! I DON'T THINK I CAN HACK IT, SIR! I'M GOING THE WAY OF LEONARD, SIR!
CS:GO IS BASICALLY THE SAME SHIT BUT LOOKS BETTER, SIR!
THERE'S NO GOOD GAMES, SO I WILL CONTINUE KILLING TERRORISTS IN IT, SIR!
PERMISSION TO PEE, SIR!?
I actually wasn't going to be a fighter.
With the mandatory drafting, the army has too many under-qualified people and nothing to do with them.
I was going to be a fucking radio operator
The Israeli military is quite shit, I did joint with them back in '10 and they're incompetent as fuck. They survive mostly due to all their "enemies" being weak civilians and them having far superior firepower than their opposition.
They're quickly finding out having women on the front-line is a lethally horrendous idea too, which they should have immediately picked up on from every other country having found that out years ago and putting a stop to it.
SIR, BRAVO TEAM FROM 4TH INFANTRY HAS INFORMED ME THAT VIDEO GAMES WILL CONTINUE TO SUCK UNTIL THE INDUSTRY COLLAPSES!
DO YOU HAVE THE AUTHORITY TO TELL ME HOW TRUE THIS IS, SIR!?
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS!? ARE YOU CALLING EACH COMMUNIST, DICK-SUCKING, FAGGOT SHIT NAMES IN MY BELOVED CORPS?
DROP AND GIVE ME FIFTY YOU SHITSTACK. I WILL BE INFORMING SERGEANT MAJOR OP OF YOUR INSUBORDINATION, YOU FUCKWIT.
If you want to take out the fact women cannot reach the physical requirements of frontline infantry that men can meet, then it's the fact most men will throw their lives in danger to protect women as it's a common thought process to put women and children first above all else.
And rape as well. And women don't handle stress and shit as well as men do (or at least not in a way that is healthy on the battlefield). Plus, with all the rape and sexual harassment ALREADY going on.
There's actually a lot less rape than you'd think, only the Navy really ever has that problem.
The Army is full of barracks whores and you'd only rape someone if you were really desperate, in the Marines if you rape someone they'll take you somewhere quite and kill you, and everyone is too busy being a fucking nerd in the USAF.
Sir! Metal Gear Solid: Snake Eater, sir!
The pacing in this game is terrible, sir!
The boss fights were in understandable intervals at first, but I found myself fighting The Fear and The End within just five minutes of each other, sir!
What a shame! The regular gameplay sections are fun and challenging, and sections leading to boss fights should have more anticipation!
SIR. KILLER IS DEAD, SIR.
IT'S LIKE NO MORE HEROES BUT WITH EVEN LESS SENSE. THE "STUN" STATE, THE GRINDING AND SOME SIDE MISSIONS WILL DRIVE YOU NUTS THOUGH, SIR.
OVERALL IT'S A PRETTY GOOD ACTION GAME, TOTALLY RECOMMENDED IF YOU BUY IT AT LOW PRICE, SIR.
THE LAST GAME I PLAYED WAS A GAME CALLED SUPERBALL, SIR.
IT'S A GAME IN EARLY ALPHA THAT A FRIEND OF MINE SHOWED ME SIR.
IT'S SOCCER EXCEPT WITH SHOCK-WAVES AND INSANE JUMPS AND SHIT.
EVEN THOUGH IT'S IN VERY EARLY ALPHA THE GAMEPLAY IS ACTUALLY VERY ENJOYABLE, THE GAME IS VERY INTENSE AND IT LOOKS PROMISING, SIR.
YOU SHOULD GIVE IT A TRY BY GOING TO THE WEBSITE AND DOWNLOADING IT FOR FREE, SIR.
I FORGOT THE LINK, SIR.
SIR YES SIR !
CONTRAST HAD A LOT OF INTERESTING IDEAS BUT ALMOST ALL OF THEM FELL FLAT. THE SHADOW MECHANIC IS EXTREMELY UNDERUSED AND THE MANIPULATION OF SHADOWS IS BASIC AND LIMITED TO A FEW SMALL CONSTRAINED AREAS IN THE GAME. THE PLATFORMING CONTROLS ARE JUNKY AND YOU OFTEN GET THROWS OUT OF THE SHADOWS FOR NO REAL REASON. THE GAME IS ALSO BUGGY AND GLITCHY AND YOU OFTEN GET STUCK IN THE AIR. THE STORY STARTED OF INTERESTING AND VERY PERSONAL BUT IT WASNT CONCLUDED IN A SATISFACTORY WAY NOT TO MENTION THAT THE CONNECTION BETWEEN THE STORY AND THE GAMEPLAY AND THE SHADOW MECHANIC IS LOOSE AS BEST. THE ENVIRONMENTS WAS A BIT NICE THOUGH BUT THE FACT THAT I SOMETIMES FOUND MYSELF ABLE TO WALK THROUGH SOLID OBJECT WAS A DOWNER. OVERALL IT WASNT A VERY IMPRESSIVE GAME AND IT SURE AS HELL WASNT AS INTERESTING AS THE VISUALS MAKES IT OUT TO BE. AND DID I MENTION THAT IT IS SHORT AS HELL AND THAT IT CAN BE FINISHED IN AROUND 4 HOURS.
IT MIGHT BE WORTH A PLAY IF YOU WANT TO WASTE A FEW HOURS BUT KEEP YOUR ANTICIPATION LOW AND DONT PAY TO MUCH FOR IT.
Well drill sergeant, I have just actually finished watch dogs and while it's still fresh on the mind I'll give my opinions. Watch dogs is a open world game that has a lot of problems in the fact that there are a ton of ben there done that kind of moments. Here are my examples the stealth, that is pretty poor might I add sir, has been done in gta is something we've seen. Another is your typical open world follow this guy and stay within boundries which if I may say Sargeant is getting pretty old. To cut a loundry list of grievances short if you played gta or the most recent assassin's creed you know the general mission layout. Story wise I thought it was kinda neato but nothing stellar. The problem I have with the story in one part is the main character Aiden who compared to the rest of the cast is bland. It is also kinda silly that he sounds like Christian Bale Batman. The multiplayer is your standard race, death match etc. But what I that was a cool idea is that people can come in your game and hack you. All in all it was pretty average I still liked it even I maybe I should not
4/5 because I hate 10 point scales
Also fuck you ubisoft and your jew greedy dlc
DEUS EX, SIR. FIRST PLAYTHROUGH, SIR. I PLAYED IT BECAUSE /V/ SAID IT'S GOOD, SIR
IT'S OUTDATED AS FUCK, SIR. THE STORY IS PRETTY FUCKING GOOD, SIR. THE LEVEL DESING IS GOD-LIKE, SIR. ALSO, THE CHARACTERS ARE PRETTY LIKEABLE, SIR.
10/10 WHEN IT CAME OUT, SIR
ROCK SOLID 8.75 TODAY, SIR.
its a fun multiplayer game where you where you shoot your neighboring planets with railguns, missiles, lasers and asteroids. still in alpha so its not finished but it shows potential to be a good game.
Buy it and lets play together OP
It's mostly due to control, I imagine. Playing through the original Fable now is a pain in the ass because it controls like utter shit, but it was my favorite game some time ago.
>Persona Rip Off
>story is the equivalent of an extremely badly written anime
>entire game is basically a visual novel with dungeon crawling segments
Don't buy it.
THERE ARE GAMES THAT AGE WELL AND ARE ABLE TO TIMELESSLY ENTERTAIN DIFFERENT GENERATIONS OF AUDIENCES, AND SOME THAT AGE POORLY AND QUICKLY HAVE THE LOVE FOR THEM WITHER OUT. ALTHOUGH DEUS EX IS NOT THAT OLD
SIR YES SIR!
LAST GAME I PLAYED WAS DEAD SPACE 3 SIR! I FOUND IT LACKING IN THEMATIC ELEMENTS THAT MADE 1 AND 2 APPEALING! GATED CONTENT FROM EA LOCKS AREAS AWAY FROM YOU UNLESS YOU ARE WITH A FELLOW MARINE, WHICH HINDERS THE ATMOSPHERE!
3/10!! WOULD NOT RECOMMEND!