> I would say the same thing, just to be polite. Let me tell you something that might be a bit dangerous. I was raised in Japan. I was schooled in martial arts. I was given the title of master. They take a movie “The Last Samurai.” They have a 5-foot-2-inch little guy, whether he was straight or gay, I don’t know. I don’t care. He had never been to Japan. He doesn’t speak Japanese. He has never held a sword. They make him the Last Samurai. We got 450,000 phone calls [laughs] from everybody in the world saying, “That role was perfect for you. How did that happen?” Most of the people I know didn’t like the film and didn’t go see it. It’s just a classic example of Hollywood and the politics.
>According to Mr. Seagal, he’s a former Navy SEAL. It’s unclear where the Stout Sensei served, could it have been in Vietnam? Wait, no, that was when he was serving with the CIA. Anyhow, Seagal had been telling former business partner and ex-soldier Gary Goldman that he’d been a Frogman. Goldman was suspicious. Then one day, when pal Randy Widner invited both out to dive for treasure, Goldman’s suspicions only grew more.
As he relayed: “Randy was driving [a Zodiac raft] in circles while Steven and I carried the gear out to him. The surf was unbelievable, really tough… He started screaming and panicking and was sure he was going to die and all that crap. Wildner had to pull Seagal by his hair; I pushed his ass onto the boat with my shoulder.” That night Goldman realised that Seagal could not read a compass nor a map. He then concludd that Seagal “would surely die of starvation if he was given a compass and a map that led to a restaurant five miles away.”
>Putins best buddy
>Putin is ex KGB
>Black belt in Aikido
>Honorary black belt in Judo, Karate & Shibari
>weekend Sheriff deputy Chief
>Has Mafia friends
>Trains Russian Special Forces
>loves animals & nature
>knows ancient Japanese wisodws
>Worlds best 1911 shooter
>Worlds best Katana fighter
>Honorary Russian Citizen
>Fluently speaks 12 languages
this guy is fucking based!
Seagal being an ultrahard badass apparently own a tailor made tuxedo that is designed to fit two 1911 pistols in.
Apparently Seagal needed to be armed at the Oscar event in case he would attacked while accepting his award on the stage.
Didn't his first Japanese waifu say he only got the black belt because the referee fell asleep?
That is hysterical and so fucking Japanese for some reason.
She also said he cried when the Yakuza was after him.
Where does he take the money to pay them?
It's not nice to laugh at autists
What do you think about Seagal and Putins friendship?
Seagal is ex CIA and Putin is ex KGB. coincidence?
This looks like Mac from It's Always Sunny's idea of dancing
Chael Sonnen said that he pays fighters to be around them. Chael does lie quite a bit though.
>Anybody seen Richie?!
>Anybody know why Richie did Bobby Lupo?!
Why not just have a camera follow Putin everyday.
Putin literally lives the everyday life that Seagals lives in his movies. Constant assassination attempts, taking down terrorist cells, saving Russia from its enemies and being a badass machoman who rides a motorcycle with Russian hellsangels.
>whether he was straight or gay, I don’t know. I don’t care.
And he shouldn't, since the greatest warlord ever lived, Oda Nobunaga, was pounding his general's (Ranmaru Mori) boypussy hard all day every day.
>yfw CockPuncher is Steven Seagal's best movie.
>mfw he now has serbian citizenship
P-pls be my country's president s-senpai
Seagal knows ancient Japanese wisdow and witchcraft
Same ancient wisdow he used to grow his hair back
Vladimir Putin is a very poor example of a leader. He's homophobic, which means that his fear of what he doesn't understand manifests itself in other ways, such as the need to control what others think and do and, one would imagine, infrequent bouts of rage. It would also come as a complete lack of surprise to me, if he was also impotent.
Such a pathetic, fearful manlet (and possible latent-homosexual) in control of one of the world's most-powerful nations, presents a veritable threat indeed to not only neighbouring countries, but the entire world.
>ex KGB assassin
>martials arts expert
>Lead interrigator for GRU in Afghanistan
>earned the name "Shalashaska"
>Most badass man in Russia
>has saved Russia dozen times
>ISIS fears him
Putin could kill you in a instant second and would crush your pathetic weak western country like a bug
Seagal came to your country to train your Serbian Police Special Forces
he will teach your police officers all kind of cool stuff like Aikido, maskmanship, hostage rescue tactics, counter intelligence and many cool stuff he learned in CIA
Unfortunately, that really happened, but anyone here in right mind saw what kind of a shitshow it actually was. Our (literally) mentally ill prime minister puts up with his shit just like we put up with his. I personally blame fucking russians for that delusional douchebags "fame" here
It's normal for every Russian criminal upraised in 80s. It was in crimnal code big ritualistic chunk of it, it still is though west tolerance start to erode its hardcorness (back in the days kissing whore on the lips or doing any oral sex with wife would make you gay in the others eyes, today it is don't ask don't tell policy). You should understand the environment and don't try to judge everyone by your US millennial standards.
Putin actually started his career in KGB.
He spent his youth in the mean streets of Moscow and he was recruited by the KGB when a KGB officer saw Putin and saw the potential in Putin. He was trained to become a assassin and soon became the worlds most deadliest hitman in the world.
Its all in Putin's own book
>“He said Seagal is calling [Irwin] and he’s all shook up on the other side, and Irwin’s like, ‘…Are you crying?’. [Segal] is like, ‘Yes, I’m crying… I just read the script. It’s amazing! It’s brought me to tears… It’s unbelievable.’”
>Irwin, excited to learn who wrote the script, asked “Master” Seagal who wrote it.
>“[Seagal] goes, ‘I wrote it.'”
Only Seagal can make Seagal cry
>it's all in Putin's own book
It must be true.
>Putin actually started his career in KGB
It was after he become street thug. His career started in judo dojo with sensei been illegal currency trader (posh specialty in 70- 80s). By his origin and intellectual abilities Putin could not enter prestigious Leningrad State University. He studied there as athlete student. His most close inner circle people are dated back to that dojo or University study times.
>They have a 5-foot-2-inch little guy, whether he was straight or gay, I don’t know. I don’t care.
Yeah, that doesn't sound like a Samurai at all.
>everybody in the world saying, “That role was perfect for you. How did that happen?”
Come on Steven, nobody said that.