>It's a great product. I love the product. And I love you! We don't see this kind of energy from our entrepreneurs often. I'd love to make you an offer. My offer is for -
>This would go great in one of the kiosks by the halfcourt bathrooms. My offer is 10k for 49% and if you look back at Robert I will literally throw this chair at you and pummel your body until my fists crack through the concrete below the floor.
>Wow, great deal. Looking forward to working with you Mr. Cuban
>why am I here?
>I'd rather be doing Golden Corral commercials
My name is Jeb Bush, and I'm running for president in 2016. I come from a long line of distinguished presidents, and my campaign has been running to continue this tradition. I've been the governor of Florida, and I married a latino woman. This campaign has received heavy investment from the establishment, and I look forward to continuing that investment with you, and we can do Jeb! 2016.
Kevin: How are your numbers so far?
Jeb: Well, we're currently polling around 2-3%.
Kevin: What are you chasing?
Jeb: Unfortunately Mr. Trump is at 40%.
Kevin: I'm out.
Mark: Mr. Trump is actually a fellow businessman who I have already endorsed for president, and I can't invest against him, so I'm out.
Robert: How much are you asking for?
Jeb: I am asking for a $200 million investment, and in return you get 70% of the top lobbying rights on executive decisions.
Robert: How much have you spent so far?
Jeb: To date we've spent $128 million.
Kevin: See, this is why I was out, I knew this was trouble from the start.
Robert: Jeb, how can you possibly think you can continue this campaign? Where is the money going?
Kevin: He's DEAD, this is not happening, he just doesn't know it yet. DEAD!
Mark: Yeah look Jeb you're a nice guy and I'm not going to jerk you around, I know Robert will try to soothe your feelings here but listen to Kevin on this one.
Robert: Well look I can't come down on your whole campaign, but for me, with those numbers, I'm out.
Jeb: T-thank you sharks.
"There is a small island in the Himalayan Sea called Malderiki, upon which I own a large mansion. Every year afer the first rain, the Newport Beach Wine Society (of which I am a member) gathers at my mansion to watch the island's natives grovel in the mud as their pathetic straw dwellings are ripped apart by the rising waters. On this island there is also a fish, called a Piranha Giganticus. Coinciding with the first rain, this fish swims into the flooded island and begins to feed on the older and weaker natives of Malderiki. Unable to defend themselves from the killer fish and uttrly helpless, the natives make their way to my mansion in makeshift canoes. At this point, the Newport Beach Wine Society opens a bottle of pre-revolution French Chardonnay, dated no later than 1760, and places wagers on which native will be the first to reach the high ground of my sprawling lawn. Once the fish has fed and returned to the Sea, there are typically a handful of natives left on my lawn, at which point we activate the electric fence and release the crocodiles. Last year, during the crocodile feeding, a tiny speck of native flesh was flung from the lawn up to the balcony where the Newport Beach Wine Society was gathered and landed on my shoe. I retrieved the piece of flesh and placed it in my mouth, washing it down with a glass of Moldovan Pino Griggio. Right now, YOU are that piece of flesh."
I LOST MY BABY!
I LEARNED TO KNIT SOCKS FOR BOOTS WHILE IN THE HOSPITAL WITH A DEAD BABY!
>Well here's 1.25 million dollars for 10% of your company
>But you're going to have to hire more designers
>It's a smokers at a business pretend that there are local laws prohibiting electronic nicotine delivery devices and ask you to leave while smoking within 15 feet of the business entrance episode
>it's a hopeful person gets verbally destroyed episode
It's like you've never called them on their bullshit.
>My manager would sure have something to say if she saw you with that
(As it sits on the table in TGI Friday's)
"Good get her over here I want to talk to her"
>UHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I CAN'T HAVE A NICE DAY