You are training to become a Jedi and you get to select one character from the Star Wars universe to be your master.
My choice is pic related, what is yours?
>Qui Gon thought training Anakin was a good idea
>Obi Wan completely fucked up
>even Luke got all his apprentices killed by Kylo Ren
let's face it Yoda is the only decent master in the series
Then I'll have street cred with all the space niggas and they wont fuck wit me aight?
Imma be a realest dark side mofo if you sniff my drift
I'm leaning towards this
great fighter, knowledgeable in the Force (both sides), seems to be a kind of lawful dark (unlike Sheev) and is motivated by things other than complete power
What exactly was Dooku goal? Did he actually believe in the CIS or was fully supporting Sideous plan? Was he planning to overthrow Sideous? He was trying to recruit Obi Wan to his side, maybe as an apprentice to beat Sideous.
Windu because he was literally the only nigger to be focusing on combat still a thousand years after Sith bit it.
All the other Jedi had to just adapt or start relearning the old stuff, even Obi-Wan.
>That fucking face
Every fucking time.
I don't know, I rewatched AotC recently and it really confused me. He tells Obi Wan about Sheev's plot and begs him to help him foil it, but then is clearly Sheev's apprentice and part of his plan.
I'm guessing he was more in favor of the CIS in power and Palpatine getting overthrown?
My favorite part of this pic is just the fucking mess of limbs under that blanket
You can't even begin to tell what is what
He didn't figure out that Palpatine and Sidious were the same person until the very last moment of his life when Palpatine used the same voice as Sidious. The look on his face when Sheev told Anakin to kill him was the look of complete surprise and realization.
Kreia of course
>He didn't figure out that Palpatine and Sidious were the same person until the very last moment of his life when Palpatine used the same voice as Sidious.
If you watch the (canon) clone wars series it is obvious that Dooku knows who Sheev is.
I think he knew, everything pointed to him knowing
the look of surprise was probably because he wasn't expecting Sheev to have him executed, it dawned on him that he was grooming Anakin and he was expendable
Yaddle, no doubt. The only reason the other council members keep her in there is to be used as a cocksleeve. Her size makes her easy to grip and force onto your dong mouth-first.
I'd let her teach me many things. Grey Jedi like to fuck I hear.
anything except Sheev is the wrong answer
the best part would be
the late night training sessions where he would strip me naked and force lightning me to fuel my hatred, and then he'd reward my progress by going down on me
Can you even imagine the sex? After a long day of training you're both sweaty and covered in blood and she just pins you down on top of the corpse of a dead Jedi and just rides the force out of your balls.
If you're gonna go with a Sith at least make sure it's the best one and the most cock hungry.
Surprised this hasn't been posted yet
/tv/ is losing its edge
Fucking Christ I just remembered he said this. All throughout RotS when they're discussing a plot to destroy the Jedi and the darkside surrounding them Obi Wan never thinks to bring that up. Like "hey Dooku told me this thing once, maybe we should check it out just to be safe".
>wanting to be an apprentice to the most plot armored gary stu in SW history
his training would have no grounds in reality.
it would be him v.s. three rancors, he kills them all and then looks at you and says "see? it's easy, now you try."
>implying this roast beef wasn't used up a long long time ago.
maul and his brother probable tore that bitch up 10x a day tag teaming her relentlessly honing their force hate fucking.
damn her rebels design is so much sexier than clone wars
It's a combination of the eternal sith cycle (kill your master, take his place, get an apprentice) and Dooku's personal ambitions for the galaxy. He wanted to take the place as a master, and take Obi-Wan as his apprentice in order to serve his own interests, which were more noble than Palpatine's.
That was due to Obi Wan's High Ground Ability: A Certain Point of View, which grants Obi Wan the ability to have the High Ground from his perspective no matter what his positioning is.
He teaches me how to parasite off the goyim. And gives me a job in my choice of hollywood, education or mass media.
That's the nasty slut that took Yaddle's place on the Jedi Council after Yaddle sacrificed herself on Mawan.
These are facts that are taking up space in my brain where things like calculus used to be.
Crashing the Light Side…WITH NO SURVIVORS
Shouts out to the Dooku bros in this thread
What a fucking champ. Gotta love the fencing style.
You have much to learn young Padawan
I want to live in the Star Wars universe just so I can have sex slaves. They may be illegal in the republic but they sure as hell ain't doing shit to get rid of it.
have a togruta, twilek, pantoran, and mandelorian harem.
Are you ready for light saber training padawan?
>implying men can be raped
Fucking CIS scum.
>give her DSLs Dave, you know, for the kids
As the poet once said, "anything less than the best is a felony."
>It's too hot to wear regular clothes to train in this heat hope you don't mind anon
>Did I ever tell you about the time I faked my death and pretended to be my own Assassin? And how I didn't tell your father which led to the seeds of future distrust? He was a good friend.
Okay, but didn't know we were going for that ITT. But that's a good enough reason to have her up that high
>Obi-Wan trained Anakin you idiot
wait so Obi-Wan is only good tier because anakin's a cunt?
From my point of view You're a little shit
>I'm going to be a Tusken Jedi to piss people off
That's like rolling a moorish crusader.
>trained Dooku trained Qui-Gon trained Obi-Wan
>nearly a millennium of experience
>isn't gonna be any competition for the babes
>knows how to absorb Force lightning with his bare hands
>has a sense of humour
Easy choice, I reckon.
Source? Wookieepedia reckons Yoda's only apprentice was Dooku (and Luke if you want to include him).
Maybe he had 20000 Jedi students become Jedi while he was head of the Council, but only took one apprentice?
I'm certain I read it on some wookiepedia article though I'm also certain it wasn't Yoda's personal page
But considering it takes ~10 years to train a jedi knight and yoda has been a jedi master for 800 years that would be 80 padawan trained indeed
Doesn't seem like a good teacher or even very committed to actually training people
Never really got properly trained himself
I wouldn't be able to put up with his fortune cookie bullshit
Good teacher but seems a little too easy going. I'd probably enjoy learning from him the most but I probably wouldn't get as good as I could be
Seems like the kind of guy who would make a good spotter at the gym. He'd be that guy who doesn't help you at all and makes you bang out that one last rep.
It would probably be a pain in the ass but Obi-Wan-trained me could probably beat the shit out of Qui-gon-trained me.
Imagine being Yoda in that scene and having to be all like "damn, Yaddle, you fuckin' fine, all sexy with your tight body and horrific androgynous monster face. I would totally have sex with you, both my character and the real puppet." when all he really wants to do is fuck another Youngling in his dressing room. Like seriously imagine having to be Yoda and not only sit in that chair while Yaddle flaunts her disgusting body in front of you, the favorable lighting barely concealing her stretchmarks and leathery skin, and just sit there, take after take, hour after hour, while she perfected that stare. Not only having to tolerate her monstrous fucking visage but her haughty attitude as everyone on set tells her she's STILL GOT IT and DAMN, YADDLE LOOKS LIKE *THAT*?? because they're not the ones who have to sit there and watch her mannish fucking gremlin face contort into types of grimaces you didn't even know existed before that day. You've been fucking nothing but a healthy diet of wookies and protocol droids and later alleged rape victims for your ENTIRE CAREER coming straight out of the boonies in Dagobah. You've never even seen anything this fucking disgusting before, and now you swear you can taste the sweat that's breaking out on her dimpled stomach as she sucks it in to writhe it suggestively at you, smugly assured that you are enjoying the opportunity to get paid to sit there and revel in her "statuesque (for that is what she calls herself)" beauty, the beauty she worked so hard for with personal trainers in the previous months. And then Lucas calls for another take, and you know you could kill every single person in this room before the studio security could put you down, but you sit there and endure, because you're fucking Yoda. You're not going to lose your future Jedi Master career over this. Just bear it. Hide your face and bear it.
Why can't people keep their willies out of holes?
That's pretty much how it went in Jedi Academy
>be a complete newbie
>training missions include wiping out imperial bases and mass murdering smugglers while Rancor chases you
He seems like the most reasonable Jedi ever created.
I hope the new trilogy gives us a blaster wielding jedi. Luke was almost one in Empire but in Return went full saber.
Rey is apparently a fucking sniper with a sightless pistol after 3 shots so maybe she'll be one
>Emperor Palpatine Surgical Reconstruction Facility
>Not learning from multiple teachers through the ages
>palpatine lost all his hair when he went full sith
>anakin lost all his hair when he became darth vader
>darth maul never had any hair
Is there a way to join the Dark Side without looking like you're obviously a part of the Dark Side?
Like, maybe some Sith magic that can prevent your eyes from turning red or fucking up your skin complexion. Maybe if you accidentally lose a few limbs or have to be given a respirator, maybe there's some more aesthetically pleasing, non-threatening cybernetics available?
Dooku never looked all that evil. Not like the other 3 Sith anyway. Kreia/Traya also managed to go from being a Sith to being an exiled Jedi/Sith/whatever during the course of KOTOR 2. Revan managed to keep his appearance normal too. So did Malak until Revan fucked his up.
Darth Vectivus was apparently also a benevolent Sith Lord that didn't really have any desires to conquer the galaxy. Why he was a Sith Lord at all then AND continued the Rule of Two I don't know but he was apparently moderate and died surrounded by friends and family.
>Dooku was never full Sith
>Visits the Sith homeworld with his master in the Clone Wars
>RotS novelization has him visualize a Sith army under his and Palpatine's command
>Trains multiple disciples
>Called a Sith Lord
>Not a Sith
>Not picking pic related
I don't even wanna be a Sith, I just want to say I learned from Sheev.