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Let's have a newt Adventure.
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You are currently reading a thread in /trash/ - Off-Topic

Thread replies: 279
Thread images: 102
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Let's have a newt Adventure.

This is a newt.
>>
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Let's begin!
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>>890575
Hi newt I'm anon
Where we off to today?
>>
>>890596

What's on the table there, newt?
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>>890599
Hello anon! Today I am throwing a special birthday party. And I have to get ready. So I need to make a list of things I need to get.
What will I need for my Party anon?
>>
>>890643
>party hats
>streamers
>cake
>fruit punch
>>
A dragon dido, of course.
>>
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>>890632
A package of balloons and an empty punch bowl!
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>>890702
those look like condoms to me
>>
Who's party is it?
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>>890702
You need to fill both the bowl and the balloons with excessive amounts of red flavored kool-aid.
>>
can you regrow limbs?

can you grow extra limbs?
>>
>>890702

What kind of drink are you thinking of serving?

Also, do >>890694

Is it your birthday, by the way?
>>
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>>890694
>>890695
The list has been made.
>>890738
And will do!
>>
Go to stores and buy the stuff you need
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>>890775
We have enough cash for this stuff, right?
>>
>>890775

Don't forgot to lock your door when you leave!

And grab your purse, you need money to buy things.
>>
Do you know what rimming is? I would like for you to rim me.
>>
Have you invited anybody to your party yet, newt?
>>
>>890813

Don't be a dirty birdy!
>>
Why are you so fucking cute? Also don't forget the lube for the dild
>>
Might need to add friends to the list
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>>890734
Silly, that's for the bedroom.
>>890754
I can regrow limbs and old parts that mess up. but as far as extra limbs go...no.
>>890765
Punch and koolaid.

Also, It is my birthday!
>>890808
>>890812
I have 20 dollars.
>>890829
Oh! I should also grab invitations! Thank you anon!
>>
Happy birthday! Pretend I drew something.
>>
>>890850
I don't think $20 will be able buy us both cake and gallons of koolaid.
We need to -ahem- 'acquire' more funds.
>>
>>890850

Twenty dollars is good, we can get cupcakes instead of cake. It's not like anyone ever finishes a cake anyway.

Who will you invite?
>>
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>>890846
We'll add it to mental memory.
>>890847
....yes.
>>890879
But I don't get paid for another two weeks...I can't simply acquire funds. We have $20.
>>890885
My friends. You guys are all invited!
>>
>>890885
newt said (she?) would need to grab invitations
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>>890933
Then we'll need to spend all 20 of them them wisely, TO THE DOLLAR GENERAL!
>>
>>890933

Make use of our money the best we can!

And we will be at your party, but we WILL be fashionably late. (1 minute after the date)
>>
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if you see a group of people dressed like pic related, invite them to your party, newt!
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>>890850
I made you a card Newt! I hope you like it!
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>>890962
Do NOT invite those people Newt!
>>
I drew
>>
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>>890945
>>890961
Alright we're on our way to the Dollar General Store!
>>890969
Aww thank you I'll put it on my fridge when I get home!
>>
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>>890933
>You guys are all invited!
>>
I've also prepared a card for you.
>>
Here's my life savings, use it to buy streamers
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>>891055

Oooh, what goodies do you see being sold at the store?
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>>891055
Have a safe trip and don't get molested
>>
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phew we finally made it to the Dollar general store! And it doesn't seem to crowded today either! What an easy trip this will be!
>>
>>891203
Watch out for that shady character to the left, she may distract us from our party supplies quest!
>>
>>891203
Right on!
Let's go on in, no sense in getting side-tracked or distracted by the local talent
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>>891203

That lady over there looks bored. Maybe you should invite her to your birthday party!
>>
>>891203
Check out that lady
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>>891203
oooooh who's that slutty cat girl over there by the car

be careful, newt
>>
>>891221
Good call, actually
I retract >>891217
Let's not be rude when we have the chance to meet a new friend!
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>>891085
I love this card. Newts are lucky bastards, I would have loved to die at 20 and not rot up until 70.
>>
Happy Birthday Newt!
>>
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>>891251
you shouldn't feel that way
>>
>>891269
>>891251
>>891085
>20

r.i.p newt
>>
>>891298
I can agree though, fuck living
>>
>>891251
>>891309
You must try to enjoy life until it's end, then you must try to enjoy whatever may follow.
>>
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>>891203
Oh boy newt... I think some good things are coming!
>>
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>>891221
>>891222
>>891232
New tells the cat woman about her party

> "Well ain't you dawlin'. Sure. I'll come to yo' pawty. I'll even have my tom drop us off~ no sense lugging all that stuff by foot yeh?"

Newt now has +1 guests.
>>
>>891324
When you have went through your own personal hell, you do a radical change.
I was wealthy, then I lost everything.
How would you feel if that happened to you? From having a big house, a big bed, lots of stuff and games, food always in your plate, to living in the streets? I was lucky to escape that, but I realized that the fragility of balance is so immense that I am living in fear everyday now that maybe the next time I don't get so lucky.
>>
>>891386
Awesome! Give her a high five as thanks.
>>
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Alright. Newt is +1 happier since inviting the cat woman outside.

And she's already found the cupcakes!
>>
>>891404
Sick, what flavors do they have?
>>
>>891404
Alright! Lets get a couple, but don't blow the whole budget in one go.
Drinks are next, gotta have good drinks for a party.
>>
>>891386

Remember to hand her the cute invitation showing the time and place!

And let's get to buying, we don't want to disappoint our new friend-to-be! Maybe we'll find more party-goers in the store!!
>>
>>891404
See if you have any money Newt.
Check for your personnel belongings.
See if your a male or female.
Get some sodas, meet some potential friends for the party.
Get the app for friends.
>>
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>>891395
materialism is destroying society!
>>
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>>891386
>>
>>891404
ALWAYS get more cupcakes than you have guests, just to be safe.
>>
>>891427
>.jpg

kek
>>
>>891395
im sorry you went through that anon, i hope your life improves/stays good
>>
>>891427
>Materialism is destroying society
If you are so against it, how the hell are you here posting and not living in a fucking cave? Don't be an hypocrite, anon.
>>
>>891404

Remember to get some vanilla cupcakes, there's always that one person who only eats vanilla.

It's probably you.
>>
>>891462
He accepts material items, but does not put too much value into them.
>>
Can we get porn of the newt after the SFW story is done for?
>>
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Newt purchases 6 chocolate cupcakes and 6 vanilla cupcakes.
4 DOLLARS has been rounded out of the budget.
>>
>>891462
we can do everything, but we can do our best, like getting rid of your cellphone. If you hate life why don't you kill yourself? If people don't like fast food why do they keep going to mc donalds every sunday?

we arent perfect be we can do our best!
>>
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holy fuck your newt art style is cute as fuck bro
>>
>>891514
Great! Now for some koolaid to wash it down with!
>>
>>891514
Let's get that juice, wish Capri sun was on that list
>>
>>891530
corrected version
>we cant do everything, but we can do our best
>we arent perfect but we can do our best!
>>
>>891514

Now buy the big bottle of juice, it's cheaper than small bottles.

And when you go for party stuff, get the cheap combo pack with basically all you need in it.
>>
>>891514
Buy 3 1 liter sodas of 3 different varieties, Spuds Vanilla Enhance Soda Pop, Orange County Sasparilla. And Professor Pep.
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>>891514
woah thats like 34¢ per cupcake! that's a great deal!
>>
>>891514
maybe milk?

milk goes good with cupcakes
>>
>>891573
ᵃᶫˢᵒ ᶜᵃᵗˢ ᶫᶦᵏᵉ ᵐᶦᶫᵏ
>>
>>891055

The jankiness is my favorite part of this.
>>
>>891580
niiice
>>
I wonder if pepe lives in newt's town
>>
get some catnip no harm in drugging the cat woman :^)
>>
>>891500
>>891530
Being poor teached me to not depend on material things.
However I do enjoy having good stuff like everybody else, I am not addicted to it like before.
Still living in the streets and ghetto really fucks you up, if you knew better before.
The guys that always live and die there have it much easier.
>>
>>891600
No no Newt! Not for drugging Kitty...

Get it because she likes catnip, all cats like catnip
>>
>>891596
Newt call Pepe and invite him to the party!
>>
>>891639
Don't invite Pepe, he doesn't even like parties like the basement dweller he is.
>>
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>>891424
See if there's a young girl with green hair and 4 tiny pigtails in the store.
>>
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>>891639

Please invite him, he probably won't come from shyness, but he can at least know his existence means something to someone else.
>>
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Holy cow! Kolaid is like 10 cents a pack! Newt does the kolaid dance! Press Kolaid man! Bless america!
>>
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>>891712
>that projection
>>
>>891712
How can she invite a dead man
>>
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>>891715
awye
>>
>>891715
Hooray for capitalism!
>>
>>891715
OH YEAH!
>>
>>891715
hell yeah, buddy
welcome to the land of the free

now we just gotta get hats and streamers

Once all that's settled we can see what the dollar general has available in the way of dragon dildos

We should get a horse one instead, if they've got one at an affordable price
>>
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>>891706
>>891712
and also what's his face? jack off? warm fuz?
>>
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> not Capri sun
>>
>>891717

That was the joke, thanks.
>>
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>>891715
>>
>>891738
>horse one

We can just burn the money if we want to waste it like THAT.

Go for exotic.

Get an uncut human dildo.
>>
>>891715
>that split frame of cloaca

Getting a little too excited there, tone it down, party time is later, at home, where you're not in public.
>>
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Found the party hats. They're a little pricey...but we still have 10 dollars left! Enough to get streamers.
But we'll see how much a dragon dildo costs
.
>>
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>>891811
Sell yourself off for money.
>MAKE HER JOIN THE PROSTITUTION RING.
>>
>>891811
It's dragon time
>>
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>>891828
no
>>
>>891811
>a dragon dildo
most important item
>>
>>891828
Anon please, no one should have to work on their birthday

She can join the prostitution ring later

Speaking of, only two of those hats are accounted for, we need to hurry up so we have time to make some friends
>>
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>>891715
>>891779
dont listen to this guy, kool aids kick-ass!
>>
>>891845
Well, we're all invited soooo
>>
>>891811

Get the dollar dildo, sold for only a dollar.

>>891842
>Housepets

Goddamn, next to Freefall in damn that's old.
>>
>>891828
i think she already has a job
>>
>>891872
>Freefall
that is way older!

and both comics are still going strong
>>
>>891890
>Freefall started in 1998
>only about two weeks maybe another has actually passed in the comic
>http://freefall.purrsia.com/ffdex.htm

"Are they still on Namek" has nothing on Freefall pacing.
>>
Thread dead? Maybe her 20 years are up.
>>
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>>891811
See if a gal named Whorb's in the store! She maybe shopping, too!
>>
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>>892026
hope not
>>
D E A D T H R E A D
>>
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NO PORN?! NO BIRTHDAY PARTY?!
>>
>>892151
But that's the 2 reasons I came here!
>>
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>>891811
>>892026
>>892051

Let's have a Whorb Mini-Thread to pass the time while we wait for Newt.
>>
>>892228
NO WHORE ORB WE JUST WANT NEW NEWT
>>
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I think OP wasn't satisfied with the attention he got.
>>
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>>892228

==>

You are now Whorb.

You're interests include deep dark sexual fantasys, pleasuring others, and getting some milk. You have just picked out some nice Vitamin-D milk at the Dollar General Store.

What do you do next?

(>>892259 And no, I am NOT a whore!)
>>
>>892364

Ignore the dollar dildos and pay for your goods, attempt to barter with cashier.
>>
>>892364
Whorb is a whore.
>whore + orb
>>
>>892364
Fuck a dog
>>
>>892353
Y tho, I need more Newt in my life
>>
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>>892364
>>892385
You walk to the check out and encounter an intense looking individual.

>I'LL CHECK OUT YOUR ITEMS!
he says

>>892388
Unfortunately there are no dogs in sight.
*Sigh* You are quite partial to dogs though.

(>>892387 Wellllll... okay i guess i would suck anything given the chance...)
>>
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>>892630
GET WHORB TO FIND OUT WHAT THE FUCK NEWTS DOING
>>
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>>892630
>>892706
You mean that atractive looking newt (You are quite partial to newts) over there? She appears to be doing... nothing. Huh.

In fact I think she hasn't moved at all in a while. Is because she's cold blooded and out of the sunlight? Hmmmm....
>>
>>892778
Perhaps time froze for her.
It is such a shame.
>>
>>893312
It's probably a good thing, though. Any second out of her short life she can gain is worth while.
>>
>>893333
Is it really good to gain more time if you can't do shit while being frozen? All you can do is LET IT GO
>>
Newt probably fell asleep. Maybe it's a narcoleptic
>>
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Did somebody say I was having an adventure?
>>
>>892778
Somebody help her!
>>
OP probably fell asleep or something like that. I hope that they're back soon.
>>
>>894213
Yeah "fell asleep"
RIP
>>
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>>894243
Or he just quit.
I mean isn't like he was getting paid or something.
>>
>>891715
Saving that image bc it is so cute
>>
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Oh dear....it seems that newt fell asleep while picking streamers out.

Guys! You gotta yell really loud to wake her up....
>>
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>>898364
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>
>>898364
WAKE THE FUCK UP
>>
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>>898385
>>898394
Great job anons! Newt is now awake...but she dropped all the confetti and streamers. she had gotten before she fell asleep.
>>
>>898497
Need some help picking them up?
>>
>>898497
Bend over... And pick them up
>>
>>898497
Did we miss the party?
>>
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>>898516
>>898558
okay...
>>898669
No. we just need to get the dildo and then meet our cat friend.
>>
>>891639
he needs a invite
>>
>>891639
I N V I T E P E P E
>>
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>>892778
>>893622
>>898497

Woah! I guess that takes care of that!
>>
>>892630
>the man at checkout
TOPKEK
>>
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All the streamers and confetti are picked up...but now for the decorative dragon dildo...it's a little pricey...but there are other choices in the adult section. A human uncut penis....a little vibe....the dog dick is way out of the question...and there's a mystery box....
>>
>>899374
ask about the mystery box :DDD
>>
>>899374
>decorative

Also invite pepe
>>
>>899374
Might as well take a chance and buy the mystery box
>>
>>899374
Always go with the mystery box.
>>
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>>899374
I'll take what's in the box!
>>
anybody else reminded of this?
https://youtu.be/dT1zWaFjslg?t=36s
>>
Thread dead again?
>>
>>901229
She is sampling the wares
>>
>>901325
(insert meme face here)
>>
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rest in pieces

newt
>>
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>>899041
>$2.50 FOR THE MILK! DID YOU WANT ANYTHING ELSE?! I'LL BAG YOUR THINGS!!
He says
>>
>>901882
Go away Whorb the Whore Orb
>>
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>>901882
At least practice more your drawing first.
>>
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Certified first Newt R34
>>
>>902801
Not yet, anon.
>>
>>902801
Feels Bad Man
>>
4 H O U R S
>>
>>899374
But what about the anal beads? And, you can afford both the dollar dilldo and the mystery box. Twice the fun.
>>
5 H O U R S
>>
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(after a short nap, we're back!! sorry guys.)

Newt obtains the MYSTERY BOX. And because she invited the adult section manager and his octofriend to her party the string of beads was thrown in for free! So lucky.
>>
>>904010
You should use the beads as a necklace for now, you'll look cool.
>>
>>904010
Also open the box, naturally.
>>
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>>904050
They look great on me!
>>904062
And inside the mystery box....

Next anon will tell me!
VVVVVVVV
>>
Lizard ______
>>
>>904080
20 dollars! And a crumpled up piece of paper, idk what's on it
>>
>>904080
The perfect dildo!
>>
>>904088
Lizard Pheromones
>>
12 cupcakes is a lot for 3 party goers, you gluttonous newt you. You cant possibly eat them all between the 3 of you, can you? And everyone knows they are no good stale.
>>
>>904113
anon we are invited, too
>>
>>904088
Pheromones
>>
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>>904088
20 Lizard Dollards! And a crumpled up paper! WOW! what a good box!
>>
>>904138
WOAH, the anal beads can turn invisible?
>>
>>904155
Maybe (she?) is hiding them up her bum.
>>
>>904155
Saving them up for the party
>>
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>>904138
The paper is a map! But no time for treasure hunting guys!
>>
>>904178
O dang, field trip after the party perhaps?
>>
>>904138
What a lucky Newt you are
>>
>>904178
Maybe that could be something to do with the party once you guys finish off the cupcakes and do the... other stuff, too.
>>
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whoops the beads fell off! I guess I can't wear them around my neck....let's go meet our cat friend!
>>
>>904215
To the pussy mobile!
>>
>>904215
You should give them to your new friend as a gift!
>>
>>904229
No man, she has to save them for the party!
>>
I hope the exchange rate from Lizard dollars to regular dollars is really good.

Heck, even 1:1 means Newt is back to $20.
>>
>>904244
I'm guessing the exchange rate from LD to USA is 1:1 since both of their presidents are reptiles
>>
>>904262
USD*
>>
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>>904235
>>
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Newt with all her bags, the map, and the 20 lizard dollars go out to meet her cat friend who is just finishing her cigarette.

> "Done shopping doll? Ah'ight hop in and we'll get ya home~"
>>
>>904310
Dang, she must've been waiting for a long time.
>>
>>904310
I ship them
>>
>>904310
What a nice offer, accept it.
>>
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>>904310
>Those hips
>>
>>904310
GOD DAMN IT NEWT, YOU BARELY KNOW HER! DONT YOU KNOW NOT TO ACCEPT RIDES FROM STRANGERS?

>>904327
Please do.
>>
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>>904349
>implying you don't want to get fucked by a hot cat lady
Get off /trash/
>>
>>904378
The fucking part is fine. I just dont want her to end up dead in a ditch somewhere.
>>
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does newt have a gender?
>>
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>Newt gets in the car. Finally she gets a proper introduction.

> "Well dawlin', I'm Felicity. And this is my Dawlin' husband, Tom~. Do you need any help setting up for your party?"
>>
>>904413
>she
>she
>she
>she
I think it's a guy
>>
>>904413
I'm going to say that newt is a lady
>>
>>904427
Xhe's genderfluid. check your privilege cis-scum
>>
>>904423
Yo is that Digby
Also are you tall enough to put up the streamers? And someone's gotta hold the beads.
>>
>>904423
Tom seems nice.
>>
>>904423
That belt tho
>>
>>904423
Do we have music for this party?
>>
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>>902050
How's this? Is this better?
>>
>>904423
Is that tom guy invited too?
>>
>>904499
He better be for driving newt and all the stuff
>>
THIS IS A FUCKING GLORIOUS THREAD 11/10 I LOVE /trash/
>>
>>904492
Nah m8, we need some chicken breasts, eggs & panko crumbs too.
>>
newt full color artbook when?
>>
>>904492
A bit.
>>
>>904541
Newt animation soon
>>
>>904541
this, would love newt forever
>>
>>904551
When***
>>
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Oh noooo Newt has fallen asleep from the car ride!

>>904541
(On that note, We'll start color pictures for the party~
But for please forgive me as a faggot OP who has to sleep.)
>>
>>904567
Oh shit don't get murdered while you sleep
>>
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>>904567
Sleep tight Newt
>>
>>904567
Maybe the cat lady will notice it and do something uncomfortable to her D:
>>
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>>904567
Good night, anon. For real though, you draw a hell of a cute newt. And so fast, too. It takes me forever to draw, and it dosent look half as good as your stuff. I envy your ability, and hope to see more of newt's adventure soon.
>>
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>>904529
>>904549
Alright then, what does Whorb do next?
>>
>>904567
do you have a place where you post art?

your style is really cute

it's cool if you wanna stay anon as well
>>
>>904637
she gets her cock mongled
>>
>>904637
She should probably gtfo of there. That guys looks intense.
>>
>>904637
I dunno, maybe some drinks.
>>
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>>904567
stop sleeping you damn newt, you already slept in the store. im not gonna let you end up with a missing kidney or mugged because you wanted to fall a sleep in a strangers car.
>>
>>904637
Follow that (platonically) cute newt and see what she's up to. I think she went in THAT direction.
>>
Oh god newt, they ARE GOING TO STEAL THE MAP. You need to get the toy before them! What if its something awesome?
>>
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>>904644
As Whorb puts her change away and picks up her bag to leave suddenly the checkout clerk lurches forward and starts slowly reach for Whorb!
>>904650
Whorb is filled with the sudden urge to leave this place and never come back!
>>904652
But she needs to get... just... one... more... soda...
>>
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>>904822
FIGHT, POKEMON/RPG STYLE MOTHERFUCKER
>>
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when do the lewd activities start?
>>
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>>904955
hopefully soon
>>
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>>904842
STRIFE!!

You engage the Clerk Mongler!

What action do you take?
>>
>>905144
Suicide
>>
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>>905144
pull down his fly and siphon the semen out of his reproductive organ
>>
>>905144
Attack!
>>905191
Zozzle
>>
>>905144
Attack
>>905191
Zozzle
>>
>>904567
>>
>>904567
Sleep tight, Newt.
>>
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>>905144
>>905191
Suddenly your flooded with dark unspeakable thoughts!
>>
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>>906310
Your filled with so much despair you almost loose the will to stand!

You comfort yourself the only way you know how!
>>
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>>906319
>>905221
Sex!
>>
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>>906324
WHAT THE FUCK!?
>>
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>>906332
Dazed, you have no idea how to process this information!
>>
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>>906338
>>905222
So you punch it!
>>
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>>906349
Your opponent reels in horror and stunned amazement!
>>
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>>906355
>>905237
So you punch it again!
>>
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>>906360
Cock Mongler, Clerk Mongler, whatever his name was is now dead.

Congratulations!

You win the battle!
>>
Wew, what's happening in this thread?
>>
>>906380
newt is sleeping and some anon is being irrelevant
>>
awaiting newt ,3, you'll be back... they always come back... dont they?
>>
>>906370
the ass is uncovered, rape him now!
>>
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Neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwt
>>
Everyone is still alive right?
>>
>>907104
Nah, I'm chillin' in purgatory right now.
>>
>>907125
Oh, ok anon. Just checking up on everyone, I care about all of you.
>>
>"Wanna come to my party, anon? It will be just the two of us..."
>>
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>>906370
>>904751
Ah yes, that newt. She does feel compelling.
>>
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>>907729
>>906527
But something else... beckons.
>>
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>>907741
But how to proceed? I don't have the right equipment.

Hmmmmm...
>>
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>>907763
You strap the broom and bungie cord to your body.

There, that Should do it.
>>
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>>907782
>>
>>891386
Wait, I know that cat.
>>
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>>904423
Felicity you left town for this? I thought we had something special!
Thread replies: 279
Thread images: 102
Thread DB ID: 387041



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