Hello ladies and gentlemen.
Today, we will be embarking on a heroic quest of three perverted knights.
Now, you may be asking yourself, "What the fuck is this trash?"
You can find out more about it here: https://1d4chan.org/wiki/Towergirls
In the meantime, our heroes today are the heroic
You can find the chart containing these heroes over at >>1074138
IMPORTANT: When asked to roll for a check, just reply to the post with the word Roll or some variation at the start of it. The last 2 digits of your post are your roll. 00 is 100, low rolls are usually bad, high rolls are usually good, and dubs, trips, etc. will cause the gods to throw things more in your favor.
Our tale begins on the road, the heroes are each traveling in a cart, enchanted by the Great Wizard of the kingdom.
The reason? The horrible Dragon Princess has stolen 18 fair maidens from around the lands and hidden them deep within her lair.
Hundreds of knights from hundreds of kingdoms have been drafted to hunt down and save the princesses. Find the lair, save the princesses, slay the dragon if there's time, and return to their new home as unscathed as possible. Will our heroes be the first to find the lair? Probably. Will they die? Probably. Will it matter? Probably not.
Three carts, hitched together, being dragged by a trio of pack mules trundles down the wooded vale. Upon each sits one of three recently conscripted knights. The first is the valiant Dog Knight, renowned for his rugged good lucks and impressive fashion sense. The second, Lantern Knight, whose radiant armour and flail guide the way. In the last cart, Kobold Knight is sleeping, his powerful crossbow beneath his tiny frame.
Not much is currently occurring and the story will continue in the next post. Feel free to make a Sense roll for any of the 3 knights, you never know when danger will strike.
(So these guys, huh? Sounds interesting)
Roll for Lantern knight sensing danger with his lantern.
>Stuck on Laptop again
In his dreams, Kobold Knight sees a looming darkness before him, it smiles gently before sailing down and swallowing him whole, the shock waking the tiny knight, flustered and surprised.
(It was voted on over in the other thread in a strawpoll, something like 6-1-1.)
Swinging his lantern in a great arc about the little convoy, light flickers off a myriad of things in the forest, not quite enough to make out what they are, but enough to know there's *something* there.
Lantern Knight begins to gently hum, a barely audible tune as the carts trundle onward.
Looking about with the keen senses of his heritage, Dog Knight notices a distinct lack of really anything. There is no wind, no noise, nothing but the mules and the cart wheels. It seems everything is in perfect harmony.
Time passes, Lantern Knight calms down, Kobold Knight calms down as well, and not much actually happens.
Dog Knight remains vigilant, holding the same position of a vigilant watch dog at the front of the caravan.
The sun breaks over the treetops as the heroes exit the Vale. The landscape abruptly changes to that of a vast dustbowl.
There is no possible way they can miss the Lair if they find it here!
Along the road, a gift basket is seen just sitting there.
The carts trundle to a stop just before it.
Do the heroes dare look into the basket, and if so, who?
Also, chocolate dicks page for loot later.
Kobold Knight, loving any chance at more loot, hops off his cart before any of the other Knights can.
"About damn time! My ass was chafing on that cart!"
As he picks up the basket, he finally notices it's attached by a string leading into a hole int he ground, a whirring sound occurs as he pulls the basket up. However, being so abysmally short, he doesn't bring the basket high enough to fully trigger the trap.
The ground beneath his feet is now tilted slightly to one side, leading to what is presumably a death pit, but otherwise, he is fine and pulls the cover off the basket.
Inside is a note.
"If you enjoy surprises, you'll love what I've done with the place! I got my sister to help me remodel." -D.P.
Kobold Knight, dejected, walks back to the cart and shows the other two the note, of which Dog Knight can't read it and Lantern Knight lets out a small note of concern.
The band travels onward. Something begins to peak in the distance, a tower of some description, perfect cobbles in a circle about the base, reaching approximately 250 feet into the air.
An ounce of excitement fills the party as they mush the pack mules onward.
Roll for sense, it seems the Dragon Princess could have laid any number of traps.
Dog Knight, ever vigilant looks and smells for anything deadly. As it turns out, the mules dragging the cart chose that same time to let out a torrent of gas from the oats they ate while Kobold Knight was dealing with the basket.
Dog Knight is stunned from the atrocious smell, now laying in the cart, unable to move. He'll be fine soon enough.
"From the heavens above to the hells below, evil and darkness, heed my lantern's glow!"
Lantern Knight casts an aura of Detection. As it stands, nothing seems to be dangerous nearby, but it may help later.
>WE'RE GOING 88 MILES PER HOUR NOW.
Calling upon his education in the knighting process, the Kobold begins looking for every little hint of danger, yet nothing shows up. Until they find safe haven, he shall stand guard, the Gods upon his side, for now.
The caravan finally reaches the base of the tower, unscathed. It seems they are in-fact, the first to arrive.
To the East and West, two more towers loom, the barest hint of more towers beyond curving North.
Time passes as the party sets up camp, letting the mules graze, tents ready for them and their soon to be saved princesses.
They sleep in peace, unscathed by the dangers of the plain.
You now face options in the morning.
The first Tower stands before you, a heavy oaken door at its base. Do you all go in, split up and search the grounds, or something else?
Before setting out into the Lair of Dragon Princess, the party decides it best to be aware of everything important.
Kobold Knight checks the door and the nearby stones. Sure enough, a tripwire is found at the base of the door, a bucket of hot tar is sitting a few feet above it, and a familiar scent is wafting down from the window far above at the top of the tower.
Dog Knight sniffs all about the tower and the only thing out of place is the scent of perfume, sex, and Kobolds, not just the Knight, either.
Lantern Knight still has one action before the next turn starts. He can attempt to defuse the traps if he feels up to the challenge, or step valiantly into the tower, unerred by the traps.
Funny. I'll just go with 46.
Stepping up to the door, Lantern pops the tripwire with a swipe of his flail, hot tar pouring down onto the ground. A batch of feathers follows soon after, getting stuck in the goop.
As far as the party can tell, it is now safe to enter the tower.
Without another though, the party opens the door, which opens out, for some reason, and steps inside.
To say it is illogical is an understatement. The entire first floor is filled with snakes. Just hundreds if not thousands of snakes in a slightly depressed floor space, a stairway up on the right, and a stairway down on the left.
Our heroes must now either devise a path across or just wade through snakes.
>You may go up the tower or down into the basement.
>Currently, you have enough food to last you approximately your whole adventure, but not much else. Kobold Knight's crossbow, plenty of bolts, Lantern Knight's candles, and Dog Knight's Sewing Kit.
"I am not versed in the ways of the parsal tongue. If ye think it right, I guess It wouldn't hurt to try..."
>Insert hissing noises
>Nothing really happens, the snakes look at the iron-clad bowman quizzically before going back to doing fuck-all nothing.
"Stand back, Sir Kobold. I shall light our way!"
Lantern Knight then swings at the snakes with his burning lamp. They seem to be getting a tad annoyed. Some of the reptiles are also now on fire.
"Allow me, brethren. I shall show these snakes who the master is."
A powerful bark emits from the depths of Dog Knight's throat.
Almost every snake in the room looks up, mouths agape. The ensuing scene is a comedy as snakes swarm down the stairwell, fearful of the demon dog that has entered their domain. Just about half of the snakes catch fire as they flee downwards.
It is now safe to proceed up or down. The smell of charred scales fills the air.
Dog down, rest up it is.
In his travels, Dog Knight has sampled all manner of delicacies, but he is happy to eat just about anything. In this case, charred snake as he descends into the depths below.
The next floor down appears to be a shrine of some description, the floor is littered with well-done reptiles. The Shrine is a large statue sitting in a throne-like chair, a sign next to it says "Sit on me."
At the same time, Lantern and Kobold Knight ascend to the next floor. This one appears to be quite formal. Dressers and shelves line the sides. In the center, a dining table is in place. At it, three Goblins and an Orc dressed in Maid's Uniforms and Sundresses are having tea and discussing what sounds like princesses.
Dog Knight is free to do as he pleases, descending deeper, ascending, although he has no reason to do so, or investigating the altar.
Kobold and Lantern are now just barely in the shadow of a dresser at the top of the staircase. They can either fight, talk to the group, sneak by, walk by, or listen in on the conversation.
Just got back.
"Hmph. The nerve of some reptiles. Fine!"
It is at this point that the poor Lantern Knight opens his flail and sticks his entire head in. It is now lit ablaze. Standing tall, he walks out into the main area, the Orc and company looking on with perplexed bemusement.
"'Ey, bud. You need a glass of water, ya look a little hot headed." -Goblin #1
They really don't seem to mind that much.
The Kobold Knight steps forth to join his friend. And is genuinely feeling a bit perturbed by the Orc in a maid's uniform. "So, why are you lovely ladies all dressed up, if you don't mind me askin'?"
The Orc glares down at the diminutive arbalest and says "Boss's orders. But to be perfectly honest, he also said to 'kill all trespassers', but he's a jackass, so we've been sitting here playing card games. Feel free to keep goin'. Princess is 3 floors up."
In a slight episode of confusion, Lantern has his toasty head extinguished and the duo is escorted upstairs. This floor is a sea of pressure plates. There is almost no room between each and there is no telling what each one will do.
Lantern Knight's Trap aura sets off an audible "ding!" over each actual trap, a small spectral candle now floating above them. The false plates are left unmarked. This seems like such an easy task. Shall the duo cross?
Poor Dog Knight is still down in the basement dealing with the Altar.
Now one sign richer, Dog Knight stands around, wondering what to do.
Kobold Knight goes back downstairs and asks in his most polite voice:
"You mind if I have some 'a your maid outfits?"
The Orc just looks at him, strips the nearest Goblin and chucks the outfits at him, garters and all. "Thanks, sweetheart."
He is now back upstairs standing before the plethora of pressure plates. A treasure chest is visible across the room.
>52 dog pickup
Crossing the sea of plates, the duo come out unscathed. To their left is the next stairwell up, 2 floors to the princess. To the right, a chest full of loot.
Dog Knight, deciding it was safe, sits upon the stone giant's lap.
A powerful voice coming from seemingly everywhere states: "What is your greatest desire, hound?"
Now hold on.
This could be a monkey's paw deal. Better be safe and ask for the dragon's favorite food. Because it could help in rescuing the princesses.
And lead to our greatest desire - having a princess call us a good dog
"May I ask again?" Dog Knight says, tail wagging fervently.
"Of course you may, I am a kind God who only seeks your benefit." The voice replied.
"May I receive a gift of the dragon princess's favorite food?"
A long "hmm" fills the air.
"I regret to inform you again, you already have her favorite food."
"Then, who.. are you?" Dog Knight inquires.
"I am Elt, God of Masonry and Construction. I hoped I may thank you for keeping me company so long, but it appears, I am unable. I am most humbly sorry."
Reminder: Lantern and Kobold are standing <15 feet from a treasure chest AND the next staircase.
Dog Knight is now mildly dejected.
Kobold Knight saunters up to the chest, sets his crossbow down and says, "Well, let's see what we got here!"
The chest contains the following:
1. A shitty helmet.
2. An exceptionally shitty sword.
3. A small pile of tattered rags, stored for Dog Knight later.
4. A chestpiece that is literally turning to dust.
5. What appears to be a magical tome.
6. An exceedingly rare item!
Please roll for your tome and your rare item, respectively.
Dog Knight, exceptionally comfortable upon the sea of Elt decides to ask further. "Godly figure, what is your greatest desire?"
Elt is silent for some time until finally, "That is simple: To see a kingdom raised in my honour. Out in the great grasslands, a legendary kingdom incapable of being breached, haven of many, defender of all. Why do you ask, Pup?"
Kobold Knight, excited at what he sees whips out a Wand of Light!
"Look here, Lantern! A Wand of Light, haha! With this, I can see anything!"
Lantern Knight smiles gently and says "Firstly, that's just a Flashlight, one of the newfangled techs the Mice came up with a few years ago. Second, how could you possibly need to see into darkness with ME around?"
At this point, Lantern is posing dramatically, the whole room aglow.
"Oh. Well then, let's go look at the spellbook!"
"Why, because I, too, wish to build a kingdom. A kingdom for me and my followers to live and prosper in for many generations to come. It is why I am questing here in the first place!" Dog Knight exclaimed, hopping up.
In response, Elt said "I see... And you believe you could carry out this task... I somewhat have my doubts."
Dog Knight stands up from the statue and states "If you do not believe me, then I shall prove it to you!," storming down the steps to the next floor.
The Valiant Pup now finds himself on the landing of what appears to be a wide storage room. The stairs down are sure to be on the other side.
The book is entitled: 'Dear God, Why?'
As to what it does, neither hero is sure. It contains a wide variety of images featuring nightmare demons that would drive mortals insane. Perhaps it summons a nightmare, who can say?
The duo makes their way up the stairway, the next floor ALSO appears to be a storage room of some description, but the room is also exceptionally dark, despite having a window with sun streaming in.
Dog Knight spends a considerable amount of time scrounging around in the storeroom.
After some time, he finds upon a small cache of gold hidden behind a large pile of bricks.
Further on, he finds something rare upon an altar in the shape of a hammer, with a note: "At least I can offer you this for your troubles."
Roll for it now.
It's a noose. The knot seems to be magically bound, the end frayed to hell, but large enough to fit your head through. A bubble of air materializes and pops, odd.
Dog Knight is quite skeptical, but proceeds to the next floor down, stowing the Rope for later.
The next floor down seems completely normal. Stone brick walls, stone brick floors, two collapsed tunnels to the left and right, and one tunnel leading forward, a bright orange glow emanating from deep within the downward sloping shaft.
(The noose is too short to tie up and subsequently hang yourself with.)
The room and hall down are mostly normal, a few loose bricks and such, but nothing deadly. The entrance lets out into a massive underground cavern filled to the brim with treasure as far as the eye can see, rising like small mountains in gold, jewels, and treasures. One could spend a hundred years and not sort all of it.
This is clearly the Dragon Princesses' lair. Realizing this system may be bigger than expected, Dog Knight begins drawing a map (See next post.)
(Also see next post for potential responses.)
>Gold lines indicate entrance exit relationships.
Dog Knight is currently in the southern end of the Lair.
To the left is a large pile of treasure coming to a point facing north.
To the right is a large piles of treasure that curves around to the right, concealing something behind the heap. Ahead is a small crossroads with routes leading north, west, and east. That's all the poor pup can make out.
>Kobold and Lantern are in the upper Store room of the first tower
>Dog Knight has just entered the lair
"No earthly idea where she is."
"Quite the pile of supplies they got here." Remarked the Lantern Knight as they crossed the path. "Yep." Kobold, replied, somehow more unnerved than Lantern Knight, having caught sight of what appeared to be an assortment of dragon dildos on a shelf.
Chains, whips, a myriad of binding tools, chastity belts, and a collection of hammers and nails, which made him wonder what kinda of twisted fuck would need this kind of stuff.
The final stair case is a rather short one to the next floor. They now stand before an unguarded door, the sound of whip cracking and heavy moaning emanating from within. Who should go first?
Keeping an eye on everything around him, Dog Knight makes his way to the right along the treasure heap. It keeps bending until he comes into a tiny alcove containing what appears to be a Dwarf... Princess. Dog Knight made sure to mark everything on his map. Looking more closely, it is definitely the Dwarf Princess, crown, tiny stature, and bronze armour all in-tact.
She seems to be asleep, bound and gagged.
A sense of excitement fills the Dog Knight at the prospect of finally saving his first princess.
What should the Duo and Dog Knight do next, respectively?
Here's the DPI square btw.
Thinking it a good idea, Kobold Knight drags Lantern back to the store room and has his strap on a chastity belt. Kobold Knight is reminded of his nightmare dream from 2 nights ago of being devoured whole by a titan.
A sense of deep foreboding fills the duo as they return to the door. Lantern takes the initiative and opens the door slowly, ever so slowly. Inside is quite a sight: It's the Human Princess hung upside down from the ceiling, buck naked, arms and legs tied up getting whipped viciously by a machine spinning a Cat 'o Nine-Tails.
There is nobody else in the room and she seems to be in a state of pure terror and bliss. The duo is dumbfounded by the sight, having never seen any form of kink before.
Gently, ever so gently, Dog Knight lays down his mace and frisbees and sits cross-legged behind the bound Dwarf.
He then proceeds to lick the back of her head, not wanting to shock her awake.
Sure enough, it emits a gentle sound from her mouth, a mumbled "Five more minutes..."
Another lick she says a tad forcefully, "Down boy, I said 5 minutes."
Once more and sure enough, she's awake. "Fine, you bugger, I'm getting up, just *yawn* stop licking me. I want my hair nice for today's ceremonies."
It is about that time she opens her eyes and notices that she isn't in-fact in the royal Bedchamber, but in the DP's Lair.
"Oh right... then... who's licking me?"
Dog Knight gently side-steps around the Dwarf Princess into view and says "It is I, the valiant Dog Knight!"
The Dwarf takes a moment's pause before stating: "Oh good. I'm going back to sleep. Carry me out of here, will ya?"
Well, I guess she doesn't mind being saved by a dog.
Now the Dog Knight has claimed his first Princess and Kobold + Lantern are standing in awe before the perversion of the Human Princess.
No. Her moans are open to the air.
Almost in a trance-like state, Lantern Knight walks over to the whipping machine and unplugs it from the wall.
It whirs down to a stop and Human Princess is instantly annoyed. "I TOLD YOU FUCKS TO LEAVE ME ALONE!"
This is when she notices it isn't her guard, but rather Knights.
"Oh, ah, hello there... brave Knights. Fancy meeting you here... in... my... room..." She looks away, embarrassed infinitely.
"You can uh, cut me down and uh, 'save' me now. Sorry for the shock, I get pretty lonely up here. My clothes are in the dresser over yonder." She swings her head towards a dresser against the back wall.
In the dresser are actually a collection of costumes. You may now pick the one you give her, original or anything else.
She's asleep again, Pup.
Have her wear this
Welp, the pic related was the point, so I'll just throw her in the Nightie.
It is at this time, all three Knights decide it is best to return to the campground for the day.
Dog Knight safely carries the Dwarf Princess back, arriving first.
Kobold and Lantern Knight cut down, dress, and escort the Princess down, the guards happy to see her go.
Now everyone is back at camp.
Just as the Duo finds themselves back in camp, Dwarf Princess has awoken and says to the brave Dog Knight "Valiant fighter, will you accept my gift?"
She is currently holding out a Dowry in each hand. Dog Knight may take either from >>1114894
Or both. Or decline both in favor of those to come. You choice will impact several factors now and later.
"Oh! That reminds me! Good Knights, which of you will lay claim to saving me? As I can only give my gifts to one of you..." Exclaimed the Human Princess to Kobold and Lantern.
If the walls are made of cloth, yeah. You can see through them. And EXCEPTIONALLY thin walls, but otherwise, no.
Also, someone has to claim the Human Princess first. Kobold or Lantern.
You said "or anything else" so I went with that.
Anyways, take the brandy from Dwarf Princess to give to Dog Knight and let Kobold lay claim to both Human Princess and the P'orc Bone
It's alright, I was a bit vague. The point was to update her little square. And I can't exactly do that with the Animal Crossing slut.
>71 overrides 60
"I shall take that Brandy, fair lass!" and with a swift paw, downs the entire jug.
Dog Knight has gained the power to see through all cloth!
"I do hope you enjoy it, Dog, I know I will."
On the other end of the camp, "Now see here, short stuff, I have lit the way and am a HUMAN! I lay claim to this lass and her pillows!"
Kobold Knight caps Lantern in his knees with his ballista, blocked by the Bright Knight's shield.
"You will have to try better than that, scaled rat!"
Kobold is now exceptionally miffed. "Fine then! But next one we find is mine, got it Candle boy?"
"Oh but of course, I am content for now." Lantern remarks, taking a kiss from the Human Princess and grabbing the P'orc Bone from her open hand.
Lantern Knight now holds the P'orc Bone!
A sniff of this trinket and a thought to the intended target will cause great size changes to a specific area of the body until you will it gone or choose a new area.
Anyway, It's getting late, so I'm gonna go sleep. As will the Knights and the Princesses. Until the next morning, /trash/.
Feel free to bump the thread if it ever manages to reach page 10. I'll make another big post when I get up.
A new day has dawned, for me and our heroes both.
The scene has not changed much. Three tents, one for each hero, and two more tents, one by Dog Knight and one by Lantern Knight's tent. Each houses a princess, newly claimed by their respective Knights.
Awakening, the heroes find themselves in a bit of a pickle.
It appears that the 3 Knights in pic related have found the Tower and are currently debating what to do with the three Knights outside the Lantern Knight's tent. Their 3 wagons parked right next to our party's 3 wagons.
All three of our Knights are fully awake, but the Princesses are sound asleep. What shall our heroes do?
Also, Dog Knight can see through the Grizzly's fur and most of Druid Knight's clothing and is most distressed by what he sees.
Not wanting to be rude and interrupt the would-be murderers, the party watches through the opening in their tent, just out of sight.
Most of the conversation is unintelligible as the Bear Knight growls and the Fungus Knight just sort of makes squishing noises. Druid Knight is clearly the leader. "We are standing IN FRONT of our goal. There are princesses here, PLENTY of princesses. We don't have to kill them. Let's just leave them behind and go camp by the huge ass hole in the ground."
>Growling noises followed by squishing
"And? They've got 2. If we go in, we could save 12! It isn't a problem, we just need to agree and GO."
It appears there is a disagreement between Druid and his two compatriots on whether or not to kill your party.
This could be a good point of reference for saving your asses, or even getting a new party member if he's willing.
Across the camp, Dog Knight weeps, A deep sorrow fills him at the idea of being able to see all that dick for the rest of his life.
It builds to the point that he even brings out that noose and is contemplating trying to use it.
Kobold and Lantern signal to each other from under their tents, which happen to be next to one another and pop out, standing by the Druid Knight
Lantern initiates at the surprise on bear Knight's face:
"Now see here, what would you gain from killing us? Two princesses? Of course not, they have bound themselves to us and will not willingly change hands!"
It seems this has upset the mushman and bear. One has taken up a fighting stance and the other is on all fours, ready to pounce. Druid Knight is just staring in shock at Lantern and Kobold that they came out. He sighs and says: "Thanks... you pissed them off. I guess I can help you beat the shit out of them."
A fight is ensuing!
Druid Knight has joined your party!
Specify a target and roll for an attack!
Lets try for better.
Druid use magic to ensnare bear knight.
"Foul fungus! I shall banish you back to the shadows from whence you came!"
His morning star comes crashing down and misses as the Fungus Knight dodges backwards, now lodged in the ground. The Fungoid is preparing for a counter attack!
"Good sir, Bear, I offer you a choice, a map to a treasure trove of honey or the first strike."
"Just kidding. I cast Grasping Roots."
The stars shine bright even in the morning sky as Bear Knight is ensnared, hands and feet to the dry ground, dragged down until his body is pressed against the earth.
"Sir Kobold, would you kindly slay this 'Knight' for me now?" Druid Knight inquired.
Kobold Knight, relishing a chance to finally use his crossbow hunkers down in place and fires a single bolt through the Bear Knight's right eye slit, right eye, popping out the back of his skull and helmet, and sailing into Dog Knight's tent, barely missing the poor Pup.
Bear Knight is now dead.
Dog Knight is greatly surprised at the bolt and jumps out ready to strike upon the nearest foe, mace at the ready.
Lantern must now roll for a block/dodge and Dog Knight is free to assault the Fungal Freak.
Have Lantern raise his shield while Dog uses the Enforcer on Fungus which should be more effective than normal considering Fungus Knight is covered in metal.
Kobold should take this time to reload his crossbow.
Druid attacks Fungus with his Halberd to give Dog an opening to strike
A red energy begins emanating from Lantern Knight's shield, without having to even do anything, it blocks the Fungoid whip with ease.
Seeing a dangerous entity in their camp, Dog Knight whips out a Frisbee and flings it at the armoured assailant.
Sure enough, it lodges right in the back of his head. However, it seems stuck there and only weakened the Malignant Mushroom.
Kobold beings reloading in-case this keeps going.
Druid takes this opportunity to calmly walk up to the Fungal Fighter and lops his head off with a single clean halberd swing. Except... he's still moving, backing away towards the castle.
Aren't there still people in the tower? Assuming that Lantern Knight's shield now has a Fire element charge to it , lob that hot potato at the retreating mushroom.
Get Dog to check on the princesses
As far as anyone is aware, the only people left in the first Tower are the Orc and the 3 Goblins.
"Cretin, you dare run from battle? And to think, you call yourself a KNIGHT! Only a coward runs! Head or not!"
And with a mighty thrust, Lantern Knight flings his red-lit shield, ramming right into the Fungal's legs, bringing him down to near-nothing, except a torso and arms. And it seems, that was enough to end the Mushman.
Dog Knight saunters over to the rest of the group and asks "So... what did I miss, exactly?"
The trio inform Dog Knight of the unfolding events. And thus, the conflict is over and a new tent is set up alongside Dog Knight's for the Druid. Mere minutes after finishing, it seems a squirrel has already taken up camp on top of it.
With the two previous Knights dead, their carts vanishing in a puff of smoke, the party decides it best to get onto going into the dungeon once more. Princesses await.
Whoops, I'm blind.
Before setting out on their next escapade, Dog Knight checks up on both princesses, they are both well awake now and seem content to see the heroes go.
"I'll wait for your return, Pup." -Dwarf Princess
"Thank you for the concern, but I'll be fine..." -Human Princess
Kobold Knight decides it best to inquire into the headgear of their newest member. "So, them horns a pert of your helmet?"
Druid stops what he is doing, rises to his full height and says, "No. They are a gift from a Dryad deep in the Dread Thicket, a place no mortal dares tread. And I would prefer you not discuss them."
Layout updated with info from the other 2 Knights. Goal: whatever is in the Lair.
The Fungal Corpse is lit on fire along with the Bear Corpse just in case and set to burn behind the first Tower. Shall the party proceed down?
>000 The Null
>Roll of 100 as well
Kobold Knight, feeling a sense of minor duty asks the rest of the party to head down without him and goes up to check on the Orc and his Goblins. Something is definitely off, though. As soon as he entered the second floor, everything went black. He seemed to be surrounded by nothing, infinitely distressed by the sudden change, Kobold is spinning about looking for anything to shoot at, beginning to freak out.
"Calm yourself, short one. You have Nothing to fear in my Void. I have taken an interest in you, as have the Demons for some reason. I wish to offer you a gift. But in exchange, I will ask something of you. In the end, you will find it greatly in your favor. Do you accept this deal?
Heading down, Lantern and Druid marvel at the statue of Elt and the store room before they begin the descent into the Lair itself and are caught awestruck by the mountains of gold and treasure.
They are now at the entrance of the lair outlined in the map above. Where shall they go now and do they split up?
"For what reason would I need flammable objects? I am no beast of burden."
"Eh, I ah... see. That depends really, what kind of deal are we discussing? Cause if there's one thing my mum always taught my litter, it's never make deals with devils, shadows, and dragons. They will only end up eating you alive, figuratively AND literally."
The shadow all about him responds: "I see. Then allow me to take a step back. I.. am Nothing, the god of emptiness, void, and passage. I will give you safe passage to anywhere in the Towers or Lair and in exchange, all I ask is you bear the sigil of my Vacous from now on. In laymen's terms, become an servant of Nothing. My servants have no duties beyond seeking to give safe passage to all who request their help in getting from where they are to where they want to be."
"Ah, I see. Thank you being from Beyond."
Scrounging about in his pack, Lantern can't seem to find anything, but realizes something.
"Companions, it would be best we split up and hunt for our Princesses. Give me your melees."
"Flame and spirit, Light and sight, guard these tools from the flames, yet let them carry on well into the night!"
It is at this point that the tops of Druid's Halberd and Dog Knight's Mace burst into flames, yet do not burn beyond the very tip of the wood/paper respectively.
For one reason or another, Lantern Knight's face plate has a look along the lines of ":3"
Dog and Druid Knight are quite impressed.
>Why not the first time?
"Ah, that is an easy one. I do not like people. I rather despise them, unreliable, horrid creatures. Especially HUMANS. As such, I could not draw you close for two reasons:
One, you were with a HUMAN and two, that same HUMAN was a damn candle! I couldn't get close to him if I wanted to!"
"Now that is a tough one. Primarily, it is because I noticed the Demons eyeing you. I know not their plan, but I do enjoy participating in their escapades. So, I wish to claim you and see how they react."
A twinge of fear goes through the tiny arbalest at the thought of the Dragon Princess, a call back to his dream.
"K-Kobold Princess. I want her. Take me to her and I will accept your seal."
The darkness contemplates this. "Hmm, are you certain? If so, I shall open a door to her personal bedchamber in the First Tower."
Sweet fire enchantment.
>"Nothing" cant be near sources of light
Sounding more and more like some kinda demon to me... Besides, we don't even know where in this place where Kobold Princess is or even if this is the " First Tower"! Taking this things' mark sounds like a terrible idea.
The possibility of getting separated from the rest of the knights and getting cursed to do whatever "Nothing" desires kinda outweighs Princess poon at the moment. You can't enjoy it if you're dead y'know
>42 The Stars Align
"Yes, I want her back. Give her to me, Nothing."
"So it has been said, so it shall be! I'll even leave the door open for a safe return."
Is it a terrible idea?
Things are only lethal if you back yourselves into it AND roll poorly.
The darkness rapidly abates, a sigil burning itself into the Kobold Knight's forearm, invisible beneath his armour.
The floor he is on now has a doorway embedded into the wall. It is a pure black and made from wrought iron. Presumably, it leads directly to the Kobold Princess.
(I'll go ahead and let you gents know, VERY few Gods or Devils want to harm the Knights. However, the more followers they have, the more powerful they become. Thus Elt and the Dog and Nothing and the Kobold.)
Waltzing up to the door, Kobold decides to be a badass and kicks the door in.
Sure enough, it bounces back and hits him in the face, knocking him down. "Oh jeez, how the hell do I make a bold entrance with this thing?"
The door now has a sticky note on it.
'My doors do not like to be abused.'
"Good door, I do humbly apologize. I hope I may enter you calmly now."
Sure enough, the door opens peacefully beneath his puny grip and opens into another chamber, it is round in nature and have two doors. One to the left, slightly cracked open, and one to the right, closed shut. Signing and water can be heard coming out of the left door.
(I'm surprised you guys missed something important. See this post and figure it out.: >>1126939)
Is it the symbol on kobolds card?
I noticed it.
Didn't think it was important to mention though.
Anyway give the door on the right a cursory check to see if it's locked then head int the left.
Checking the right door, it seems to open outward and the outer hall is as unguarded as the Human Princess' Tower.
Turning about, the Nothing door is standing there, mouth open, waiting.
Stepping slowly, ever so slowly towards the door, heart racing, the Kobold Knight is finally there to save her. After almost eight years apart, he's finally getting his little sister back. And nobody will ever take her away again, not his family or their "rules of Monarchy." Or anyone else.
A single rasp upon the door and he waits patiently. "One minute, sir~ I'll be out in a minute. I hope you can wait..."
The water turns off.
The sound of towels being put on and humming fills the air as he waits, nervous, of when she sees him.
The door pulls open, painfully slow, every moment palpable in his mind.
And then, it is open and she is in front of the Kobold Knight. Her eyes are wide. "You aren't the guard... and that bow... could it be....?"
The other 3 members are still in the entrance space of the Lair by the way.
"It is." Kobold Knight says, before pulling his sister in a vice-like hug.
He releases Kobold Princess and says "Get dressed. I'm here to save you and anyone else we find, but above all else, you."
She spots the door and has a question she keeps to herself before going to her dresser.
How does she end up dressing from pic related?
Lantern Knight takes the direct approach and heads forwards. He is stopped short as there is a princess sitting plain as day just forward and to the left. He can't make out who it is, but it's already got him excited for his second catch.
Dog Knight travels left, noting a shape in the far end on his new right, and a non-collapsed doorway to his left. (Map will be updated in a sec.)
At the same time, Druid Knight heads right along the gold head and stops at the second crossroad. Down south is a doorway, north is a 3 point intersection flooded with gold, a little bit to the left of it is a small gap between two swathes of gold, and east has a narrow path between two heaps of treasure.
We now have up to 4 characters acting per turn.
Gonna go with the Aztec stuff - a brother/sister combo with one for close range and one for long range? Doesn't get much better than that.
Dog Knight uses his nose to check if the shape is a living being
I'm not sure what to have Druid do
Sorry for the delay. Dinner and whatnot.
Anyway, taking a paint bucket and her normal outfit out of a drawer, the Kobold Princess gets dressed and then drenches herself in red paint. "All ready to go!"
The siblings step through the Black Door back into the entrance tower, head downstairs, and go back to Kobold Knight's tent to discuss life and whatnot.
Lantern Knight holds his flail aloft, but can't quite make out who it is. They are big and green, but that's really it.
Dog Knight, sniffing the air can tell that the creature over there is alive, but can't tell much else.
Druid Knight stands around, contemplating what the hell to do.
Dog Knight decides to draw the attention and barks across the chamber. The entity turns about and looks down, but seems confused.
At the same time, Lantern Knight sees Orc princess look over from her tied up position down the hall on his left.
Druid Knight is currently in the fetal position wondering what to do.
On a 1-33 North, 34-66 East, 67-99 South, Druid Knight makes up his mind and heads south.
The southern route brings him to the mouth of a path leading up. On his right, there seems to be a small alcove among the treasures.
Coming up close, Lantern Knight confirms it is Orc Princess and proceeds to look about for danger. Finding nothing, he kneels down and asks here "Miss, May I untie you?"
Shocked at finding such a bright presence she did not see before, says "I.. of course. I'd love to get out of here."
Just as a lewd idea enters Dog Knight's head, another creature appears next to the previous, does a strange dance, and then kneels down beside the next one. It may be worth investigating. Or perhaps Dog Knight should go into the door on his left. Updated map next post.
The thought of getting pounded by Dwarf Princess entered the Dog Knight's mind for a moment, before being replaced by him pounding the Dwarf Princess.
"I'm glad you feel that way." He says as he karate chops her arm bonds, slicing them clean in half.
She undoes her leg binds herself and stands up, happy to have mobility again.
"Well then," she says, "Shall we be off?"
Skirting into the alcove, Druid Knight finds himself face-to-face with the Succubus Princess... lounging on a pile of gold. She seems to be gazing off into nothingness.
Dog Knight, cautiously begins walking towards the two figures. As he gets closer and they continue doing their weird dance, it comes into focus and the Pup realizes: It's Lantern Knight and the Orc Princess!
A modest sorrow fills the Dog Knight, he has been beaten to the punch!
Lantern Knight, unaware of Dog Knight's presence helps the Orc Princess up and introduces himself as "The Guiding Light, Lantern Knight."
She seems.. mildly entertained by this and the party of two makes their way back along the treasure path back up into the Tower to the camp. They will arrive in a few turns if nothing goes wrong.
Waltzing up the Succubus Princess, our Druid stands before her and says in a low whisper: "What do a devil and a Druid have in common?"
Without looking at him, she simply says, "We're both stuck in a Dragon den?"
"I was thinking the horns, but I guess that is true as well... Mind being rescued, since it seems your limbs are unbound...?"
Finally, the demon looks at her "savior" and says "sure. Lead the way!"
Now Druid Knight and guest are also heading towards camp. Dog Knight is the only one alone now.
To his left is a collapsed tunnel. North is a normal tunnel, and south is a normal tunnel.
The exit is southwest of his location.
Guy who came up with Dog Knight months ago when Towergirls threads were still allowed on /tg/.
Dog gets to go north first
Besides me being fucking awful at eroticism, we keep most of the porn-type posts over in
It seems to just be a pile of rubble. Nothing special. Although it seems to have led somewhere at one point.
So I should throw him a bone?
I am honored to have one of the old Towergirls Anons in thread. Thanks.
Due north, Dog Knight finds another passageway, as expected. This one, like the others, leads up. Probably to another Tower. Without another thought, the courageous Pup heads up to the bottom floor of another Tower.
It's exceptionally late here, so calling it quits for now. Will post in the morning again. All the Knights, except Dog Knight, have made it back to camp and will sleep soundly tonight. Our Valiant Dog seeks refuge in the safety of Tower 17's bottom floor, it shall be a rough rest, but a needed one.
The following occurs in the night.
Night passes into day. A new day has dawned.
Dog Knight sleeps upon the cold stones of the 17th Tower.
A deep rumble fills the entire facility for about one hour. It seems *something* is coming.
Lantern, Kobold, and Druid Knight all returned to camp safely and slept well.
Lantern added the Orc Princess to his claim and may now freely take from her two Dowries at the cost of one space on the cart when he leaves. *
Kobold Knight added the Kobold Princess to his claim and may now freely take one of her two dowries for free. *
Druid Knight, a bit nervous at being with a red devil, ends up sleeping with the Succubus Princess and adds her to his claim. He may take either of her dowries for free. *
Most of the camp is worried about Dog Knight, especially the Dwarf Princess.
DAWN OF THE THIRD DAY.
No new adversaries have shown up today.
Each Knight kisses their Princesses goodbye before setting off, Dwarf Princess is in a state of longing for her Pup and is debating hunting him down herself. "I'll give him one more day..."
"Hey, sis, I still get one of your dowries, for savin' ya, right?" Oh of course sir Knight. Please, which shall you take?"
Without a second thought, Kobold Knight took the Warm Ore, since all Kobolds live half as long as normal that night.
"Since we are safe now, may I partake of your fabled Primordial Dust?"
A smile creeps over her face as the Orc Princess holds it out to him, ready for snorting.
With a single intake, the Lantern Knight pours it into his face mask, almost choking on the bittersweet bones.
Lantern Knight has one slot left on his cart.
"So tell me, sugar. Do you fancy a quick fuck before I give you my gift?"
Druid Knight, the Wooded Warrior has a blush on his helmet. "I.. maybe. I'll take that Shadow Brace of yours first, though."
Druid Knight has also earned the Desert Oil.
Dog Knight awakens to the same room he was in before, the bottom floor of a Tower. To his left and right are tunnels. Behind him is the tunnel back to the Lair.
In front of him is the stairwell up to the next floor. There is also a note upon the ground in front of him. Taking a gander, Dog Knight finds that it reads "A word of advice for the Pup, you missed a Princess in the lair, a little green slut, too. Thought you may want to know." -Elt
On the back is a miniature map of the left side of the Lair, complete with a big red X in a spot in the middle of a huge gold heap.
Map in next pic.
Dog Knight follows the map diligently to the marked space on the other side of the gold heap and sure enough, finds a walkway to the center.
And in its center is a small, green lump that seems to be inch-worming across the ground towards something at the far end.
Dog Knight, the valiant hero, steps over the mass and walks up to what seems to be a crown. At this point, the Pup puts two and two together and realizes this is the Goblin Princess. "About damn time! I've been freezing my ass off here!.. Oh.. you're a dog...Hope ya know how ta fuck, canine."
It seems the Goblin Princess is happy to see you. You are also now carrying her crown.
The trio is now entering the Dungeon, heading down to the Lair.
"Oh I do," Dog Knight says, a low, primal purr in his throat.
He proceeds to put Goblin Princess' crown upon her head, picks her up, still bound, overblown tiddies mashed right into his neck and proceeds to travel back to the Entrance Tower and go back to camp.
Just as they reach the bottom floor of the Entrance Tower, Dog Knight sprints into view and zips past, carrying something green on his shoulder. It seems he is excited.
The party has now entered the Lair. Where to?
Kobold, feeling well, bold, decides to scrounge about the lower right of the lair, where Druid was before.
Lantern and Druid decide to check out the big path in the upper right.
Sure enough, Kobold Knight happens upon a pathway leading up into a Tower. Dare he enter it or check the wedge path on the central right?
The duo are greeted with a much more... interesting sight.
Just around the bend, the Dragon Princess her self is lounging in a pool of molten gold. Giggling just a bit, the titan is grabbing handfuls of treasure and more gold and just dropping them into the pool and her mouth. It's clear she's been doing this for a while, judging by the rotundness of her gut.
Just as the trio begins wondering what to do, she backstrokes over to them, not seeming to care and says "Oh, hey there guys. I was wondering when you'd show up. Want to join me for a dip in my hot tub? It's comfy and warm~
Reminder: This hot tub is a pit of molten gold.
Just being near the Dragon Princess fills Kobold, Lantern, and druid with a potent heat close to around a hundred and ten degrees Fahrenheit.
>00 the Void
Here's the Dragon Princess tile btw.
Kobold Knight decides to check out the Tower. The bottom floor is nothing special, like every other tower. To his left is a tunnel. To his right, a collapsed tunnel. Dead ahead, the stairwell up.
Druid Knight, feeling it best to use his beast-conquering skills to tame her, says "Miss, do you require saving?"
To which she replies, "No... not really, I'm just enjoying myself down here with all my treasure. Ah, it's so shiny and tasty..."
She gently floats away, her tail paddling her towards the other end. It seems she is content to just do whatever it is she's doing.
Once more, the Druid Knight steps forward and shouts across the pool:
"May we have your Draconic Ruby?"
A boiling red gemstone floats in the golden goop right to the edge of the pool nearest the Druid Knight.
"Enjoy~ I'll want it back when you're done..."
Feeling in a sporty mood, Kobold Knight ascends the stairway, sprinting. However, the second he enters the basement-2 floor, he faceplants. Mostly cause his foot snagged on *something*.
In a show of faith, Druid Knight stuffs the ruby in his pocket and jumps headfirst into the molten gold. Sure enough, it's hot as hell, but just bearable enough with the Ruby to not kill the Druid.
He swims over and decides to climb the titan of a Princess. He is now presently resting atop her overstuffed gut, wondering what to do next. Dragon Princess is giggling at his movements, as they tickle.
Spinning about and getting into a firing position on one knee, Kobold Knight puts his back to the wall. It appears he tripped over a pile of black stuff. Hard to tell what it is.
A survey of the room reveals he is in what appears to be a room covered in cobwebs, black stuff, and has a statue of a massive man sitting in a chair taking up most of the center. The walls are covered in small alcoves filled with even more spiderwebs. There may be some loot back there and the statue seems of note, too. Plus all this black... stuff.
The Princesses at camp have all gotten together around a campfire as the sun begins to set to discuss things.
Dwarf, Human, Kobold, Succubus, Ghost, and Orc Princess.
Goblin Princess is cuddling with Dog Knight at the moment.
"So, how has everyone been since... whenever we last saw each other?" -Human
"Oh, you mean when Dragon Princess brought us all in on that big ass basket? Yeah.. life has been... alright, thanks for asking." -Dwarf I
"Oh, that was awful... that damn Mimic latched onto my horns and tried to eat them..." -Succubus
"And don't forget the Skeleton girl fell apart and ended up getting half of herself stuck in the Slime!" -Orc
It seems the party is playing catch up on past events.
Better check the ceiling for anything Kobold
A survey up and down shows just more cobwebs, black stuff stuck to the ceiling, and not much else. A small glint catches his eye in the Statue's left hand. It seems he is holding a staff that is entrenched in at least half a dozen layers of cobwebs, more black goop, and a snake corpse coiled about the entire length.
>TFW you forget to grab both posts.
In an attempt to be "Playful," Druid Knight uses the Shadow Brace to create a dark copy of himself and proceeds to spread himself and his shadow out upon the Dragon princess' overburdened belly and use his whole body as a sort of feather duster/massager. This seems to elicit more giggles from the Red Titan. At this point, it seems like she is drunk off her own treasure.
Slowly, gently, tiptoeing around the black masses, Kobold Knight arrives at the statue. The face is a blank slate and the staff is incomprehensible through all the webs, snake, and upon closer inspection, the black goop stuck to it is in-fact, spiders. Thousands of tiny sleeping spiders. They don't seem to react at all when touched.
Beginning to enjoy this, Druid Knight puts every ounce of energy into tickling the Dragon Princess as she continues to shovel treasure into her mouth, large quantities spilling into the ever-so-slowly growing pool. She is very clearly enjoying herself. Lantern Knight looks on with a quirked eyebrow, unsure of where this is heading.
Rolling down her gut, Druid Knight lands right on top of her titanic panties. Almost as long as he is, close to 6 or 7 times as wide, it's going to be difficult to steal these... Should he still go for it?
Kobold Knight feels like a moron for forgetting it, whips out his Wand of Light and sheaths his crossbow to look about. Sure enough, it didn't help one bit. The room is lit now, but now it's just obvious that everything is covered in cobwebs and spiders. The staff's head is glinting slightly brighter now that a light source exists.
>unclip her bra
"You do realize that part of her is submerged in molten gold, right...?"
Dusting off some of the webs and spiders, the head of the staff appears to have 8 red gems embedded into the head of a stone spider, legs curling outward in a natural position.
Perhaps it is designed to control spiders...?
"You do realize I can't see shit down there, right? It's like swimming through really hot sludge. I'd rather go back to that Dryad than try to do something that complex without eyes."
The eyes do not budge. It seems that is not the key. However, it seems the staff is not attached to the hand holding it. The hand is more of a holder for the staff, wide enough to slot it easily, but not open to let it fall out.
"Damn right I would. I get nervous just being near these flamin' beasts!" Druid Knight goes back to molesting Dragon Princess' rotund gut, now also standing on her crotch, his shadow clone still on top rolling around.
A quick examination determines there are no dangers here, except MAYBE all the spiders...
Standing on the arm of the statue, Kobold Knight begins slowly raising the staff. And... success! The staff comes free and just as it does, every single damn spider in the room awakens, staring intently at the Kobold.
They seem to be waiting for... something.
Perhaps you should give them an order with your new staff?
Lantern is enjoying the show Druid Knight is putting on and Dog Knight is doing lewd things with his Goblin Princess. Currently, she is getting eaten out while she is having dinner in their tent.
>Spiders to Princess
"Hey, Spider-bros. Take me to the Drider Princess!"
The spiders, in a massive storm of legs and bodies, pour down the stairs, leaving Kobold Knight standing there. It seems his command didn't go exactly to plan...
>88 miles per hour!
A jaunt down below reveals the spiders are stampeding down the path on the right tunnel. However, it seems they are stampeding TOWARDS you.
Kobold Knight leaps up the staircase as they flood the lower floor. It seems they are carrying the Drider Princess. I guess that works. Fast fuckers, too. She is bound hands, feet, feet, feet, and feet, all her eyes blindfolded, mouth gagged.
Thinking he would enjoy a shiny Lantern, the Glowy Knight dips the end of his flail into the molten gold...
Well, he got a gold-plated lantern. And a gold-plated flame as well, just sort of sitting there in the holder, not emitting light. This... may be a problem. Also, the lake is now on fire.
Lantern Knight, disconcerted, begins freaking out that a lake of MOLTEN GOLD is now ALSO ON FIRE.
"Ah, finally... C'mere, sweetheart... lemme undo those bindings."
The Kobold proceeds to undo each of her 4 sets of leg binds, arm binds, takes off the three blindfolds. And lastly, the mouth gag.
With a start, the Drider Princess falls forward and says "Oh, ah, thank you.. tiny... Knight?" I was most... entangled in that mess... shall we see our way out?"
Lantern Knight casually walks away, whistling, pretending he was never there and heads for the upper left Tower entrance. Passing time a tad, he is now on the bottom floor of the 17th Tower. To his left and right are tunnels, the stairs up dead ahead.
Druid Knight climbs up atop the Dragon Princess' gut again, then proceeds, with his shadow, to her titanic titties.
They both wedge themselves inside and begin swimming in a veritable sea of boobs. Dragon princess is as amused as ever, a slight purr working its way into her voice.
>13 Bad Luck Right There
"Yep, much better. Now, would you mind if I ride you?"
Drider Princess is shocked! "Excuse me? We have only just met, you insolent smudge!"
Kobold takes a step back and says, "I did not mean that! I meant ride you out of here, my legs are tired from running around the dungeon!"
Drider Princess quirks an eyebrow. "And? If anything, YOU should carry ME out of here!"
Basically. Dwarf princess is actually happy he is back, despite the other issue.
I should start marking locations with maps for people. Color coding SHOULD be obvious.
In his audacious escapade in the Kingdom of boobs, Druid Knight loses his helmet in the sea of tits.
At one point, he locks eyes with his shadow and the shadow disintegrates. He should probably go find that.
Traveling along the right path, Lantern Knight finds himself in the base of Tower 19, the final Tower in the first Dungeon. He knows because there's a shining gold placard on the wall by the path to the Lair in this tower that says so.
Drider, miffed at the pitiful excuse of a Knight that is a Kobold, begins strutting into the lair, the spider horde leading the way, carrying Kobold Knight with them. They will be back at camp soon.
Sure enough, Druid Knight finds his helm deep in the scaled confines of these cozy titties. Reattaching it, now would probably be a good time to try and "save" this Draconic titan.
The placard is firmly screwed to the wall. No luck.
Kobold Knight has reached camp soon after dark arises. Goblin Princess is done with her lewd and lascivious acts. Dog and Kobold may now take Dowries, in exchange for a spot on their carts, respectively.
"So tell me, you lovely giant you, feel like being saved yet?" The scent of molten gold and smoke is beginning to get to Druid Knight.
"Ah... I guess. You've entertained me pretty nicely. But I'm WAY too stoned to get out of here myself. Could you carry me? Do that and I'm all yours~"
Think Druid and his Shadow Clone can carry several tons of princess? Or harder yet, fit her in those tower doors? Perhaps a spell could help here... there is a hole in the ceiling that leads *somewhere.*
Up the tower the Lantern Knight travels. The very next floor, Basement-2, appears to be a hatchery of some description. Thousands of tiny insect-sized pods fill the walls. Should he investigate or carry on up? The room is eerily quiet.
Dog Knight kneels before the Goblin Princess, a steep kneel too, and requests the King's Crown.
"For you, anything, Pup." The tiny bombshell replies as she places the Crown over one ear.
The crown is too small to fit over the whole head, but will not come off due to ROYAL MAGICK.
"I.. ah, know we got off on the wrong foot.. but would it be too much to ask you to make me a set of Mithril Rings from your Gossamer?"
Drider Princess, actually camping in a tent made of her own silk, looks the Kobold up and down and says, "Sure. I guess that's the least I can offer *you* for saving me."
Drider Princess is not happy, but bestows the Rings to the Kobold, who stows them both on his left Ring finger, extending it by approximately 1/8th of an inch.
>Orc has no options on 1d4
>Dwarf 1 AND 2 have no options on 1d4
>Goblin Princess does.
First things first.
Let's employ some of that crazy plant magic Druid has to grow a tree out of the "Lake of Golden Flame" that's large enough to support DP and through the hole in the ceiling.
Lantern proceeds onward carefully sidestepping the eggs
Rolling for Deepwood Duds
>99 Luck Smiles Upon the Just
Apron it is.
"Oh, I am going to regret this later... Gaia, I call upon you and your Sisters, Seven, lend me your strength and hoist this heifer into the heavens!"
Literally nothing happens. The lake is still on fire as you and Dragon Princess float about it.
"It would seem... Gaia is not pleased with me."
>63 The Rule
"Okay, uhm... lemme think here... who could I ask for help... Pan? Naa, that fag hates me since I stole his wife... Demons can't help here... Do I still have that Wizard's number...? Nope. I do have a piece of paper from... somewhere..." The note reads: "For Godly Assistance, call out for Elt, the Builder!"
With a shrug, Druid Knight calls out, "Elt, God of Building! I call out to thee! Help me save this four ton beast!"
A great rumble fills the air...
A whisper in the shakes is heard. "All gifts... have a cost..."
Druid Knight blacks out as a large stone pillar shoots Dragon princess and Druid Knight up out of the cavern, through about four hundred feet of stone and dirt, and they go sailing over the dunelands into camp, landing Dragon-first on top of Druid Knight's (thankfully empty) tent. The squirrel, and it's dozen brothers camping on the roof are now dead.
Once the dust clears, it appears Druid Knight is now a woman! This could... be a problem. For the Druid Knight, anyway. Dragon Princess is still stoned out of her mind on treasure.
Besides sitting around gazing at the wall, Lantern Knight has been exploring the egg sac floor of Basement-2 Tower 19.
In your absence (I missed the post telling him to go up.), he has found a treasure chest near the back of the room with a very over-sized egg on top of it. Dare he open it?
(I'll take that as a yes.)
Gently, ever so gently, Lantern Knight props the lid of the chest open, using the wall to move the egg safely up. Inside, Lantern Knight finds...
A decent pile of gold...
Two shitty shields...
A bag containing some Chocolate Dicks...
And a rare item! Roll for it now!
A small label on the back says "push here for instructions."
Druid Knight presses it.
"HI! I'm Billy Mays! Here to tell you all about the MAGIC CONDOM! You just open the package, unroll the condom, stick it on your dick, and BAM! You can cast pervert magic! Pervert for aspiring wizards and peeping toms alike! Your rod is your wand! Now if you'll excuse me, I got to get back to my universe!"
Deciding Pervert Magic isn't his forte, Lantern Knight stows the condom for later.
He then heads back down to the Bottom Floor of Tower 19 and makes camp.
I'm tired and got shit to do tomorrow, so will have a later start than usual. Thanks for coming. Looks like we may fill our first thread tomorrow.
>Dawn of the Fourth Day
Our first Adventure is drawing to a close.
In the night, once again nothing has happened majorly.
A rumble from deep below emanates throughout the lower sections of the Dungeon.
The Cart Status is as follows:
Dire brandy (free)
1 slot left
P'orc Bone (free)
1 slot left
Warm ore (free)
Amethyst Gossamer [Mithril Rings]
1 slot left.
Shade Brace (free)
Draconic Ruby (free)
1 slot left
Somehow, everything has evened out.
Lantern Knight is sleeping in the basement of the 19th Tower.
Everyone else is snug, asleep in their camps, thoughts of poor Lantern Knight emanating, amplified by a Princess who decided to join camp temporarily.
A new day has dawned. The (Now female and struggling to cope) Druid Knight, Kobold, and Dog Knight all trek into the Lair in the hunt for their final claim. All the princesses, except Dragon princess, still asleep, wish their brave Knights a safe adventure.
Lantern Knight awakes to a grinning demon sitting on his chest. It is not familiar, but seems to be an imp of some description.
Ask him to get off and how'd he get in the tent in first place
9 Princesses, about a dozen squirrels camping on Dragon princess' belly, and 7 tents.
Ascending to the next floor, the Egg room is as normal as ever. The next floor up, however, is a graveyard. Quite literally a full-blown graveyard, dirt, grass, and all. A gnarled oak fills the center of this chamber, roots digging into the dirt and cobbles beneath. A twisted root is poking up from one side of the ground.
This is a strange place.
(No we don't. Trash has an ~10 hour kill time on threads once they auto-sage. There are still threads on page 10 from yesterday.)
The gravestones are all unmarked. However, there is also a gravestone inside a hollowed out knot it the tree. It is exceptionally tiny, but still a grave.
>111 The Room
A gentle finger press reveals the tombstone pops out with ease. The dirt on the grave coming with it. Underneath is a fingerbone. You now have a tiny headstone. And a skeletal finger.
The next floor up... is definitely not right.
You just walked up into what can only be described as a generic anime classroom.
As you stand there, staring around blankly, a stern-faced woman at the front says: "Lantern, sit down! I will not tolerate any more interruptions!"
Taking a moment to asses the situation, you find there is no evil and the teacher wants to teach you *something*
>42 The Stars Align
"Ah, well, you see.. I found this Imp two floors down and I had to help the little bastard out..."
He says this, while pulling out said imp.
The teacher eyes it firmly and says "Fine. Now please, just sit down?" She seems a tad tired.
Exceptionally. Minor crows feet half-hidden with makeup, a miniskirt on top of a plush rear, and a set of impressive tits, as big as her head, bulging out of a shirt unbuttoned from the second to ~6th button, exposing a chasm of cleavage. With shoes on also about 6'6"
>Forgot important details
I'm good at this.
Flowing red hair, slightly graying at the roots, curls down her back to just above her ass, pale blue eyes and hauntingly pale skin. White shirt, black skirt, blood red pumps.
Seems to be. Almost like she was made for this event...
Taking a seat in the very center of all the desks, Lantern Knight begins to get a bit excited, curious to how this will go.
"...Thank you, Lantern. You know you're my favorite, right? Anyway, onto our private lesson..."
She then begins to drone on about something called "Advanced Logic processes" and "How to solve puzzles without help."
It is hard to tell, but there may be a point here she is trying to make.
While it is boring, Lantern Knight does soak in some information while watching her bounty of boobs and bottom shake about, her tits actually erasing any work she puts on the lower portions of the white board.
The words 'Tower', 'princess', 'god', and 'Desire' is the seemingly most important words that make it into Lantern's mind.
"Now! After all that, I hope you understand what I'm trying to say..."
"Of course! It's clear as day to me now! When uh... when is the test?"
Towering over you in your desk, the teacher bends down, planting her titantic titties in front of your face. There is a paper sticking out from between her bosoms. "Right now."
"The helmet stays on."
In an attempt to grab just the paper, you end up slipping, shoving your arm half-way into her cleavage. She doesn't seem to mind as you grab the bottom end of the page and pull it out. She then walks away, a #2 pencil now on your desk.
The question on the page is as follows:
"Will you save me?"
Underneath is a picture of a skull and crossbones. There is a line to write on between the skull and the question.
>Forgot the pic
I am just dropping the ball today.
You fish out the fingerbone and say "I think this belongs to you..."
She waltzes up to you and states "Why yes, it is. Thank you good Knight. Some filthy Imp stole it earlier. Now that you've seen my true form, are you still interested?" She says, running her newly fixed hand up your cheek.
Reaching up over his head, Lantern Knight pops off the Skeleton Princess' head and gives her a big smooch on the... bones. Cause she doesn't have lips.
Once done and you pull back slightly, she says "I'll take that as a 'yes.'"
The classroom disintegrates around our Lantern Knight as the Skeleton takes her head back and reattaches it.
"Shall we head back to camp?~"
A cursory examination show you are in the ground floor of Tower 19.
Lantern inquires. Skeleton Princess replies: Oh, ah, I kinda got teleported here when someone triggered a trap elsewhere... I.. just... rolled with it. I could probably teleport us to the camp if you want...?"
Lantern takes the bony Maiden's hand and says "By all means, lead the way."
"If you insist... a fair warning, if you have any sources of light on you, you'll need to extinguish them..."
>Your lantern is already out, since it got gold plated.
"In that case... give a thanks to Nothing as we pass through, he's a kind god and I'm happy to follow him."
Sure enough, a Nothing door appears in the wall of the this floor. Stepping through it, a "thank you" exhaled as each passes through, the other side is in-fact, the main entrance to the Entrance Tower. Dragon Princess is still asleep, well into the night and nobody else seemed to notice their arrival.
Lantern Knight has officially filled his cart!
Now then, what was the trio doing during all this time?
"So, ah... should we, go search for some Princesses?" -Kobold Knight
"Naa. I'm enjoying this." -Druid Knight
It seems they've been sitting in the entrance of the Lair playing Texas Hold'Em. For 8 hours.
See that little wedge-space on the right? That.
Druid Knight sets off in search of the Boy Princess. She shall reclaim her dong!
Coming to the wedge-space in question, she shimmys through, gold pouring down around her. On the other side, she finds herself in another section of the Lair.
Continuing to the next intersection, Druid Knight is standing right next to the Golem Princess. She is deactivated. Do you power her on or continue in any direction?
"How about no! Get your ass over here and carry this bitch yourself!"
"Aw... fine... through the Gold Chasm, right?"
You are now free to go anywhere you want in the Lair again.
It didn't seem to help much in finding that fucker.
But it seems the Lair is almost fully fleshed out.
Sorry for the delay.
To the south is a small alcove. On the ground is some undone rope bindings and a note: "Be back soon, visiting friends."
(I can't believe nobody has commented on this yet from earlier posts.)
Dog Knight be carryin' his wind-up doll back to camp.
Heading north, DK in-fact, find the Boy Princess! (s)he is just sitting there on the ground, arms bound, knees up. "Ah, oh, hello there...?"
Kobold Knight decided to come find Druid Knight to see what the fuck she was doing.
But lo and behold, he spots the second Dwarf Princess!
>696 The Slutty Trifecta
In a burst of passion, Druid Knight whips off her breast(ha) plate and exposes her considerable titties.
"Do you want some of these, big Boy?"
Boy Princess, in a burst of energy, hops up, arms still bound and says "Yes!" before jumping head-first into your bosom. You have captured the Boy Princess... sort of.
At the same time, Kobold Knight waltzes over to the bearded Dwarf Girl and simply picks her up, saying "You're mine now, get over it."
She doesn't put up much of a fight, but is somewhat concerned....
>Pictures cut 30 seconds off the post cooldown timer.
It seems you forgot an important rule.. or 2.
You automatically receive the Lust Gift (after ---- line) when you fuck them at max Lust and so far, only Druid Knight has done that with Succubus.
Each Knight only has 4 slots on their cart. Each one only has 1 slot left and all Dowries after each Knight's first take up a Cart slot.
No more Dowries for you, unless you get rid of one of your Princesses/other (not free) Dowries.
Once these 2 return home, our first adventure will in-fact, be coming to a close.
Fair point. Alright then. Back to camp and give up the Ruby it is.
Druid Knight and Kobold Knight walk back to camp together. One carrying a Boy Princess by the head with her tits, the other carrying a Dwarf slung over his back. They arrive at camp. Everything is calm and peaceful.
Presently, Druid Knight no longer holds the Draconic Ruby as far as rules go, but has no returned it to Dragon Princess, since she's still asleep.
As it stands, Druid Knight is now the only entity with an open Cart slot. As such, the other 3 will be spending time with their new lovers/mates/sister/etc.
And probably using Dragon Princess' bloated gut as a bouncy castle.
"I'll go!" the Dog Knight called out. Lantern and Kobold seemed content with their claims.
Down into the Lair one final time...
In the dark of night, Druid Knight goes Princess Hunting with a faithful Dog. Where to?
Stumbling over Gold and loot untold, Dog and Druid Knight wind their way to that spot and find... the Knight Princess!
Full clear achievement! The Lair.
Then punch her. Square in the face and wake her up.
Slowly, softly, Druid Knight moves forward to wake up the Knight Princess. A single touch upon the shoulder and she wakes with a start, "Yes, Sir!?"
She looks around for a second before realizing she's not back in Knight school. "Oh ah... hi there miss.. Druid? Rare to meet another Princess down here."
Druid Knight explains that she isn't a Knight.
"Oh, ah.. sorry? Do you.. want to rescue me?"
"I... ah.. see. Alright then... I guess we'll duel!"
"Do you want me to cut your bindings?" -Druid
"No thank you, I am good." -Knight Princess
You are now facing the formidable Knight Princess, with her arms still tied!
"What exactly would I need with princesses? I mean, i guess I could lead you like a marauding band of... Princesses? No. If I win, I get to have you alllllll to myself, pretty girl." She has a lascivious smile upon her face.
>74 A Laffy Taffy and 2 Bouncy Balls
Before you can attack, it begins raining confetti.
"Hello and welcome to another episode of Perverts and Princesses! Tonight, we have our contestants, Druid Princess? Dog Knight, and Knight Princess!"
The three Knights are now currently staring at the tiny man with the jumbo plastic head spewing words.
"Now then, you may be asking yourself, 'What the fuck is going on!?' and the answer is quite simple. I have stopped time to record an episode of my TV show, Perverts and Princesses. Play nice and do as I say and I'll be gone soon enough. I'll even pay you for your troubles. Tickets for use at the Prize Booth!. Good? Good." A prize booth has materialized in a gold pile nearby. The worker at the counter REALLY looks like he hates his life.
"Now then, ON WITH THE SHOW! The rules are simple. Best of 3 challenges wins! Now, the first challenge is very simple... Beat the tar out of each other until one of you dies! Don't worry, I've got a Resurrection scroll in place. Good? Good. Aaaand fight!"
Deciding to just go for it, you take a sweeping kick at the Knight Princess. Seeing ti coming, she deftly leaps over your body and flips you over onto Dog Knight!
The spirit of battle has overtaken all 3 of you!
Druid Knight makes a Diplomacy roll!
Sure enough it works!
The two of you dog pile on Dog Knight!
With your combined brutality, you quite literally tear Dog Knight in half. The poor Pooch dies with a sickening plop as his guts strew about the area.
And in one fell swoop, the first round is over.
One point goes to each of Druid and Knight Princess!
A scoreboard overhead marks this.
"Vaaantastic! Moving on... uhm... 'words words words.... I resummon Dog Knight."
And in a puff of smoke, Dog Knight appears, wholly unharmed.
"Wonderful. Onto round 2! Chicken! The area is about to fill up with chickens. Kill as many as you can~. Aaand... go!"
The area around the three Knight begins filling with chickens. Crazy wild-eyed chickens who peck at anyone they see. Just make a "Kill Chicken Roll" cause I have no earthly idea how to properly script this.
Yup. Only a select few numbers count when I roll them. Exactly. Rule 63 didn't occur because I rolled it.
Yup. And I carry the Knight Princess roll.
She got a 78.
>Dog Knight has slain the most with 92 chickens! Their blood and entrails are nowhere to be seen as they soak into the ground, dissipating back to whatever dimension this freak came from.
The score is now 1-1-1. "Oh, this is a problem. I guess round 3 will be... OUR TIEBREAKER!"
"The rule is simple. Be the last one standing and win your fabulous tickets!"
"Oh also, this time, everyone gets a bunch of exploding rubber ducks. Enjoy~"
Exploding rubber ducks appear in each character's hands. It seems a single one could kill a person.
"Oh ah, right. Death is STILL not permanent."
"I cast Wild Growth!" Grasping roots now hold down Dog and Knight Princess.
However, before he can land the killing blows,
Dog Knight just tossed his whole load of ducks at Druid and blew him to kingdom come.
Having none left, Knight Princess gets an easy shot and blows him out of the arena, smashing right into an outstretched trident on a pile of gold.
"Vaaaaaantastic! Alright, here's your prize, 74 tickets! Oh right and um 'humbo jumbo mumbo wumbo, something about boobs, I resurrect the Dog and Druid Knights! Enjoy~"
In a puff of smoke, Mr... Van? disappears without another word. The Prize booth is still there. Knight Princess comments, "I guess I won, huh? Guess who will only ever make love to me and me alone? Hmm?"
She has a boastful look on her face as the party, still pretty damn confused, walks up to the prize counter. Knight Princess asks "Ah, what can we get for... 74 tickets?"
The cashier, thoroughly bored out of his mind, outfit soaked in chicken blood, says "A Laffy Taffy and 2 Bouncy Balls."
Do you accept the prize or save your tickets?
"The Curse of Vantastic shall endure for three rounds of his murder games every time any Hero rolls a 74, irrelevant of the time, location, or relative safety of the 'arena.'"
So not often, but still likely. Your Tickets will be shared between Knight Princess and Druid Knight if saved.
"Eh, no thanks. I'll save them, maybe buy something nice next time. Like a Whoopie Cushion! Or potentially super-power causing radioactive waste!"
Nope! 66 is Dark Embodied. 666 is Demonic Intervention.
100 points off from that goal, sorry.
The party makes the trek back through the treasure trove, back into the Entrance Tower, and back to Camp for a well-deserved rest.
I'm also going to be ending today. We'll finish off tomorrow in a new thread and then start in on Chapter 2.