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Hi! I'm here to join your party, I'mma...
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You are currently reading a thread in /tg/ - Traditional Games

Thread replies: 123
Thread images: 15
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Hi! I'm here to join your party, I'mma Fighter!
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THICK
THICK
how does that crown stay in her head
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>>45383870
hairpin
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>>45383870

There's a hairpin, man, the same way that ancient Chinese noblemen kept those tiny hats on.
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>>45383837
Buy yourself some armor first, then we'll talk. I want my meat-shields to be able to do their job without instantly dying thank you.
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>>45383837
sorry miss, our party is already full. You will have to look elsewhere.
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This is why we should have let the navicomputer complete the calculations, captains. I bet these guys don't even have combustion engines, much less spacefaring technology.

Still, let's see if they've got some prior guests.

UMM MA'AM DOO YOOOOU UUUUNDEEEEERSTAAAND MEEEE
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>>45383837
Yeah sure welcome aboard.
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>>45383837
Go away you damn slut.
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I see you're abiding by our dress code, which is good.

I'll just have to make sure those thighs are up to par, so I'll need to spend some time rubbing them.
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>>45383837
Sorry miss we already have a fighter.
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>>45383957
Also this
>>45383928
Exposed thighs might have been an acceptable trade off in whatever army you came from but here most of the thing we fight are rather short
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>>45383837
Rejected, we don't want to lug dead weight that gets stabbed in the groin/chest/head/etc. and then bleed out - or waste any healing spells/utilities on those sort of idiots.
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>It's a Fighter!
>That you can fuck!

How is this not an instant yes for you guys?
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>>45384042
Because you gain a bond with her and she'll betray you.
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>>45384069
>Betray you

I dunno about your dick, but ain't no one betraying my party after I lay pipe.

I took a feat.
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>>45384080
Look at her, she'll fuck you over man, can't trust these meaty fucks.
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>>45384027
You don't understand!
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>>45384011
Best figther.
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>>45384102
Man, you need to learn to optimize your dick properly.

Oh well, more for me.
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>>45384042
I'd be hard pressed to imagine a fighter you can't fuck. And don't say skeleton, been there, done that.
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>>45383837
GYI I'mma means "I'm going to".
You are not going to fighter, right?
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>>45384154
Most fighters don't come equipped with a skirt and thigh-highs.
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>>45383837
If you survive the first quest without any That Guy tier shit, I'll pitch in to help you get real armor.


But before that, we're going to get you some pants.
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>>45384042
I have many reasons, and I am not gonna even bother with the ones that can be encapsulated with "I don't give a fuck about women, relationships or sex".

First off, her armour leave parts of the body exposed just for sake of some sex appeal, thigh and groin are areas that should be protected.
She hasn't even bound her chest, which tells me that she isn't even particularly serious about her job.
It's not like she's poor, it looks like she is fucking royalty, but doesn't bother even getting proper headgear with her!
And her other equipment? A dagger or shortsword? Where's the sleeping gear, food, light sources, etc.?

Why would I bother with a wench when I could get a fighter that takes his or her job seriously, wearing proper armour, carrying equipment for dungeon-delving or whatever we are doing.

Plus on the experience, sex on job just brings misery and jealously to the party.
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>>45383837
Model and serial number?
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>>45384176
Well, that's true, but that's nothing a bit of dress up won't fix. And a bit of dress up before doing the nasty is part of the fun.
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>>45384203
>First off, her armour leave parts of the body exposed just for sake of some sex appeal
BONUS

>She hasn't even bound her chest
BONUS

>It's not like she's poor, it looks like she is fucking royalty,
BONUS

>Where's the sleeping gear, food, light sources, etc.?
She's using my tent with me. BONUS.

>sex on job just brings misery and jealously to the party.
Not if you're having sex with all of them.
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>>45384215
Should be written under the hood, check for yourself.
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>>45383837
If you join our party you're going to need to wear some full plate armour but only because it's my fetish
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>>45384102
Meaty bitches are the most trustworthy. I don't mean those short squat little fatties, those are sloots. I mean chicks with normal builds who know its fine and good to have a bit of meat on their bodies. Bitches who starve themselves have body telling them to fuck anything and everything before what it thinks is their inevitable demise. Plush women got a body that tell them its all good and she can waste time and energy on actually caring about who owns the dick getting put inside of her.
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>>45383928
What if she's an agile fighter concentrating on avoiding hits rather than tanking them?
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>>45384238
That's a violation of protocol! You know only the ManageComp is authorized to do that!
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>>45384232
>Not if you're having sex with all of them.
This guy knows what's up.
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>>45383837
Oh you poor dear... how do I break this gently... whoever sold you that armor and toy sword probably didn't have your best interests at heart. Here take this sword, we were going to sell it because... well, Thadwick is a cleric, and uses that giant stick of his. Evenrie is a rogue, and not to poke fun at her diminutive stature, but it's a little oversized for her. Essrayne over there, yes, the giant woman? The one 'at looks like she could crush that fellow that's hitting on her? Barbarian who followed us outta the wilds. I'm Steve by the way. Just Steve. Ranger, and between my bow, and my axes, I don't have the space for another weapon.
We booked a few rooms upstairs, so if you need to rest up, stick with me or Thadwick. We don't trust Eve or Ezzy since they took that cleric lass out for a night on the town. We'll get you something comfy and protective tommorow. Eve knows the local blacksmith from a fling last month, and has 'im wrapped 'round her finger. I'm fairly sure I know a chap who can get you some traveling gear on the cheap, 'n Thad said something about one ' the clrics at the church selling a horse. 'Was gonna buy it too, but we didn't know if people followin the notes 'd have a horse allready.
So... if you followed our little paper trail, you did better 'm the usual louts we get. What's your side ' the tail?
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>>45384403
......................................
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>>45384330
What can I say? I like my adventuring to be comfy.
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>>45384321
No excuse of atleast covering up weakspots with chain or leather padding at least.

Plus, the heavier armour is still relatively mobile.
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>>45384150
My dick is fine, you just can't trust fighters that think being meaty and plush can help you ever. Fucking is fine and all, but why would you trust a fuckbuddy?
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>>45384427
Is there an issue Sir?
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>>45384458
>that think being meaty and plush can help you ever.

I can't think of a time when the female next to me being meaty and plush could NOT help.
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>>45384479
>trusting someone like that to risk her life for you
What, you think she'll fucking save you? She isn't worth it.
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>>45384501
Of course I don't think she'll save me. Why would I need saving?
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She looks fun. and about as well armored as a roman legionnaire
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>>45384529
Because I don't trust people who think with their dicks. She isn't valuable for the team and is a fuck buddy, a thing to fuck, an extra mouth to feed when you're adventuring.
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>>45383837
sure, all you have to do is pass the fitness test with the same standards held to a male warrior.
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>>45384583
>an extra mouth to feed when you're adventuring.

I took a feat for that, and I eat a lot of pineapple.
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I don't know if no-one knows what she's from, or if you're all just pretending not to.
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>>45383837
> Join the party...
> In the middle of the dungeon begin telling stories of orc dicks
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>>45384601
Yeah, sure you do.
>>45384629
We all know where she's from.
Stupid bitch, should always kill everything in the forest.
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>>45384583
In the adventuring business, your biggest problem with food isn't expenses but logistics of the rations transport. Weight limit restrictions are a bitch. If she can carry her own share of rations, she is no hindrance. And If she can carry more than that, she's actually contributing.

>>45384601
>and I eat a lot of pineapple
Does it actually work? Besides, person can't be sustained on semen alone. /d/ did the research on that years ago.
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>>45384629
I don't know where she's from but I'm assuming porn
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>>45384629
Image search took 5 seconds. I don't see how that is relevant, though.
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>>45384711
>Does it actually work?
Seems to.

>Besides, person can't be sustained on semen alone.
I like to think of it more like one of those gummy vitamins. It's an important daily supplement, and they enjoy it too.
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>>45384711
She really doesn't look like she's gonna carry her own share, all she is a lazy excuse for a fighter.
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>>45383837
>Hi! I'm here to join your party, I'mma Fighter!
>cloak
>that emblem
Looks more like a fallen Paladin to me.
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>>45384793
You must see a whole lot of fallen paladins around if you consider "wears a cloak" to be one of the signs.
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>>45383837
One of the hottest hentai I've read, even though (or may because of it) I usually hate ntr.
Art was 10/10, that's for sure.
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>>45384793
Nope, Lord Knights are pretty solidly in the realm of Fighters.
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>>45383837

I take her a long for a simple reason; You don't know who's going to live or die when you go adventuring. Like, an adventuring party is already a very eclectic group. (Even more so in modern D&D, where you have all kinds of weird classes that don't fall neatly into the Fighter/Thief/Wizard/Cleric) dynamic.

What's the worse that could happen? We have an Inquisitor, a...I don't know what this guy does, but he's some kind of arcanist, one of the dozen unique spellcaster archetypes, and some kind of divine Sorcerer. Why the fuck not?
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>>45384829
Sauce?
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>>45384576
I suppose so.
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>>45383837
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>>45384759
Yeah, she does. I'm no expert on female physique but flat belly + curves generally means she's well fed and working out to keep herself in shape. (as opposed to just being slim, with might indicate poor nutrition). So she can take some strain.

This is excluding the possibility of plastic surgery or fantasy equivalent of flesh-sculpting and illusionary magic. But if she's capable of those, that's a merit in its own right.

Also I'm not judging how capable she would or wouldn't be in actual combat. So I wouldn't put her right at the front line before she can prove herself on less important skirmishes.
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>>45383837
OK
>>45383928
>implying it's not glamor'd +5 armor
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>>45383837
> xration
hoo boy
Also, you're clearly a princess not a fighter, you silly girl. Completely different ability set.
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>>45384873
Xration - Hime Kishi Tame
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>>45384812
>You must see a whole lot of fallen paladins around if you consider "wears a cloak" to be one of the signs.
Like you wouldn't believe. Lots of the suckers are jobless and fresh out of powers after 'That' happened and everyone kind of had to redefine their own morals. Which unfortunately the Universe/gods didn't agree with.
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>>45384829
Nah. It was pretty standard monster rape fair. I just become increasingly annoyed the more I see how the cute plush girl in the silly armor with the little crown never exists outside of monster rape porn.
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>>45384991
Be the change you want to see, Anon.

Play that cute girl with fat thighs in tights.
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>>45384928
Why wouldn't you have her fight with you? She has to prove herself somehow, and giving her underhand softball less important shit don't prove anything.
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>>45383898
Ancient Chinese Secret.
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>>45384991
>how the cute plush girl in the silly armor with the little crown never exists outside of monster rape porn.
Princess Maker?
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>>45385090
To small. More like the kind of princess who looks like she's one pregnancy away from being Milf Queen Deluxe.
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>>45385137
>the kind of princess who looks like she's one pregnancy away from being Milf Queen Deluxe
While I can see the appeal, that doesn't really bode well with "not a porn" part.
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I will *consider* allowing you to join us, but first take off that goofy ass crown. If you can actually prove you're not going to be a drag on the rest of us then the last thing we need having happen when we're on the road is bandits, or worse, a dragon trying to murder our faces off because your crown betrays how filthy rich we are.
What? You thought we were wearing these dirt caked duds because we were poor? Fuck no. The rogue could buy a small kingdom with all the shit she's stolen. Hell, i'm sure the wizard could fill a plane with all his treasure if he wasn't always spending it on or breaking it down for spell components and books. It's easier for us to walk around unmolested if we wear basic looking shit supped up with magic.
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>>45384829
>resolve myself to read source once I get to the end of the thread
>read this
>nope
Have I dodged a bullet?
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>>45383837
Y-you too
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>>45385354
It's not even NTR really.
Plus the orcs are bro-tier in it.
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>>45383928
Dude, she's wearing a gambeson, do you really think she's that thick, either physically or mentally?
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>>45385193
I don't have a problem with it being porn. I have a problem with it being monster rape porn. When is a character like that going to have a reason to be around in any setting that isn't highly ecchi at the very least.
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>>45385197
I will never understand why bandits consider guys dressed like successful adventuring parties to be a good target for molestation.

No potential big score is worth trying to mug a guy who murders things with bigger teeth than your forearm for a living.
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>>45385381
Her boyfriend watches her get raped during the entire first chapter. Thats pretty NTR.
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>>45385402
If your gear seems remotely nice and you're around chaotic evil types, like in anything remotely post apoc, people are going to shank the FUCK out of you and take your stuff. A survival mechanism is to stick garbage and dirt to all your nice things.
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>>45385441
>First
Last chapter you mean. Fuck him, he had it coming.
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>all these "Oh I am so serious of a roleplayer so I wouldnt fuck this woman let me tip my fedora" posts

Holy fuck. Lighten up a bit you pathetic neckbeards.
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>>45385465
Again though, professional adventurers, high level ones by the sound of your last post.

We're talking the fantasy equivalent of being sat in the bushes with a shitty handgun you found in a dumpster, seeing a team of special ops guys rolling down the road in a tank, and thinking "yeah, I'm going to fucking take that tank!"
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>>45385574
>Again though, professional adventurers, high level ones by the sound of your last post.

NPCs don't understand game mechanics.

>seeing a team of special ops guys rolling down the road in a tank, and thinking "yeah, I'm going to fucking take that tank!"
Nah. Its more like the situation where there's a car full of operators in a traffic jam and the jihadis think "Now's our chance."

There's no particular reason for bandits to think that they can't shank high level adventurers for their shit, especially since those high level adventurers probably shanked the prior owners, and how Criminal: The Class can be of any power level. No matter how subtle the wizard, a knife between his shoulderblades will cramp his style, etc. etc.
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>>45383837
Please tell me you're either Dex-based or that's Glamered armor.
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>>45384027
>we don't want to lug dead weight that gets stabbed in the groin/chest/head/etc
Ironic given your picture.
>>
You fetishshitters know about boorus, right? They have more generic weebshit than you'll ever be able to browse.
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>>45385465
Chaotic Evil isn't Chaotic Stupid, nor Chaotic Lemming.
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>>45384711
>your biggest problem with food
What kind of adventurer has problems with food? Are you not eating your kills like a proper hunter?
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>>45386529
You do realise that there's armour on underneath that tabard, right? That he's not going into battle with a helmet, arm armour, leg armour and a dress?
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>>45386589
It's ironic because you posted a picture from fucking Dark Souls. You know, that vidya series where the guy dies a lot? Where that armor is literally taken off a corpse.
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>>45386632
>that vidya series where the guy dies a lot
GIT GUD
I
T

G
U
D
>>
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>>45384455
what an incredible display of speed and agility
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>>45386799
What an incredible display of combat techniques.
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>>45386826
Are you implying that rolling around on the ground has any place in combat?
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>>45386826
>rolling
>combat techniques

Stop playing Dark Souls.
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>>45386873
>>45386882
>>>she's running around fighting with protection because muh backflips and animays
>>heavy armour is mobile enough for any type of maneuver you want to try in combat, look you can even do forward rolls in them
>YOU DON'T ROLL ON THE GROUND IN COMBAT LELEL
But you still run around in a dress doing backflips, right?
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>>45386882
No.
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>>45386799
>'armor = stumbling tin can' meme
People can do cartwheels in armor, run about as fast as if unarmored, and generally do all the things they need to do in a fight.
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>>45384403
Underrated
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>>45387637
>People can do cartwheels in armor
>as if unarmored
>>45384455
this gif shows otherwise
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>>45386799
Who's the jiggly dancing man at the end of the rope?
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>>45388343
You don't even know if that guy could do cartwheels unarmoured.
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>>45386589
I thought it was because the subject is undead, and thus not terribly inconvenienced by being stabbed in the groin etc.
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>>45388343
Catwheels around 0:30
Also running, jumping, jumping jacks, pushups, carrying other people
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzTwBQniLSc

There are numerous videos of people in armor doing this kind of stuff.
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>>45383837
Get ready to get beat to shit cause these casters can't deal with a few spiders near them or whatever excuse they have this week
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>>45383870
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>>45384576
I suppose that is a good point

Although the legionnaires had shields but your mostly right.
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>>45384455
I know you're trying to convince him but the nigga in the gif is fat rolling.
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>>45390176
Still rolling
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>>45390441
If you like eating shit when a nigga brings a mace, sure. It's rolling. After a fashion.
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>>45384321
Then she's an idiot who doesn't understand how long we'll be fighting, how ambushes will affect our party and that every fight may involve some means of immobilizing us.
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>>45388485
As an English fag I love the person who made this.

Armour. Armouuuur....
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>>45386882
>he took it seriously
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>>45383837
We're playing Anima. I hope you have a good Style stat, because it's a waste to walk around like that without having the skill to flaunt it.
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>>45387734
Thank you anon. I just wish I hadn't written it at 2 in the morning. I might not have misspelled tale.
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>>45384027
>Posts picture of darksouls
>dead weight
Do you even fast roll?
>>
>>45386799
>an obvious novice
>an obvious expert

Totally fair comparison, bro. You should balance the universe, your opinion is so well informed and your rationale so bullet proof.
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