>>45234566 You wasted those dubs on this shit post. Do you feel good now, faggot? You wasted good dubs on that! THEY COULD HAVE GONE TO SOMEONE IN NEED! THEY COULD HAVE MADE A DAY; BUT YOU WASTED THEM!
>>45236171 Exactly. They don't effect women, and visa versa. So lesbians would theoretically be able to wield ultra fragile magic swords. There's no yin-yang transfer from lesbian sex, so the magical enchantment would be preserved from defiling energies.
>>45236414 but why ONLY lesbians? Sounds like what it would be looking for is virgins, in the classical sense. A lesbian might still have received dickings, forcibly or just because it's the done thing. And I'm still not seeing the link between gentleness and whether you've received a dicking.
>>45236093 >>45236242 >'fuckstick' and 'cummer' are rules terms >consult Vaginal Circumference Potential and Ripped Orifice in Chapter 3 >everything about the Jar of Jacking Off Even after all this time I continue to be amazed at FATAL
A pocket watch from another dimension where time travels backwards, it carries a bit of it's origin's peculiarity and makes the time around it go backwards when activated. Problem is, whenever someone activate it, it instantly deactivate itself for obvious reasons.
>>45240214 This is why I hate SCP. There are some interesting, well thought out ones, and then there are fucking dumb ones like hoodies. I remember reading one about a creature that takes the shape of a jar of toenails. It's just shameful.
>>45244671 But it should be depression if they fail to blow themselves but succeed in not breaking their neck.
Presumably the authors of FATAL have tried many a time to blow themselves but never made it, and assumed it was physically impossible, but presumably the rules of FATAL imply that a dude can have a penis stupidly large enough to blow by craning their neck forward slightly.
Just one of the many oversights in the rules that prevent FATAL from winning Game Of The Year All Years
>>45246630 They didn't remove all of it, they just removed all the bits where rape was added onto an otherwise unrelated SCP to make it edgier. I think it was mostly one of the head writers, who used to have a habit to put rape in everything, just going back through his old entries and cleaning up.
I read a bunch of 'strange' fiction, and here's some of my favourite magic items in them. They're more suited to a modern world, so something like World of Darkness
An Adjustable Umbrella - This colourful rainbow umbrella has a dial so you can turn down your umbrella and filter out the low quality raindrops, to recieve the best raindrop that the weather designers have created in the day's precipitation.
Shadow-cutting Knife - This used and unassuming kitchen knife, wrapped in black cloth, is unable to cut through anything but the tenebrous. It cuts shadows deeply and easily, and it is even able to completely, permanently and painlessly cut them off the object casting the shadow itself. Some treat the shadow as a delicacy to be prepared simply, fried with a dash of sunflower oil.
Molten Rose - A small apothecary vial with two tubes (one for the intake of water, another for seeds) that contains within it a single molten rose, an unstable jet of color and fragrance, whirling against the glass. Scars can be seen along the inner surface of the container. What appears to be throrns within the fluid shifts against the glass, following it's repetitive elliptical current.
??? - A nameless sword, coarse and battle-worn. A zipper begins near it's hilt and spans the length of the flat of the blade. A few short tugs on its tab and the steel comes loose, revealing a layer of soft material that swells and reddens upon the exposure to open air. The understeel is warm and tender to the touch like an open wound.
Flintlock Automaton - An iron mannequin with knots of jellied sawdust around gunpowder-coated copper wires as its brain. The hammer and frizzen of a firing mechanism rests between its two lobes, positioned so they can remain exposed outside of the android's metal skull. A single idea, emotion, or task is all that the automaton can manage, as its brain is entirely destroyed the moment it is triggered.
>>45252389 One more. It's hard to rework the excellent prose into item descriptions, but there's a lot of well written stuff out there. SCPs sucks because most people don't fucking know how to write.
Taxidermy Rabbit - This mechanical taxidermy rabbit was once the prize prey of a hunter. Its fur has been stuffed with wooden bones and glass organs, an artificial blood made of blackberry syrup, gunpowder and crushed fireflies (amongst other things), pumps in its crystalline veins. It had been commissioned by the hunter to let him relive the moment of his triumph over nature, but it was unable to be paid for. Despite it's realistic visage and its ability to move, it is clear from its behaviour that it is not the animal it once was. For its legs bend in strange directions, and its head only ever face north.
>>45253423 They're from are from 'North of Reality' by UEL ARAMCHEK. It's a short fiction project, updated every few days. A few are just short enough copy and paste. So here's one
Books in Jars:
Magnetic ink was an intriguing literary innovation, in that it allowed for books to be stored without the use of paper. Through liquid encoding, each cluster of molecules could remember the alphabet and sequence it belonged to previously, allowing the words to arrange themselves autonomously once splattered against a surface. Ultimately, this led to the phenomenon of storing books in jars as pools of undifferentiated ink, where they waited for surfaces upon which to imprint themselves.
As one might expect, this led to experimentation. Liquid books were mixed and shaken, forcing the words within to compromise on their ordering. The results were surprisingly intelligible, revealing that pattern and plot could somehow survive the combinatoric chaos of fluid dynamics. Cookbooks could be combined with one another to rapidly permute recipes, or with fiction to lead towards previously impossible flavors. Fiction and nonfiction showed surprising affinity; they seemed to recognize something in one another as they entangled. “It could be said that the books are reading each other when we combine them,” one scholar noted. “What worries me is that they seem to also understand each other.”
The most terrifying results were not recognized until decades later, after certain volumes had been allowed to ferment in an Oxford wine cellar. After persisting for too long unprinted, these restless works of literature had become authorless grimoires and volumes of horror previously unwritten. Analysis showed that the ink had learned how to read its own contents by printing against itself repeatedly, resulting in complex, pathological deviations of plot that reflected the personality of each jar. Only a handful of characters ever managed to survive the fermented editions of their novels.
>>45256265 Actually, the show's creators have consistently referred to gems as a one-gender-race. All gems are female, and thanks to the recent episodes showing us the distant past, we know that gender isn't something the Crystal Gems picked up from humans; all gems consider themselves female.
>>45236242 Am I a powergamer for immediately thinking about the implications of d4 damage over d4 miles? It looks like a reasonably common item too, given that it's found on a 1-50 on the relevant treasure table.
You could very well kill most of the low-level population of a town, even with one of these things, not to mention the ecological damage.
I'd have a tough time picking out my favorite items I've read about, but to date my favorite magic items I've made for my party include:
A cloak that is lined with really comfy fur on one side and is embroidered cloth using golden thread that depicts a lost city on the other. It grants the wearer constant immunity to hot and cold weather depending on what side you're wearing in.
A delicate pair of golden spectacles that grant the user an inherent +10 to Appraise and allow them to instantly know the value of any item worth less than 10k gold (and make educated guesses on items worth more than 10k.)
A quiver of chaotic arrows that use a d3 to determine the size of the arrow fired and a d10 to determine what kind of effect the arrow has (there was shit like ele damage, tripping, smoke, nothing at all, two effects, etc.)
None of them are particularly flashy, but they're pretty flavorful and that's what I wanted most out of the items.
>>45257368 They never outright stated it, they said that they have to do something horrible to her, and that anyone working with that SCP who request memory wipes are granted them, no questions asked. Also that whatever it is they do, it necessitates that the SCP be horribly traumitized, so they mindwipe her every three times, so she doesn't become numb to it.
>>45251736 'whenever a male holds this shield' - so presumably any time you have it in your hand, all you can think about is how good a weapon your dick would make the more important part to rule lawyer is really how smacking people around with your 3ft dick works - is unleashing your penis a free action? does it take any kind of action to unleash it? is it even possible RAW because no real action is associated with it? furthermore does 'and smack opponents for damage like a hammer' mean that it immediately targets all opponents when it's unleashed, or that it can be wielded like a hammer and requires you to actively attack with it, or that it attacks independently of yourself? the possibilities are endless.
it may just be possible to unleash your dick from your pants and instantly kill everybody in the room before you've even started your turn
>Squirrrel's Delight An enchanted acorn with an iron cap, every hour it will regrow it's shell and fruit from the cap. Can be planted once, and will quickly grow into a perfectly tall, thick, and fruitful tree.
>Bare Bear's Bear Bare A whipped, brown tortose colored cream that, if rubbed on bare skin, grows out coarse, dark brown fur, staying there as the cream turns to plaster and sets into a leathery fabric. Adored by taxidermists. Noted with a warning; Beware of Bears, Buffalo, Wills, Cans, Hads, If It Is', and 가.
>Cup of Witholding This simple chalice seems to be designed by a fool- having a perfect spout on the bottom for which water channels through. However, undrinkable fluids never pass it's mouth.
>>45250293 >>45240559 >>45240214 Luckily shit like this gets deleted within a day or so. >>45257599 >>45244730 >tfw wiki oldfag of many years >Tfw quality has fallen overall since we reached to 2000 series >tfw SJW type bullshit and edgy teen fanfic trash is slowly creeping/ not getting deleted anymore.
>>45256971 You better believe it, it's way too popular to ever be removed. It's why I never understand people complaining about rape being removed when Rape: The SCP is still alive and well. http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-231
I seem to recall them changing the censorship so they were no longer implying that the subject girl could have an age in the single digits but I must have remembered wrong, that's still there.
>>45258246 my intention was that yes. However it would also be funny if it was marked "No undrinkable fluid may pass my spout" and it just so happens that they were being literal, as you could drink anything from water to molten pewter uninhibited; it's simply not advisable to drink.
>>45258308 I think they actually changed it to be worse. I recall seeing somebody commenting that at least the minimum age of the girl was listed in double digits, and somebody then commenting he changed it to single digits to make it worse.
>>45258462 They must have changed it. I do remember the genderbender rock, but back when I read it there was less SJW gender identity faggotry and shitty le wacky scientist memes about them using the rock to prank people.
>>45258532 Yes. She's pregnant with the spawn of Cthulhu or whatever, and for some reason they can't just kill her or remove the fetus, so they have to keep temporarily killing it/stopping it's gestation with some procedure strongly implied to involve rape.
Consider the difference between a carrot and chewed bubble gum. The carrot will stretch very little before breaking. The chewed bubble gum, on the other hand, will plastically deform enormously before finally breaking.
>>45258755 >One final note: The Foundation does many distasteful things in the completion of our mission, but our mission is important enough that the price is one we must pay. Containment of SCP-231 is one of our most dangerous duties, not because of any direct danger to ourselves (like SCP-682) but because of the danger that our resolve will fail, that we will allow ourselves to either let down our guard due to sympathy for the suffering of an innocent, or that we will allow ourselves to become monsters through the performance of monstrous acts. Just do your jobs, and save the philosophizing for the shrink.
I like this SCP just because of this part right here. They don't care about unleashing another horrifying monster thing since they can kill it and they don't care about casualties, they keep it to remind everyone who works there that what they do there can be pretty fucked up, but it has to be done.
At the same time, this SCP contradicts that message and also embodies the underlying sense of "is this really necessary? is what they're doing really okay and for the right reasons?" that permeates a lot of SCP articles, because they keep this thing around NOT because it's necessary, but only as a reminder.
>>45258188 I blame the day they decided to make artivles killing off shit SCPs instead of just deleting, too many SCPs that interact with others and all the cult of personality that formed around some SCPs or members. It's unsalvagabe now.
>>45258877 That seems really dumb. "Just do your jobs, and save the philosophizing for the shrink" seems to directly contradict the idea that they're only keeping it there as a reminder of some kind of mission statement. Why are you citing that contradiction as evidence? It doesn't make any sense.
>>45258877 I guess if that's what they're trying to get across then fine, but the SCP still doesn't sit well with me.
I should submit the idea I had about a urinal that allows you to talk to historical figures that walk up and use the urinal next to you, whether there's a urinal there or not. Man or woman, doesn't matter, a historical figure walks up and has a piss next to you.
>>45258751 >it's basicly just saying the object doesn't do shit to the mind and that theres no bullshit like the "gaining a female soul" you get in Japanese fiction. It was also saying dumb shit like the stone reads your mind and tries to fit your "ideal gender identity" including "nonbinary gender identities" instead of just being a weirdo genderbender rock.
And the fact that said bullshit was included in what's supposed to be a scientific report is what got me eyes rolling.
>>45258999 You don't socialize with people in public restrooms?
It's a captive fucking audience. Some people don't wanna talk to you but you can pick up on that with just body language and what not. Others are ready to have a chat over a piss, doesn't matter to them.
>>45259026 Semi-mundane scps are always more interesting because they're almost always more likely to hit the suspension of disbelief zone.
>>45259057 Not him, but in general where I'm from it's frowned upon. It can happen, especially if you are already in conversation when you go in, but we're unlikely to initiate it.
We also have a thing about trying not to occupy adjacent urinals, and possibly stalls, if there's any other spots available. And for some reason I just remembered the second Lije Bailey novel by Asimov, where he goes to the planet with one person per 20,000 miles or so. They get actual panic attacks if they see a person physically. I wonder if the low population density is a factor to our own taboo?
Object SCPs tend to be okay. I like that tank who fires by himself and the camera that shows what others are thinking (and then they felt the need to use the camera on their fucking awful characters because I surely care about what those do).
>>45258931 >Just do your jobs, and save the philosophizing for the shrink seems more to me like "don't question what we do here".
I should also have clarified more that the second part isn't really the article itself but more what I think is kind of a neat layer to it. It's certainly serving a purpose in SCP, like the inverse of "team morale". Everyone has to know it's there and it exists so they remember they do terrible shit working for SCP and absolutely cannot fail to do it. But at the same time, it's arguable if it's justified to keep torturing someone for just that.
They torture someone just to remind the workers that they do bad shit at the facilities, which is pretty fucked up and pointless. But at the same time it can kind of be seen as serving a point because it reminds people that they do bad shit so no one who works there is ever unprepared to do bad shit where it really counts, because that will have REAL consequences. It adds to the morally gray nature of the SCP Foundation as a whole.
>>45258877 Don't forget the fact that each time they tried to stop it and she gave birth, the results gained in power each time.
No, we have not given up trying to save SCP-231-7, but research in that field must be carried out with the utmost of caution. Based on the increased potency of each subsequent ████████████ event associated with each subsequent SCP-██ specimen, there is a strong possibility that SCP-231-7's ████████████ event could result in an XK class end-of-the-world scenario. This information is corroborated in notebooks recovered from the cultists (see document "Seven Brides, Seven Seals," SCP-231-Adjunct B). No, putting the poor girl out of her misery is NOT an option. Neither is drugging her. She has to be aware of what is going on for 110-Montauk to work.
Anyways, is it possible that it's really just something done to make a statement? Look at SCP-2317
>>45259299 >They torture someone just to remind the workers that they do bad shit at the facilities, which is pretty fucked up and pointless. Except the implication you've made here is that they do it JUST to remind the workers that they do bad shit, and not for any other reason. To begin with, I find that assumption baseless. A fucking ton of shit in SCP eschews any sort of relationship with physics as we know them. There's no reason to believe that they don't have to do this in order to prevent whatever abomination is in there from being birthed: that possibility was invented by you. Second of all, even if this was the case, it's safe to assume that it was not a shrink who ordered this kind of thing to take place, which would mean that whoever is saying the statement >Just do your jobs, and save the philosophizing for the shrink." is being actively hypocritical.
For what is released from the seven seals of the seven brides.
Oh, and the current iteration of SCP-231 is the seventh one. Because she dies each time she gives birth and is then re-born (or when she commits suicide.) So we are on SCP-231-7. And it's related to SCP-2317.
Also, if you go to it on mobile there's secret files you can open.
It's subtle and ties into SCP-001: 05 and http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-001-05 SCP-001 http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-001.
And it's possible that what SCP-231 gives birth to is the full form of SCP-058 (note that the births are only two blacked out numbers so it has to be an SCP from 1-99.)
It's much more than just a shock piece, but one of the better interactive "mysteries" that exists on the site.
All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.
This is a 4chan archive - all of the shown content originated from that site. This means that 4Archive shows their content, archived. If you need information for a Poster - contact them.
If a post contains personal/copyrighted/illegal content, then use the post's [Report] link! If a post is not removed within 24h contact me at email@example.com with the post's information.