i mena tabletop didn't directly cost me a relationship, but while gaming i saw my (then current) girl's true colors and some convictions she actually had
the thing is she was a shit roleplayer and she told me her little secret is to act like she would act in any given situation but without any kind of filter and it was very liberating for her because she got to be a total asshole towards NPCs with the excuse of "it's what my character would've done/said" and i found out a shitton of tiny details that bothered me a lot and i had to let her go so i wouldn't end up getting tied in crazy shit
I was talking to a cute girl, and I mentioned that I play tabletop games. She laughed and said I should probably not tell that to girls. I told her that if the worst thing a girl found out about me was that I play D&D, then it's a good day.
My relationships have cost me my time with tabletop games. I tried very hard to find wife potential in someone who likes my hobbies as I do, but unfortunately all my ex-girlfriends and my wife only tolerate my enjoyment and want nothing to do with it themselves. Although, my wife has helped me with color mixing advice to achieve fine tones.
>>44743276 PS: look for good people, not fitting interests if the person fits, one can follow the other, that's why I found a good girl and then started nerdifying her She's better than one of my buddies at CS:GO already, seems to like platformers as well and actually thanked me for showing her oprtal when she finished it, I'm not sure how to get her into strategy games though
I always get a bit too serious about the campaigns I run. Cost me some friends in high school. My ex didn't like how much time I spent playing D&D so she broke up with me (well it's more complicated than that but that's the ghist of it)
>Invite friend to table >He turns into a total asshole, acting like he knows everything about the game, but only basing it off his MMO skills >Talks down to other players when they make common mistakes, or even do things correctly that he just assumed from his MMO days went another way >Would heavily blame other players for his mistakes which he would make excuses for out the ass. >Rest of the group was shitty in their own ways, disband whole group, but MOSTLY because of him >Immediately find new group >He was the only one I didn't tell about it because he kept assuming he was my best player and without those other scrubs holding him back, we could be great. >New group gaming at FLGS >Three months later >He walks in while I have a table of 8 people >He was there to buy some cards for a new TCG he got into. >Silently left >Never brought up D&D again to me
Reaaally awkward when I showed up for his birthday, but other than that, it was mostly fine.
Not me, but it seems to keep costing my friends their relationships. Two motherfuckers in our group are completely repellant to all women ever and the rest of us tend to be pretty annoying anyway so it kinda makes sense.
>>44745633 In my experience, sorta. Most gaming groups I see in hobby shops are like that but with both groups I have with friends its more of a mix. If anything, playing with friends has made most of my once-spergy friends considerably less socially inept. As for overweight, yeah, generally, but you'll usually find skinny fucks that enjoy it just as much as anyone else in almost any given group.
>>44745633 No, no it's not. People of all weight and sociability play. I'm pretty socially awkward though I'm a skinny fucker. No one at my campaign's table is overweight and in fact one of them is still pretty ripped from being in the navy.
>>44739944 Hell yeah. I tend to date crazy girls and when they hear I do tabletop, they always beg to come along since they love "nerdy things. That always blows up since they get bored or try to make it about themselves and get mad when I tell them to stop being an idiot.
That or a girl will join by coming with someone else and they almost always come onto me, I always shoot them down, and I piss off the person who brought the chick since they wanted to fuck them.
One time, I even got slapped at the table by a girl who I turned down. Friend got mad at me because "I didn't let her down gently" and that I "was a blunt asshole."
Whatever. Girls just ruin most games they come into contact with. Guys are better. Both as fellow players and romantic partners.
>>44748030 >Then for gay guys, half of them have HIV and then the other half are obnoxious flamboyant faggots Then HIV thing is only a serious concern if you live in a fag-heavy state like Commiefornia or something. Same goes for the flaming gay thing.
Here in Texas, most of the gays I meet are pretty decent people who just happen to be gay, not letting their sexuality determine their personality.
However, if you only go gay for qt trap boys, you do end up with a good deal of trouble, since many of them are fucked in the head in some way. Not as bad as a woman, but still really fucking annoying. Best bet is to play both sides and try to pick the best you can deal with. >>44748087 >Girls just ruin most games they come into contact with >Girls are dumb and way too much trouble. Yes, I said those things and I stand by them. I'm no robot, but those pathetic NEETs are right. Girls ruin most everything they join.
There's so much cringe in this thread. I've gamed with a few girls. One of them didn't roleplay much, and an other insist for all of her characters to be gay. That's kinda creepy but it doesn't come up in gam emost of the time, so whatev's. Others were okay. Girls are people, just like guys. If you don't understand this either you're an irredeemable dumbass or you only ever met bitches.
>>44748326 But I don't have problems. My group is fun and every other group I've been with in the past has been fun. It's only when a girl shows up and brings drama that it stops being fun.
The commonality is girls.
Look, I don't hate women. I'm just saying that they tend to make fun things not fun, at least in my experience, so much so that I would recommend that others just game with the same gender. I'm glad you have fun in your group, however.
>>44739944 Yes, but it was back in middle-school where we thought "had sex twice and then fought about it" constituted a relationship.
She gave me records of an ERP she played with a bunch of people (she was a very sexually mature middle-schooler. Don't know if it was her hormones or anything. She literally did more porn than me, and she was REALLY into ERP).
I told her that her character is shallow as all fuck, the sex scenes aren't realistic and the writing is abominable. And I pointed out spelling errors.
She left me, the bitch. But at least I don't have to read anymore stories where "lesbian" means "fists up to the elbow as a greeting".
>>44748485 She was fucking OBSESSED with it. We never could get there in real-life and I don't think she even liked the idea so much physically, but when she wrote lesbians (WHICH WAS ALL THE FUCKING TIME. FOR HOW MUCH SHE LIKED DICK SHE SURE AS FUCK LIKED WRITING ABOUT LESBIANS) it was done SO OFTEN, SO BADLY, SO MUCH that it was just unbearable. Complete virgins who have never met each other (but it's okay: she knows the other one's a lesbian because, I shit you not, SHE SAW A YURI MAGAZINE IN HER DRAWER THE DAY BEFORE) pull their pants off anyplace, anytime, and after about three seconds fingering to get wet (-er. Of course, by the time the pants are down they're wet enough to make puddles on the floor beneath them) IN GOES THE ENTIRE FUCKING ARM.
In my experience, no. My current table has no one overweight, no hygiene issues, and are generally socially functional. The most autistic thing about us is that everyone but one player is an engineer, so we have our own set of issues.
>>44748400 >Sounds like you need to stop hanging out with redpiller faux-alpha type fuckboys if you get into "fights" over women. Don't be naive. It doesn't have to be an overt brawl, or even an argument. If the group is four guys and a woman, something is going to give. That doesn't mean women shouldn't be allowed to play, but one has to at least acknowledge the effect a woman's presence has on a group like that.
>>44748464 >But at least I don't have to read anymore stories where "lesbian" means "fists up to the elbow as a greeting". Physically cringed.
>>44745633 It really depends. Some players are the "I sit around reading books and playing games all day so I'm overweight" kind, others are the "I poured all my energy for a couple days into making this sheet, wait when did I last eat" skinny type, while the grand majority just fall somewhere in-between.
As for socialness, the idea that they're "socially awkward" is a bit of a misnomer. They wouldn't be playing games if they were legitimately antisocial (or at the least they get kicked out very quickly for doing so). Tabletop games, even the competitive ones, are a social game that require communication and interaction. Some people have tabletops as their main source of all interactions and so get very good at communicating there (but nowhere else), while others expand upon to be good at talking with anybody from the lessons they learn playing games.
>>44743640 Youve never HAD relationship have you? Sure there has to be a connection but you don't have to be interested in every damn thing they are. My wife plays the occasional board game, otherwise not interested in gaming. She enjoys watching terrible police procedural shows, which other than a rare gem like Hannibal i cannot abide. We both love Ghost in the Shell. There is crossover to be had man. If we both were in each others shit all day we would kill each other. plus my initial attraction to her was her huge rack, not her knowledge of the GiTS universe.
>>44739944 >Had a great boyfriend >We both love roleplay so we form a group with some other friends >Have lots of fun >Notice he's getting kind of weird with me and more distant >Find he he got one of the other players drunk and had sloppy mansex with them even though the other guy wasn't even homo >Desperately doesn't want me to find out, find out anyways >Accuses me of doing the same and throws a tantrum when I prove I didn't >completely ditches me and manfucks everyone he can get his hands on >Finally drops off the face of the world >Find out 3 years later that he got massively obese and suffered both a heart attack and a stroke at separate times. >Still gaming with the other two guys and having a great time
The reverse, actually. A while back some friends tried to set me up with a reasonably attractive gal who hangs out at one of the game stores in my area. She was a lot of fun to game with, and if that was as far as it went I'd have given it a shot.
But at one point I heard her getting into a discussion with the store owner (a lunatic) about the ongoing cops vs. minorities tension. Apparently her stance was, "Kill 'em all and let God sort 'em out." Didn't much care which side she was talking about, I don't need that kind of crazy in my life.
>>44763897 >Its weird and creepy that a guy likes to cook and clean. Wait what? I was under the impression that women loved a guy who could cook, and who kept himself and his space clean Am I going insane
I've had a girl break the fuck down and flip out on me when I it really sunk in that I wanted to be the primary chore doer and the cooker. It just would not click with her. I hat to explain it three times.
People like a guy that "picks up" after himself but always has in the back of their mind that guys are naturally messy. They dont like it when a guy actively deep cleans. It catches them off guard and challenges their concepts of what a man is.
Cooking and cleaning is like meditation to me. Its my crack. I could never be in a relationship unless my partner let me do most if not all of the cooking and cleaning.
>>44764127 >how is cooking for someone NOT looking after them?
Because cooking outside of barbecuing and other "manly" forms of cooking is traditionally a female past time. Its nice when the guy does it every once in a while but that's it. If the guy cooks a lot that means in the social contract women are expected to do something else to make their keep. They dont want to give cooking up.
>>44748413 I really wish this wasn't true. I'm the only guy in my social click that has a girlfriend. And even then a girl I barely talk to dumped a friend because she had feelings for me.
I was very clear I already was ain a relationship so i didn't really figure that bit out. But the bitterness is real. But then again, i think i am the only socially competent person that's does not look like a slavic war criminal.
>>44764127 >>44764203 Depends on the type of cooking. Gourmet cooking is traditionally seen as a male profession. So is simply any form of cooking which is highly complex and/or requires expert timing, coordination or reflexes.
>>44767895 Welcome to the bitterness wrought by being lied to by every romantic comedy movie ever made, and then being told to "Suck it up lol she doesn't owe you anything" after being strung along like fucking christmas lights for 6+ months.
>>44768044 People absolutely don't owe you anything. Acting like a decent human being doesn't entitle you to any sort of intimacy, sexual or otherwise. Quit acting like an entitled sperglord and respect yourself enough to not have such a twisted world view.
>>44768334 Don't bother, anon. He's dug himself in so deeply into his defense mechanisms that an army wouldn't be able to dig him out. It's up to him to understand how things work, or he'll just spend the rest of his life self-righteously telling himself that the grapes are sour and he's only alone because others aren't worth it.
Not the same anon but I don't want to give up on a bittered soul. I was the same once, and this could lead to a path of hatred and resentment towards women. Don't become one of those Redpill ranters and read No More Mr. Niceguy. People tell me that self-help books are shit, but this book opened a world of possibilities and information for me.
>>44768334 >people don't owe you anything! >no one is allowed to have feelings or emotions about anything unless I personally think it's a valid thing to have feelings about No one owes you food either, but I bet you'd be right pissed if everyone around you told you you're not allowed to eat and wouldn't ever give you or help you get food.
>>44769136 >I'd stop feeling sorry for myself and go get a job so I could eat >get a job Sure >So I could eat No one sells you any food, and when your employer finds out about you wanting to eat he fires you. You're be upset.
>>44769146 The problem that you're having is entirely your own bud, your situation is absolutely nothing like the hypothetical you're trying to push. I'm sorry if it isn't what you wanna hear and I'm not trying to knock you down, I just really can't stand when people have a situation they aren't happy with and choose to just roll around in it and blame the world rather than do something about it.
>>44769264 > your situation is absolutely nothing like the hypothetical you're trying to push. It absolutely is >no one lets you have sex >if you try to get sex on your own, you get punished >if you tell people you want sex, people get mad and you might get fired if you make the wrong people mad
>>44769287 People get mad at you because you act like the whole world is against you flailing on top of some poor girl. You need to stop acting like there's some magical force preventing you from fucking someone and take some responsibility and make some changes, chiefly to your attitude towards life in general.
>>44769307 Downloading things without paying, but guess what everyone does with impunity.
You're a jackass, but far worse than that, you're delusional and you're pushing it on others. You can pay for sex. No matter where you live, I can guarantee you there's someone within an hour's ride by bus, tops, whom you can pay for sex. It's probably not nearly as far.
But you won't do that, because what you're looking for isn't sex, it's self-validation. And you dread the moment that would come after sex, when you'd have to come to terms with the fact that even now that you did it, you're not yet happy. And of course, you'll immediately put up a battery of excuses like how it "didn't really count" because she was a prostitute, or how it's worthless because you have to pay for it, or because her pimp's not a nice man, but at the end of the day you'd know that is it. Making excuses is a hell of a lot easier than changing yourself for the better, but guess which one has an ice-cube's chance in a blast furnace of actually making you happier at some point down the road (not to mention everyone around you, unless you conform to the sorry stereotype to the point of interacting only with those who would confirm your biases like your social life is one big cognitive circlejerk).
>>44769404 >>44769410 >>44769428 >>44769444 >All these Just World fallacy spewing normalfags Yes, I'm sure the reason that there are people who are involuntarily celibate is because 100% of them are just plain bad people.
The problem is in the social contract. Traditionally for a mid line family the female was expected to look after the baby, keep house, and cook. The man was expected to win home and bread. For all intents and purposes the man was the woman's employer. Back then this was considered fairly equal. To preform these duty's women had to go to market daily for food. Go to the well or river daily for water. Cooking normally took hours of preparation. Homes were of poor quality with many openings that let dirt and grime in. This is all without a child. The time and energy multiples with each additional child. With so much work involved it shifting responsibility from man to woman and vice versa was fine. Both were equal at the end and it was more about getting everything done to stay alive and healthy.
All this changed with modern technology. The social contract became more and more slanted in the woman's favor. Going to the well turned to turning on your kitchen tap. Going to market turned into a weekly or monthly event with refrigeration. With improvements to comes dirt and grime only started accumulating in key areas that with vigilance was easy to keep in check with modern cleaning tools and chemicals. Even taking care of children was made easier with toys and children's programming.
Soon the man worked all day and the woman worked for an hour a day give or take. This greatly favors the woman. When a man wants to start taking on responsibility's from the females side of the social contract it means she now has to take responsibility's from the male side something they do not want to do at all since it is so greatly slanted in their favor in to days society. This why there is such a strong backlash against men who like to clean and cook and want to be the primary chore doer. Now there is nothing on the females side of the social contract.
>>44769483 >Definitely not all of them, but you certainly are. There you go again with that bullshit. You don't know anything about me outside the context of my posts which could be partial or total fabrications. But because you disagree with what I post that means I must be an awful person in reality.
>>44739944 no, but it did bring up some things that made me realize what an awful person I am.
>one of my best friends is a girl, known eachother since we were 12-13 (shes a year older) >She's fat, but not obese in any way. Actually does a lot of swimming and occasionally goes on walks with me >not the best of GM's, but she's fair - for the most part >plays Lizardmen and Tau >about 5 years ago, she, me and three others were involved in a game of rogue-trader, where after it a friend said she was really into me >a few weeks later, I work up courage to ask her out >we go on a date, have a good time, generally get along well. Didn't even feel weird >me on the other hand, being a scared retard or something, breaks it off with her, and over the phone. on Valentines day. >a few months go by, and we slowly start to re-integrate as friends, which we are still
It's weird, in so many ways. I like her more as a friend than in any sort of romantic way, and yet I do want her in a lesser way too. It's hard to explain, really. But mostly, I think its that bullshit that I was taught by my sister >if you don't feel amazing when near them all the time, you're not in love at all
>>44769467 I'm sorry, but the situation you're describing isn't anywhere near celibacy. I have the utmost respect for monks, ascetics and other people who've chosen to distance themselves from sex for ethical or philosophical reasons.
What you're describing isn't anything like that. According to what you yourself have written, you WANT sex very, very much (in fact, you've gone to the ridiculous extent of comparing it to FOOD, and implying that society is killing you by denying you free samples of it), you're just failing miserably to get any and are trying to tell yourself it's because everyone else is mean.
>>44764031 >>44764070 This is true for men as well one of my boyfriends left me over the fact that I made him breakfast in bed. His words were literally "If I wanted to date a woman I would date a woman."
It is ingrained very deeply how a man should act even in nontraditional relationships. This presents a problem as there is no option to take. Society only cares about what you look like. Looks start the relationship, personality continues it. When a man looks completely like a man he is expected to act completely like a man. When the disconnect happens and the man acts like a woman it makes everyone uncomfortable even if they are more open and receptive.
>>44769509 This has nothing to do with the way I see you personally. If you run around acting like someone owes you sex just because you want it bad enough then you're acting like an asshole. We're beyond the point of debating a subjective issue here, Honestly I'd be stoked if you were fabricating all of this, but in the event that you;re not you need to know that you need to make a few changes before things will get better.
>>44769533 >I'm sorry, but the situation you're describing isn't anywhere near celibacy
> people who are involuntarily celibate >who are involuntarily celibate > are involuntarily celibate >involuntarily celibate >involuntarily
Did you not actually read the post? >and implying that society is killing you by denying you free samples of it Reread my argument. I never stated sex should be free. I am saying that you are being actively denied food ( sex ), even if you are willing to pay for it. >you're just failing miserably to get any and are trying to tell yourself it's because everyone else is mean. You're still doing it, do normalfags even think?
And before you start posting about how I made a post shitting on women, and that is evidence of me being bad >>44768955 was my first post in the thread >>44769565 > If you run around acting like someone owes you sex just because you want it bad enough Fuck, do normalfags inherently have terrible reading comprehension. Again, no where did I state people owe each other sex or anyone is entitled to sex or even free sex. I'm literally saying that if you were actively denied all (legal) avenues of sex you would be pretty upset. >>44769567 There we go again, haven't actually said anything bad. I guess in the normalfag mind whenever two people disagree on a subject at least one of them must be an objectively terrible human being.
>>44739944 >gf buys me board games regularly on birthday/anniversary >eagerly comes to our DnD sessions and even though she is still too shy to roleplay she is always listening closely to the story unfolding >asked me recently to teach her how to DM
>>44769637 >Which has been used on this website for several years. Yes. Most often to refer to people who don't play tabletop games. It has no relevance to this discussion and largely serves as a buzzword to apply to people who disagree with you, which in turn makes you look like a twat.
>>44769608 I actually completely agree with, but the difference is that I've had sex, and let me tell you how I accomplished that without hiring a prostitute. I used to be the same exact way as you, so listen to my advice.
You have to understand that you are OVERESTIMATING women. You are treating them like they are exactly like men and are on the same mental level. Once I started being appropriately dismissive and treating them like the children they are instead of like equals. Once I started being a total ass to them is when I started getting laid regularly.
Don't treat women like you treat men because they clearly hate it. They will say otherwise, but their actions show the truth.
>>44769706 I personally don't care about sex that much either. I just don't like how everyone implies that people who are unable to have sex and are upset about their inability to do so have something wrong with them or an inability to have sex makes a person bad or morally wrong somehow. It's not about sex, it's about people ( normalfags) shitting on people who already have it rough and making it out to always 100% of the time be their own fault. Like rich people telling poors to just stop being poor and if they can't it's because the poor person is dumb and lazy and no other possibility exists.
>>44769608 >There we go again, haven't actually said anything bad. If you honestly cannot see how it's bad that you've just said society is killing you by "killing your genes" because it doesn't oblige people to have sex with you, than you are truly beyond help. I'm sorry. I've tried my best.
>>44769732 I get that, but it's completely natural to want a relationship with another person and I'm giving you my own experience with that situation to help you out.
Complaining about normalfags being dumb normalfags with absolutely no empathy is just pissing into the wind. It won't get you anywhere. Focus on yourself and ignore them. There's no point bothering with them because they've bought into the agenda force fed to them since they were kids. It's ingrained.
>>44769608 You legitimately compared sex to food and if you're actually this pissed off and don't think it's your fault that things are the way they are then I'm inclined to think trhat comes with an unwarranted sense of entitlement, stop being a child.
>>44769732 >people who are unable to have sex and are upset about their inability to do so have something wrong with them But it's pretty true. Being a bitter faggot posing as a nice guy won't get you laid. It will merely make you even more bitter.
>>44769780 >You legitimately compared sex to food The human species ceases to exist without either. Seems to be an apt comparison. But because you as an individual don't need sex to continue to exist, you think it isn't important with is egotistical as fuck. >>44769788 >But it's pretty true
>>44769732 But you ARE lazy. It's already been pointed out to you plenty of times that there is no mystical force preventing you from having sex. There is nothing, absolutely nothing stopping you asides the fact that it would require more effort to get off your ass and start working on making yourself a more attractive/sociable person than it is to complain about women having impossible standards. Or hell, don't put in what most people consider the bare minimum required to be a decent human being. Pay a prostitute. All you need to have for that is a job.
You do have a job, don't you?
I'm sorry if it sounds like I'm bullying you. I'm not into gloating in front of the weak, but that's when the weak at least know where they're standing. It's not bad that some people need to go on welfare for the time it takes them to find a job, so long as they really use that time to find a job. Leave their house early each morning, look for the jobs the whole day, put real effort into it, get interviews, get the right skills, talk to people, even look them up on the internet.
People who take their welfare than go back home to buy videogames with it and complain on the internet that they'd like to have even more free money are a burden on society.
And on the off chance you're going to pull the mental illness card and tell me it's literally impossible for you to not be an asshole or to put effort into something because you're autistic, or depressed, or have OCD: fuck you. I've met plenty of people with those conditions and worse, who've started off worse places than you (you know how I know that? Because evidently, you have internet access, which means you're not homeless or at least have a cellphone. That's more than many of them had) and worked their asses off to change and get better. If you really have such a problem, and it's so bad that you simply cannot do anything about it, at least don't try to drag down the rest of society by complaining about it's their fault.
>>44769801 You are not the fucking human species, shitlord. You are you. An individual. Possibly an evolutionary dead end, but in any case an individual. The HUMAN RACE would cease to exist without sex, but the human race, as an entity, doesn't have a problem with it either.
You, on the other hand, as a fucked up individual, would not die simply because you can't get sex. You will die because you can't have food.
I know that you know all this very well and are just pretending to be stupid for the sake of this argument, because if you were stupid enough not to you wouldn't be reading and writing, but take my word for it: it's not getting you anywhere.
>>44769801 Dude, 60% of the men who have ever lived died without having sex. It's not like it's a odd thing not having sex despite what modern mentally ill faggots will tell you. It doesn't matter if you spread your genes or whatnot. There's plenty of escapism and hobbies to lose yourself in, and sex isn't a requirement of it. It's actually not your fault that women haven't had sex with you, women in general haven't had sex with 60% of the men who ever existed, it's just nature. Women will always, always go solely for the top 20% of men and sometimes settle for the next 20% after they lose their value after years of fucking. Fuck life and focus on ideals. Like cute anime girls.
>>44769732 It may or may not be your fault that nobody wants to have sex with you. It isn't your fault that being lonely makes you sad. It is your fault that you've chosen to obsess over it to this degree instead of temporarily accepting it and doing something which brings you joy instead of misery.
>>44769801 Seeing as how neither you or myself will have any grand impact on whether or not the human race will continue to survive, your comparison in todays society is nothing short of absurdity, I get that you're pissed off and I'm not saying you can't feel that way, but the way you choose to respond to your adversity is wrong, when you're in a bad situation and you actively choose to do nothing while blaming everyone else for it, you've moved past the point of empathy and straight into cunt town.
>>44769944 >>44769947 I'm blaming Katawa Shoujo for the twinge of disappointment I felt when the cute deaf girl I met once had curly brown hair, not short blue. No glasses, either.
On the other hand she was a lot less bitchy, too. Maaaaybe would've tried hitting on her, but she was with her boyfriend at the moment so fat chance of that. I did screw a girl who was legally blind, though. Real gorgeous, but too Russian for my taste. You don't know what it's like until you've tried going steady with a Russian. Blind or not, there is no excuse.
Heres the reality. Women and men are both human beings, and you have to treat them as such. Theyre not fucking vending machines where you put in a coin and get out what you want. You don't earn anything by doing anything for another human being.
If you wouldn't have sex with you, then the chances are someone else won't either.
>>44769944 >>44769947 I think I'm missing the reference. She was/is cute though; solid 8/10 on the kawaii-o-meter >>44769964 I actively pushed against both of them, ending up being whittled back to Quebec (only Quebec) and Australia. They focused so much on trying to take Quebec I steamed my way across asia. By that point though it became an obsession to her. 1 guy on Quebec and 15 reinforcements couldn't take him. >>44769950 Hmmmmm maybe. I wonder if "incorrect neurological response from playing" is a user fault though?
>>44769806 Entirely different anon here, I'm trying to fix my luck with the ladies for a year even though I am literally autistic. I'm incredibly curious what these less fortunate people did to get better at it. Could you please tell me?
>>44769732 I understand that sexuality looks like a capitalism of fun. The rich get richer and the poor get poorer. But most of the time, it is their own fault. Though sometimes it's because they didn't know any better, mother nature wasn't fair with them or their upbringing was absolutely awful.
I don't know about your situation, anon. I don't know you. Why would I even bother to help? I guess that even though I should be devoid of social norms and lack empathy I still empathize with you.
Here: http://www.nicknotas.com/dating-101/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n8s_jkFi2Uk and read that book: No More Mr. Niceguy And Models by Mark Manson, too. It's not science, but it makes more sense than pseudoscience anyway. And it's fun to look for clothing after reading the Kinowear Bible. All these things helped me step out of the self-sabotaging bitterness. I stopped complaining and defending my complaints so I could still complain... Yes, complaining doesn't do shit.
>>44770117 >best board This board hasn't even been passable for at least 6 years now. This board has so many generals that it's just a tabletop version of /vg/. I can't even say that actually. It's a quest version of /vg/
>>44770137 Specifically referring to autists here, from what I've seen and from what I've talked to them the key seems to be to (perhaps paradoxically) try and view human interaction as a bit of a mechanical process, just an extremely complex one. You do some things, and other things happen. This is a lot like the "Vending Machine" fallacy, except that it acknowledges that the things you need to do are variable, based on the circumstances, and more complicated than "buy her gifts, receive sex in return".
In some situations, people expect you to smile. In others, they expect you to laugh. Sometimes, it's proper to (humorously) make a snide comment at someone. Other times the same comment may come off as insulting.
Even if they don't make sense to you, learn and analyze these circumstances. Understand the social and facial cues leading to each reaction and learn to quickly choose and apply said reaction.
In terms of "getting your life on track": use "autism" to your advantage. Be orderly and methodical about it (though trying not to become too rigid). There are no magical answers but there are some things which are definitely positive and going about them can be a start. Make a list of the things you think you need to do, preferably by day, and make sure you at least try to do them. Havefriends or family members help you if you're having trouble decide.
Need to get fit? Make sure that you visit the gym for 2 hours each time, 3 times a week. Make a list of the exercises you'll do each time, and stick to it. List the things you should and shouldn't eat, and adjust your diet accordingly.
You think you need to be clean? Make sure to shower twice a day, soap and shampoo as needed (ask someone how often you need to, or you'll end up damaging your skin/hair). Brush your teeth 3 times a day. Shave and use cologne.
I won't say it's simply, but it isn't rocket science either. And people with autism are sometimes the most equipped for dealing with complex mechanisms.
>>44770263 >Even if they don't make sense to you, learn and analyze these circumstances. Understand the social and facial cues leading to each reaction and learn to quickly choose and apply said reaction. As a fellow aspie, this is the best solution. The key to understand how to interact with other people is to realize that you don't really need to feel or think things, you just need to look the part. In all odds, they aren't really amused every single time they laugh. Laughing is just something that happens under certain social situations. Learn to detect those situations, and laugh when they happen. Try thinking about it as a game. In a game, you block when an enemy attacks, and you dodge when they charge, and you attack them back when they're vulnerable. How do you know when those happen? They telegraph it. Now, real people don't glow red before they intend to laugh, but they still telegraph their intentions. Imagine, in your mind, that if they telegraph the attack "laugh", you need to quickly recall the correct reaction and use it. You lose social health otherwise.
>>44770263 >try and view human interaction as a bit of a mechanical process, just an extremely complex one It pretty much is. It's just so complicated and has so many variables that it's downright impossible to quantify it.
>>44770263 Another piece of advice: don't be afraid to change your routine. I know that's an awful thing to say to some people with autism, and it might not seem fair, but this is just something that's expected from you and so long as you do it slowly and deliberately, and with the support of your friends and family, it would be quite so bad. Actually, that by itself is a very good advice.
Ask for help. Constantly. You'd be stunned by how sympathetic people would be towards you. The important think is to make sure they understand that you're really aiming to change yourself for the better. You're not asking for them to "do things for you" or anything, you're honestly improving. Most people aren't actually looking to make fun of the disadvantaged. In all odds, if you walked up to a female classmate and, nicely, while obeying the social norms in such a situation (don't get too close, don't stare, be polite, etc.) say "I'm not sure what I should wear to look more attractive. What would you suggest?", she'll respond a lot better than if you just stuck to the same shirts you've been wearing since middle school just because these are the shirts you like. Maybe she'll help you, maybe not, but you'll definitely come off as deserving that help. And if she doesn't, and that's how it looks, somebody else just might.
Accept that you need that help. You're not being "talked down to" or pitied. This is what YOU want.
>>44770388 I love having a smooth chin. I love the smell of shaving foam, and I love the feeling of the razor. I used to shave every single day. But then, I noticed that everyone around me had stubble. Where I live, this is simply how it's fashionable for boys to look.
So, as uncomfortable as it made me, I made an experiment. I stopped shaving for several days. It was itchy and hot and I missed the smell of shaving foam in the morning but after a while, people started approaching me and complimenting me. They said how much nicer I looked. They told me I should keep it like that. They even gave me advice on how to keep my stubble trimmed. I told them I prefer to be without, but I did it in a friendly, joking-sounding fashion. I didn't whine.
And they understood. They said "Well, you should consider keeping it even so, because it looks much better."
>>44770388 >if you walked up to a female classmate and, nicely, while obeying the social norms in such a situation (don't get too close, don't stare, be polite, etc.) say Honestly one of the best advice out there would be "talk to girls without thinking about shagging them". Learn to chit chat. Get gossip. Laugh sometimes. Make snappy answers when you can think about one. Don't be too nice. Some people say it's hard to be friend with girls and it's true, but being somewhat close to some helps a lot, both for your own perception of females, and for their perception of yourself.
Also they can invite you to parties, hook you up with their shy bookworms friends and all that 100% normie shit.
I generally hang out with normies - attractive, healthy people with good jobs and in long term relationships (some of them are even married and have babies and shit), who quite enjoy things like Catan or Munchkin. My other half and I started playing X-wing recently and went along to the FLGS on a beginners day. Out of the four regulars there playing it there were three neckbeards (or at least dubious examples of facial hair), two ponytails, one fedora, and at least one case of poor personal hygiene.
This advice ain't aimed at any of you autists in particular, but since this's just turned into /tg/s dating advice and motivational speaking thread I might as well say: LOWER YOUR STANDARDS.
Yes, I know that you're going to say that you shouldn't degrade yourself for anyone, and that it's an act of submission and only cucked beta cucks (or are likely Jewish feminists) will dare ask for less than the very best, but the thing to understand is that there is a range of possibilities between your "angelic goddess-like waifu who's perfect for you in every way and is everything you've ever dreamed of" and "retarded slob of a bimbo crackwhore with the face of Lizzie Velásquez".
Everyone wants a perfect companion. That applies to men and women equally, and it applies to all of them. The reason some people do have girlfriends and boyfriends is that they realize that "perfection" doesn't exist.
Are you perfect? No? Do you have flaws? Would your perfect significant other accept you for your flaws?
Than why shouldn't you except them for theirs? It's literally a logical paradox, by way of Cantian universal application. Everyone cannot be perfect if perfection includes an acceptance of flaws, because they wouldn't accept flaws from someone who's perfect. Unless you consider yourself so uplifted from the rest of humanity that you're somehow exempt from doing what you expect others to (which is not a cool attitude), you're gonna need to deal with it.
Now, this applies a bit to the more socially disadvantaged folks here because at this point in their lives their romantic ideals tend to be dominated by fantasies.
>Also they can invite you to parties, hook you up with their shy bookworms friends and all that 100% normie shit.
Odds are, for example, that when you read that sentence you imagined a cutsey anime girl with glasses and a bashful smile, and of course she had big tits, perfect skin and a squeaky little girl voice.
If you actually go to that party expecting to meet that woman, and refuse to end up with anyone else, you will never find a woman. She might exist somewhere, but then she might also not, and would you really like to bet your entire romantic future on it?
It's perfectly fine to have some standards. Everyone does - they're called Turn Ons and Turn Offs, or Preferences. You may decide that you want your mate to share your hobbies, and that's perfectly understandable. You'll know where to look for them (places where people go who share your hobbies, or internet forums, or you put up your hobbies as a term on an online dating service). You don't have to date someone for the sake of dating anyone at all.
However, you'll have to accept the fact that this girl who shares your hobbies may not be perfectly beautiful. She may have bad skin. She may be fat. She may smell weird, or have some hobby that annoys you.
Don't dismiss her immediately because she isn't your fantasy. Rather, think about it logically, weighing the benefits: do you want a girlfriend who shares your hobbies badly enough that you'll accept her even if she's fat? How important is thinness to you? How important are your hobbies?
It's a cold equation, but it's important that you at least try and make it. And don't think for a moment you're the only one who does: "normies" do the exact same thing (except in their case, maybe "shares your hobbies" is replaced with "has the right hair color", or "likes the same music.")
>>44770673 >>44770726 As a final sidenote from someone who's been there: I know there's a great deal of temptation to target the "shy bookworm", because you seem to have so much in common and she'll definitely share your hobbies and all that, but from experience: romance between two passive parties will stagnate. If you don't trust yourself to take the lead, go for a woman whom you know would because otherwise it'll die. Also, too many common interests and views aren't entirely healthy. Imagine dating one of your gaming buddies (imagine they had tits and all).
Have you ever had a fight over some geeky nuance that almost ended up descending into punches? Consider that if your girlfriend is as passionate about your shared hobby, this might happen. Except you wouldn't throw punches, you'll just break up over something really fucking retarded like which class is more optimal or which anime character should like which. (which is to say, don't fall into the trap of trying to avoid conflict by agreeing with everything she says. Not because people don't like being agreed with, but because they don't like it when people aren't being honest with them - and unless your ideal girlfriend is also autistic, she will likely notice after some point. It's okay for you to have your own opinions, and all.).
>>44770513 It might surprise you, but many chicks actually dig a bumbling spaghetti man. Romantic comedies and all made them view those as charming. If you're good looking (and this is the tricky part), you may get a fair bit of mileage out of playing the shy, insecure doormat while some wannabe party-girl takes you around dancing (make sure to fumble and ask her to teach you how to) and drinking (make sure to order the wrong things, so she can laugh at your naivete and order something manlier for you).
I've been doing it for years. I was actually worried after I lost my virginity that I might be unable to use that method anymore, but I just lie about it. Girls love it.
A warning, though: this method cannot hold up a long term relationship. It's good for a date or two, maybe a fuck, but if you're nothing but pathetic the girl WILL lose interest after a while. That's when you move to the next one.
Also, this cannot be stressed out far enough: you need to be actually attractive. The charmingly insecure hunk is every bit an archetype chicks have been taught to like as the shy bookworm with the big tits is to guys. They expect to get the whole Hollywood deal out of it. If you happen to be fat, hairy, smelly and flabby, no amount of spaghettiying will make you look good. If you've lucked on being tall, blonde, and clear skinned, any faux pas you make will be in your favor.
>>44770797 >Unless your ideal girlfriend is also autistic, she will likely notice after some point.
You know jack shit about autism, anon. We don't notice. We just don't. Even after reading books and blogs about bodylanguage I learned a lot, but I still didn't notice it when two women were obviously interested in me. One even said flat out: "I like you" while sitting next to me. It seems that she was constantly trying to make a move on me by doing palm reading and asking what I like in girls.
Now imagine two of those people. Christ on a bike what a disaster. It might happen, but only if one actually takes the friggin' initiative to talk and state his business and intents clearly.
And parties are torture to some autistic people as they are sensitive to ALL senses. But you can take a 15 minute break from those. (Thank god)
>>44770673 >men told to lower their standards continiously >women expect an attractive, ripped man with a high paying job, ample free time and an incredibly colorful social life as a bare minimum >get told "yo go girl, don't settle for anyone!"
>>44770896 That's what the word "unless" if for. It means that a girlfriend who ISN'T autistic will notice. The implication being that an autistic one won't. Read people's words carefully rather than hurrying to get offended.
>>44770896 >Now imagine two of those people. Christ on a bike what a disaster. It might happen, but only if one actually takes the friggin' initiative to talk and state his business and intents clearly. If a friend tells you "GOD DAMMIT MIKE THAT CHICK IS TOTALLY INTO YOU JUST MAKE A MOVE YOU RETARD" that's a good clue about what you have to do.
And if Josh lied to you, maybe she'll say yes anyway.
>>44766506 >I was very clear I already was ain a relationship so i didn't really figure that bit out. That's why you were attractive. When you're in a relationship, you're getting validated, and validation breeds confidence, and confidence is attractive.
>>44770906 Where the hell have you gotten that statistic from? I'm sure there are plenty of girls their with unrealistically high standards just the same, but just the same, they won't be getting any. Maybe they'll blame society, maybe they won't. Does it matter to you? The ones on both side who'll end up getting any are the ones who know to be realistic. True, girls have an easier time about it since it takes less effort for a girl to attract a "more attractive" guy than the other way around, but that's just life. Take comfort in the fact you still have an infinitely higher chance to make it as president, can piss wherever you want, and never have to deal with a period.
>>44770906 >women expect an attractive, ripped man with a high paying job, ample free time and an incredibly colorful social life as a bare minimum >get told "yo go girl, don't settle for anyone!" And whine on tumblr they don't get any.
Just like you, but they have their own tumblr and arent anons.
>>44770978 I have a girl like that in my friend circle, a pretty smart girl at that (PhD) with ridiculously high standards that whines all the time she can't find a boyfriend. Sure she has sex with one-night stands, but she's constantly sad.
>>44770263 >This is a lot like the "Vending Machine" fallacy, except that it acknowledges that the things you need to do are variable, based on the circumstances, and more complicated than "buy her gifts, receive sex in return" I'd say it's more like a Slot Machine. You put in your "quarter" - your effort, your time, your resources - basically anything you can't get back at the end of the day. Then you pull the lever. Sometimes, if you're lucky, you win a little, and have a nice fling. Sometimes, if you're really lucky, you win a lot, and have a long relationship. And sometimes, if you're super duper lucky, you hit jackpot, and you're happily married for 50 years and die in your sleep. But most times? You lose the quarter, better luck next time. And that's really discouraging for a lot of men, because there's only so many quarters and what if they're just wasting their time?
>>44770978 >>44770980 If their standards are as unrealistic as the average weaboo sperglord's (say, for an equivalent, they're actually expecting to date the dude from 50 Shades of Gray) than either they won't get any or they will but it'll end after a week and then they'll bitch about it on the internet (which, by the way, logically means that in the end they DID lower their standards, even if they're uncomfortable about admitting to it). So yeah, they get to have a whole act of sex over the male equivalent, which is just as unsatisfying and in the case of women probably painful, too. The thing is, they won't be getting a happy relationship out of it. Women have to settle for something manageable, too.
>>44771022 She still has sex, she can still easily get sex whenever she wants. You're not saying anything contradictory to what I said. She easily gets some.
>>44771010 There's plenty of attractive dudes that have fucked a pig or two while drunk. It is absolutely pathetically easy for a women to get laid no matter how ugly she is and whatever standards she holds are validated by society.
>>44771050 >or they will but it'll end after a week and then they'll bitch about it on the internet (which, by the way, logically means that in the end they DID lower their standards, even if they're uncomfortable about admitting to it) You have clearly never men women.
>>44771020 Don't be a jackass. I don't know where you live, but where I do, they're a dime a dozen. You just have to look for them instead of mentally filtering out everyone who doesn't act like a waifu (presumably ending up seeing ghost towns)
Actually, now that I think about it, how's that even possible? You guys whine all the time about how there aren't any more "good" submissive women to go around - if there aren't any women who aren't submissive, either, does that mean you've just never met a woman?
>>44771050 That's the thing, chads and fabios with have sex with who the fuck ever using things like Tinder because they just want a quick lay. The girl's looks don't matter too much if you just want to get off. This builds up girl's expectations because chad keeps using them as one night stands off tinder. But the thing is, chad doesn't date these girls. He dates the female equivalent of chads, he only has quickies with average girls. So now these averages girls have their standards completely skewed expecting a chad to start a relationship with them.
>>44771099 If you think it's anywhere near comparable, you're insane. The average girl has the love life of a high level male playboy. It is insanely easy to get laid as a girl than it is to get laid as a man.
>>44771040 More like Blackjack. A slot machine is perfectly random. Much as some guys would like to believe that women are, too (because it makes their own failures with them hurt less, since they mean less about them), you know that this isn't the case. Think of it as a "smart algorithm", of the type dataheads make to comb the internet silos for cross-referencing material so they can predict market trends and such. It's not magic, it's just that there a million variables and you have to be attentive to all of them. That's why you get an algorithm (basically a primitive AI) to do it, rather than a human.
Fortunately for you, much as you may not believe, getting a girl to feel good is significantly less complex, mechanically, than combing the internet for cross-referencing material.
True, putting in the correct values may not produce the desired result every single time (a "wasted quarter"), but it can increase your chances, often significantly.
If you don't trust your social skills, you'd be surprised by how far you could go simply by performing the following, purely physical, mechanical actions:
1. Get fit. 2. Stay clean. 3. Dress nice. 4. Go out.
True, you wouldn't be raising your chances to 100%, or even to 90%, and the "random element" (which I'm assuming you include social skills in) would still play a big role, but you will be increasing your chances from 10% to 30%. That's a 300% increase that doesn't cost you all that much, except in effort.
>>44748128 My friend invited his current ERP partner to the Pathfinder game I'm starting up, which I was fine with because I have 0 expectations and tons of free time. Then her fiance. My brain had to do a little reboot because of how odd this is for me. There's no secret, he knows, he just doesn't mind. Things are going to get magical in whatever realm I'm making.
>>44771220 In my experience, cooking does it all the same.
There's a saying out here going "If you want to get a girlfriend, be handsome. If you aren't handsome, get rich. If you can't get rich, learn to cook."
I think someone mentioned it up in the thread but while cooking is seen as feminine, SERIOUS BUSINESS cooking is seen as manly. I'm not just talking barbecue here, I'm talking gourmet shit. There are some crazy beautiful, delicious desserts out there you can make in 15 minutes with a spoon and a carton of milk, and when you serve them out of your freezer for a date you'll look like fucking Gordon Ramsey.
>>44771264 True facts. Best part is, like with the 15 minutes thing, it doesn't matter if you can actually cook like a chef as long as you can cook things that look like a chef cooked them. If it looks challenging and tastes good, you're golden.
>>44771285 >somebody used a person as an example of extreme ugliness >let's go look up what she looks like You're a silly sausage, anon. You know that?
>>44771310 Eh, depends on what part of life. Men get fucked over in plenty of situations, but good luck being respected in a lot of fields of work as a woman. The grass is always greener on the other side.
>>44771414 What fields? In my engineering program, any girls in the field have the ground they walk on worshiped, and professors give them extra time compared to everyone else. People always say girls aren't respected in these fields but I never see it.
>>44771330 As much as people are whining in this thread about women getting sex easier than men, it is far easier for an unattractive man to become attractive than it is for an unattractive woman to become attractive.
For even fat guys, it usually amounts to 'buy some halfway decent clothes, get a haircut, neaten up your facial hair, bathe yourself every day.' Bam. Done. As long as you aren't outright obese, you'll look decent enough to get laid.
>>44771462 Ugly women still get laid frequently. Just look at all the fat black baby making machines in the ghettos, all those burn victims and girls with cerebral palsy still having boyfriends. I see it all the time. The only female virgin over 20 years old I've ever seen was a nun.
>>44771486 I see it constantly. The first thing we were told in the introductory course if how glad the people in the department were to see so many girls and how they take extra care not to discourage any women from the field. Half the speech on the first day of the introductory course was about female inclusion.
>>44771456 >and professors give them extra time compared to everyone else. What the fuck, how is that justifiable? That makes the whole degree worth less if it's held by a woman and justifies choosing to hire less qualified men over women!
>>44743309 Look really absorbed when playing one. When she asks why so muc concentration you can explain minor aspects of the game. Not strategy, or even /tg/, but I was once explaining the stamina system of Dark Souls to my gf when she asked why I didn't just block everything(I suck at rolling btw). She found it so cool and well developed that she started playing it herself.
>>44743640 Because if you're just going to have a doppelganger doing everything with you then you can just hire a hooker for sex and stay alone the rest of the time. What you want is someone open to trying stuff with you, not a female carbon copy of you.
>>44750050 >Go to an engineering college >Have an all engineer group >Game gets derailed by engineering debate about something that shows up in game It's probably the most fun I actually have in college, everything else just seems dull.
>>44770726 >You don't have to date someone for the sake of dating anyone at all. This is something no one else has touched upon yet, but it's a very crucial lesson. It's something I've seen other people learn the hard way, and it's something I've learned the hard way myself.
Dating someone just to date someone is sort of a twofold nightmare. On the one hand, dating someone just to date someone is something a desperate man would do so it's unlikely it'd happen at all because desperation is as unattractive as confidence is attractive. If it does happen, it's not something that's going to last very long unless she's desperate too, and i have no idea what would happen then. People think it'd be like Katawa Shoujo, but maybe it'd be more like Mirai Nikki - a sick codependency where they don't actually care about each other, they would've been with anyone who would have them. But I wouldn't know, it's not what I went through and it's not something I've seen so far.
But on the other hand you have what I went through: what if she really does like you? What if she's actually into you? I realized what I had done and figured that it wasn't fair or right for either of us. I decided to break it off clean with her right then, because while I still wasn't really into her romantically, that didn't mean I was okay with hurting her. Of course, this all came to a head later on when I actually realized she really was into me, when she saw how openly affectionate I was with a different girl and she got genuinely angry with me because I had never been quite like that with her. Imagine how bad that would have been for either of us if we had still been dating.
If and when you get with someone, it has to be because you're into them and they're into you. Anything else is desperation or pity.
>>44771666 >automatically assuming incest I always knew the devil was a liar, but I didn't think he was stupid
>>44764031 >I was under the impression that women loved a guy who could cook, and who kept himself and his space clean. They do, but only to an extent. There are exceptions to this rule, but those are the ones that were raised in a non-traditional role household where the mother cooks and cleans most often or have other ...odd situations. Keep in mind that this is 4chan and a decent amount of people are just trying to ruin your day/life.
>>44771170 >The last step While I'm not very socially awkward, I'm not a huge fan of that last part. There's practically no girls at my LGS, my friends aren't the type that go out to bars or whatnot, and almost all of what I love to do doesn't involve me going anywhere. Overall, it feels like I'm wasting the time i have to do what I love, to make an attempt at something that will odds are leave me disappointed mentally in the first place (can't deal with dumb broads) Odds are I'm just doing it (going out in general) wrong.
>>44751281 This. Come for the curves(plural mind you). Date for personality(not being an asshole in general). Marry when you both compromised enough of yourselves to each other without hating it. Real love is built mostly by non-asshole people that started a casual relationship based on basic desires , and proceeded to share enough moments to make differences in preferences seem irrelevant. The "love at first sight" shit is as fictional as "you were involved in an accident and your body was remade with metal". It's feasible, but don't depend on it.
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