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>Character caught breaking the law >"I roll to seduce

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>Character caught breaking the law
>"I roll to seduce the town guard"

How can we fix this?
>>
>>44667621
Fix it by not sucking as a GM.
>>
>>44667621
-40 situational modifier due to him being on duty and the character being a criminal.
Another question, while we're at it?
>>
>>44667621
>How can we fix this?
By making most town guards place law over pussy.
>>
Make the guard gay
>>
>>44667673
It's funny because with appropriate bonus stacking, PC above level 5 can just take 10 and still succeed.
>>
>>44667621
The guard doesn't swing that way. In fact, by strange coincidence, all the guards in the city are gay.
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>>44667621

God, women in the 60's were fucking gross-looking.
>>
>>44667696
>can just take 10
not while he's dragging your ass to prison
>>
>>44667696
He was obviously talking about Dark Heresy moron.
>>
>>44667621

Less roll and more rol.
I expect people to come back with covers.

I once got paid for exorcising a building after I was caught sneaking in.
>>
>>44667702
>God, women in the 60's were fucking gross-looking.
Are you fucking high?
>>
>>44667621
That's an entirely valid attempt if the law they were caught breaking isn't too serious. No different from women flirting to get out of a traffic ticket. It probably won't work, but as GM I wouldn't fault them for trying.
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>>44667774

Maybe I just don't like people who look on the inbred side of white.
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>>44667774
are you?
>>
>>44667794
That's not the 60's, that's Britain.
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>>44667700
good thing the PC was a male then.
>>
>>44667621
Roll to see if the guard will go for it.
>1-4: Guard is happily married, values his job, or otherwise will not take bribe/sexual favor.
>5-6: Guard may take bribe, but is unlikely to unless it is sufficiently large or PCs make exceptionally good argument. Steep penalty.
>7-8: Guard is either minorly corrupt, hurting for money, or is in a bad spot in their current relationship. Small penalty.
>9: Guard is exceptionally corrupt, in dire need of money, or just doesn't care about his job. Will absolutely accept bribes/sexual favors, no questions asked.
>10: Guard will take bribe/sexual favors, but arrest the PCs anyway.
>>
>>44667702
Ah yes. Human evolution and the female form has really progressed by leaps and bounds in the last 50 years.
>>
>>44668160

It certainly did wonders for men.

In less than a hundred years, the average height in developed countries has skyrocketed due to nutrition and healthcare.

So probably not genetic, as much as it is just nutrition.
>>
>>44667621
>How can we fix this?

Common sense? Just because you successfully 'seduce' a guard doesnt mean hes going to let you off the hook for breaking the law. And depending on the infraction, the guard(s) might be so amped up that 'rolling to seduce' isnt even an option.

In fact, Id say rolling to seduce is a somewhat rare situation. Thats just not how it works. Hot chicks might get out of a traffic ticket from time to time, but no matter how good looking or charming you are, 99.9% of police officers are going to make the arrest/issue the citation.
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>>44667829
>that's Britain.

Stockholm, Sweden.
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>>44668219
Or, you know, fashion.
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>>44667829
What? Have people conflated (innacurate; Burgers especially seem to not know what inbreeding is) stereotypes about the monarchy with the country they happen to reside in?
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>>44667621
It was never a problem to begin with. I don't see how it could be.
>>
How often do people try to seduce this guard ?

The more often someone attempts it, the harder it is for any attempt to succeed. A flashing of the tit isn't going to help much if the guard expects another perp to go all the way to sex later that night.

Or if the guards can get away with raping prisoners in the cells.

How many guards are present ?
If there are multiple guards present, seduction gets harder as there is a greater risk of the guard superiors finding out and punishing the guard for leniency. Seducing them all is difficult as they aren't likely to want to share a sexual partner.
>>
>>44667621
The guard is either so happily married or so terrified of his/her wife/husband's reaction that they wouldn't even dream of cheating. The best way to do it is to have their spouse be built like a brick shit house because of their job. Nothing puts a damper on an attempt to seduce like having a butcher named Olga/Olaf go from bringing their lovely other a bit of lunch as a surprise to trying to lop the head off of some harlot PC with a meat cleaver. Alternatively just make the guard ugly as sin.
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>>44667621
The problem isn't with seduction/diplomacy/intimidation rolls themselves, the problem is that a lot of GMs are retards and don't provide an appropriate scope of success.

In most situations a success or even a major succes shouldn't mean that you're suddenly mind controling the guards or whatever, it should mean that you manage to convince them to listen to your side of the story before they beat you up and throw you in jail.

If you're caught red-handed jumping around in the puddles made out of the king's blood, a perfect roll doesn't mean that the guards give you a handjob and make you the new king, success means that they might hesitate for an extra second which gives you half a chance to bolt before they shove halberds up your ass.

Also, bonus to rolls for role-playing is absolute cancer. You ROLL FIRST, then you role-play the result of your attempt, you don't role-play first and then roll, that just creates retarded situations where someone makes the most amazing speech and then whiffs for no reason, and encourages fuckery in character creation. Acting out the result AFTER you roll lets you show the other players what it looks like when your characters succeeds and what it looks like when it fails, is it pure skill, dumb luck, overthinking it, trying to hard?
>>
You faggots are stupid as shit.

If someone is of low enough level, they will not be able to seduce an entire group of guards.

If someone is of high enough level, more than just a few guards will be sent after their arse if they run amok breaking the law.

Plus, >>44668433 is completely right.
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>>44667621
Fuck them in the ass then throw them in jail with Jamal for more assfuck.
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>>44667694
>I step in and seduce the guard instead. Do I roll or is this an assist action?
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>>44667702
You fucking drainage slurry, that is a 7/10 atleast
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>>44667621
The guard presses additional charges for attempted bribery.
>>
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>>44668605
Better add attempted murder to the list too then.
>>
All warriors are eunuchs.

Fierce soldiers with high voices.
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>>44668567

White women are gross, though.

And her body is shit.
>>
All the guards are eunuchs.

Even the female guards
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OP, try to not be shit at being a GM.

Trying to seduce a married town guard on duty as he is apprehending a criminal is easily a -60, and that's only if you even allow the player to roll.

If there is no chance for success, or if there is no chance of failure, you're not supposed to roll.

Stop being retarded, learn to use difficulty modifiers, and don't be a twat.
>>
>>44667621
It doesn't need fixing. Trying to seduce a guard when he's part of an entire squad of men is a really bad idea, psychologically speaking.
>>
>"Sure thing" the trio of guards say.
>in a shaded alley, quickies ensue.
>their carnal urges sated, the guards knock you over the head with a halberd butt and drag you away to jail.
>no one cares about what happened to a criminal, or what what did to attempt escaping their fate

Honestly, what did you expect?
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>>44668880
Not a rape-scenario you shitlord.
>>
>>44668231

This, unless it's literally the most minor of things the guard's still going to sentence her to 20 years in to isocubes. He might just mutter in dismay 'always the cute ones.' or something while he takes her in anyways.
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>>44668955
>Not a rape-scenario you shitlord.
>On 4chan.

...Okay.
>>
>>44667621
If they've already caught you it's way too late for seduction. They've already got power over you, you don't want to be giving them ideas.

Seduction works better as a distraction before a crime or before they realise you've committed a crime.
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>>44668955
Not a rape when the PC willingly seduces guards and the guards "let" her.

It's fraud. Except that being a law-breaker removes someone from the in-group of the law-abiding, and the law does not apply to outgroup members (aka "outlaws") so that it's literally impossible to defraud them no matter how much deceit occurs.

Criminals have only themselves to blame for enabling a corrupt society. If PCs refrained from seducing guards, perhaps by choosing to become lords and hiring their own guards instead of becoming law-breakers, then higher-trust norms would be practical and they could be ingroup members.
>>
>>44667696
Fuck you, Todd, diplomancing isn't fun to play with.
If you want that shit, we can play Exalted.
>>
>>44667621
By not reposting the front page of Reddit.
>>
>>44669059
The law generally doesn't work like that.
Breaking a law =/= law no longer applies.

Also, outlawry was a punishment in of itself for major crimes, a town guard can't sentence them to that the moment they're apprehended.
>>
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Rolled 12 (1d20)

>>44667621
>"I roll to seduce the town guard"
>>
>>44669059
>>44669050
I really don't want to say: "I was just pretending to be retarded", but...
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>>44667621
Town guards are golems, gay or not fucking dumb.
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>>44669132
The legal system generally doesn't.

Human instinct almost invariably does.
>>
>>44667621
The town guard immediately calls for backup - the special anti-bard squad of eunuch monks.
>>
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>>44667621
Why shouldn't it work?
>>
>>44667621
Why does the townguard give a shit?
He's paid to stand at the gates, confiscate shit from visitors, sleep on duty and stab invaders.
>>
>>44667621

He's a cop. He can have it from you whenever he wants, for free. Just like the rest of the whores.

Not even trolling, that's how it works IRL.
>>
>>44669246
Not everybody is as easy to get blowjobs from as you, anon.
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>>44667621
Eunuchs
>>
>>44667621
Seduce =/= mind control
Town guard =/= all the town guards
What is ridiculously high difficulty level that is mandated by the situation?

101 reasons how to resolve this.
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>>44667621
"Wow, I like you.. I'll make sure you get the BIG cell, and nobody will even spit in your food!"
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>>44667621
-5 modifier due to circumstances. If character skill isn't 15+, it's pretty unlikely it would work.
>>
>>44667621
>criminals caught breaking the law
>"i kill them because i'm an adventurer, then loot their corpses."

How can we fix this?
>>
>>44667621
They are all eunuchs/chem geld
>>
>>44669845
Stop playing with pondscum who never read a book and got all their fantasy from vidya.
>>
>>44668759
That's YOUR opinion.
Keep it to yourself, nobody wants to hear your selfloathing just because you are not nearly as attractive to the opposite sex as she is.
>>
calculate in factors such as guardsmen give a shit, parties motivation, guards motivation, political movement, threat and present danger.
>>
>>44670593
Samefag.
>>
Make the guards Unsullied, and not show Unsullied, but book zero sexual interest true fully trained Unsullied.
>>
>>44667621
I don't see what the problem is. Unless the PC uses this tactic all the time, or the crime is something serious like murder, why not just give them a chance to succeed?
>>
>>44667621
>"Your character rolls on the ground. They fail to seduce the guard, obviously."
>>
>>44668772
>My god, no one here has testicles!
>You're in the female baths, retard.
>>
Ok I actually have a story about this where my player got pretty mad.

>players enter into a town centered around a university
>because of the college magic is cheap around here, you can buy stuff like cantrip items at reduced prices, the economy is bustling
>the guards are always in armor, always between 8-10 feet tall
>tell them they occasionally see the giant guys walking around almost mechanically
>players assume (because they can see eyes through the helm slits) that it's some kind of battle suit thing
>don't correct them because what they are isn't common knowledge
>one of my players ends up killing a guy at a bar, the barman calls the guards
>the players are brought in
>one tries to reason with the guards, then pleas, then seduce
>nothing works
>eventually tries to cast charm person
>tell them it doesn't work
>gets pissed about my "fiat prison arc"

If you couldn't guess, they were flesh golems stuffed into armor. The university hides this fact, and the fact they teach a fuck ton of necromancy to certain "gifted" students. One of the rights of initiation is a compulsion effect to not reveal secrets, and grave robbing for components for your flesh golem.
>>
>>44669147
can't be sure these days, there's been an u[surge in sjw/tumblrfags as of late.
>>
"The guard is a professional."
>>
>>44672255
>grave robbing
>not actually just having people deliver their bodies to the university so that they can be 'respectfully cremated'
>not growing more flesh for the flesh golems in GIANT TUUUUBES
>Not having an entire quest about the monsters having woken up and broken out of the tubes
>>
>>44672255
The only problem I would have with this is that I don't think you can hide it. At some point someone will notice that he doesn't know any guard personally, as well as any of his peers.

Or did I get this wrong and those flesh golems have a normal ordinary life outside of being guards and being a flesh golem?

Aside from that, your players were a bit stupid. But I can understand if they can't break this habit.
>>
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>>44667866
>>
>>44667621
Guards are constructs that were made specifically to adhere to and uphold laws. Sort of like dealing with one of those pre-recorded robots used for phone helplines, but with the physical form necessary to apprehend criminals.

There are ways around this, of course, but usually not until later in game.
>>
>>44672362
The grave robbing is an initiation thing. They don't actually need it to keep production going, it's to prove one's worth.

>>44672412
>At some point someone will notice that he doesn't know any guard personally, as well as any of his peers.
There are normal guards, but they are employees of the university. Basically the folks who coordinate the golems. They help hide the secret.

>Or did I get this wrong and those flesh golems have a normal ordinary life outside of being guards and being a flesh golem?
They're stored on university grounds when not in use.
>>
>>44667621

Minor victimless crimes with only one guard present? I'd let the PC have a go at it.

But with a major crime and multiple guards, the DC will be so high the PC won't be able to pass it.
>>
>>44668433
Nah man, you roleplay first then make the roll. The roll determines the reaction which the NPC has to your words - what might be moving to one person is monotonous to another, or might have been exactly the wrong thing to say to that specific person - but the player should roleplay the dialogue as they want to do it before making their roll; it better preserves player agency to allow them to roleplay before dice hit the table.

As for the "fuckery in character creation", do you mean people not taking social skills and then roleplaying the character as though they had them? Do you not have faith in your players roleplaying appropriately for the skills they've put on their sheet?
>>
>>44672736
heh, officially sanctioned grave robbing tests. The gravediggers and mourners are all university examiners.
>>
>>44668433
>>44672910

Are you fuckers really still having this argument?
>>
Castrate all new recruits upon joining the guard. That'd work, right?
>>
>>44668433
>Also, bonus to rolls for role-playing is absolute cancer. You ROLL FIRST, then you role-play the result of your attempt, you don't role-play first and then roll, that just creates retarded situations where someone makes the most amazing speech and then whiffs for no reason,

The roll-first method is a valid one, but it's not the only one. Hurf-durfing about cancer and claiming your way is the One True Path is just infantile. Get over yourself. Your opinions are not facts.

The case for the other side is this: the DM needs to know what angle the player character is taking so that the DM can set the DC appropriately. Otherwise what you have is essentially Diplomancy (rolling against an entirely arbitrary DC as if it were a pseudo-spell) followed by some explanatory RP.

You're wrong about situations where an amazing speech whiffs for no reason. In cases like these the DM can just set such a low DC that it's an auto-pass.

If you're going to bring up a situation where the *player* makes an amazing rhetorical speech but their *PC* has no Diplomacy skill or Charisma, I'd tell them straight out that they're playing their character wrong, just like I would if the player with the INT 6 Half Orc is the one figuring out all the puzzles in the game. I may or may not give them a pass that one time because people can have strange flashes of brilliance once in a while, but what the player was doing would effectively be metagaming and I wouldn't let that become a habit.
>>
>>44673489
Before or after they start thinking about starting a family?
>>
>>44673631
Before of course, they'd be vulnerable to seduction within that time frame otherwise.
>>
>>44673676
I don't think allmost anyone will want to be a guard then.
>>
>>44672255
>high fantasy
>not bullshit

please die
>>
>>44673676
So you'd make sure that everyone who joins the guard is unable to start a family? That both means they have no future and no strong tie to this town they're guarding other than duty, and you're cutting out the people who genetically are best suited for guard work.
>>
>>44673915
It's like no one actually knows the definitions of High/Low fantasy any more and just shouts about it being one way or the other.

Yes it was high fantasy, but probably not for the reasons you're imagining.
>>
>>44667696

Only if you allow the splat dumpster diving to make it possible.
>>
>>44673915
That's pretty hostile m8.
>>
>>44673759
>>44674069
I think you guys are taking the joke just a tad too seriously.
>>
>>44669140
Sorry Alfie, not happening. Your mother would skin me alive and make boots out of my hide.
>>
>>44674322
>Your mother would skin me alive and make boots out of my hide
>letting that stop you
Faaaaaaaaaaaag.
>>
>>44667866
/thread
>>
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>>44674188
Castration is not a very funny joke.
>>
>>44674872
It can be when it's offered as an obviously tongue-in-cheek solution. I can see why penis might not be amused though.
>>
>>44667829
Sweden, you can tell by the rifle.
>>
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>>44667702
You are actually fucking stupid. I'm laughing my ass off right now.
>>
>>44667621
"Fix" it? It's not a problem.

No, I'm 100% serious. What's your issue in this scenario?
>>
>>44667621
>b8 for the b8 god, rage for the rage throne!
>>
>>44677365
Who's even raging, though? It isn't bait, it's just dumb.
>>
You see here, this is an easy fix. When your players are trying to pull of some fuckery, you need to stop them. An easy method goes as follows...
>Seductive from PC as she leans on a metal signpost
>Guard gets a boner, but continues to speak with her about the crimes she'd committed
>A woman just across the street sees the boner, starts fanning herself
>The gusts of wind from fanning herself blow away a stray hair that was on her neck
>The hair falls down and lands on a cat
>The cat flips its shit, as it is severely autistic, and runs away
>Cat is chased by a dog, further giving it reason to haul ass
>Dog catches cat, brutally murders it
>Dog contracts tapeworms and mentally scars a little girl
>Little girl was with her father, who is armed
>Father murders the dog
>The dog-god is displeased by this development and smites the father with lightning
>Lightning kills the father
>Electric current moves underground through a very conveniently placed vein of conductive metal
>Vein of metal brings the current towards PC
>Travels up and into a sign post (metal, of course)
>PC is shocked and dies in a twitching, burnt heap
>GOOD END
>>
>>44677632
Well typically bait is an attempt to induce rage. It is not always successful, even if the intent is there.
>>
>>44678258
Then it's an attempt at bait, but it didn't turn out. Intended bait but not actualized.
>>
>>44668309
Have you seen a Welshman
>>
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>>44667621
non human town guards who have no interest in law breaking monkey ass.
>>
I roll to seduce~
>>
>>44667621
Doesn't work that way. Diplomacy, intimidate and bluff raise how the NPC by one rank. it doesn't make them automatically friendly.
>>
>>44667702
>frog face
>trashy, shit, must be purged by /fa/ fashion sense of a whore

She's just shit. See: >>44677141

>that shitty book cover art

Why was normie art design in the 60's through 90's so atrocious, especially when everything from movie posters, rock albums covers, and rpgs were generally good?
>>
>>44667866
>>10: Guard will take bribe/sexual favors, but arrest the PCs anyway.
I like this one
>>
>>44667831
Not when they're all gay amazons, anon.
>>
>>44667866
>penalty
>not just a higher tn

Why?.jpg
>>
>>44667696
You also forget the guards roll with bonuses to not be swayed by your shit.
>>
>>44681431
Are you dumb? I'd have fucked OP girl to death.

Reading your post, are you high?
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