>Party is 4-5th level
>Negotiating with two lion tamer dudes in a necropolis.
>GM intentionally misinterprets Wizard's negotiation attempt and starts the combat
>Sics two fucking DIRE LIONS (CR5 each) and a pair of well-armed trainers on a party of 5 4-5th level adventurers.
>Dire Lions deal average party member's HP PER ROUND
Seriously, fuck this guy. Y'all got any stories of similar asshole GMs?
We're as optimized as he'll allow us to be. As it is, I went in missing a fucking class feature because of his stupid poison houserules (still poisoned after passing the saves, must wait 24 hours, while you have poison, you can't heal HP or ability damage)
I like a good challenge as much as anyone, but he springs "surprise" house rulings on us, runs his campaigns like rougelikes, and then whines that nobody ever roleplays.
The wizard (who, to be fair, is kind of an ass) was offering to buy the lions, in the interest of establishing rapport (the guys claimed to be lion trainers).
He offers to buy them for gold; the trainer says he wants a bank check instead (wtf?) because we could just kill him and take the gold. The wizard replies that if our intent was to kill them, we would have already tried. The GM took this as him threatening to kill the guy, and starts combat immediately.
>playing a rogue in pathfinder
>gm is running a setting like dark sun where magic saps the life from the world, so no one in the party runs a caster
>game is going really well, everyone is having fun
>suddenly gm gets a bf
>he wants to join our game
>'sure why not'
>gm makes a character for him
>it's a fucking wizard
>the rest of the group and i are upset, ask gm why
>'he looked in the rulebook and said he wanted to play that class guys, don't worry about it, he'll be like the last good wizard alive or something'
>we look at eachother but continue playing
>gm told him to not to pick any big destructive spells like fireball
>well at least he won't be overpowe--
>he picks invisibility and a whole bunch of utility spells instead
>can open doors that would previously needed to be opened by me and stealth way better than i could, i can do nothing now except for backstabbing because the wizard outperforms me
>more charismatic than anyone in the party so the gm more or less allows him to become the party's spokesman even when we disagree with him
>gm starts throwing monsters way above our level at us, ones that we can only really have a chance with when the bf wizard is casting his buffs
>we complain to the gm that he's taking over the game
>'look guys, he's my boyfriend, if you have an issue with the way he plays tell him!'
>we talk with him
>he says that the gm basically tells him what to do before every session and has been leading him along this whole time, he doesn't really care to play the game otherwise
>the rest of the group and i are pissed, go to the gm again
>'guys this is my game, i know you have your issues but can we at least finish the campaign? we're almost done!'
>get into the last session, have high hopes that the gm will address our problems
>we need to invade a fortress
>party starts to plan an epic break-in
>the doors are immune to magic so it's my time to shine
[Obligatory "bank checks existed before full plate did" post]
But seriously bank checks existed as far back as the Crusades. The main idea was that you don't have to carry a truckload of gold (and thus paint a huge target on your head) from Europe to Jerusalem when you went on a pilgrimage.
>'okay so the rogue will take point, ranger go with him so he doesn't get his ass jumped, bard will try and distract guards on the inside (she diplomanced her way into being royalty a while back and was going to get as many guards as she could into an orgy so we could kill them all at once when get got in)'
>'the fighter and wizard will wait behind.'
>bf wizard speaks up
>'guys, uh, we don't need to do all this'
>'my character knows a secret passage that leads right into the lord's chambers, we can just use this'
>he displays a drawn map of the route
>a map clearly drawn by the fucking gm
>we all begin to crumple up our break-in plans and character sheets and throw them to the floor
>gm starts panic
>'guys guys, it's okay, he knows a guy in character who gave him the map!'
>we aren't even listening at this point
>the rest of us pack up and go out to a buffet and swear to never play one of the gm's games again
God fucking damn I hate this shit, we spent over a year on that campaign.
>>hey let's threaten the dangerous beast tamers
>>yeah let's let the lions full attack us over and over again because we have no system mastery
hit points! There's NO WAY that we could deal that much damage
>>mfw my party's level four
barddealt 70 damage in two rounds last session
>waaah, the encounter was really hard
>it's not like I could have done anything out of the ordinary like carry around 3 pounds of volatile magic lizard spit for just such an occasion
>it's not like I could have picked up beast pheromones from the last village to turn the Lions on their gamers
>it's not like I'm a 5th level wizard who can do both of the aforementioned things
Damm, what shit way to end a year long campgain.
Why is it that whenever GM's get a gf/bf they always bring them into the game and basicly write fanfiction for them and disregard the other players and the story of the campgain?
We really couldn't. As explained previously, we're under geared because he won't let us but or sell shit, underpowered because of houseruled poison bullshit, and since he decided to adjust our map placement, the wizard got instagibbed.
>The wizard replies that if our intent was to kill them, we would have already tried.
>The GM took this as him threatening to kill the guy, and starts combat immediately.
Talk shit get hit.