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would you an orc woman
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You are currently reading a thread in /tg/ - Traditional Games

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would you an orc woman
>>
>>34460907
Sure. I basically never stop an orc woman.
>>
>>34460907
Where do you think you are?
>>
So when did this "Orc females are green elves with people with a muscle fetish" fad begun? I bet it's WoW fault.
>>
>>34460907
Depends entirely on the type of orc

Is it a green African woman with fangs? Sure.

Is it a monster? No.
>>
Not if they look like that. I hate the hair.
>>
>>34460907
Many
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>>34460945
skyrim did its part as well.
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>>34460945
Technically since The Elder Scrolls, if you want to get picky.
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>>34460975
I fully admit to fapping to my female orc in skyrim
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>>34460945
>blaming WoW

The orc women models are pretty ugly, there's only one decent looking face that everyone picks.

The setting itself wasn't too terrible either. They did the typical elves and dwarves in a more creative way and things only started to suck during/post WotLK
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I wish this series was good. I want to get into it, but the less than abysmal reviews turn me away each time.
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>>34461023
that the same guy that wrote Dwarves?
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>>34460907
>implying my fetish isn't having snuu snuu with a 7 foot tall orc female
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>>34461032

No, the covers are similar however.

I wish all fantasy books were named like that. I wanna read about wizards, nigga. Name the book Wizard.
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>>34460907
absolutely heretical
>>
>>34461122
I can imagine the questions book store employees would get
>What is this book about?
>Wizards
>How did you know?
>It's called Wizards you dumb cunt
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>>34460993
Amen to that.
>>
>>34461023
I read the start of that when I was about 13.

Never got very far. Starts with a sex scene between a queen and a prisoner where the queen stabs the guy as he cums. I read that bit a lot of times.

Can't remember anything else.
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>>34460907
My 12yo boy sorc is receiving mixed signals from my 25yo half orc barbarian if it counts.

Not sure if shes doing a big sister thing or if im being subtly courted.
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>>34460907
Every hour of every day.
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>>34460907
Would you not?
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>>34461223
We already answered your question in the previous threads.
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>>34461218
Why are you me.
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>>34461249
>>
>>34461223
is the other player is a man, he is probably a latent homosexual
>>
>>34460998
I can understand the WoW blame. Look at all the female character models, especially the Horde races. Orc, troll, tauren, and worgen males are all hunched over. The females of those races apparently have their vertebrae fused. Worgen is far and above the worst offender, given that they altered the eyes as well.
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>>34461286
Tauren have best females.

I only played the lvl20 trial and I can still safely say that they are my favorite race
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>>34461067
>implying that that's not everyone's fetish, they just don't know it yet.
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>>34461218
You forgot the part about the unicorn horn dildo.

But yeah, thats where I also dropped it 10 years ago and never picked it up again.
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>>34461260
It felt like a big sister thing then, but on our last session (we play MWF). My PC woke up with her snuggled up next to me along with some fancy RP chat.

Pretty much put me back on square one
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>>34461278
>latent homosexual
You forgot the B.
>>
>>34461122
That is obviously his place. All that weeab shit. The dragon statue. Do you not see how big his entry way is? pls he planned this party... Why do you have to make me cry /tg/?
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>>34461196
Well I'm going to re-install now
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>>34461023
>>34461218
>>34461337
i also read that series when i was about 13
and i liked it.
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>>34461393
Could be his roommate's party.
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>>34461423
Don't forget to mod the shit out of it.
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>>34461023
this book got me into fantasy. The beginning scene with them taking the fort especially
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>>34461439
'homestead' it was called. i think.
i read it in dutch
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>>34461196
>>34460993
My brothers.
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>>34461438
What's the point of playing if you don't?
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>>34461462
Not so fast there I fapped to my male orc aswell
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>>34461337
>>
>>34461476
Suffering.And now I have the urge to actually play the character rather than just fapping to her.
>>
>>34461495
...

...

...My half-brother?
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>>34461459
I read it in german. The low scale battle just felt great. They werent heroic per se, but every single warrior had a lot of weight in the battle.
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>>34461511
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>>34461531
What mods?

Are there lewd mods yet?
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>>34461579
>tfw you are the only one who dumps orcess pics
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>>34461604
Yeah, and please stop. None of these are orcs.
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>>34461565
it was one of the first fantasy's i ever read.
it was also one of the first book i read with some hardcore gore in it.
in the same battle he disembowels some dude with his sword. made me cringe
i really liked the dwarf who was with them.
>>
>>34461599
>Elder Scrolls modding community
>Having to ask this

I think it's even viable to change it into a pseudo Monstergirl Quest H game. You can definitely do so in Oblivion, but that clipping.
>>
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>>34461604
>>
>>34460975
>>34460976

To be fair Skyrim Orcs genuinely are corrupted Elves.

They're also Japanese Jews.

Mainly my issue is with people making hot Orc women in settings where all the Orc men are barely sapient savages.
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>>34461616
Except they are all Orcs and Half-Orcs you Skyrim fuck face.
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>>34461652
>where all the Orc men are barely sapient savages.

I'm glad I don't live in Africa, either. Heyoooooo.

I'm here all night.
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>>34461652
Except they're hot as fuck barely sapient savages
>>
ooga booga where da elf wimmen at
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>>34461650

I like that orc kid. He's cute.
>>
>>34461671
this is just a nikker with bad dental care
>>
>>34461652
You know, I never could fathom the point of orcs. If you make them about to be related to, they're just muscular humans, but if you make them monstrous, they're just monsters and could be replaced by a horde of bugs or some other menace that can't be reasoned with.
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>>34461286
New models doe
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>>34461218
>ever got very far. Starts with a sex scene between a queen and a prisoner where the queen stabs the guy as he cums.

Sounds like typical drow fuckery. Say what you want about orcs, they'll stab you in battle not in the bedroom.
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>>34461730
You know, I never could fathom the point of elves. If you make them about to be related to, they're just pointy-eared immortal humans, but if you make them monstrous, they're just monsters and they could be replaced by a swarm of banshees or some other menace that can't be reasoned with.
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>>34461775
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>>34461730
They can represent strange and foreign people.

Throughout time peoples have looked to their neighbours and been vaguely horrified, scared and disgusted by the stuff they do.

They don't have to be exactly the same as humans or ravening monsters, they can be an alien culture with different rules to us and at times come across as either surprisingly similar to humans or as the monsters that burn down villages.
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>>34461796
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>>34461637
It was a thinly veiled request to link said lewd
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>>34461730
>>34461785

You know, I never could fathom the point of Halflings. If you make them about to be related to, they're just short, hairy-footed humans, but if you make them monstrous, they're just monsters and they could be replaced by a swarm of rats or some other menace that can't be reasoned with.
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>>34461785

> I never could fathom the point of elves.

The best elf I've ever known was on the end of my magma trap.
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>>34461811
Why not just make them humans with a different culture then?
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>>34461818
>They can represent

Your mum is represented through my dick m8
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>>34461823
>You know, I never could fathom the point of humans. If you make them about to be related to, they're just humans, but if you make them monstrous, they're just humans and they could be replaced by a swarm of rats or some other menace that can't be reasoned with.
>>
>>34461837

Because that's improper for our politically correct society.

Instead of being honest about our racism and sexism, we hide it behind a mocking veneer of tolerance.
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>>34461599
>What mods?
Let me see here, Extended Character Edit and Raceplus for racemenu shenanigans, CBBE body, Mature skin textures with CBBE spectral maps(I think it was that atleast), Eyes of Beauty, Nuhairstyles for the hair. Dragonbone barbarian for the armour. I think that's all the mods is for my wai-fu. http://www.tesgeneral.com/#!waifu/ch1j but this guide is handy anyway.

>Are there lewd mods yet?
A metric fuckton. Check loverslab for the Sexlab framework. Thank me later.

>>34461652
>Mainly my issue is with people making hot Orc women in settings where all the Orc men are barely sapient savages.
This is a huge pet-peeve for me aswell. Personally I go with attractive Orcs of both genders being a thing, but something most races consider a rarity.
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>>34461796
>>34461818
Ahhh fucking yeah
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>>34461730
>>34461785
>>34461823
You know, I never could fathom the point of humans. If you make them about to be related to, they're just humans, but if you make them monstrous, they're just monsters and they could be replaced by a horde of gorillas or some other menace that can't be reasoned with.
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That's a silly question.
Without a moment's hesitation, of course. They can smell doubt know. Men lose their dicks that way
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>>34461862
Thank you anon

Time for shame
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>>34461832
>>34461823
You know, I never could fathom the point of Dwarves. If you make them about to be related to, they're just short, stocky jews, but if you make them monstrous, they're just monsters and they could be replaced by a swarm of rats or some other menace that can't be reasoned with.
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>>34460907
fake orc barbarian.
if she had lived a barbarian life she would not be squatting like that. That is the squatting of a civilized, shoe-wearing person.
Barbarians squat with the entirety of their foot touching the ground.
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>>34461730
They're the 'Other', the savage man-beast that lives to do nothing but plunder, pillage and rape. Basically, a reflection of mankinds baser, more primitive tendencies.
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>>34461785
It doesn't work because the entire point of elves isn't "they're evil and ruin everything for everyone" as it is with orcs in most settings.
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>>34461894
You know, I never could fathom the point of Gnomes. If you make them about to be related to, they're just short, retarded humans, but if you make them monstrous, they're just monsters and they could be replaced by a swarm of leeches or some other menace that can't be reasoned with.
>>
>>34461637
>>34461599
>skyrim lewdmods
various sex quest mods
prostitution mods
rape mods
spriggan TF/BDSM quest mod
necrophelia
tentacles
pregnancy
tentacle pregnancy
adjustable penis mod with varying penis sizes and penis physics
also for women
sex with pretty much every type of NPC

Same shit with fallout.
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>>34461934
So humans?
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>>34461948
>adjustable penis mod with varying penis sizes and penis physics
SoS is the funniest shit.
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>>34461989
Without what makes us civilized people, yes.
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>>34461894
>>
>>
Anyone have some non-green orcs?
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>>34462079
Now that's just a greenskin edit
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>>34462163
>Male elf on Orc female
This is my fetish.
>>
>>34461616
Nigga they ain't real
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>>34462079
Dayum
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>>34461894
They're scottish, not Jews
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>>34462267
Tell Tolkien that.
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>>34462279
Excessive drinking, fighting and hardiness are Scottish stereotypes, not Jewish ones.
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>>34462267
No, that's pop culture turning Gimli into a race.
>>
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>>34460907
Hell yeah I would.
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>>34462306
You don't get through being hated by everyone you meet for 3000 years without being a little hardy
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>>34462267
I always thought they were Germans.
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>>34462306
That's the part everyone likes about dwarves, but that's only 1/2 of their image. You forgot the hoarding, insular attitude, traditionalism, greed, grudges, etc.
>>
>>34462397
Thats still scottish m8
>>
>>34462397
Jewish Scots
Scottish Jews
>>
>>34462306
>Excessive drinking and fighting are only Scottish
Read the Bible, nigga. The three things the Jews did there -- and had done since pre-Medieval times -- is drink, kill, and try to survive the purges.
>>
>>34462442
But did they do that around Tolkien?
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>>34462440
Jewish Scots don't really exist. Especially not in Tolkein's time.
>>
Would I date an orc woman? Going to watch arena battles with her? Going out to eat in fancy, dimly-lit restaurants with soft mood music in the background? Meet her parents and family and have a good time bar-b-queing steaks and burgers with her dad while she and her mom catch up on the latest day-to-day life? Curl up next to a fire on a cold winter night and just enjoy each other's company? Get married to her and have a few kids to raise into great warriors? Grow old together in the quiet countryside blissfully enjoying the scenery?

Nah, I'd just fuck her and leave.
>>
>>34461032
NO.

the Markus heitz books about the dwarves and the Albae (no idea how they are called in english, the anti-elves-whatever) are awesome. At the same time some other Autors made books about Halflings, Elves, Orks, Ogres. But most of them have nothing to do with each other.
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>>34462461
No, but Tolkien did take a good deal of inspiration from the Bible as well as Norse mythology when it came to crafting his mythos.
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>>34462535
He also lived in the UK and most likely knew a hell of a lot more scots than he did Jews.
And going by stereotypes at the time, Dwarves are closer to scots. Just like Hobbits are the English.
>>
Apparently the Dwarves got the scottish accent because of Gimli's actor in the LOTR radio play.

The Dwarven language is based off of semitic languages. Just something to take note of.
>>
>>34462504
>Would I date an orc woman? Going to watch arena battles with her? Going out to eat in fancy, dimly-lit restaurants with soft mood music in the background? Meet her parents and family and have a good time bar-b-queing steaks and burgers with her dad while she and her mom catch up on the latest day-to-day life? Curl up next to a fire on a cold winter night and just enjoy each other's company? Get married to her and have a few kids to raise into great warriors? Grow old together in the quiet countryside blissfully enjoying the scenery?

fuck mang I feel all fuzzy inside now
>>
>>34462576
...just read his letters and logs. He based the Dorf-culture and language on Semitics.
>>
>>34462576

Yeah, it's the scots whose language is structured around tri-consonantal roots and mourn by sitting in their homes, tearing their clothes, and not getting up for seven days.


It's the scots who are a scattered, wandering people, taken in by societies but always in the outsider role.
>>
>>34462606
>missing the punchline
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>>34462504
>Nah, I'd just fuck her and leave.

You must be a goblin.
>>
>>34462576
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dwarf_%28Middle-earth%29
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>>34461837
Well, many parts of orcish culture tend to be based on their physiology, such as a much more powerful average physique or low natural life span. You could just make them humans with those traits, but eh, people like orcs and those wouldn't really fit people's image of humans.
>>
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>>34462646
>implying I didn't ignore the punchline on purpose because I want to feel fuzzy
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You're no craftsman, you suck
You're a mediocre piece of shit, you can't even smelt
You suck
I've been crafting 41 years
You suck
I'm a left handed blacksmith
You suck
No
No
No
You go, get the fuck out
Get the fuck out (rears up trash bag of holding as man crafts an axe poorly)
Get out
Fuck you
Fucking asshole
>>
>>34462504
>Nah, I'd just fuck her and leave.
You monster.
>>
>>34462694

>such as a much more powerful average physique or low natural life span


If we're going Tolkien, neither of these are true.
>>
>>34462576

... What.

He literally stated he based the Dwarves off Jews, right down to their language being Semitic.
>>
>>34462622
>>34462610
Chill out niggas, just making a case of how they could be scottish, I don't speak yiddish.
dwarves will always be Scottish in my mind
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>>34462704
>trash bag of holding

Well played, I guess.

It's always a sad sight when one of your dwarves goes insane.
>>
>>34461837
because fuck you asshole, i can do whatever i want.
>>
>>34462723
Was not going tolkien, no. Was going for the majority of modern orcs and why people keep using them.
>>
>>34462728

Because you don't read (or understand) Tolkien, and just work on his various successors like Warhammer.
>>
>>34461837
Why not just make them orcs?
>>
>>34462306

>Jews don't like to fight

Have you even read the Bible?

A book doesn't go by when they aren't exterminating a tribe or two while begging God to help them.

>Excessive drinking

Tolkien Dwarves don't drink - at least, they don't drink nearly as much as the stereotype. They're a grim, hard and decidedly *sober* people.
>>
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>>34462770
Yes, for the reasons I have stated that is why I think Dwarves are Scottish.
>>
>>34462802
>Jews don't like to fight
Krav-Maga please?
>>
>>34462804

Yes, by citing a bunch of stereotypes that don't exist in Tolkien and mostly entered the genre through Sword of Shannara and Warhammer.


Ergo, the conclusion that you didn't read Tolkien very carefully, or at all.
>>
>>34462823

Bro I was agreeing with the idea that Jews love a good fight, the guy I was responding to said fighting was a "Scottish" thing, not a Jewish thing.

>>34462804

Live and let live I guess.

You're wrong to assume Dwarves are Scottish, but I doubt any of us will convince you otherwise, so I hope you have fun with your preconceptions.
>>
>>34461652
>hot Orc women in settings where all the Orc men are barely sapient savages.

>He hasn't seen the instructions
>>
>>34462402
Seriously, every joke that is known in America as a Jew joke is known in the UK as a Scottish joke, from the invention of copper wire on down.
>>
>>34462852
my bad
also fighting is everyone's thing, especially in tg-related activities
>>
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>>34462858
everything about that image seems right to me
>>
>>34462858
>>
>>34461023
The first trilogy is great. I read a little of the second trilogy and didn't like the change in tone. Read the first omnibus.
>>
>>34461837
They are. We just paint them green and call them orcs because fantasy is fantasical
>>
>>34462851
>>34462852
Is it so wrong that I perceive a fantasy race in a particular way?
I don't know shit about jews, never met a jew or read the bible. I do on the other hand live in Scotland and have lived my life as a scot, hearing all the jokes about how we're cheap and rowdy (Its fuckin true though)
>>
>>34462858
>wildstar.jpg
>>
>>34462928
Fucking bleh.
>>
>>34461196
Is that the dragonbone barbarian armor? Muh nigga.
>>
>>34462961
Are you >>34462576?

If you're not, this isn't about you.

If you are, this isn't about how you perceive dwarves in general fantasy. This is about how you claimed Tolkien designed dwarves. People called you out, proved you wrong, and now you're trying to claim something else?
>>
>>34462961

>Is it so wrong that I perceive a fantasy race in a particular way?


No.

What's wrong is that you're making factually erroneous statements, by saying Tolkien drew on scottish stereotypes to make Dwarves a certain way, when Dwarves don't have those stereotypes in his work.


Because heavy drinking in more associated with elves than dwarves in Tolkien, and the dwarves are explicitly acknowledged to be pretty crappy fighters, Thorin and co set out without a weapon between them, and Thorin does his damage to the trolls in that fight in the beginning of the hobbit with a branch he pulled from their fire. Gimli's the only example of martial prowess, what with his 42 kills at the Hornburg, but even he remarks that he doesn't want to tangle with the Dunlandings, that they're too tall and have too much reach on him. You know, ordinary human semi-barbarians.
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>>34460907
... would you not?

Is your flabby body unprepared for true snu-snu?
>>
>>34463086
>>34463091
Ffs, I didn't know tolkein said that he based his dwarves on Jews, dwarves seemed to fit scottish stereotypes of the time.
I was putting forward an opinion that was wrong and in the case of
>>34463086
I was responding to >>34462851
>>34462852
>Why I think dwarves are scottish
>>
>>34462858
>>34462163

How would you even go about designing a race with such extreme sexual dimorphism that one or both genders would prefer to mate with other species?
>>
>>34460907
> Would you an X?
> implying /tg/ would ever say no
>>
>>34463152
Now can we all calm down and get back to shitposting about sexy green women?
>>
>>34463186

I wouldn't, because that is some magical realm bullshit right there.
If they have extreme sexual dimorphism, they would be attracted TO that dimorphic trait. Thus the Pretty Orc girl would be attracted to huge hulking brutes, and humans would look unappealing to her.
>>
>>34463240

I wouldn't an orc male
>>
>>34463306
I would.
>>
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>>34462928
disgusting
>>
>>34463361
ditto
>>
>>34463122

Matter of fact it is
>>
>>34463240
>/tg/ is a person
epic bro
>>
>>34460907
I don't date black chicks.
>>
>>34461223
Go for the /ss/, for great justice
>>
>>34461337
Is that supposed to be an ork? Because it aint. Its a black chick.
>>
>>34462704
Who is this picture of? As far as I can tell, it's some anti-freedom lobbiest who freaks out and throws trashbags.
>>
>>34463240
I might be perverted but at least I wouldn't a poopy
>>
>>34460907
My first girlfriend was a black /fit/izen who could pick me up and carry me, so I basically already have
>>
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>everyone is posting green elves or at best half-orcs

In profile, orcs are thicker than humans, their frames are comparatively a bit more hunched and squat, their faces are rounder, and their features are less defined. Or at least that's just the way I like them.
>>
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>>34463910
>>
>>34463959
>>
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>>34463986
>>
>>34463751
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ha7smLPz2GY
>>
>>34461531
Son of a BITCH I can never get my orcs to look that good.
>>
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>>34464018
>>
>>34464049
Do you hate me more if I say it wasn't particularly hard to get her to look that good?
>>
>>34464125
>>
Post pig orcs
>>
>>34461023

it's the truth, I forced myself through the first one, desperately hoping it got better. It didn't The second was even worse. I wish it was a "Black Company" for orcs.

>I would orc man or woman.
>>
>>34464021
new yorkers are the worst.
>>
>>34464021
good lord, is it too much trouble to turn a phone sideways or something?
>>
>>34461223
>My 12yo boy sorc
>my 25yo half orc
>MY

You do realize that we usually play these role playing games wit hone character per-person, right?
>>
>>34464021
>all those le ebin fake jew accounts
>>
>>34463186
What? It's not that unbelievable. Some people have a fetish for those of other races. Hell, some people have a fetish for animals!
>>
>>34465043
yeah, but with orcs it's the norm. at least, in a lot of bullshit versions.
>>
>>34461173
There is actually a book called Wizards.

It's a collection of short stories about wizards. Imagine that. There's also one called Warriors and one called Rogues. Gardner Dozois and George R.R. Martin put them together.
>>
>>34465043
Yellow Fever, Jungle Fever, Tartan Fever, Nile Fever. Why's it always "Fever"?
I am well aware that it's a play on "getting hot"
>>
>>34465043
I bet races in Fantasy and Scifi with hooves or no legs (nagas, etc) can have pretty extreme foot fetishes. Or lactation/nipples if they don't have those. Especially sweating if they can't sweat.
>>
>>34465106
>Tartan Fever
>Nile Fever

What?
>>
My current character is a half-orc half-elf. His mom was the orc side.
>>
>>34464154
Yup.
>>
>>34465160

The first one is clearly about having a thing for Scots. Apparently a lot of women do based on the romance section of the bookstore I work at.
The latter, I dunno. Middle easterners, I guess?
>>
>>34463910
Thank you.

>tfw no one draws ugly orcs anymore
>>
>>34460945
How would you prefer orc women?
>>
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>>34460945
WoW orc women are actually more orcish than the average
>>
mmmmmm, tusky blowjob.
>>
>>34464154
Seriously, can you post a guide or advise or something?
>>
>>34465516
It's a modded game. use google
>>
>>34463285
>If they have extreme sexual dimorphism, they would be attracted TO that dimorphic trait.
wisdom
>>
>>34464049
>bimbofied to hell
>good
>>
>>34465106
>Why's it always "Fever"?
because it passes. Or if they're racist they're also saying that its an illness and that only a person that is sick could want that.
Same with calling something a fetish, can just mean something rare that they like or could be a way for someone to denigrate the source of their lust while still pining for it.
>>
>>34461023

It's not bad. Dimestore fantasy, yeah, but it's a quick read and a nice tweaking of the genre.
>>
>>34461196
>>34461423
whats this game name? is it online, like warcraft?
>>
>>34466208
2/10
>>
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Sure I could fuck the shit out of her in the roughest way possible and she would be okay with it.
>>
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>>34461286
females were never hunched as far as i can remeber, aside from undeads and tauren girls, but orcs, trolls, blood elves and goblin females, arent hunched

>>34461761
the new male models are still hunched my friend, dont know why they dont make taurens with a normal back just a like any other minotaur, same with orcs, they draw them un-hunched but ingame they are, also trolls they are they tallest race but this doesnt show unless they stand still and they dont do this too often, as for undeads, i would preffer them slightly leaned but not hunched

they didnt hunched the blood elves because they were the "pretty" race of the horde
>>
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>>34466689
>>34461761
forgot pic
>>
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>>
>>
I have a friend who would an orc.
His reasons:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zqy2v6HS-lU
>>
>>34466220
what?
>>
>>34466904
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ReIH2fglE0
Superior version. Posted wrong video.
>>
>>34466208
>>34466927

The game is called Skyrim. It was probably THE most popular game for like a year after it came out, a couple of years ago.
>>
>>34466951
>falling for bait
>>
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>>
>>34466977

Hey, some people totally do live under rocks.
>>
>>34466977
>calling honest questions that don't appear to make anyone angry bait
Is this bait?
>>
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>>34466798
She's actually kinda cute in a strange way.
>>
>>34467175
>affectionate appearance
>seemingly happy about supporting other creatures
>non-threatening posture

Not really that weird, man.
>>
>>34467005
Well, duh, Orc thread, remember?
>>
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>>
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>>
>>
>>34461908
Squatting on the front of your feet is shoe-related?
>>
>>34462961
Dio, go home
>>
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>>34466951
thanks but, it isnt online right?

>>34466977
no it wasnt bait, i literaly dont know about the game, but if we talk about world of warcraft i might have some knowledge to share

>>34467005
>Hey, some people totally do live under rocks.
well, i guess i cant say anything to defend myself about it

>>34467265
>Orc thread, remember?
i actually dont have many females, but heres my small contribution
>>
>>34467523

You know, shoe-related crime is up 12% this year.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=mCd0jJSOBeU#t=5181
>>
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>>34463703
I always thought it was a halfling
>>
>>34467750
It isn't online. There is The Elder Scrolls Online, which is based on the same series, but you do not want to play it. Trust me.
>>
>>34467750
We have TES threads regularly on this board. There's a constant general on /vg/. /v/ probably talks about it occasionally but that place is a cancerous shithole so I don't blame you for not being there.

How the fuck did you miss all the launch advertisement anyways? 11.11.11 was a big fucking deal for them.
>>
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I would snuggle with an orc __boy.
>>
>>34467885
>you do not want to play it. Trust me.
ok i trust you, heh, ill see where i can download the normal skyrim game and give it a try, thanks

>>34467925
all i can say is dont watch much tv cus i actually dont have one on my room
>>
>>34461122
>tfw i have been that guy

of course i am ripped shitty and handsome as fuck, but I have still been that guy
>>
>>34468061
It's on Steam - buy or pirate the legendary edition, it has all the official DLC. One for vampire hunting and crossbows, another for comfy housing, and the last is 100% references to a past entry in the series that'll go completely over your head. /tg/ has a lot of TES threads, I recommend stopping by one next time it pops up.
>>
>>34468061
Still doesn't have to be TV.

Also just go to /vg/ or something and ask in the general about the game. Most people are going to tell you to at least play the previous 2 installments of the game as well, if not before you play Skyrim.

I mean you don't have to, but I would recommend it. Also the lore for the game is completely fucking insane and I love it but the games themselves suck dick at telling it so read the fucking in game books.
>>
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>>34468154
>previous 2 installments
Previous 4 installments. And only ask /vg/ for help modding it or for lewd/waifu mods. They're absolutely useless otherwise. Hell, if you're not avatarfagging/namefagging they might not even respond.
>>
>>34468228
I said most people and at least. Key fucking words there. Few people are going to tell you to work your ass to make Arena or Daggerfall work. Also tesg does have a website that has a good modlist and basically teaches you everything. It should be in their OP.
>>
>>34468124
yeah i was just reading about the additional content on wikipedia, seems nice

>>34468154
thanks about it too, i still dont know about getting the books, reading on a pc burns my eyes
>>
>>34462802
>Jews don't like to fight
It's like you've never read the Bible, or watched the news at any point in the last 2 months
>>
>>34463240
>You can have any of these alien women of varying structures and biologies
>or the Mystery Box
>>
>>34468323
Just read the fucking books. Kill your monitor's brightness/contrast if your eyes are about to explode or play in decent light.
>>
>>34468354
>implying 4channers can resist the mystery box
>>
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>>34468354
>>
>>34468017
Are you a mature elf woman?
>>
>>34468592
Don't be gay.
>>
>>34460907
Hey, tg-
Would you any vagina regardless of what it's attached too?
>>
>>34468694
No fat chicks
>>
>>34468694
Not entirely regardless, but I'll admit the range of things with vaginas that I would is larger than is altogether healthy and sane.
>>
>>34468354
mystery box. every. damn. time.
>>
>>34468758
If that wasn't the case you wouldn't be a true Elegan/tg/entleman or Ca/tg/irl
>>
>>34468704
Fat chicks don't exist in fantasay settings.
>>
>>34461023
>>34461218
Hm.
My brother owns that book.
I'm thinking that I don't want to read it now.
>>
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>>34468354
>>
>>34468935
David. If you kill him, he will win.
>>
>>34468354
Can i fuck the box?
>>
>>34468644
>not wanting interspecies /ss/
No YOU not be gay
>>
>>34468592
>young adult orc male
>mature adult elf female
or
>young adult elf male
>mature adult orc female
>>
>>34463703
>>34461337
Choclate elf
>>
>>34465134
>you will never have a Naga girl-friend wrap you up in her coils so that she can feel the sweat and heat pour off of you as you make love.
Truly this world is suffering.
>>
>>34468385
i cant, my monitor's + button doesnt work so if i lower the brightness i wont be able to change it back later
>>
>>34469789
srs...
>>
>>34465640
Although it depends on which gender drives sexual selection - For example peahens like peacocks with big flashy tails, but there doesn't seem to be a similar selective trait in the females, because it's the females who choose who mates with them. So if in orcish society the males pick females on the basis of how un-orcish they appear while the females get no say in who they mate with then there is biased sexual selection. (It would also some way to explaining all the rape and half-orcs - orc males encounter humans or elves and assume they are super feminine orcs so commence sexy times and don't take no for an answer because orc women don't say no)

This is not my magical realm, honest
>>
>>34466208
Battletoads
>>
>>34469741
>you will never be snuggling with your naga gf one night
>she will never timidly ask you if she can touch your feet
>you will never oblige her and hold back a smile at her adorable look of puzzlement as she inspects them
>you will never answer her silly questions about how they work and feel
>you will never try not to laugh as she plays with your toes

Why even live?
>>
>>34469789
You should be able to change the brightness without touching the monitor.
>>
what if there are no female Orcs and they breed like Oglaf barbarians, and the rape of other species womenfolk is just them showing the superiority of men in general and Orcs in particular. The closest you can get to your Orc-waifu is a half-Orc one.
>>
>>34470015
That sounds honorable
>>
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>>34470015
but then that means all the orcs would die off. leaving only half-orcs. Then they would die off and only leave 1/4th orcs and so on.
Where would we be without fullblooded orcs?
>>
>>34469908
heh, sorry but somebody already answered me

>>34469969
really? how?
>>
>>34470128
>mid-east orcs
I need more of this
>hijab-wearing orc gals
I need this more
>>
>>34470130
Should be in the power options section if you have it, otherwise it'll probably be in the screen section of the control panel
>>
>>34470183
Syria is most kawaii

Egypt close second
>>
You don't read Oglaf do you?
>>
>>34470264
the ones with exposed hair are automatically good-tier at least
>>
>>34468405
because he said 'or'
>>
>>34470309
>wanting sluts who expose their hair for all men to see
>>
>>34470423
But there isn't really a reason not to go for both.
>>
>>34470463
Right, except that's not an option.

If you could buy a car and also keep all the money, yeah, that'd also be cool.
>>
>>34470486
That's called stealing the car anon.
>>
>>34468278

They both work great in DOSBOX.

>>34468323

The books are the in-game books. Usually a couple of pages, and they're awesome.
>>
>>34470452
>implying you wouldn't Iraq
>>
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> TFW I'm okay looking but short
> Have a thing for tall girls
> Orc girls are probably at least around 6'6" commonly
> I will never be pinned down and have my dick rode by a horny orc gal
Why /tg/, why was I born to feel
>>
>>34461223
Isn't that almost postmenopausal for orcs?
>>
>>34470680
This begs the question, what would the average orc girl height be /tg/?
>>
>>34470680
Man at least you can get tall girls.
I'm 6'2" and want a girl taller than me. Dagnabbit I want to be the little spoon after snusnu!
>>
>>34470840
Average orc man is like 6'4"

Average orc woman will be ~5'10"
>>
>>34460907

>implying any of you fa/tg/uys are not wizards.
>>
>>34470891
OP asked "would we", not "could we."
>>
>>34470857
Well I believe I'm in a range of 5'6"-5'8" and I dated a girl that was 5'11" and another that was 6'2". Both of them liked being dominated but sometimes they'd take control and damn man, good times.
>>
>>34463091

The Dwarves are not crappy fighters. Thorins company were a bunch of nobodies and coal miners who happened to be friends with an Orphan who had some distant claim on a throne currently being used as a pillow by a giant Dragon.

The Dwarven Army that shows up for the Battle of Five Armies isn't considered a great threat because, while individually experienced in combat, the Dwarves had only fought Goblins in confined tunnels, and had no idea how war on the surface worked. They reveal this by putting their slow and unwieldy army composed entirely of Heavy Infantry in a position where they can be easily out-maneuvered, which several Elves and Humans remark on.
>>
>>34461837

They are. And they're called Orcs.
>>
>>34471083
>The Dwarven Army that shows up for the Battle of Five Armies isn't considered a great threat because, while individually experienced in combat,
>the Dwarves had only fought Goblins in confined tunnels, and had no idea how war on the surface worked.
>They reveal this by putting their slow and unwieldy army composed entirely of Heavy Infantry in a position where they can be easily out-maneuvered, which several Elves and Humans remark on.

>tfw the films likely won't mention this
>>
>>34461862
>A metric fuckton. Check loverslab for the Sexlab framework. Thank me later.

Dat giant-on-breton action
>>
>>34471148

Didn't you hear? The film has a teaser trailer showing a light, agile Dwarven horde with some kind of retarded giant animal they're using for Calvary instead of grim, disciplined formations of heavily armored infantry.

Because Peter Jackson gives no fucks at all.
>>
Orc women don't shave.

so I definitely would
>>
>>34470680
>> Orc girls are probably at least around 6'6" commonly
Orcs aren't exceptionally tall.
They're short, but wide.
>>
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>>34467175
its all good man
>>
>>34472736
>>34472446
>your headcanon is wrong
>my headcanon is just
Whatever you say guys.
>>
>>34472829
It's not headcanon, it's the usual fluff. Orcs are not exceptionally tall, in some settings they're even shorter than people
>>
>>34473595
>usual fluff
>usual
>fluff
>some settings
I'm sure you see the problem here?
In D&D they are bigger; In TES they are bigger: Ergo, yeah.
>>
>>34473759
They are not exceptionally so. In D&D even the males don't come much taller than 6'3", in TES nords and high elves are taller than orsimer. 6'6" is tall as fuck for an orc. You overestimated
>>
>>34473861
>you overestimated
Not even that guy, anon-kun
Just pointing out that
>assumptions
Are always a shitty thing to make when we're talking about something that exists in nearly every fantasy setting.
>>
>>34461818

All that and a Paladin to boot.
>>
>>34465516
See >>34461862 Posted the mods and such I used there. As for a more specific guide? Well, eh. The only real thing you need to think about is making the face look symmetrical, since good symmetry is what makes a face attractive. And Raceplus is useful for removing those ridges Orsimer have if you don't like them by allowing you to change to another races complexion, which I did with my orc. Also, only keep Raceplus esp ticked when you're using it for your character creation, since it mucks around with a lot of presets a lot of people can suddenly start looking wierd.
>>
>>34462504
What are you, a bard?
Thread replies: 312
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