Metropolitan Quest #1:

First off, crumple up the flier and throw it away. It's a job for somebody who actually has skills; that's clearly not us.

Let's go take a walk and see if we can find a job at the local Starbucks. Maybe they need a night janitor.

>>32712932
Example Free-Form skill

>>32712932
Skills, huh? How about tracking? We can be outdoors-y.

>>32712932

We're fluent in Spanish. Not enough that you'd be confused for a native speaker, but you can hold a conversation with one.

>>32712974
A skill may be as broad to cover a field of expertise, but shouldn't be usable out of a specific area.
Example: Close combat, which is about as broad as it should get. However, it can be increasingly specific, such as sword fighting or fencing.

>>32713033

>>32712997
>>32712988

Maybe even athletic practitioner of parkour

>>32712932
Requirements must be met.
Basic Firearms
Basic CQC

>>32713093
Here's my list:

Basic Firearms: Specialty Pistol
Basic CQC:
Advanced CQC Specialty Boxing, Specialty Parkour
Investigation:

>>32712932

How about stuff that'd be generally useful, but less outlandishly tailored to killing people.

We're generally athletic. We've run in marathons before.

>>32712997
Luckily, those four years of Spanish class actually retained something in you. However, it has been awhile since you've had to speak it... Seeing as that is likely the least spoken language around where you live. In any case, it's not bad to have.
>>32712988
You were banned from the scouts at a young age for reasons which are yours and purely your own. It wasn't vandalism, and it had nothing to do with a musical instrument, but that is as far as you'll let the details slip. Still, you know how to tie knots, some basic animal prints, and... how to start a fire? You've started a fire once before, although you're pretty sure that will also be the last time. It may or may not have to do with you being banned.
>>32713093
Hmm... Well, you climbed trees when you were little. And hopped fences. And on more than one occasion had to climb out a window, or slide down a fire-escape, or jump from one rooftop to another.
Despite your Ramen noodle diet, you're an Olympian! An unemployed one, at that. But that will change today! Probably.
>>32713098
Well, you took some basic self-defense classes when you were a youngin'... You learned how to round house kick and stuff, but this may just be you getting your memories confused with some more eccentric kung-fu films you've watched. As for firearms? Well, that is a skill all on it's own. You used to fire guns at your Uncle's range out in the boonies, but couldn't usually handle anything bigger than a low-caliber pistol.

This sounds like it's coming together nicely! You've got all your skills together, but what about a quality about yourself? Are you charismatic, strong, endearing... Who knows when this could come up when trying to kill a guy.

>>32713212
Athletics: Running
>>32713093
Athletics Parkour

Need weapon. Suggest pistol.

Might help if we had some background.
Where were we born.
Who were are parents.
What are our hobbies.
Where did we go to school.
What was our job.
What is the reason for this 5 year slump.

>>32713321
Terrifying

>>32713321
Charismatic

File: bubble-bubbles-hardcore-powerpuff-girls-Favim.com-116950_large.jpg (211KB, 500x510px) Image search: [Google]

211KB, 500x510px

>>32713379

>>32713374
>Where were we born?
We know this, we were born in The Land of the Successor, driving distance from the ocean.
>Who were our parents?
They were people; anything else would be shocking.
>What are our hobbies?
Well you read a lot, there are books stacked in your room that you haven't even gotten to yet. You used to watch movies more often.
>Where did we go to school?
We went to Herbert-Doyle Highschool, back home.
>What was our job?
We used to clean tables at a shitty restaurant called Aqua Mexico
>What is the reason for this 5 year slump?
We just haven't been feeling well... Like, at some point, sometime, somebody told us we couldn't dream. And we believed them.
>>32713416
You can be a little bit of a charmer, you suppose... You've talked your way out of a ticket when you drove a car. Once.

This is what our resume looks like thus far:

Name: Morgan
Concept: Unemployed
Quality: Charismatic
Skills: Outdoorsy, Spanish, Parkour, Self-Defense, and Firing Pistols
Aspects:
Combat 1 Defense 5HP
Social 1 Defense 5HP
Majyyk 1 Defense 5HP

That's the long and short of it! Now, what do you do...

>Go straight to the offices without much forethought and save yourself some initial anxiety

>Prepare greatly but lose peace of mind overthinking your upcoming ‘audition’

>Other?

>>32713621
>Other
Prepare moderately.
Shit, Shower, Shave, Haircut
Arrive in a clean set of cargo pants, boots, and a polo.
Tough clothes easy to clean. Last a long time. A good investment

>>32713698
Second this

>>32713621
>Go straight to the offices without much forethought and save yourself some initial anxiety

Go big or go home fellas

>>32713698
>>32713715
You rediscover your face underneath all the rough scruff and cut your own hair, with varying success. With your clean clothes and a pair of boots you suspected you'd never use for an interview. You look like you belong on the back of a catalogue. For the first time in a long time, you feel pretty clean and prepared for life.

Question, though: how are we going to get there? The directions of the flier read that it's about eight blocks from where you're at. Are we going to...

>Jog
>Take a cab
>Casually walk
>Other?

>>32713902

What's the weather like? I'd suggest casually walking unless it's either really hot or really cold. Otherwise, take the bus, if possible.

>>32713902
Walk, we got legs use 'em, but there's no rush, and we wanna look presentable when we get there.

>>32713934
It's actually pretty fucking hot outside, you slowly begin to realize.

>>32713937
>>32713934
You decide, against your better judgement, that you'll casually walk there. You want to look cool, presentable: business like. Taking the bus or a cab would mean using up the last of your precious spending money. You walk, albeit a little uncomfortably.

You notice that your neighbor is also walking. No, she's jogging: you've never actually seen her outside the complex and she's defiantly never seen you outside of that hole. As you catch up, she slows down some to look at you, almost not recognizing initially.

"Morgan? Is that you?" she says, a little bit of breathing in her voice as she slows down.

>>32714037

"Hi.... you"

>>32714043
Hello. Out for a jog I see.

>>32714043
"Alison. The name is Alison," She smiles some despite how dumb you sound "Listen, whenever you forget somebody's name just ask them. And when they tell you their name, say 'no, no, your last name'. Then you save yourself, and you know their full name!"
Dammit, you're usually more charismatic than this!
She continues walking with you, occasionally glancing at your attire.
"So, what are you up to? Must be awful special if it means getting dressed."

>>32714138
"Let's say an job opportunity has presented itself."

>>32714176
She raises an eyebrow and smirks at you some
"Lets say, huh? Well, we can say a lot of things Morgan, whether or not they're true is up in the air. So, lets say you actually get hired; does that mean I won't see you around as often? What kind of job is it?" She seems legitimately interested and not just humoring you, unlike how it usually seems.

>>32714268
"It's a human resources firm of sorts. I should be doing some freelance contract work, assuming things go well today."

>>32714268
I'm not going to lie its on the dangerous side of things.

>>32714309
"That's oddly specific, but you know what, good on ya! It sounds like the kind of thing that would have a lot of hours go by though... Hmm, say, when you get back to your place and you actually GOT this job, come see me. I might have something that can help you. I know you're strapped for cash at the moment." She begins to, suddenly, turn a corner and jog away "Got to go now! Bye!" She waves a bit as she leaves.

The Wet Works offices can be seen just ahead, surrounded by pavement and waves of heat. You notice now that you have a bit of sweat beneath the pits of your shirt, but you say screw it. The heat of the summer cooks anything in it's view, especially the street. But it's city street, so there's probably a frozen yogurt place nearby.

>>32714424
Are we wearing a dark polo.
Did we remember to put on deodorant.
If both of these are done then this is no problem.

>>32714500
Neither of these things were done.
You're wearing a light green polo and deodorant? You don't own a stick. Should you make a list of things to acquire once you get some reasonable spending money? You get closer and closer towards the offices, until you're right at the front door. This may just be the point of no return...

Is there anything we need to do before entering?

>>32714569
Pray for luck internally.

>>32714759
You pray, but know that not even god can help you now.

Neatly stenciled on the pebble-glass door is "Wet Works Inc.". You step through the sealed doors of the simple, one-story building and examine the place. Everything seems white and clean, in that very office-y kind of way. There is a secretary at a desk, who is probably playing solitaire on her computer. Everything seems very sanitary, almost unnaturally so, to the point where the air smells funny. However, this may just be the fact that you're not so used to being in such disinfected places. Your apartment is clean, sure, but you wouldn't preform a surgery in there. It's like a god damned Apple store in here.

The secretary looks up, then back down, then back up again, noticing the paper in your hand. She speaks up
"Excuse me, sir, are you hear to see Marshall about the job?" Her manner of speaking is as odd as the building she occupies.
"He'll be waiting, in the back. I think you're the first to come by today with one of those fliers. He'll be happy." She motions towards a door down a long hallway with a dim-light coming out of it, with words in all-capitals spelled on it

"MARSHALL, OWNER AND PROPRIETOR OF WET WORKS."

It's a little intimidating... What, do you just GO for it? The florescent lights aren't very inviting, and the length of the hallway looks like it's just itching for a boulder to come tumbling down it. Maybe just talk to the secretary a little more...? You're always more comfortable talking to women. Maybe not able to relate to them as much, but easier to talk to.

>>32715025
Go for it. The sooner we get this over with the better I say

>>32715025
Besides the job on the flier what else does Wet Works do?

>>32715232
As far as you know, Wet Works seems to be oriented in looking professional. You didn't look too far into it. Maybe ask somebody there?
>>32715080
You step down the daunting hallway, the steps echo and rattle in your skull like beans in a fucking maraca. You suppose if you want to really keep at this job, then you'll just have to get used to hearing your heavy ass boots going through the hallway.

The lights overhead buzz a little as you get closer, and when you get to the door it's still that generic white glow with the words on the glass; you can't make out any figures, objects, nothing inside. You open the door and step in, quietly...

Inside is a very neat little room. Despite the cold, boring exterior, the inside was warm, almost inviting. There's a nice refurbished wooden desk with papers at it and a newton's cradle, along with other knick-knacks. There's a filing cabinet, what looks like a classical painting, and a pretty comfy chairs on both sides of the desk, though the one behind it was bigger and had more support. Of course, the last thing you notice is the actual employer... Who's name-plaque reads "MARSHALL", and nothing else.

He says nothing as he puts away some papers while you sit down. He eventually rests his elbows on the desk and looks forward at you, straight into your eyes, a piercing glance. He smells like carpeting, steak sauce, and scotch tape.

"Howdy. The name is Marshall, and I'll be your boss. There anything you needed ta ask before we being the interviewing process?'

>>32715297
Greet him, Tell him our name.

Rolled 2

>>32715297
None that I can think of, no

>>32715442
"Well good, we can get straight too it. There'll be two parts, I'll start with the first part: the interview." He pulls out a paper from his desk and coughs into his hand as he's about to read it.
"Question number one: Are you willing to kill people and be paid for it?"
He looks like he's just looking for a simple yes or no answer, leaning back a bit in his chair.

>>32715624
Yes.

Rolled 13

>>32715624
Yes.
It's what we came for.

>>32715624
"Good! The interview part of all this is over; yer essentially hired. But now here comes the second part... Convince me. I want you to convince me why I should maybe trust you with some higher-paying bounties, maybe with some tougher people. If you've got the moxie enough for me to give you a bonus to your initial pay then, well, I might just start likin' ya. So, tell me; Why are you better than the other Toms, Dicks, and Harries I've been hiring this week?"

Gracious! This looks like it's a test of sorts to discern the thick of your character! This is a form of social combat, where he's being kind enough to allow you to speak first. Lets think of something good today...

Well, we're charismatic, so that should help us convince him... We also know self defense, but that's not really good enough; that's just for protecting yourself, not outright going after someone. You're good with pistols and charismatic... Not so sure if any other of your skills will help you out.

So, those two skills will give us three d6 to roll to see if we can convince him. Roll 3d6, and choose the highest result. If you get a six and then another six, then it'll just be +1. Lets do it!

Rolled 5, 5, 1 = 11

>>32715827

Rolled 4, 1, 1 = 6

>>32715827
These day you can't always go in guns blazing. I talk the talk, set them up, and take them down.
If Wet Works teaches how to go in guns blazing I'd sign up though.

Rolled 6

>>32715912
>>32715863
You stutter a little, but otherwise make a good point. His attitude seems to dismiss some of it, however, which might be because he's a little drunk... The tumbler glass on his desk looks like it's filled half with A1 and other half with cheap beer. It's now his turn to retaliate! He's a little drunk, though, so he only rolls 1d6.
"You'd sign up if we were testing sex toys in here, boy. I know plenty of silver tongues... Just because you're unique, doesn't mean you're useful."

>>32716035
Marshall rolled well, even being able to get past your social defense. Not only does Marshall shut you up, but he shuts you up good. He kind of chuckles, though, still a little silly because he's been drinking. He adjusts himself in his seat, sitting up more, still speaking with a psuedo-southern drawl.
"Do you have a weapon?"

>>32716066
(Do we? Anyway its probably back at the apartment. And it was mentioned we shoot small caliber weapons.)
Other than my fist, my guns back at the apartment.

>>32716159
Pretty sure we do... Birthday present from our uncle.
He reaches in his desk and puts down about $250, neatly together, in front of you.
"Here's that initial pay I talked about. Just, please, try and get something nice... You smell worse than me. Also, you'll be needing your first client; you ready?"

>>32716228
Ready.

"Right, so..." he flips through a file he pulled from seemingly nowhere
"Lucy, Lucy North. She's just some whiny bitch who's been praying on some innocents in Mulberry park, you know, old people and run-off pets. Sucking their blood, or whatever. She's held up under a bridge in a part of the park nobody goes to anymore, because it's bein' held up by some kinda vampire cult or something... Now, listen, I don't think I need to tell you this but I'll say it anyway; bring back something as proof that you got her. It can be a finger, it can be an eyeball, it can be her fucking tampon for all I care if she hasn't used it for a teabag yet. Anything that is unique enough that I can show a client as proof. Now, go, I'll have a job for you by the time you get back. If you get back."

You step down the hallway and out of the building, back into the frying day, the sun like a keyhole view of hell. You're about 250 dollars richer now. What is it you exactly want to do? How do you prepare for Lucy North? If at all.

>>32716512
Wait so what do we know about vampires?
They burn in the sun?
Steak through the heart?
Can we not wifu her?

>>32716512
Vampire Cult.
Lucy North is sucking blood.
Use her own belief against her. Rosaries, crosses, garlic.
Also buy some deodorant.
If we're going stealth then switch shoes

>>32716589
Your scientific knowledge of vampires goes as far as 'they don't like the sun or garlic bread'.

>>32716651
Hmm... That's a good idea. But, wait, if we're going stealth do we have to wait until the night? Isn't that a little advantageous for the cult? Maybe you should, like, Google some stuff or go to the library. Or infiltrate them. You don't fucking know.

Can we just go buy some deodorant? Wait, lets make a list, in order of importance;

1. Deodorant
2. Vampire McFuck-em-ups stuff
3. Shoes (??)

What are we missing?

capatcha: roll lairblood

>>32716651
Or, Or, OR
We could just shoot her
Yeah since thats kinda what we are paid to do
Not spook goth chicks

>>32716815
Is she a real vampire and are vampires real in this universe?
Lets go to a resteraunt and steal some garlic bread buy some deodorant
and steak out the place a little bit or google vampires if they are real
Also we should buy a ski mask or somthing

>>32716819
Yes yes you like that plan.

>>32716866
You're... Preeeetty sure they're real? I mean, last time you checked. You think you had a friend who's cousin was a vampire. Or were they ginger?

You can find some garlic bread pretty easily in the back of an alley of this one place, just have to beware those homeless people... Don't ask yourself how you know this.

Alright, going to just go to that area of the park and do some recon... And then go home and Google some stuff, including 'are vampires real?'. And a skimask would be cool, yes.

You go to the nearest sporting good store store, which is only like ten bucks which you think is a rip-off but don't care. Anything else to do before heading towards to park? You kinda have to wait until night for there to be any garlic bread in the dumpster.

>>32716969
Yeah lets load our gun and look for anything else that could help us like kitchen knives maybe make a steak or two out of any wood we may have or visit home depo

>>32717200
Maybe we could siphon someones gas and make a molotov cocktail

>>32716969
I don't think we should wait until night when we're going to kill what might be a vampire. On the other hand, is what we're doing sanctioned by police or something? It's weird to see killers for hire be advertised for so openly.

>>32717200
Back home, you've really only got your zipgun with five bullets...
It's single-shot, but you don't need a clip. Plus, if someone was savvy enough with guns or something, they could probably change the kind of bullets it can take. You have one good kitchen knife, and you'd rather not use it on a vampire. And you've got something that was the end of a bed-post... Hey, wait, wasn't there something you were supposed to do?
>>32717221
That sounds incredible but you have no idea how to do that. What are you, a chemist?
>>32717227
You're pretty sure it's sanctioned by the law... You decide to use your hot neighbor's wi-fi to Google about Wet Works and vampires, learning that not only is Wet Works a legitimate business but also that business for them is booming.
Oh and vampires are real or something.

Okay, hold on, there is defiantly something you're forgetting.

>>32717322
If it's legit, fuck waiting until nighttime for garlic bread. Walk out under the sun and shoot her while she lurks under the bridge.

>>32717322
Wait, shit, there's also vampire cultists where she is. Fuck.

>>32717322
>needing to be a chemist to make a Molotov cocktail
Dude i did that once when i was 14 and drunk nevermind why or what happened but the eyebrows thing is a myth we could always google it though
are we forgetting deodorant?

>>32717322
You stupid gits clean yourselves up and go see your neighbor!
Well wat are ya waiting fa?! Git to it fore I Krump ya!

>>32717373
If were fine with killing people we could be fine with other stuff like stealing a car at gunpoint with the help of our trusty skimask and running some vampire cultists over maybe?

>>32717383
Oh yeah go shower and meet your neighbor!

>>32717357
Shit, gotta hurry! Only three hours of daylight left!
>>32717373
Oh shit that's right!
>>32717376
Wait, do you have multiple voices in your head? And shit, yes, you can Google it.... Hmm... Well, you already have a bad history with fire... Maybe just learn later? And shit, you're right, deodorant!
>>32717383
OH SHIT THAT'S RIGHT
>>32717390
These ideas keep getting weirder and weirder... We're not killing for fun, dammit! We're doing it for money! I guess we could steal a car but that is probably actually illegal.
>>32717402
But we need deodorant first!

Okay, so, what do we do;

>run to retrieve deodorant and burn some time which can possibly be used advantageously against vampires

>Forget the deodorant and just shower and shine, see your neighbor, then use the last hours of sunlight to fuck some vampires up.

>>32717510

>Forget the deodorant and just shower and shine, see your neighbor, then use the last hours of sunlight to fuck some vampires up.

>>32717510
Fuck it we can kill the vampires with our pitstank
Option 2 go

>>32717510
>Forget the deodorant and just shower and shine, see your neighbor, then use the last hours of sunlight to fuck some vampires up.
We're going to slather ourself in later anyway

>>32717546
Shit Should be
>We're going to slather ourselves in garlic later anyways

>>32717546
Wait do we have time to BUY some garlic bread on the way there i know this may be pushing it but it would be funny to forcefeed A dying vampire garlic bread

>>32717562
Actually it would be better put to use allover our body yeah lets do that instead

>>32717566
Why garlic bread? Why not just garlic?

>>32717510
Guys, are we really going to assault a vampire on so little preparation?

>>32717614
>>32717566
You know we can just buy some garlic powder. They sell that shit. Good for sprinkling vampires.

>>32717632
She preys on old people and stray pets, and is still sloppy enough to get caught doing it. I doubt she has much experience. I'm much more worried about the cultists. Why don't we take a day or three and see if there's a time they're not around. I'm pretty sure it didn't have to be done today.

>>32717680
We need like wood stakes or a book of pickup lines or something. Do "holy books" work? Maybe with a wood binding, that can count for three things. Efficiency.

>>32717660
>find where she hangs out
>walk up to her alone
>shoot her in the back of the head
>cut off her ear and stuff garlic bread in her mouth
Mission complete!

>>32717527
>>32717542
>>32717546
Alrighty! But you have to promise yourself to buy deodorant. Probably, like, gives you a bonus or just makes you smell less. You take a shower and allow the lukewarm water to wash over you and let a pure stream of consciousness envelope your head... You listen to your unabridged thoughts presenting themselves...

>>32717562
>>32717591
>>32717709
Um... Okay. Okay not the worst thought you've ever had, keep it noted.

>>32717566
Oh dude that's metal.

>>32717614
>>32717660
Because maybe you want something to eat after, Admiral Asshat. Not going to waste all the garlic bread on the bitch.

>>32717632
We'll be fine! We'll wing it, like every English paper we ever did for Mr.DiLucchio's class. Speaking of, he might have also been a vampire.

>>32717680
True, but why not just get it out of the way? The cultists can't be that bad if they have an amateur like that in their ranks.

After the shower, you get dressed and decide to leave your gun and stuff under your mattress. You can come back for it, plus probably wouldn't be very impressive to Alison anyway. You knock on her door and she unlocks it, opening it and smiling some, adjusting her glasses.

"Hey Morgan, so did you actually get hired or am I going to have to deny you entrance?"

You've never actually seen the inside of her apartment, you don't know what to expect. Contrary to popular belief you are NOT a peeping tom. You can smell food inside, though... Oh my god, actual food... Not just pre-package freeze-dried crap...

>>32717759
I'm pretty sure that we're essentially hired. Does she know about vampires?

>>32717759
Tell her you did and are starting today
Then lean on her door and look at her seductively

>>32717830
First part good, let's hold it on seduction

>>32717862
Atleast ask wazup

>>32717862
Let's NOT hold on the seduction. Warm smiles go a long way. Into her body.

>>32717892
I'm okay with this

>>32717822
>>32717830
>>32717862
>>32717879
You tell her that you were, in fact, hired and ask her what is up. It occurs to you to lean seductively but it's mixed signals, so you just kind of half-lean and balance on one leg like an idiot. You give an earnest warm smile. She rolls her eyes and smirks, opening the door for you.

"Come on in, you goonie."

You step inside to see that her apartment is actually very clean... Sure, some stuff here and there is out of place, but it's unbelievably inviting. Did she clean just for you? Holy shit that's sweet. She's also got some food made.

"There's enough for two, if you want some. Plates are in the cabinet."

And among the food there is some Texas Toast garlic bread. Is this how you bring up vampires? Maybe she knows a thing or two. She's smart she went to community college.

>>32717977
Good things come to those who wait... Maybe ask her out on a date, sometime?

>>32717892
>Warm Smiles
Bitches love warm smiles

>>32718016
Stuff some garlic bread on our pockets not the left one though thats where we keep our emergency spaghetti

>>32718016
Just ask if she believes in vampires. You hear some shit and wanted a second opinion. And maybe ask her to forcibly raise our Int stat, shit.

>>32718065
Don't think with the beta mentality lest you BECOME THE BETA
You put a loaf in your pants while making your plate. You just kind of stand up and eat, only for her to to tell you after two minutes that you can sit down besides her on her couch. This is actually pretty good.
>>32718138
When the subject of vampires is brought up, she scratches her head some until she can think up a response.
"Well, knew a couple of kids who were vampires in high school. They just kinda kept to themselves and drank coffee at the Dennys at night. If you want to know what I think of them, I don't know what to tell you. As long as they don't bother me, I'm fine."
She nudges you some
"So, what do you do exactly? Not your job, but hobby-wise. At least try to make some small talk with me, dude. I'm feeding you, after all." she laughs some.

>>32718256
Olympic martial artist, with a bent to theatrical-style kung fu, the passing over of obstacles, and entertaining children.
>>32713321

>>32718256
Tell her you like trains
Then say your just kidding you like to do parkour stay fit and talk to cute girls with glasses

>>32718307
>>32718314
Oh yeah, and we display some olympic zen dexterity yoga shit to her like we're in the Cirque du Soleil.

>>32718360
Not in her house we'll knock shit over and look like a retard
Also OP i'm really liking this setting and your writing

>>32718307
>>32718314
>>32718360
"Wow, you sound really athletic... But you've got the tensile strength of a rice-cracker, look at you. I could play the xylophone on your ribs, man. Also theatrical-style kung fu is a good excuse for making it look like you know what you're doing."
When the comment about cute girls in glasses and entertaining children comes up, she pauses, and looks at you
"Is that supposed to win me over?"
It looks like there may be social combat coming up soon on the horizon: brace for impact. Last time was with your drunk boss, but now is an actual effort!
Thank you very much. :)
Steak sauce mixed with cheap beer is a magic potion that turns you into a puppet cowboy before it kills you.

>>32718466
We must use that metaknowlage and make a potion and trick our vampire target into drinking it

Rolled 4, 6, 3 = 13

>>32718466
"That depends. Did it?"

>>32718532
This

Rolled 6, 1, 6 = 13

>>32718532
"Damn, you're flirting with me, aren't you? Well, I'm not going to say it isn't working, but still... Usually you just kind of murmur to yourself and only say 'hi' to me, why the change?"

Ouch.

She's talkative, so she has her share of dice to roll.

Morgan only has charismatic and his default one die to roll on this one, but I'll count that roll. Unless you want to throw some Spanish in there.

Rolled 6, 5, 1 = 12

>>32718716
Not only does that hurt but it's also pretty damn true.

You've only really had passing conversation before. She mistook you for a homeless person the first time she saw you.

>>32718768
Getting back into the swing of things.

>>32718768
didn't mean to roll on that one, whoops

>>32718794
Lets just go with this

Tell her you woke up this morning and felt like turning your life around or somthing just as cheesy
>>32718768

>>32718768
Apparently the silent moody type isn't attractive

>>32718794
>>32718841
The conversation continues, a little awkwardly. The air is so thick with silence you could heat it up and drizzle it on pancakes. You get some food in your system and put your dish in her sink.

>>32718901
You decide to tell her the events of this morning, and she looks at you a little strange
"Well, why all of a sudden?"

>>32718934
Not to her, anyway.

>>32718944
Tell her because you were done being unhappy eating ramen and the silent moody type isn't attractive

>>32719019
"Well, I can see why. And you're right, it's not attractive at all."

You begin getting up and thinking about leaving... It's still a little awkward. You can't help but notice how cute she is in her comfy indoor clothes.

Fuck the sun is going down... You'll have to be going out, soon.

>>32718944
Tell her you saw the job as a new chance. Shaving the beard made you see your old self. Just getting ready for this gave you something you can't really describe. You're just hopping that it stays that way long enough to get some stable footing in life.

>>32718944
By the glory of steak sauce, we were supposed to demonstrate our kung fu, not just talk about it. And did she imply our strength was low? Does she even lift? Ask her if she lifts. Then KUNG FU the place.

>>32719109
Tell her your already a little late for your new job but you'd like to hang out again and jokingly say and get free food

>>32719131
no pls

>>32719174
Immediately switch to amoral ice cold killer. "I was just using you for food. I wanted to use you for sex, too. I think you would enjoy it. Good bye."

>>32719116
"That's incredible! I'm glad you're moving up in the world."
>>32719131
>>32719174
The thought occurs to you, but before you can say anything she speaks.
"Well... I can see you've got places to be right now. Come over anytime you want to have an actual meal, okay? And, hey, you maybe want to start jogging with me in the mornings? Could be fun." Her voice is very warm when she gives you this offer, almost uncharacteristically so.

>>32719209
You pray she's not a telepath.

>>32719223
>but before you can say anything
What kind of a socially inept theatrical kung fu artist are we? Do. The. Physical. Actions. No speech, just kung fu.

>>32719223
Sounds like a good idea. What time.

>>32719299
"I'll just knock on your door when I'm ready... I usually get ready about 6:30, 7:00... But I can wait, if you need me to."

>>32719350
Put it off until the next day, then say whenever she's ready. We've got vampire shit tonight.

>>32719376
Good idea! She nods in agreement when you tell her you have other engagements that day, and you get up, go back to your apartment, retrieve your gear, and leave.

One hour of sunlight left.

>>32719376
Grab your gun skimask and knife rub that garlic bread on you carve a steak and get ready to "steak" the place out

>>32719455
Actually don't rub ourself down with bread just yet
Lets try and talk to our mark first lure her somewhere we can fucking book it after we pop her and cut off her ear
Also what caliber is our zip gun?

>>32719437
We actually managed to do something competently. Remember this. Live it. Also make sure we have the appropriate garlic. Maybe get a "holy symbol" or something. Try to remember that one good vampire film you say.

>>32719455
You're all decked out with your killin' equipment like some kind of Spy-Kid.
>>32719481
You've already rubbed it on the badly carved steak... Pretty sure it's garliced out in terms of rubbing it off on stuff. You don't know how you'll lure her out, what, with a laser pen? Like a cat? The zipgun is .22lr.
>>32719487
You've got a bible among your books... And you remember Nosferatu.
This doesn't help you at all.

You being walking out, all equipped, and head towards the dead area of the park. Beneath a stoney bridge you can make out little glowing embers, like fireflies. The shadows casted are twisted and gnarled, like something a nightmare pooped out.

Also turd in a church it's still hot out.

>>32719640
Initiate Protocol :
Tactical Espionage Action

>>32719674
>>32719640
Keep the shadows, act like out on a normal walk, observe for people.

>>32719674
>>32719689
You casually walk by the bridge, and observe.
The little embers are the ends of cigarettes, and to be honest it's just a bunch of dudes and one chick clad in leather underneath there. Looks like a reverse harem under there. Bunch of dried out bodies, too.

Oh shit they see you, probably shouldn't have worn heavy boots.

Oh shit you're still wearing the ski-mask...

>>32719773
Just act normal. Honestly nothing wrong with wearing a ski mask. They'll probably find it cool.

>>32719773
QUCKLY ask for directions to the bank

>>32719806
That would be true if it weren't blazing outside.
>>32719817
"Hey, you guys know where the nearest bank is?"
They scoff you off, ignoring you.

>>32719831
Would shooting the girl in the head once kill her?
Maybe we should go steal a car and run them all over and get the fuck out

>>32719855
Wander off and find a decent place to hide maybe?

>>32719855
Probably. Also, that would be unjust and illegal. Plus, she could probably dodge.
>>32719868
You decide to hide in some shrubbery like a legitimate homeless person. They don't really... Move. They just keep smoking, hanging out, they look like they just ate.

Rolled 3

>>32719901
Walk up to them grab the crotch of your pants and say there's a party in my pants *shoot her in the head* and your not invited then fucking run and parkour while reloading

Rolled 6, 2, 5 = 13

>>32719925
another for the parkour reloading and shooting skill forgot those

>>32719925

This. Fuck it.

>>32719901
Ski masks are quite valid even in hot weather. There are indoor skate parks, and other legitimate non-murder reasons to wear them, like facial protection from vampires. We can just ask to join the vampire cult, you know. Or learn chemistry.

>>32719942
You do the stupidest thing you think you've ever done and it works.
Not only are you about to shoot her, but her other buddies can't get too close to you without beginning to melt! Haha, garlic bitch!
Oh shit but how to you get up to her and take an ear or whatever?
>>32720008
Gotta get priorities in order. Right after this, and I mean RIGHT after this, deodorant and running-shoes. And maybe something special, like a treat, dunno what yet.
Oh and collect the bounty.

>>32720074
Don't we just shoot her? I mean, just shoot her. Then we take an ear with some sharp, like the knife we definitely have, any gun sharp bits, or our bare hands.

Rolled 1, 2, 2 = 5

>>32720074
Shoot the other guy's too fuck it they can't touch you just pop them till they drop and throw some garlic bread at the bodies for good measure

>>32720118
We shot her, she is down, but now we have to run over and try and rip her ear off with our bear hands...
>>32720149
You keep missing, we gotta slow down mother mochocho because we've only got one bullet left.
Add that to the list; ammunition

>>32720170
try and pop the last guy then throw garlic bread at the other and ask him if he wants to fucking die today and why didn't he just tell you where the god damn bank is

>>32720170
We have no sharp objects at all? Not even some glass, broken bottles on the ground, rocks? Soda cans? If not, we rip her ears off.

Rolled 1

>>32720200
fuck my roll messed up
>>32720213
We got a steak and a knfie

>>32720213
None whatsoever.
>>32720200
>>32720222
Not only do you miss but the garlic bread just falls out of your pocket while running. Also you stutter and mess up your line. Oh, and you don't have your knife on you because that's your one good knife you don't want to waste on vampire shit. The steak can... Kinda work, I guess.

Rolled 1

>>32720222
Fuck it we are desprate here shout at them to throw her dead ass over here right now in exchange for their lives and the lives of their extended family

Rolled 5

>>32720250
Jesus christ i'm done someone else roll and come up with idea's please
throw rocks and yell curse words

>>32720243
This is our JOB, boy. Use the knife. Let it taste blood for the first time, on REAL work.

Rolled 1

>>32720283
walk to the apartment and let them fuck off with her corpse?
Fuck that nigga we got a steak and no other options

>>32720250
Okay now they're grabbing at you. Tearing at your clothes, taking your shoes and shit. Also they threaten to eat anybody you love.

Y'know, they aren't as formal as the girl was. Maybe she was the only one keeping it together. Wonder where the whole cult is...

>>32720278
>>32720283
You stab at them and are able to take down most of them, but now you've got cuts all over your body.
>>32720304
They follow you to the apartment.

If this were a book, the chapter would begin with: "How did I get here?"

>>32720304
ps, i was not rolling to attack them with a steak just stating my opinion with the roll on oops

>>32720330
Alright. Forget the apartment comment, then.

>>32720327
Do we have a bat in our apartment if so batter the fuck up

>>32720327
Did we get the ears? Get the ears.

>>32720349
Lets try get close to her body and out of their reach and try and drag it out with you if one of them gets close or grabs you use all your force to throw them into the sun and steak them like a crazy man

>>32720349
How many are left and what kind of position are we in Also our HP? or rough estimate?

>>32720414
It's pretty much dark at this point.
You just go by the body and attempt tugging at the ear, hacking at it. Roll for it.
>>32720441
Two are left, and we are currently trying to pull a bitch's ear off. Our HP is low, damn low.

Murdering goth kids the game

Rolled 2

>>32720466

>>32720466
>>32720466
We should invest in a camera. And a real fucking gun. Solves most of the problems we have right now. Actually, can we snap a cell phone pic of the body quick and book it or something?

>>32720489
I love it.
>>32720491
You're pulling, but can't quite get it. Careful, you're covered in wounds, don't want any of that vampirism crap in there. Alison probably doesn't like vampires.

Rolled 5, 1 = 6

>>32720466
Rolling for earhack then twice for running and parkour
This is actually really funny op good job i'm going to take a shower be back soon

>>32720562
This... Is the most logical thing you've come up with all day. But all you've got is a shitty flip phone... And, yes, you need a real gun.
Put it on the list.

Rolled 4

>>32720587
God fucking damn i forgot the extra dice also fuck i suck at rolling

>>32720587
You get the ear off, finally!
But you're failing at parkour, probably due to all your wounds.

>>32720618
You still fail at the parkouring.
Also, thank you.

>>32720645
Just run. Fuck parkour. Just bolt and don't look back

Rolled 6

>>32720645
>>32720623
Are you sure we're failing at parkouring? How about just running?

>>32720778
>>32720780
You have never bolted faster in your life. You literally did a straight line from there to anywhere but there. You go so hurridly, you lose the vampires.

Only question, where to?

>>32720832
Wherever we finish the job at. Finish this shit quick.

>>32720848
>>32720832
That would be Wet Works. Marshall said he'd have a job when we got back. We go back. Remember the maracas echo.

>>32720832
See if Marshall is at his office

Rolled 1

>>32720848
We look like a lunatic
>skimask
>torn up clothes covored in cuts and blood that may not even be ours most of it is though
>holding a gun and a steak covered in garlic bread crumbs
fuck it to the house to try and clean and cover your cuts and survay the damage then get dressed again THEN maybe if were not dying go turn in the ear take a cab

Rolled 5

>>32720920
Rolling to override. We need to look the Wet Works part. Impress him.

>>32720848
>>32720911
>>32720914
You run into the Wet Works offices and down the long, stretched hall. You dirty the floor as young go down and when you reach the end, you just slam dunk the ear on his desk.

He looks unimpressed and he begins doing some filing, probably recording the bounty. He, almost bored in tone, asks you

"How much trouble was your first bounty?"
>>32720920
Probably should have thought of that... Would make you look like less of an idiot in front of your boss.

>>32720943
"A lot. But I learned. You said there was another?

>>32720943
"I enjoy this. It's exhilarating slaughtering vampire cultists with my favorite steak knife. Here's the proof. Where's my next job?"

Rolled 5

>>32720943
Tell him it was easy as pie you got hit by a car on the way over and attacked by birds since your covered in garlic bread crumbs

Rolled 1

>>32721000
This trips confirm

>>32721000
"Heh, whatever you say, jefe."
He pulls a paper out and scans it with hungover eyes, but not before giving pay of $400
"Lesse... How would you feel about killing a furry?"

Rolled 1

>>32721041
Sounds fun know where i can buy a flamethrower?

>>32721041
"You mean werewolf don't you. Why not? Also, do you carry ammo?"

>>32721041
Nothing on this Earth could possibly make me happier

>>32721064
>>32721060
"If you've got hairpray and a zippo, you've got a flamethrower. And yeah, werewolf, I guess. It's an anthrope if you wanna be more scientific. You'll be fine. And, no, I do not carry ammunition on me. I don't use guns myself..."
He cracks his knuckles
"They don't kill quick enough."

>>32721041
"Wait a fucking second. $400? I saw on the history channel that paid assassins get at least $10,000. And they don't have to deal with vampires."

Rolled 2

>>32721154
Ask him for a raise

>>32721142
"Excuse me sir, but that's a generalization. It is scientifically possible to make a weapon bearing the descriptor "gun" that kills very quickly, such as the prototype nuclear weapons of World War II."

Rolled 5

>>32721200
Don't be a tool lets just go to the apartment and rest and get ready for wearwolf killing

>>32721220
He's the one who wants to be scientific, and he left off the "lycan" part of "lycanthrope", a didn't even give a proper species binomial. He's shit. Note him down.

>>32721154
He rubs his temples and stands up from his desk and... Oh sweet jesus, the fucker is like, six foot six.
"Lissen here sunny... You pull that shit in Texas, and you get wind in yer head. Prove yourself, and I'll start paying you in the thousands range, then maybe after awhile you might make it there."

>>32721178
"You know what? After this job, I'll give you a raise. Oh I'll give you a fuckin' raise, you just wait. Just go put a bullet between the eyes of the fag with shit sticking to his fur, and I'll give you a case I've been saving for someone like you." He sits back down. The room feels like it shakes some.
"Now go on. Get some sleep. The furfag's gonna be at a bar called The Vulgar Unicorn sometime tomorrow night."

Rolled 2

>>32721254
Well maybe thats just the way he talks
Probably not many other furry anthropes that need assasinated out there

>>32721305
I'm watching him. From inside our head.

>>32721299
We go take a nap, buy some ammo tomorrow. Maybe ask him if they're vulnerable to silver and attracted to rabbits or something.

>>32721299
"Alright boss"
Go home and get cleaned up make sure Alison doesn't see us so be really fucking sneaky

Rolled 5

>>32721299
Say thanks cya boss and walk the fuck out go home and go to bed after we clean and dress our wounds
Also take the fucking ski mask off how has noone called the cops yet?

>>32721340
>Inb4 arrested at the ammo store.

>>32721331
>>32721339
>>32721340
You go home and you rest up, waking up the next day well rested but sore as shit all over. You honestly aren't used to the amount of money you have to spend... Okay, wait, what did our mental groccery list consist of again? Someone list it all out. All of it.

>>32721389
>Ammo
>Leather jacket
>silver cutlery
>several small mice for feeding snakes
>silver earrings, mouse size

>>32721389
Deodorant
Running shoes.
Camera
Ammo
Gun, preferably something with a bit of punch

Rolled 2

>>32721430
What the fuck we don't have a snake
ammo yes
leather jacket yes
deodorant
hairspray and lighter
garlic bread
a real gun
a stabbing knife preferably silver
money
food
that concludes the list in my mind probably forgot stuff

>>32721491
I'd settle for a bag of garden snakes wearing silver earrings. But they're probably more expensive than the mice.

You know actually, we should probably figure out if magic exists. Given all these 'supernatural' creatures. Get us on the right path to archmage good and proper.

>>32721525
What the fuck would we do with a bag of snakes?

>>32721430
>>32721482
>>32721491
We now have...
>MkIII Ruger and ammo to spare.
>Leather pilots jacket (and aviator shades; you like like you belong in a homoerotic volleyball montage)
>A silver knife which was way more expensive than it should have been
>Deodorant
>Running shoes
>A pretty sweet camera
All this along with food and rent leaves us with about... $250
Well at least we look neato.

Well shit, what to do now? Gotta wait until later when the furry shows up at the bar, or something.

>>32721577
Attach the silver earrings to them, rip the bad open on top of the werewolf, shoot him. Simple job.

Rolled 4

>>32721583
Think up gay pickup lines for him and drink a few beers

>>32721583
Pick up a spare mag or two for the pistol, load them up. A werewolf might be harder to take down than a vamp

>>32721583
We really needed more than a single silver knife. Like some throwing forks or something.

>>32721607
This seems pretty viable... I mean, you don't want a situation like last time. This could make it quick and, really, a whole lot easier. You can pretend you're gay, it's fine
>>32721643
Got two others, we're good.
>>32721656
Too expensive.

>>32721607
"I'm an alpha wolf, and you're the great gatsby, let's ro man ce."

Rolled 6

>>32721678
Okay so we have a general plan lets scout the area for anything we can use for our benifit or escape or aid is in our job or anything

>>32721678
"Prepare yourself, for Stargate Atlantis."

>>32721753
Yep, scout the area. Or learn chemistry or google werewolves, or google sorcery.

>>32721692
That's not good enough. We need to be really genuine! Maybe just buy him a few drinks, bring him to a hotel or whatever, and then off him there.
>>32721753
Before we leave and do that, maybe we can learn a little...
>>32721770
You decide to read up about furries, chemistry, and how to pick up cute girls with glasses. Well, at least one of those searching was helpful.

Rolled 2

>>32721770
I'm leaning twards chemistry but whats sorcery like? what do we think it does?

>>32721678
Do we have any friends that might be interested in/ suited for this line of work?

>>32721811
Probably not.

>>32721793
I'm glad the chemistry panned out. We'll move that right into alchemy, and then to sorcery. Enable: Wikipedia

>>32721798
>>32721832
You look deeper into chemistry and alchemy and sorcery... And learn shit.
>>32721811
What friends?

>>32721798
Honestly? Who knows. Supernatural creatures apparently do exist around these parts. That means all the other shit from cartoons probably does to. Therefore: Wizards. We can find out the easy way, or the magical realms hard way.

>>32721860
Well what do we learn then? I mean, we're us. Right here. Do we have some white dove rubedo rocks tree of life pictures to tell us the secret of everything?

>>32721910
>>32721868
We learn very little and basically just waste our time on the computer. Maybe we should head out and scout the bar... Do anything beforehand?

Rolled 2

Fuck it siphon some gas and make a Molotov hide it by the bar if something goes south thats a backup plan lets try and pick up the fagwolf and cut his throat in a motel room

>>32721860
>what friends?
I was afraid of an answer like that

>>32721953
You sound like you're lying to us. Erm, to yourself. We Know things now. (Probably the recipe for suicide powder.) Well we've got very little else to do but scouting, unless we can reinforce our jacket with STEEL?

>>32721973
We have Alison. She's probably going to die horribly, but at least she's currently 'friendly' and thus highlighted in green to our new internal HUD we've just gained. Right now.

>>32721993
That would be a little too time consuming. And no, you are not lying to yourself.
>>32721969
You just kind of make your kitchen smell like gas and you're too scared to go back in, so you must go to the bar.

The Vulgar Unicorn is a very boring bar without a lot of character. There is a stereotypical behind the bar, and there is a back entrance near there the bathrooms are, but everything else is boringly unnoteworthy.

>>32722029
We are in nightmarish need of getting laid. The last time was... Wasn't it prom? Probably.
Though you haven't really made any advanced until recently, you still know that Alison is locked up tighter than a Chinese puzzle box. But that's neither here nor there.

Rolled 4

>>32722099
Well if we don't get maimed horribly or raped after this lets go pick up chicks after this
Vampire chicks
Skimask optional

>>32722099
Have a few drinks with White Fang, flirt shamelessly, after he is good and drunk see ifhe wants a romp in the back alley. Let him lead the way, once outside, put two into the back of his head. Snap a few pictures, return to Marshall

Also.. is this actually a gay bar? Or are we just assuming?

>>32722099
Well just learn some summoning shit and magic ourself a girl. And, we're outside the bar, right? How long until our hot date?

Wonder if you got hit on the head when fighting the campires you're starting to get some really weird thoughts

Rolled 5

>>32722174
Its god damn obvious its a gay bar
lets call him bigby

>>32722150
>>32722174
Sounds like a plan.

You... Think it's a gay bar...? Thing is, there's never a sign that tells you if it is for sure or not. You are mostly certain it's a gay bay. Mostly.

Looks like we've got four hours until Fuzzy-Wuzzy arrives at the bar.

What are we going to do until then? I'm sure we'd love to get laid but that might be a bit of a challenge with a time-limit.

Rolled 4

>>32722239
Scope the place out and have a beer obtain a description of the inside and anyone of note

>>32722239
Meditate upon the remembered alchemical drawings. Feel the spirit of the hunting cougar within you. Taste the waning sunlight, and strengthen our root chakra. Tonight we dine on wolf, not crow.

>>32722239
Try and buy some drugs, maybe we can slip something in the fuzzball's drink. Some ghb or Molly are often readily available at dive bars/ gay bars.
Maybe some coke for ourselves.

Rolled 2

>>32722281
Wat
>>32722308
Lets go with this actually but be really discreet about it so we don't get thrown out

>>32722322
You know exactly wat. We're the sword of the rising sun. Slayer of beasts nefarious. It's only fitting.

>>32722308
Well, it's pretty empty right now, you'll have to wait when more people arrive...
Coke is cool, right? Chicks think it's cool when you do coke? Will Alison like it? probably not. You should stick to heroin.

>>32722322
No need to be too discrete, just walk up to any black guy and ask for drugs. It's like you have never gone to a metropolitan dive bar before..

Rolled 1

>>32722359
Nah with our job type lets stick to uppers but still look around for somthing to spike the wolfs drink with if we get desprate

Rolled 5

>>32722402
I just had to roll

>>32722359
We decline drugs! Don't do them kids! Kill werewolves instead maybe. Who knows? Maybe we should eat lunch or something.

File: 1392193672072.gif (2MB, 500x400px)

2MB, 500x400px

Rolled 6

>>32722451
If worst comes to worst
Were going to need them

>>32722507
We are far too much of a posh metropolitan to need anything but strawberries.

File: 1397974993344.png (529KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

529KB, 500x500px

Rolled 2

>>32722569

After an overwhelmingly meh lunch, you go to the bar four hours later.

It's more energetic during the night, but it's not overwhelming; there is catchy music and dudes enjoying themselves. Ahead, drinking alone, you see the target in question. In a darker corner of the bar, there is a creepy looking dude who is eating barnuts by the handful.

>>32722598
Go up to him and say "whats shakin and why its not us"

Rolled 6

>>32722597
Are you implying our penis will get half-eaten then turn into a homunculus?

>>32722598
Well, two options really. Shoot him. Seduce him.

Rolling to seduce.

Rolled 6, 5, 2, 4, 1, 4, 2, 4, 2, 5 = 35

>>32722598
Alone? Fuck it then. Pistol in one hand, knife in the other, magdump into chest/head, slit throat for good measure take a few pictures of the body and take off like a bat out of hell

Gonna roll 9d6 for each bullet? Yeah? Or if you want it all as one, just take the first one. Also a tenth d6for the throat slashing

>>32722651
You get his attention
"Hey there... Fuck me if I'm wrong, but is your name Easy Bottom?"
You smile at this, although on the inside you feel INCREDIBLY UNCOMFORTABLE

>>32722651
I thought it was implied i was implying that
>>32722651
Nice roll

Rolled 4

>>32722695
"I need you. You're gorgeous."

>>32722728
"Hey, there's a hole in the bathroom... Wanna go and...?"
Oh shit

Rolled 1

>>32722752
"Let's do this. I want to look into your eyes."

>>32722771
>>32722752
If it goes bad, we silver knife him instantly.

>>32722771
"No, I don't think you're speaking my language... I want some quick fun, I'm not looking for any hand-holding."

Rolled 4

>>32722819
"I can do that. Easily. Your favorite stall."

>>32722842
"Ever do it before, pup? You look a little nervous."
He puts an arm around us... Jesus, the guy is huge! He's like a bear! He's like a big shaved bear!

>>32722921
"Never with someone so strong."

>>32722940
He gets up, and drags us over to an unmarked room. He leaves us in there while he moves over towards the men's room.
Okay, shit, coming quicker than thought... What do? Cut his dick off with the knife? That's kind of too mean

Rolled 2

>>32722985
Are we alone? If we're alone, we use our silverknife deathstrike from behind.

Rolling to ninjadeathstrike. Failsafe: Hand on gun.

The only way to beat this wolf is to become HUGE!

>>32722985
Oh man ask him if thes into cock vore and stab him through the dick bust out of the stall and start poping him in the head and if he gets close enough stab and scream like a four year old who didn't get his happymeal toy
Or some other anon can suggest somthing

>>32723005
He notices the knife coming towards him and immediately dodges it.
"You lil' twit!"
Shit he's transforming.

>>32723059
I mean, we always could slice his penis off. It would make a pretty good souvenir and maybe alchemical ingredient.

Rolled 2

>>32723072
Now is the time for kung fu. Recover and knife strike two.

>>32723083
Ew dude we could turn his dick in as proof

>>32723072
Stab arm with knife. While he recoils, back up and plug him with the gun. CQC finish to the jugular.

>>32723072
JUMP AWAY PULL OUT YOUR PUSSY LITTLE 22 AND MAGDUMP HIS HEAD
Man i wish we had a Molotov

Rolled 5

>>32723072
"Yiff in Hell!"
Stab him again

>>32723113
You decide this sounds badass, and stab him in the arm!
It clearly hurts, but he's not recoiling or anything...
As you go for your gun he throws you out of the stall like a ragdoll

Rolled 2, 2, 6 = 10

Rolling to jump up and magdump his face and laugh like a retard

Rolled 1

>>32723135
Look man, you already understand. Stab him again. Keep up the good work for our new JOB.

>>32723165
You stab so badly you somehow end up stabbing yourself.
Oh shit did you get furry blood in you.
Oh fuck he's carrying you to the alleyway...

Rolled 4, 6, 3 = 13

>>32723135
Magdump, take dick from corpse later

For battle cry, refer to >>32723128

Rolled 6

>>32723135
>>32723159

That's it. Rolling to fade away dunk him with the knife.

Rolled 1, 6 = 7

>>32723201
SHOOT HIM IN THE GOD DAMN HEAD FUCK WHATS WRONG WITH MY IDEA?

>>32723212
That's a six on a dunk. We can do this.

Rolled 1

>>32723201

Fucking shoot him. Shoot him a lot. Until we can't any more. Like we should have in the first place.

>>32723244
This transformed werewolf son of a bitch takes an entire clip to his abdomen but seems pretty unaffected, despite some bleeding. In the alley, he begins forcefully undressing you.

Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, WHY DO YOU HAVE SUCH BAD LUCK

Rolled 1

>>32723266
WHY DID YOU USE MY ROLL? USE THE SIX. FUUUUUU

Rolled 5

>>32723266
You're, we're, doing it on purpose now. We just want sex. Rolling to empower our blade with lust.

>>32723244
>>32723266
I can't handle all these dubs just like our ass can't handle that werewolf pounding. It'll be a sticky situation

Rolled 3, 3 = 6

>>32723266
Why did you ignore the decent rolls and take his shitty roll after everyone else rolled?
How do you take rolls?

Rolled 3

>>32723292
You rolled a 1 first.

I, on the other hand, will strike him with a now lust empowered silver blade! >>32723295

Rolled 4

>>32723321
stab him with whatever we got we already got his aids anyways aslong as we don't take someones shitty 1

>>32723351
As I recall from our online reading, only werewolf bites transfer the curse, not blood. The blood shit is vampires. And she's dead.

>>32723295
The blade begins glowing, unnaturally so... The silver becomes even more noticeable, shining, even blinding.
>>32723351
You stab him with the empowered blade and he howls, yes literally howls, in agony.

Rolled 3

>>32723388
Carve a rune of death through his body. Rend him in TWAIN.

Rolled 6

>>32723388
SLIDE IT AROUND AND GORE HIS INSIDES WITH THE BLADE AS HARD AS YOU CAN MESS HIS INSIDES UP JUST LIKE HE WAS ABOUT TO DO TO YOU

File: 1390902161465.jpg (241KB, 2048x725px) Image search: [Google]

241KB, 2048x725px

>>32723439
YES, YES

>>32723439

Fucking finally. Just wanted to remind everyone, this could have been avoided if we alhad simply shot the shit out of him when he was sitting in the bar

>>32723439
He pretty much ceases to exist. You give a panicked, intense self-defense attack at what basically was sexual assault. Even after you're sure he's dead, you continue, eyes closed. He's already transformed back into a person, and unrecognizable with all the damage...

You get up, take a picture of the mess, and feel like crying.

Do you cry?

Your pants are still around your legs, by the by

>>32723506
Don't cry cut his dick off and pull your pants up and walk down to the office to claim your reward covered in blood

>>32723530
You have a picture of him, why take the penis?
It would only haunt you.

>>32723506
Cry like a bitch. Also taken his wallet in case pictures of an unregocnizable body aren't enough for Marsh all or the client

>>32723551
Yeah suck it up take a picture piss on the corpse and go

>>32723551
>>32723506
Listen you, erm us, fuck. We're going to get hard. Rock solid. A clean Operator. We don't cry, we take the penis.

>>32723558
You take his wallet and pull up your pants. Along the way, you cry some. You wonder if you should go to your apartment or straight to Marshall... You kind of look like a bitch right now. But do you want to look like a bitch in front of your boss, or the girl you're after?

>>32723617

Your boss, we must maintain our manly image in front of the girl

>>32723617
Psych the FUCK UP. Go to the boss. We all good.

>>32723617
The apartment ajust our glasses and wipe our eyes

>>32723641
woops did roll wrong lol

>>32723617
Go to Marshall. Stop crying. You just gained like +5 in homosexual seduction, lust fueled wizardry, and knife using body annihilation.

>>32723617
How much is in his wallet?

>>32723657
Whats the trip for?

>>32723689
I trip on /k/ and other boards, so i just don't take it off usually.

>>32723728
Then just say for attention thanks for giving me another name for the filter list though

>>32723638
>>32723641
You go straight for the Wet Works office, ignoring the secretary and storming down the hall. You place the wallet on the desk, but not before taking money out
>>32723669
About tree fiddy

Marshall doesn't look impressed, but he does give the money agreed upon. He is chuckling to himself some, now.
"I don't think you can handle this next one."

>>32723772
>>32723689
Shhh, there's a quest going on.

>>32723791
I think you sir, are wrong. What's the job?

>>32723791
"Of course I can handle this next one. It's probably a dryad or some shit. By the way, do you have a book on sorcery?"

Rolled 3

>>32723791

Bluff and say that you are totally ready for the next one.

Rolling for confidence

>>32723791
Lets just see what it is first then
Lets not jump to our death so quickly

>>32723818
>>32723804
"Son, do you know what a vegan is? And I mean a real, life-long, dedicated vegan?"
His tone goes grim, and stoic. He's talking as though it's from experience, like he survived a war or something.

>>32723930
Don't they, y'know, just not eat meat? Or fish, or eggs, or milk?

Sounds like a pussy. And they'll be weak from all the not-protein they consume.

We'll take it!

>>32723930
"It was dryads, wasn't it."

>>32723966
Lets not be a prick hes serious here
>>32723930
Tell him you dunno if your thinking about the same type of vegan

>>32723990
>Lets not be a prick
>We should have taken the penis

We should probably ask what happens to the bodies. Since, you know, we were seen "with" the victim.

>>32723966
"No, boy. Not guite. Sure they don't eat any animal related products, hell they don't even use leather, but it's their mentality. They're raised from a young age, training to hone their psychic ability. They're psionics, mental shock-troopers. Our best men still don't know entirely what they do to them at that institution... But whatever it is, marks them for life. Anyway, this bounty will actually require a bit of explanation."
Marshall pulls out a thick accordion binder.
"To be brief, vegans are raised their entire lives enclosed, being educated and conditioned, and then are let lose on the world when deemed worthy. The motivations of the people in power behind this are a mystery, but we do know is that whenever a vegan is needed, they are called upon to do their 'duty'; they prefer their wars won before they even begin. However, sometimes a vegan goes wrong, and god forbid he gets some eggs-'n-bacy in his system. That's when they send repo-men after him to take away his brain implant, usually killing him. The diet isn't what entirely gives them their power, after all. However, there is one individual by the name of Todd (just, Todd. We don't know anything else) who has somehow eluded them and it has pissed those vegan bastards off... And they want my organizations help to take him down. And I'm sending you to do it because it tickles my fancy. How does that all make you feel?"

>>32724091
"I liked getting my fancy tickled at The Vulgar Unicorn. Is Todd a sausage loving vegen? And what kind of psychic powers?"

>>32724091
That you kind of want to murder us?

Is this a sink or swim type thing?

We're going to need a bigger, better gun.

What other information do you have on him? Stuff like where he lives, whatever.

>>32724091
"don't worry we'll fuck him up"

>>32724132
"It is, indeed, a sink or swim kind of stiutation. And I have something for you..." He pulls out a steel box, and opens it
"It's some XP, so you can level up. Eight whole XPs to be precise. This ain't cheap, so use it wisely, okay?"

For 2 points of experience, players may buy a new skill relevant to what happened in the session. One extra hit point costs 3 experience points and one extra Defense costs 4 experience points.

"As for information, I have a whole dossier. He's living in some shotty apartment complex down the way from here, just waiting for someone to come in on him so he has an excuse to explode. His power is telekinetic, but he has NO telepathy. This is a huge misconception about vegans, and as far as we know, their tech doesn't go that far. So he's going to lift you up and throw you out a window, not neural-shock you and all the voices in your head."

I kept forgetting to hand out xp I was having so much fun. Sorry.

>>32724203
level up our fucking charisma so we can get laid...its been a long time since the prom after all

>>32724203
>>32724226
No, Int.

It has to be Int. We need to figure out how to figure out how to be charismatic with women.

Yes, it's that bad.

how about a new skill? what have we learned

>>32724226
Nooooo
skill up guns more hp and level up strength or agility so we don't get graped anymore
Hes just as smart as us

>>32724203
Let's pour our XP into our firearms skill like a desperate alcoholic chugging cough syrup to get drunk.

"Telekinetic, you say? Can he block bullets?"

>>32724203
>>32724226
>>32724246
level both charisma (with women) and fucking int (with women)
do we get any bonuses for being specific?

>>32724203

Can we also buy a new skill? I'm a sucker for skills.

>>32724279
Yes, you may buy a new skill pertaining to our current exploits and escapades.

>>32724258
Possible skillings
Knives
Guns
Seductions
stealth
intimidation
chemistry
see anything you like on the list?
Add something you feel relivent

>>32724279
Yeah! We kind of got lust empowerment magic in the heat of the moment. So. Yeah. New skills! (Maybe that one for free, too. We already used it, you know.)

>>32724226
>>32724269
>>32724279
We need to learn how to murder things better or the renegade vegan is going to splatter our anus all over his shitty apartment building.