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ITT: Autistic moments
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ITT: Autistic moments

>be me
>be slightly drunk at a bar with a friend
>qt male approaches, buys me a drink
>making casual conversation, I have bits and pieces of random knowledge from things, so I'm just listing off cool facts
>(ex. one of them was that a single blood cell takes roughly 60 seconds to transverse the whole body)
>he's laughing/smiling so I guess this is going good
>think of a really good fact i know
>"Oh I have this really great one!"
>realize that fact is actually really disgusting
>"...Actually, maybe not that one."
>he keeps prodding me to say it
>alright, what's the worst that could happen?
>"There's a species of larva or something of the like who's offspring is raised inside of the mother. It's always all females and one male. Then, the females all mate with the male, and eat their way out of the mother, leaving the male to die."
>he awkwardly laughs

Not sure what exactly happened after that, but he ended up "leaving early." Fml, /soc/.

Pic related, that's me
2bh, if I was him in that situation.
I'd think you were one of the crazy ones.

That being said (to my own detriment I might add) I like the crazy ones so take from that what you will.

I'd give some moments, but I actually have autism so technically speaking every moment is an autistic one. That being said I manage decently well.
Yeah, at that point he may have thought you were uninterested or something.
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>be me
>talking to qt 3.14 in community service group about vaping
>"yeah I used to have one of those douchey vape boxes"
>she pulls out a competition rig or whatever the fuck they're called
I believe this is a parasite that eats its way through a caterpillar if I remember correctly.

I would have said something like you can mate with me and I will end up eating my way out of you.
you are the "Sapiosexual"
I'm with you, anon 。゚・(>﹏<)・゚。
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>be me
>16 at the time
>in christian youth group
>texting this qt /shg/
>going bretty gud
>making 16 year old jokes to amuse
>one joke is about german sex dungeon in my house
>1 hour radio silence
>later on get call from her number
>It's her dad
>screams at me, tells me he's going to kill me
>wants to speak to my parents
>hang up. nop

tfw when processing phone call

god don't real, f a m
Could've been worse
If I were the guy in that situation I probably would've pulled out my phone to look it up right there

I don't go out much
Fucking kek, my condolences

It was on a cruise so even if he tried to pull out his phone it would have been useless. However, thank you for making me feel less like an idiot.
Shoulda said russian sex dungeon fampai
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I wish that was the only time I've went full Sperglord

>be me, last night
>taking group picture with student government officers
>short brown chick (7/10) in charge of recruiting stands in front of me and does the "sorority squat"
>been standing too long, knees buckle
>accidentally connect my semi-chub with her ass
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holy kek.
The only question is if it will come off too creepy because of the original context or if its funny enough/flirtatious to work.

I guess I'll contribute some of my more autistic stories. Might as well.
>Be three years ago
>16 at the time.
>Exchange program in France for a couple weeks
>Exchange family has son my age
>It's the beginning of summer and his classmates are having a end of school party
>We get there
>About 30 people give or take
>Drinking a little, hookah set up etc
Fast forwarding to the specific point
>A bit tipsy by now
>Two french girls come up to me speaking in French to each other, looking at me and giggling
>I don't speak french so I have no idea what they're saying
>One starts laughing nervously
>The other speaks up
>"She says she wants to have sex with you."
At this point in time I'd never even kissed a girl.
>I freeze up, w-what do I say brain?
>Yes? Maybe? Flirt?
>I end up trying to think of something for multiple seconds and don't say anything
>She repeats what she said, possibly thinking I didn't understand because of her accent.
>I mumble okay and walk out to the balcony.
I regret not saying something ever since.
I did end up losing my virginity a couple months ago, and got my first kiss a little while after I came back from France, but still.
Not many people would've been able to say they lost their virginity to a french girl.
if you had of said this to me I probably would have switched from "not interested" to "immediately hit on"

nice fact, OP

r.i.p. in peace my sides.

>Talking to guy in class
>Says he just somehow misspelled bicycle
>Laugh and ask how
>Reveals he has mild autism
>Without thinking, go "Ha, figures."
>Gets pissed
>Apologize profusely

I have so many more ahaha
I didn't mean it guys, I really didn't
>Not many people would've been able to say they lost their virginity to a french girl.

Yeah, except for, you know, people from France, Belgium, Switzerland... other Western Europeans, French Canadians, exchange students, backpackers...

A small, elite group indeed.
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pic related

she also asked if i wanted to go partying with her and i said "ill think about it" and then never texted back

she was a college track athlete
That reminds me of the time I added someone from here in a skype thread who really wanted to play smash brothers, and he kept talking really strangely and with this child-like tone, all the while insisting he was 24. I thought he was just a kid trying to pretend, and kept subtly poking fun at him, since kids shouldn't even be on 4chan and if he's gonna be a kid and go on 4chan at least I can make fun of him in ways that'll go over his head.

...then I looked up his skype. He really was 24, he posted on /lgbt/ with a picture once. I felt really bad and basically just wanted to stop talking to him out of shame.
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It was spur of the moment.
I never tell anyone I have autism unless someone asks me that specifically.

Which as it turns out, nobody outside of authority figures ever has.

I meant other Americans m8. Thought that was obvious. Not a lot of people I know have even left the country, let alone gotten laid by a foreigner (for their first time or otherwise).

Another story:
>Message a girl I had a crush on my junior year back in HS
>Liked her for a while, but she was a grade ahead of me and I really don't approach people
>My friend convinced me to do something
>The message I sent asked her if she ever wanted to hang out and watch a movie or something
This was before the age of "netflix and chill" and I honestly had meant just hanging out. I had no other ulterior motive, at this point I'd only kissed someone.
>She says she is busy
>I say well if you're ever free let me know
>She never says anything
A couple months later she ends up sharing something about how dudes asking to hang out just want a piece of ass.

I cringe even though I had no ill intention. Probably because I didn't realize how it might have been taken.
Europeans aren't people, silly~
it still haunts me today

i had no idea she was trying to get it on. she even came to my room drunk one night so i started giving her water.
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Dam son, you fucked up here, but I totally feel you
My life is high functioning beta-tier autism

I once decided not to sleep with a girl because it "was not the right thing to do" because I was talking to this other girl.
I was literally in bed with this girl and then I just "nah"

tfw next day the girl I was talking to breaks up with me.

>Can you feel it
so... you didn't cheat on your gf?
I use the term "break up" for lack of a better term.

She was a girl I hooked up with once and we texted sometimes.
Was holding out for her.
Im just completely oblivious. A chick was touching me and leaning really close to me when i was watching a movie at a party with her and the next day she asked me over if i was going to kiss her that night

Had no idea
is that you in the pic OP?
you're super cute, too cute for /soc/

do you have any contact info?
>be me
>think op is adorable
>green text about it

Yea, that sounds about right
i'm having a hard time believing it's her tbqh
I feel you here anon. I usually just ask to have lunch or something first. Or if they are going to some festival that seems pretty dank, I'll ask if they need a ride or something. Managed to hang with a high school crush a few months ago since she didn't have a ride and really wanted to go.
You are very pretty. Ha-ha its funny to see all of the other spergy people on here. It's not just me.
>I like the crazy ones.

Here we go again. This anon thinks he's getting pussy tonight. Or is just stupid. Either or, they're both /soc/ in a nutshell.
Nah man.
I have no hopes of getting with a random chick off of 4chan man.
However, objectively, all of my ex's were crazy.
"Normal" chicks are boring to me honestly.

But like I said, in exchange for the crazy chicks you have to be willing to put up when their craziness is directed at you.
Also to add, the reason I said that was to give examples that not all guys would run away upon a chick saying what OP did.

We all can be miserably alone together and share in our experiences via the web.
Speaking of crazy chicks, the very first time I've ever had sex this girl held a knife to my neck and she let me stab into her back. Convinced I will stay single until I find someone to do this to again.
Holy shit my man.
Just the tip of the blade I'm assuming?
Good luck bruh.
That's the crazy of crazies.
more pics pls
The mutilation of the word 'crazy' is so cringe worthy these days. Lemme give you an example of what it sounds like when you say 'Normal' chicks. Take it with or without offense, it is up to you.

>God, all the girls I ever get with are so damn crazy, I must have a thing for crazy girls, If I don't deem a girl 'crazy' then she's just too normal for me.

And that amounts to: A girl needs a straight jacket or bipolar meds or she's too normal. Otherwise it sounds like: I like putting 'crazy' at the beginning of things to make it sound exotic.

Like, do people really think you can just put 'crazy' in front of 'chick' and suddenly it exists? That's such a cop-out of social variance. What OP said was a socially awkward situation with alcohol involved. IF you call that crazy it's cringe-worthy and you're acting like she's just agreeing with you.

Now THIS anon has had a crazy girlfriend. I almost don't believe him, but it's an example nonetheless. Putting a fucking knife to your love interest's throats is pretty fucking crazy mostly because people could actually get HURT doing it. And that's exactly what happened. Luckily it appears to be that anon's fetish.
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>freshman year of college
>teacher asks us to work with person next to us
>cute girl is next to me
>she's into me
>she says something about being voted most likely to succeed in HS
>I say it's better than mine of being voted most likely to shoot up the school
>she requests another partner
>I never hear from her again
>no woman has shown interest in me since
>people avoid me at school now, eat, sleep, study alone for 3 years after that
sometimes I just want to die
and I thought having a girl ask me to slap her was a bit weird. Im so vanilla I could be the fruit of an orchid.

But on the other hand I have sex fairly regularly.
Basically I'm convinced you don't know what crazy means. Forget 'language changes'. Crazy is a negative word, a derogative term. Weird is one thing, claiming you like crazy, dangerous girls and then calling a chick with a knife 'the crazy of crazy' looks a little fucked up. You're comparing an extremely broad spectrum of women who might consider themselves a little weird and comparing them to bitches putting knives to people's throats.
I'll rephrase then.
Chicks who act outside of typical social norms.
Descriptive enough for you man?

Someone who stands out from the crowd, in other words, even if to most/some people it is in a negative aspect.

Crazy is a hell of a lot easier of a descriptor then writing all that out though.

Crazy/Weird are interchangeable in my opinion, just the former being a more extreme version of the latter.
See the problem with making your opinion that crazy/weird are interchangeable is that most people think 'crazy' is bad. Not just 'oh it's weird' but literally 'Dude that's fucked up' bad. That's what most people see. It's just so cringe-worthily edgy to say it like that. Weird works better in general. It can't be more extreme if you both

A. Don't use weird at all.
And B. Use Crazy more than you use weird.

At that point most women would hear you and think you're grouping them in with the kind of girls who seriously need to be put on meds. That's very very rarely a complement and I don't put my faith in any woman who would take it as one.
fucking kek
Well that's on other people.
I don't see crazy as a bad thing.

Just a case of subjective views of the higher meanings of words and how that translates to real life I guess.

That being said, even if I thought a chick was, I'd never call her weird/crazy.

I'm not that oblivious.

Not normally a conversation I'd have man. This is the kind of thing you mostly leave as an internal monologue and never discuss with others so it doesn't really ever become an issue.
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wew, lad
Femanon btw. Weird is nicer and more suitable word than crazy. OPs story was hardly autistic. Hardly even awkward. If anything the guy was autistic if he placed any importance on what she said as she was listing facts drunk.
Higher meaning of words? Uhuh. Well at least you're not totally oblivious. But careful when you say it's on 'other' people. If you bring a gun into the public and fire it into the air to show your best friend, and everyone freaks out and calls the cops, just because you don't see what was wrong doesn't mean it's on them either. Only in this case it's socially shooting into a public place.
Like I said.
It's not the sort of thing that I would ever bring up in conversation in person.
The nature of this site changes the conversation.

Blame it on the autism if you want, I don't care.
Social subconscious is P. dumb desu.

Probably why I tend to avoid initiating social interactions.
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See, this chick gets it. Crazy, huh?
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did you just compare shooting a firearm in public to using a common word on an anonymous image board?
Of course not. I just compared one act of autism to another act of autism. They do it all the time on /k/, don't they?
That was a fucking rad fact.

That guy was intimidated by your knowledge and fucked off since he is a Beta cuck that idealizes males as a more intelligent species and just wanted a dumb bimbo to chat up and fuck.

You need to take no offence and know that you have the "interesting chat to get a guy to like you instead of lust after you" down to a science to bad some fag heard it and it got under his manicured skin
newfags gonna newfag
this entire thread is a great example
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