Has anyone actually truly feared existence? What do I mean by this? Well here's what I mean: have you ever thought deeply enough to understand that existence in ANY FORM is scary? It's scary mainly because it's unexplainable and will never be explained. I'm wondering if you guys have ever thought this before as most other people havent (they're atheist or theist and believe in some form of physics or story that explains how the universe exists). I am personally agnostic which is technically atheist but as to how everything exists, I don't have any ideas mainly because I think it's impossible to have an idea. Hawking said at some point that the universe is self-created, correct? My point is, even if that's truly the case (it makes kinda sense) it doesn't matter as existence is just mind-boggling. We are all confined to our bodies and understand things on a level of being a human so we think of some form of creation instead of "stuff" just existing. Am I the only one who has thought of shit like this? I've though about death and all this shit since I was very young and my mother was often scared as she thought I was some sort of demon. I've always wanted to do cosmology or theoretical physics concerning the infrastructure of the universe but am I crazy to think that either way this shit will never be answered? Does this make me very intelligent? I've always thought I was very intelligent but I'm not a genius in terms of academics (well to be fair anything I pick up I can usually master a lot of it is just old shit I dont go relearn). TLDR: Am I crazy for knowing existence of anything is unexplainable and scary?
It's called an existential crisis fuckwit. We all have them when we're 15.
You aren't special.
>Am I the only one who has thought of shit like this?
No, not by a long shot. I've felt that way for pretty much every moment of my trans-immortal life. It's not something that ever goes away, you just kinda have to push it to the back of your mind where the probability that it won't come back to bite you is smallest.
I have this feeling too. I can trigger real panic by repeating the word "I exist, I exist". I felt it first when I was around 17. Now I am 40. Anyway, I can find some kinda cure in the Buddhist concept of Anatta... realising that your "self" is an illusion can be very relaxing when you have this fear of existence.
What is this "relaxation" of which you speak?
We can't comprehend existence so there is nothing to be afraid of.
We are too dumb to fear the thought.
>Does this make me very intelligent? I've always thought I was very intelligent but I'm not a genius in terms of academics
>I've always thought I was very intelligent
Well after that nightmare of a post I'm going to have to respectfully disagree
A continuous topological structure that defines all definable thing. Or else the intersection of that structure with the causal crystal, but that makes it harder to explain.
>1. Not 15.
then you're late, most of us resolve it when we're 15.
>2. I'm not saying I am special.
>3. Every time I try to start a thread like this you assholes come in and say this shit.
1. we're right
2. stop making this thread again and again you fucking spastic
3. you're really, really stupid.
I feel you, OP. Ignore the edgelords and shitposters. The best you can do is get busy enough so you don't have time to think about it. Otherwise it'll always stay with you at the back of the head.
I like the romanticised idea of intelligence existence being universe trying to figure itself out.
I'm actually more worried about people who don't think about this. Our existence is too special to just brush it off like that. Even if life is not rare in our universe, intelligent life is clearly too thinly spread out for one to meet another. Sadly though I don't have high hopes for humanity, and it'll meet its end before reaching other stars. Probably turning Earth into another planet, one of many, of which bore intelligent life which couldn't pass the test of spreading to other planets.