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>Gain free tickets to AnvilFest 2015 >It's some sort

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Thread replies: 44
Thread images: 6

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>Gain free tickets to AnvilFest 2015
>It's some sort of Anvil Convention for Anvil Hoarders.
>The Anvil Hoarder (1930) is going to be playing so I figure why not?
>I enter the theatre room
>I am the only one without an anvil, feel slightly silly
>The title-scene wipes onto the screen and all of these people start smashing their anvils with hammers
>The noise is unbearable and there are sparks and pieces of crab flying everywhere
>One man lets go of his hammer mid-air and it kills his wifes son with a blow to the head
>A spark settles on a piece of chair upholstery and catches fire
>The fire spreads hastily, half the place is on fire and the exits are unreachable
>Some realise what a terrible mistake they have made
>In their regret, they try bargaining off their anvils to other anvil hoarders
>I couldn't quite hear the replies, but it seemed as if many of them had too many anvils as it was
>By this time, more than 3/4 of the people are either severely burned, or dead
>Screams of "When will I be rid of this anvil?!" fill the air
>I make my way to the corner of the room and sob whilst in the fetal position
>After what feels like a life time, I see firefighters flood the entrance
>By this time I am the only one left alive, the theatre is a nightmare of corpses and anvils
>The Anvil Law in my city states that if you witness the death of an anvil owner, you now own his anvil
>A firefighter comes over to me and checks if I am OK
>I am in shock and panic, and all I can think about is how many anvils I now own
>"Would you like an anvil?" I ask him, hardly able to string a sentence together
>He states he has too many as it is
>The enormity of my involuntary possession of all these anvils overwhelms me
>I grab the nearest rogue hammer and star blugeoning the man
>All I can scream is "When will I be rid of these anvils?!"
>Now doing life in prison for neglecting my duty as a citizen to adopt the deceased mens anvils
>>
holly shit man 10/10 that is somew straight up dope
>>
>>4051234
thanks. anvilposting is the new hot meme friend just ask /tv/
>>
N I C E M E M E T B H

I

C

E

M

E

M

E

T

B

H
>>
>fired from work because i dropped my anvil on some kid

when will i be rid of this anvil
>>
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>go to the cinema
>carrying my anvil into the theatre
>assistant stops me
>sorry sir, but you must leave your anvils outside
>ask him how i am going to open up my crab legs without my hammer and anvil
>spouts some shit about healthy and safety
>reluctantly leave my anvil with all the other anvils people have had to leave
>The Anvil Hoarder (1930) finishes (great anvilcore)
>all the anvils are gone
>an anvil hoarder has stolen all the anvils
>he did me a favour, i have too many as it is
>>
>>4051225
>>4051250
>>4051253
who are you quoting?
>>
>>4051269
the hell you on about
>>
>>4051272
the hell you on about
>>
>>4051299
the hell you on about
>>
>>4051269
>>4051272
>>4051299
>>4051300
the hell you on about
>>
>>4051305
the hell you smithing on
>>
>Ask my wife's boyfriend if I can borrow my car
>After a full service I'm ready to hit the road and go see The Anvil Hoarder: Critical Mass (1934)
>Make it past the security checkpoint just fine because I just paid off my oxygen license
>There's a transgod at the counter
>Perform the customary bow and ask for a ticket for me and my pestle
>Xe bursts out into laughter and tells me it's an anvil-only theatre
>A gaggle of young blacksmiths who all have white gf's and very large anvils start calling me little mortar bowl boy
>Decide to leave my mortar and pestle in a designated safe space and get laughed at again for buying a ticket for one
>Trying to watch the movie but I start crying because I can't eat my crab legs
>Think I'll just go take a nice comfort shower and go back home
>I walk over to my safe space only to find three proud healthy women breaking my mortar and pestle into pieces and eating it
>After sucking their toes in thanks I finally get to go back home and cook dinner for my wives sons
>>
>>4051269
this meme is not funny, please end it.
>>
>>4051717
the hell you on
>>
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>>4051825
>be me 13
>get my first anvil for my birthday and am told I am an adult now
>take my anvil and hammer and customary bag of crab legs out to the wilderness for my 7 day trek to become an official anvil man
>walk for only 200 feet and i am completely tired, can't walk any further because the anvil is so heavy
>my uncle, brother and grandfather and father begin throwing cram legs at me and shouting "go! Go! Be an anvil man!"
>somehow pick up the anvil and make it all the way into the woods 500 feet away
>collapse into a heap and weep on my anvil
>night time comes and i sleep in the dent in the ground that my anvil made when it fell, nestling close to my anvil for warmth
>by the next afternoon i have built a sled for my anvil out of tree limbs and sapling bark
>day 3 and i have run out of crab legs and i am completely lost, wandering around with my anvil
>day 4 and i am blind with thirst and struggling to live, i begin to curse my anvil for the trouble it has brought
>suddenly a vision appears in the distance, a bright light and a giant anvil and metal crab begin lumbering towards me
>i shield my eyes and the crab speaks to me and says
>you're a man now, what shall you name your anvil
>crab gives me a case of soda and unlimited crab legs and butter
>i name my anvil mr. krabs in honor of my vision
>i am now a man
>with renewed energy i capture and slay the nearest wolf and drink his blood and several sodas
>i hear my family cheering in the distance
>mfw
>>
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Anvil
>>
>>4051879
wow thanks some anvil oc
>>
>>4051901
What's that picture? It looks bold and brash.
>>
>>4051901
abstract anvilee
>>
>>4051911
more like belongs in the trash amirite guys lmao
>>
>>4051901
that's squidward tho lol
>>
>>4052087
u wot m8
>>
> be 12 years old me
> anxious and awkward, divorced parents hate each other and use me as escapegoat
> "friends" who used to round up over the wall when my grandma pick me up in school and started to yell that I was gay for no reason at all
> started to come back from school alone by foot so she wouldnt see them doing this kind of shit to me
> really long walk/live in a hot country
> would always pass through a small one-floor shopping on my way home so I could get some cool from the air conditioner inside
> would get really nervous alone in there walking between so many people
> to avoid this, created a "game" where the pockets in my pants would be magical
> inside the left one there would be some sort of infinite hole where anything could be found
> I would grab inside it and get something to help me through anxiety
> It usually was a magical mask like the one from The Mask movie.
> It would change my personallity so I would not be nervous. Actually worked. I pretended to myself that I was crazy and didn't cared about anything
>but nothing could come for free. I knew that.
>so the pocket on the right would be cursed.
>If I put my hand inside it, there would be another "magical hole"
>instead of infinite magical things, this would have only anvils
> like an infinite dimension full of all kinds of anvils from all shapes and sizes
> would always avoid putting my hand in it because an anvil was really heavy and useless
> it was the price I had to pay for the magic on the left pocket
> spent years doing this
> still think about it to this day
> it is a fucking true story
> anvil meme comes out
> wish I was wearing pants right now
>>
>>4051225
>>4051250
>>4051253
>>4051717
>>4051879
>>4052565
>>4052565
There are several serious issues with your essay that need correction. First, the lack of citations is alarming. Plagiarism is a serious problem in academia, and an act that is not tolerated on [s4s]. Please properly source your quotes. Second, the entirety of your essay is quotes. This is also plagiarism! Learn to develop your own voice, incorporating in properly-cited facts and ideas from other sources as you build your argument. (See Chapter 2.5 for more information.) See me after class, and I can give you additional guidance.
>>
>>4052565
Who are you quoting?
>>
>>4053130
the hell you on about
>>
Hey man what weight class anvil are you using?
>>
>>4053645
I don't know about the plebs pretending to know about anvils here but I am a professional anvil competitor and only compete in the 80 to 90lb class, anyone who uses lesser anvils is a pantywaist and anyone who uses bigger ones is an idiot basically

>using tiny anvils or huge, ungainly anvils in a competition
>muh babby anvils
>muh humongous manvils

please anvil plebberinos, your just going to get reky by the 80-90lb class no matter what you do
>>
>>4053648
i only use my anvil collection to open crab legs. the ones i do not use just collect dust. thinking about getting rid of some as i have too many as it is.
>>
>>4053877
>77
two same nubbre
>>
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>>4053877
7+7
>>
>>4051225
TLDR you dumb frogposter
>>
>>4053888
>888
FROGPOSTERS ON SUICIDE WATCH
>>
>>4053888
trips confirm i guess
>>
>>4053888
HAMMERhead
>>
>>4053911
DUBShead
>>
>>4051225
who are you quoting, dumb frogposter?

>>4051250
>>4051253
>>4051717
>>4051879
>>4052565
>>4053648
who are YOU quoting?
>>
>>4053956
the hell you on about
>>
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>>
>>4051225 (OP)
>who are you quoting, dumb frogposter?

>>4051250
>>4051253
>>4051717
>>4051879
>>4052565
>>4053648
>who are YOU quoting?
>>
>>4054594
can you stop calling me that.
>>
>>4054600
Sure thing, Dubs Meister
Thread posts: 44
Thread images: 6


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