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How do you stop hating yourself? How do you...
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001

Thread replies: 104
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How do you stop hating yourself? How do you learn to genuinely love yourself?
>>
You have to separate who you are from the person other people tell you that you are

Good luck with that tho its tuff
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>>26493742
Be a stupid person only idiots like themselves as they cant see their flaws.
>>
You have to completely lack self-awareness like the normies so that you can pretend your flaws don't exist and that the world revolves around you.
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>>26493872
>>26493928
I said "genuinely". Meaning to genuinely be accept and love yourself. Not decieve yourself
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>>26493970
Who do you currently genuinely accept and love?

I'd suggest you become like them, however is necessary.
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>>26493970
What do you specifically hate about yourself anon?
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It doesn't matter wether you love or hate yourself, I love myself, still unhappy
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>>26494019
I don't accept or love anyone. I still love my ex sort of but I don't want become her or anything
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I was recently diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder.

As soon as I started taking the prescribed medicine, I felt so much better. I have realized this is how normies feel all the time, and it's fantastic.

I don't love love love myself, but I am okay with myself. I have started losing weight because I'm slightly chubby, but I'm still okay with myself. I am a NEET KV who is now happy to be alone. I belly laugh all the time at stupid thoughts I have, things I post on 4chan, and things I send to my one friend in the whole world. I constantly talk to myself at home and in the car, and I make myself laugh a lot.

Avoid SSRIs at all costs, though.
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>>26494050
I don't know what specifically hate about myself. But I certainly don't love myself. I can't even work up the effort to work hard for myself and make my life better and I certainly can't genuinely love anyone else
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>>26494151
I'm in the same situation. You need to reject the values which society tries to impose upon you. There's no material basis for them and you will feel much happier if you try and live your life in the way that you want and not how you think other people want you to live.
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>>26494130
I hate medication so much though. It doesn't feel genuine and the side effects it has on personality and creativity are not worth it. Also my biggest fear is being alone. I want to share my life with someone and be able to start a family but I can't while I hate myself.
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>>26493742
You don't have to love yourself. You learn to accept who you are, and realise that other people don't care about your fuck-ups, so you shouldn't either. Enjoy being you.

Have a hug. c(^.^c)
>>
>>26494196
But the way I want to live my life is mainly by the values that society impose. I want to be able to connect with other people and start a family and what not.
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You have to be worth loving in the first place.
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You think you're shit.

You need proof of the contrary.

How do you get it? I don't know. Trying to find it as well.
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>>26493742

shave.
stop fappan to porn
get gf
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>>26494294
I don't think strict adherence to social norms is a prerequisite for starting a family. Contrary to what you might hear on r9k not all women are complete sheep who only go for Chads. As long as you have a job which will enable you to provide security etc. you will be able to start a family.
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>>26493742

If you ever find out, tell me.
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>>26493928
Alternatively you could just, not be sad over your flaws.
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>>26494457
how though senpai?
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IF YOU CAN'T LOVE YOURSELF AS YOU ARE
MAKE YOURSELF INTO SOMEONE YOU CAN LOVE

LIFT
DIET
SHAVE
FIND SOME HOBBIES OTHER THAN WATCHING ANIME AND POSTING ON ANONYMOUS IMAGE BOARDS

BECOME THE MAN YOU WERE ALWAYS MEANT TO BE ANON

I BELIEVE IN YOU FAMILY
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>>26494550
>FIND SOME HOBBIES OTHER THAN WATCHING ANIME AND POSTING ON ANONYMOUS IMAGE BOARDS
Nothing else interests me.

Music, videogames, anime, internet, sleep.
Music, videogames, anime, internet, sleep.
Music, videogames, anime, internet, sleep.

I have no drive, no passion, no raison d'etre.
>>
>>26494320
this exactly. how can accept myslef when Im so selfish, lazy, cowardly, etc. I mean I can accept flaws like how I have dyspraxia or I'm never gonna be the best at anything but I can't accept being a "robot".

>>26494425
You're right. I dont want to be a normie or change my personality to be chad but I do want to atleast be able to accept myself enough to be able to work hard for myself and then eventually work hard for those I care about

>>26494550
I really want to but I just hate myself too much to do it.
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>>26494550
I tried this but ultimately I hate myself no matter how much lifting I do, how much I diet or shave or engage myself in new hobbies.
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>>26494436
>>26493742
ITT: we try to achieve the epiphany Shinji has at the end of NGE but fail
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>>26494629
Do you have a job or are you studying?
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>>26494695
because life is not a cartoon
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>>26494226

Can semi-relate. I dislike medication because it alters your mind, thus instead of healing the cracks and broken thoughts, it completely clouds them, making you a different person.
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>>26494727
I do some part time work for my grandma every now and then but other than that I am a NEET
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>>26494758
To add, making you a different person to yourself, and the pre-medication me wouldn't want it, even if the medicated me was fine with it.
>>
You don't.

It's the hatred that keeps you going, to keep bettering yourself. I work to hopefully, one day, become the kind of person that I respect.

I'll probably fail, but I still tried. And on that day, I decided that I'll go face first into a wood chipper. If I'm going out, I'll go out metal.
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>>26494819
>It's the hatred that keeps you going, to keep bettering yourself.
It's really making me want to give up though.
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>>26494695
tfw you will never have a moment of catharsis like this
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>>26494784
What would you like to do? Not necessarily a specific career but what would your ideal job involve?
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>>26494695
what epiphany hes still a whiny emotional bitch
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I stopped hating myself once my acne went away and I got a proper office job.
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Also don't feel like you "deserve" anything, because you know hell well that nobody deserves anything.
Not even basic respect.

With that said, still allow yourself to fuck up. Be vulnerable. Know that even in literally the worst circumstances you're still fine.
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>>26494839

Then give up. That's the easy way out.

And I'm not even trying to be like a self-help fuck nozzle. The only reason that I go on each day is the thought that I can do better than I did yesterday. You just have to find something that you want to do, and it took me 27 years to find it. But now that I have, I have a purpose again.
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>>26493872
These flaws can be forgiven. Better if they are since everyone has some.
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>>26494907
I don't even know what. I have tried starting courses in all sorts of things and have had multiple jobs. I always end up finding them all equally stressful and get really anxious. Then once I get too stressed I just give up.
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>>26495012
>everyone has some.
Other people have positive qualities to make up for their flaws though.
>>
>stop listening to Jew media
>disregard all lefty bullshit
>don't ever listen to women or feminists
>start reading the classics
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>>26495059
I already do all of those things. If I listened to Jew media I would be perfectly comfortable with being degenerate and seek to destroy myself more and wouldn't be trying make myself a better person now
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>>26494617
>>26494629
>>26494636
Sorry to hear that guys.
Best I can do is give you a pat on the back and tell you not to give up, then.
>>
Where do I find the motivation to improve myself so I can love myself?
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>>26495180
>not to give up
Why?
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>>26495040
If you don't see any in yourself, they can still be attained.
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I never will i disagree with 95% of what the world has become. I rather be dead then accept the bullshit.
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>>26495203
>You have to improve yourself to love yourself
>You have to love yourself to improve yourself
HOW!?!?!?
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>>26495215
I was supposed to acquire and hone positive qualities over the last 22 years. It's a little late to play catch-up.
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>>26495260

By finding a purpose. This isn't going to come to you easy.

I had to get cajoled into helping out a friend of my parents at the local animal shelter. I've been there for 7 years now.

I got lucky, I'm not denying that. Before that, I was happy to drink myself to death, and I still do, at a slower pace. But, I've found something that makes me feel better about myself, and I work with people who appreciate who I am and what I do. I was an antisocial fuck when I started, but no matter how badly I reacted with the people, the animals knew that I was a good person. It was seeing them every day, caring for them until they got adopted, that helped me find my place.
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>>26493742
Think of all the best moments of your life and realize with enough work

you could be that person everyday and strive to happy
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>>26495414
>Think of all the best moments of your life
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>>26495414
>Think of all the best moments of your life
The only times I can think of are when my mum or my ex praised me. I can't live off other people's praise while hating myself at the same time REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
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>>26494695
NGE truly is the best.

>>26494940
You say that, but he's the one who's gonna repopulate the world with a Asuka.

Also how do we do spoilers in this shithole.
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>>26494940
this epiphany
>>
you don't.
the only option to escape this hell is becoming an hero

and i'm getting closer and closer to taking that route
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>>26494940
>baww, he's not muh traditional Chad hero
>baww, if I were in his position, I would handle it great
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>>26495602
>becoming a hero
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>>26493742
I realized recently that the happiest times in my life were when I had a reason to achieve something. The summer after my freshman year of HS, I dropped about 50 lbs. because I wanted to impress a girl. My first semester of college, I got a 4.0 because I wanted to impress my parents.

Most of my life has been spent trying to seek the approval of others and using it as a means of improving myself and my situation. People say that in order to love someone, you have to learn to love yourself first, but all my experience is to the contrary. It was because I loved someone else that I eventually came to love myself, whether physically or academically.

Even so, that sort of love is temporary and eventually fades. I guess that's why I've gained weight and had a C average only a couple of years after my first semester.

OP, my answer to your question is that I don't know, but I hope you find a reason to improve and live and love that isn't so transient.
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>>26495343
It's not. I'm 26 & haven't made much of an attempt to improve my character and abilities until recently. Things begin to not seem as hopeless when you're constantly striving towards something, as this means a valid reason to have optimism. By doing this you're constantly becoming better and will eventually seeing the greater things you're capable of. It's a life without some commitment that's not worth faring through, since humans are not motivated & do not find meaning in life through pure objectivity. Instead, they find it through passion, desire, and moral commitment.
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I just want someone to want me.
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>>26495451
>>26495510
You asked how to stop "hating yourself". That's how, you only see the best part of yourself and your life.

You have to choose to be happy because true happiness comes from within. No one is going to force you to be happy with your life. You have to make the choice, and if something bothers either change, tolerate, or ignore it.

That's all there is to it.
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>>26495556
pretty fucking easy to have that realization after a gay bishounen space jesus confesses his unconditional love for and sacrifices himself for you
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>>26495702
>Why would anyone want you?
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>>26495775
what, that's never happened to you before?
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>>26493742
you don't love yourself you idiot. you're so full of flaws, how could anyone love that? the trick isn't to "love yourself", that's some stupid normy tier meme they created to feed their small egos without exerting much effort to change.what you really want is self-respect, or something you can feel good about.
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>>26495779
>asking why anyone would want them
>using the still pic from when she is asking Shinji to kiss her
Top irony tbhl
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>>26495757
>you only see the best part of yourself and your life
There are no best parts. I'm not being stubborn I'm being truthful.
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>>26493742
>tfw if best friend was a girl we'd be having sex and I'd have like no problems

I'd be so mentally stable....
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>>26495852
There's always a best part.

Even people born blind, deaf and limbless

Still manage to take their first breath and enjoy breathing in the air around them
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>>26495779
I dunno dude. That's the crisis I deal with every day. I want to be wanted but I don't have anything to offer.
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>>26495795
seriously. i don't know what he's talking about. i've had at least five or six angels kill themselves for me.
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>>26493742
You don't. We're all pretty fucking terrible and we deserve to hate ourselves. But that doesn't mean you should stop being a functional person. Just because you hate yourself doesn't mean you don't still have to work, be just and kind towards others, and shower regularly.
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>>26495961
You haven't had Best Angel kill themselves for you though.
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>>26495910
Then just give up. That's the only reasonable thing you can do. Find happiness elsewhere.
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I've always found myself in conflict. Later I realized I am the one putting myself in conflict by choice.

I hate formalities, or getting compliments. I always feel uncomfortable when people are being nice to me. When people are being shit to me, I enjoy it and usually manage to end that conflict in my favor.

I can be nice, I can socialize and I think I can land a gf if I tried hard and lied about how I feel.

I hate myself but like myself when I'm hated by someone else.
>>
>>26496156
Literally the only hope I have for the future is that I'll make someone happy. If I give up on that, I have nothing.
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>>26496188
But you won't. People make themselves happy. If you can't make yourself happy, then you'll still be unhappy even if someone does want you.
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>>26496235
You're most likely right. I'll probably end up giving up soon.
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Explain to me why not hating myself would be a good idea.
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>>26495515
Fuck off newfag shipper. Kill yourself.
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>>26496188
>If I give up on that, I have nothing.
If you give up on making yourself happy by means of betterment, you'll have nothing.
We live solely for ourselves because we're selfish by default & we cannot really help it. The desire for altruism is a facade for the desire for you to think higher of yourself through means of benefiting others. It doesn't mean you shouldn't want & strive to make others happy, but it should give you some insight on who's most important to attempt to make happy now.
>>26496417
By giving up you'll never achieve a sense fulfillment. The desire for achieving fulfillment is the reason we persist. Give up, & you would only be deeply burdened by regret.
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>>26496493
Giving up on the unobtainable is also part of becoming a functional adult.
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>>26496700
>I want one friend.

>UNOBTAINABLE, GIVE IT UP AND MOVE ON
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>>26496754
Give it up and move on. You get it now.
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>>26496700
You're referring to fulfillment or the relationship as being unobtainable?
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>>26496834
Fulfillment. You can't fulfill someone. They can't fulfill you. Only you can find that for yourself.
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>>26496847
I agree. Fine as long as you're not implying fulfillment is unobtainable.
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>>26494108
If you want to stop despising yourself then you need to literally stop caring about anything, we're here on this earth for a short amount of time meaning that anything we will ever do or not do is meaningless anyway.

Just do whatever makes you fucking happy and stop caring about what other clueless peoples opinions are of you, then you might learn to stop hating yourself.
>>
>>26497135
WEW NIHILISM FUCK DA POLICE CLIMB A MOUNTAIN CARPE DIEM
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>>26497147
Not even that, it just got me thinking recently when someone said that games are a waste of time.

What wouldn't be classed as a waste of time, if you get enjoyment out of it then do it.
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>>26493742
>How do you learn to genuinely love yourself?

By someone else loving you and showing you how it's done.
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>>26497261
>that file name tho
well done anon, cheers to you
>>
Any recommended books? Shows? Im currently in this slump. Was prescribed buproprion but dont feel any different
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>>26497349
Neon Genesis Evangelion
Love & Pop
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>>26495702
>when anime tries to be deep
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>>26493742
You don't
>Fuck You
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>>26497530
it's from a comedy show
>>
I don't know how to love myself. There's nothing to love. I have no talents or skills or interests or anything to offer. And when people talk about how easy self-acceptance is for them, it makes me feel even more incompetent and frustrated that I can't just do it. I wanna be a better person but I don't feel able. My fuckin pilot light is burned out or something. I've been running on fumes for years.

What makes you guys get up in the morning? I don't have anything. Most days I don't even get out of bed.
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the only thing I am is good academically
I have no other redeeming qualities, there's nothing else
I kick ASS in university, no matter the subject, I can learn it

and ironically, I don't give a fucking shit about academics, my deepest wish is for people to love me, but at that, I'm fucking terrible.

i sometimes feel my life is god telling a big fucking joke to the rest of the angels, I know it's edgy to think that but everything I want to achieve I fail at it, and the rest of the things, those that I don't care about, those I am talented at

I wish I had never been born so my parents and my brother aren't hurt at me killing myself
>>
How to love thyself
1. Get off the internet. Seriously. Come back when you're not depressed.
2. Start searching for a hobby. If you don't have any interests, start looking around for one.
3. Go to the library, get a book on whatever hobby you previously selected.
4. Start going for walks, doing pushups when you're not busy, and working on the aforementioned hobby.
5. If you fa, either try again, or try something new. Try to have fun with it. Eventually, you will start to acknowledge a self worth.
6. Get a job. If you have one, but it's shit, get a new job. This might take a while, but it will happen if you genuinely try.
7. Acknowledge what experience you have and what you succeed in. You don't have to be perfect, but in a sense, you will be.
8. Stay away from this place. You know how everyone talks about "they don't want to see you succeed"? 4chan is full of "them". People here want to tear you down and make you feel like shit because it makes them feel better.
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