Anyone else constantly told they were "special" and "really smart" all through their adolescence, only to get into college and realize they're really stupid? This fucking liberal parenting has ruined me. It makes me live with the expectation that I'm gifted, only to find out again and again that I'm worthless. And I don't fix myself because I'm so entitled. Look at me now, complaining on an imageboard, and who's gonna stop me?
My family still tells me I'm smart all the time. I'm expected to be the "brainy" one of my siblings for some reason. Maybe because I wore glasses or something? I can't even bear to tell them that I failed all my classes last quarter and they're gonna kick me out of school if I don't do well this term. I think maybe I'm intelligent, but it's purely intellectual and in all practical matters I'm completely clueless. I can read textbooks no problem and talk for hours with you about them, but I can't do any of the exercises without great difficulty. My sister's agreed with me on this, she's said I'm book smart but otherwise really stupid. I was supposed to complete some materials science research at this university and I didn't know what to do, any step of the way, no matter how much I read the literature. I had to get the grad student do all the work for me, then I just copied his research poster and took credit for getting all the data. Maybe that makes me management material?
What about you guys? Did you have liberal, hands-off parents who kept acting like you could figure it all out yourself because you were some kind of brilliant savant? My parents never even taught me how to ride a bike. I still have no fucking clue. It scares me watching people pedal on those complicated things, why don't they fall off? What if suddenly one of the metal things failed and the bike stopped and threw the rider facefirst over the handles, precious seconds of air time before he bites concrete?
I can half relate anon. I've been cruising through school and when I hit university it was pretty clear what tripped me up. Other people could study and I could not. My parents didn't really teach me the value of toughing it through things. They accepted me taking the easy way out by being smart and just learning things. When they heard I did well in math they didn't tell me to do more math. They told me I did well. Like our school system is good enough. My dad is a teacher, he should know.
On national admission tests I scored in the top 5%, got into my university and took math the same way I always did. I was never forced to solve a single problem. In group assignments people often told me I'd make a great teacher because I often found myself explaining things to them and they felt I was adequate I guess. But that doesn't help me really. Solving problems based on what you know is something you have to practice. And having been depressed for a really long time and suddenly getting my first F on a test I couldn't really deal with it. They made me grow weak when I had all the potential not to.
>It scares me watching people pedal on those complicated things, why don't they fall off?
Well perhaps we're not so similar OP.
if you're book smart but unable to achieve a 'common' task here's a tip from someone who used to be just like you.
Read up on it on it.
Every topic has been covered by man and the internet makes them all accessible to your fingertips.
Don't know how to get started on a paper?
Don't know how to properly research a topic?
Don't know how to take advantage of online databases?
>fucking google it
If you're book smart, then read a goddamn book
I hate being threshold genius, always slightly underperforming and unable to do anything that would "wow" or amaze anyone. Yeah, I was smart enough to get a 34 on the ACT. But I got rejected from all the Ivies I applied to, so it didn't even matter. I'm starting to lose interest in school. I'm just gonna end up in some boring office drone job. When I was a kid, I'd dream of designing airplanes and spaceships. Now that I'm a bit closer to getting employed, I can see that it's not gonna happen. Those jobs are reserved for people who go to Harvard, Caltech, and MIT. In fact, I got a pretty rude awakening when I was applying for internships and I couldn't even get one. I thought my resume was pretty nice, there was lots of experience and some cool projects I've finished. I was so sure I'd get at least one bite! And I got lots of interviews, but I guess there's something about me that puts off everyone once they meet me. Maybe I'm not confident enough or something. I don't know. Now I'm doing the internship search process all over again, and still not having much luck. My school's pretty big on internships, pretty much every student does one every year. All these other students can find jobs with no problems, so what's wrong with me? Who knows.
aced through primary/high school without any effort whatsoever, but as soon as i got into university and it started to get challenging, i started failing, hard.
i don't know, i just don't seem to have the willpower/patience/focus to try, or when i do try, i feel like i'm hit by some kind of a brain fog (or maybe i simply am very stupid), and it seems to be getting worse.
on some days i do nothing but lie on my bed and skip school. the worst part is that i had my blood checked this week and there was nothing obviously wrong, like hypothyroidism. i seem to be a failure in the making, but right now i'm spending the remainder of my energy trying to turn things around. soon enough i'm demanding to get another blood check and see if i'm deficient in some vitamins (due to a mthfr mutation or digestive problems something, for example), and in little more than a week i've a physiotherapist's appointment, and they're gonna show me how to start lifting (actually i'm just i'm too afraid to go to the gym on my own).
in the mean time, i'm trying to get through at least some courses and labs, but some are already lost causes, but i just gotta deal with it for now. maybe if a health problem is discovered, they'll understand since i was simply not in the best condition to study. i do fear that i'm actually just lazy, stupid and worthless and there is no cure, though.
I knew guys like you. I always felt bad for you. That weird combination of high expectations and no support seemed to just freeze the guys I knew like that.
I knew one guy; his parents were constantly saying stuff like,
>"Oh, he's so smart that the classwork bores him! He'd get straight A's if the school could actually challenge him."
>"We sent him to a Summer seminar for gifted kids and he did SO WELL!"
meantime, he's telling me he hated it.
There was one family - 2 boys and a girl. The parents were always putting the girl in pageants and model contests and demanding she be in the school play when she was average with nice hair. The middle kid, the boy, had 2 private coaches and was in everything baseball; they KNEW he was going to be a pro ball player when he was 5. Every minute of his day was all about sports.
But the oldest. Man. Those quotes were about him. He used to just flounder in class. he didn't ask for help because his parents were constantly telling him he was a genius and they just made excuses for him getting C's and B's all the time.
When the acceptance letters came I remember seeing him at a party just blasted drunk - his parents had applied for him to every Ivy and CalTech, MIT, etc. and he didn't get any of them.
I heard later that he went to the local state school and failed out, but didn't tell his parents. He told them some story that he graduated in the January term so there was no ceremony and had some fake diploma made and then got a job as a book keeper, telling his parents he was an accountant.
I should look him up, see if his parents ever found out
I have had a similar experience. College is just a frusterating, soul crushing mess.
I think maybe trying to utilize tutoring services may help a lot for the OP. Working through problems is shitty and you need to learn not just the concept behind a problem but how to tackle it step by step.
I have rather severe OCD and anxiety and depression. Getting started on schoolwork or a project is always a challenge. Sometimes you just have to go through the motions to really be able to push your way through something. Fake it until you make it.
Hell, I get better grades than most of my classmates yet I constantly feel I'm not good enough.
However, recently I just got blood-work done that discovered I have lyme disease. I had to go to a particular doctor to get a proper test as most doctors perform a really inaccurate test because info on lyme disease is shitty. I hope that after treatment some of my lyme disease related symptoms will lessen, but even then I'm sure school will be a challenge.
Consider that maybe a two year technical school will better serve you than four or so years of college. If you do really want to get a college degree, push through it. It's going to suck but overcoming the challenging pile of shit that is college is half of what earning that damn degree shows a potential employer.
>everyone in my family thinks I'm smart for some reason
>I'm actually lazy as fuck, I never studied in high school and always had mediocre to straight out horrible grades, I was even held back a year
>now my mother is wasting money on uni and a nice apartment for me while I spend my days jerking off and playing video games
I would study if I could, but I'm literally incapable of focusing for more than 5 minutes and exams give me panic attack