The former is especially important. Humans are very critical of themselves. We may become bitter after long of this scolding. This begins to reflect on how we treats others. So yes, we really ought to have more compassion for ourselves.
Hating myself is natural. Why couldn't I just try harder and be Chad? What's worse when you meet a girl who won't just tell you to fuck off they talk to you genuinely and make you hope. Like just tell me I'm a fucking nuisance already. People being nice to me is so fucking weird. I love this girl. I really do. Not the meme love I mean I love her. She's this cute sarcastic funny beautiful non Stacy. But why won't she tell me to fuck off after all this time? Out of pity it must be. So many better guys than me out there doubt I even cross her mind that way.
I'm pathetic OP. Just fuck my shit up famalam. Smeh tbqh fampai.
>>26405369 Hey, I'm a real person, and I'm saying it. Don't dwell in self pity. You are not alone, everyone feels worthless sometimes, that doesn't make things true. For the longest time I felt like a failure and a piece of shit no matter how well I did. I'm finally starting to feel better, and I don't want to go back. Pain and self-loathing only exist as long as you choose to feel them. I'm taking time out of my day to tell you not to give up. Seek outside help if you can. You won't regret it--I didn't.
>>26405377 And what will that accomplish? Pain is temporary. It's a state of mind. How you feel now in this moment isn't how you will always feel. Why end it all before you even get to feel a little bit of happiness, a little bit of satisfaction? Don't you want to know what it feels like?
>>26405669 >Pain and self-loathing only exist as long as you choose to feel them Humans aren't such resilient creatures that they can take one thousand hits without falling. Pain is a fact of life, you can't pretend it's not there. It should be acknowledged. What matters is collecting yourself after the fact.
>>26405695 Cliche or not--things aren't going to change on their own. You have to make some effort--scary as it is. You have value, why discount all of you're self worth? You don't have the advantage of friends or confidence--so you're gonna have to do a hell of a lot more than others if you want to feel a little bit of satisfaction. Believe it or not--even people who you think have it all feel hollow sometimes--happiness doesn't last either, but they don't dwell on it and try to move forward. They have every advantage, you don't. It sucks, but it's the truth, so smart with something small--and let your self feel some satisfaction, because you know how hard that little thing was to do--how hard it was just to get up in the morning, to go outside, to talk with a cashier, to take a walk, to make an appointment, to do anything different from the pattern you've fallen into. It's fucking hard, but if you don't take that tiny step, who is gonna do it for you?
Are you aware of how a star dies? I will become 10x greater than myself physically and socially, and then kill myself; somewhere as cold as my corpse will be. It may take years to happen, but I will die knowing I was the best version of myself.
I don't want to feel happiness, or love, or affection, or any of that shit Anon.
Attempting to reach it is what put me in this mindset in the first place.
>>26405805 That's totally true. What I'm saying is doing beat yourself up when you don't have to. Don't discount your efforts, because you believe you aren't doing enough. Not everything is as bad as you believe--take a step back and try to look at things rationally. People don't generally look at other people and think, "what a loser"--most people don't give others a single thought. Learn from the big things and move past the insignificant ones.
You are doing a good thing OP, you are right as well. How can a person achieve anything if they keep putting themselves down all the time, it's important for everyone to try their best and that means trusting in their own ability.
When a star dies, it first grows many times larger. Soon after, the star collapses into itself, forming a black dwarf, a neutron star, or a black hole. This whole process can take many years.
I'll become a much "greater" version of myself, and then collapse myself, so to speak. It's not like I've based my suicide off of the death of stars. I had this plan since before I even noticed the similarity.
>>26406372 >what's the point? To feel good and do things. Doing things also gives you stuff to talk about.
I think telling yourself that you're a good person is better than telling yourself that you're a shit person, which you are currently doing. You are capable, what makes you so ineffective compared to the average joe?
>>26406415 how can I feel good when I know it's a lie? I know I'm lying to myself. that doesn't help me at all, it makes me feel even more pathetic that I have to lie to myself just to function like a basic human being. I can't exist like that, I can't exist where I have to lie to convince myself that I'm not trash.
what makes me so ineffective? I wish I knew. but I've squandered my entire life. I'm 22 years old and I have nothing to show for it. no friends, no experiences, no hobbies, no interests, no passions, no personality, no accomplishments, I'm just a fucking loser that sits at his computer and cries and prays for an airplane to crash into his house so my parents don't have to experience the shame and grief of their son killing himself.
I want to be with people. I want to be normal. I want to have a friend and a wife and a family, but they don't want it. I'm not worth it. anyone who associates with me would be settling or torturing themselves. why would I want to inflict that on someone? I'm a fucking loser. life could deliver my soulmate to my front door and I'd probably still fuck it up and ruin things.
This is true, you need coping mechanisms. If you don't have good ones at the beginning, you learn and repeat until it becomes innate habit. Look at things rationally and think what does the future hold after this incident. If its most likely something bad, prepare for it straight away. You'll feel good just preparing.If it's impossible to prepare for then you need not worry beforehand and just face it headstrong since its out of your control and not really your problem (even though it concerns you) since you can't exert any influence over it. You accept that and move on.
You're probably a troll OP, but it's still nice to see the friendly messages on here regardless, even if they don't change anything. I'm not one of them, but some people would really appreciate the reminder after wallowing in a sea of their own misery.
>>26406526 >shame and grief of their son killing himself
You sound like a person who loves his family but you're incredibly insecure and think that you know how others feel about you - "shame", "torturing" and how you'll fuck up relationships. You need to chill because you can't predict the feelings of people you haven't even met yet. You obviously have the capacity to care so if you just allow yourself to be around people, they will see it too and feel good about themselves and about you so you're negative thoughts are unreasonable and you should just chill! Ease up on these stupid worries and then you can focus on things you enjoy, that's how you'll get interests, passions,experiences. It might take time but persevere.
>>26406526 >lie What you're doing right now is lying, by saying that you're hopeless trash when there are things you can do to change. Besides I think you've already realised that people lie all the time, it's a part of being a basic human being. Nothing is important but we pretend it is anyway because it feels better than sitting around doing nothing.
>my entire life 22 years is not too far gone and you choose to sit at the computer, that can be changed easily by picking up a hobby or something similar, just stay away from the imageboards. A hobby will give you something to talk about and share with other people, which will then help form a personality to which you form a bond with. If nothing interests you pick one at random and do it despite disinterest. Then keep going through them because if you keep at it long enough and manage to find other people, you will be able to share experience and their passion will rub off on you. Hell perhaps the possibility of making friends will be enough reason eh?
If you really wanted to be normal you'd take the steps to do so, even if you fear them. You have to make people want to associate with you, nothing is free for normal people.
>why would I want to inflict that on someone? because you're lonely and want to be normal which is a perfectly acceptable thing to want
>soulmate one step at a time first, worry about that later. That way by the time you worry about it, you will have hobbies and stuff to talk about to make it easier.
You've got to stop hating yourself because at the moment it's stopping any possibilities. You don't have to love yourself, just give yourself a chance.
>>26404796 >friend jokes around >don't know how to reply >reply in condescending way as not to like outwitted >just look like an ass and make myself unlikable I feel bad about it and have a clenching feeling in my gut
>>26406526 >>26406760 to continue I hate how society demonizes selfishness, I find those who do so are actually the most selfish of all. There is nothing wrong with being selfish, especially when nobody has got your back. Don't be afraid to desire, don't be afraid to have fun. If someone doesn't like it they can fuck off, because it isn't about them, you aren't their property.
Have you ever played an MMO? Life is kinda like that, you've got to grind in order to get to the good stuff. What you're doing is expecting to be able to take on a high level dungeon at at a low and then getting really disheartened when you die. Yes, you can't do it but that's only because you're expecting too much, you gotta take the necessary steps beforehand then you can do it. You have to grind to level and get skills. Start simple.
I started with hygiene because I was a dirty fuck and whilst I'm not the pinnacle of human cleanliness, I'm certainly more pleasing to see at least and it's not as embarrassing to smile even if my teeth are a little crooked. But even then, that can be changed and I'm saving up for some braces or surgery or something, haven't decided yet.
What you have there lad is a body waiting be used, it's your personal tool and no-one else can use it. So put it to use yeah? Also try listening to some feel good music.
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