>>26391754 lift some 5 pound dumbbells and pretty much lie to myself that I'm exercising and improving my body, then I go get 3 big mac's because 10 minutes of extremely light exercise can work up a mean appetite
>>26391754 I laugh it off and consider different perspectives on the situation that makes me angry. There's not much to be angry about when you realize everything isn't so black and white, at least for me.
>play vidya >fap alot >lift weights >drive around with no destination
most of the time I always see it as if its something I cant change then its pointless to be mad, but if its something I can change, I need to do something about it immediately. Its nothing related with girls though, its just errands, and juggling 2 jobs and other wagekek problems.
>>26394067 being in a cell really sucks, man. I don't know about you, but I like having the freedom to talk to my cacti and shitpost. it may not be as cool but this way I'm going to be a lot happier and live a hell of a lot longer. being angry all the time is fucking exhausting, too.
>>26396659 >grew up in poverty, ruined my childhood >abusive parents, ruined my childhood >night terrors/nightmares every night since I was 4 years old, constantly tired, have never known what it's like to have energy or be alert >had to raise my siblings, ruined my childhood >paraphilia, ruined my fucking life >pulled out of school, ruined my education >had to teach myself, made my education much more difficult than it ever should have been >had to work since I was 14, ruined my teenage years >mental illness, has been ruining my life since I was 16 >physical disability, has been ruining my life since I was 19 >military service cut short, plans for my future completely ruined >working a minimum wage job just to survive while supporting myself and another person when I need to be paying off debt to go back to school to get my fucking life back on track
Not to mention all of the assholes, dickbags and shitheads I've met over the course of my life that have tried to screw me over and stab me in the back, the constant setbacks I've had financially and medically, the complete lack of support from friends or family (I had none for a very long fucking time) and despite my best fucking efforts, the complete inability to change the most pressing mental health issues I have.
Anyone ANYONE in my position would be FUCKING FURIOUS
>>26396848 Sounds like youre half star being. We usually have shitty ass lives because we're the only ones that can hang. Trust me, im still going through the same bullshit. >Started since I was 6. > Im 21 now and still no further education than ged >working shitty job that pays a grand a week but 14 hours long, no time for anything. Literally anything. >have to support two assholes i dont call family because we're blood. >they never got their shit together so my only inheritance is the baggage they still will never pay off or correct because assholes >considered suicide, almost did it >before mum found me hanging, face purple as shit >Blacked out i guess. I dont remember being 5150'd or anything but having a fucking rad, avatar tla spirit world experience >found out about sacred geometry, the benefits of meditation, star maps of where we are and other beings, souls and how we're all interconnected >basically one big dmt trip >wake up and tell doctor what happened >eyes turn slit and smiles at me saying in due time. We're not all bad and we're not all good. >tells me im half reptilian and half gaian (Earth) based on my body temperature. Colder than most but im not the first >Explains why i literally have ice cold hands and other body parts >explains why i can see specific auras on certain people >im scared as fuck and threw up >He puts his hand on my head and i felt better the instant he put in on me inb4 he put his hand on the head of my cack >hes a healer among many others which is why hes a doctor
It gets better, anon, trust me. Meditate. Ill see you there, dude. Btw dont take the hate of 4chan so srs. They dont know the game yet
>>26398019 >They dont know the game yet What does the illuminati have to gain from hiding this information from us? What do you have to gain from telling us? How come every near death experience isn't like this? Are all doctors also 'healers'?
>>26398975 >illuminati >Implying >implying >implying as fuck
Its been happening but no one looks for the right things. A lot of bros are still stuck on being so scientific that it never bothered them to think about combining all branches of the faith system to actually put shit together
I'm pretty sure internalised anger is a big factor in my continuing NEEThood. There's nothing to direct my hate at except myself, but I plan on increasing my meagre exercising over the years so as to avoid alcoholism, overeating and drug abuse.
Sometimes I get to vent at someone who harasses me but I kinda wish someone would attack me so I could beat them until the emptiness goes away.
>things that encourage violent thought like fantasizing about rape or murder >violent actions like screaming, punching a wall >anything that will make you feel more rage
>understand what made you angry >take a break from whatever you're doing >do something healthy like jogging or cooking >think about your actions and feelings after you've taken a healthy break from the initial rage
>>26398975 Im trying to help people see what I see so we can make this Earth a better fucking place, thats my intent I dont care about the simple but destructive ego that so many people have, I dont have any egotistical intentions nor values whatsoever. Im not trying to brag, or say im better, i dont give a shit I just want people to realize that star beings are as real as the beings in the ocean.
Make fun of me if it drives your ego, idc, its not stopping me being the middleman
>>26399923 It helped at first, don't get me wrong, but as my mental illness worsened it no longer brought me the catharsis that it did before. Even when I was in practice or sparring with someone, I felt like I had to hold back, like nothing could give me proper relief. It became more of a frustration than a help and I had to quit.
My gym did have a very violent atmosphere, but that's what I liked about it. I had taken karate before in a very calm and peaceful dojo that almost exclusively practiced katas, very little emphasis on sparring until much higher levels, and that was even more frustrating than the MMA that I did.
It's nice to know that the activity isn't completely reserved for children. I started because my little sister bought a coloring book for me, it would make sense that she only thought to because it's "hip" right now.
I use human rationale to conquer my primal emotions. Seriously, though, I've started indulging in thinking up fantasy situations where I break things or people. There's one person in particular who I've had to live with for the past year that is the focus of most of these. However, I'd have to say that talking to random people about my issues is the best way to handle anger and stress. I'm afraid I'll act on these fantasies soon, though, the less I start caring about the consequences.
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