When was the last time your world was shaken?
For example coming across a situation or idea that had an influence on a monumental change in the course of your life?
It could simply information, or an encounter with a person.
When was the last time something had an encounter with you that changed you from one person to either a slightly better one.
Or worse one
I realised that i had a connection to a spiritual world that occupied the same space as ours but in a different dimension.
I can sense the presence of the occupants of that world in certain places and i can sometimes even hear them.
Even less occasionally, it creeps into my vision, and i can see the walls of a room moving, revealing yellow clouds which i assume constitute this world. If i'm not inside i just see the yellow clouds.
I'm not even trolling, and though i know no more about this world that i have explained, i'll try and answer any questions.
It was about...three years ago or so? Shit relationship that was heavily abusive.
Shocking to all it was a
womanwho taught me that to some, I'm only a wallet and a shoulder to cry on.
She has a kid, not job, no car and no clue.
I don't have a kid, but have a chill job, a car, my own place and a modest savings account.
I'm still wanting to be naive about love and romance. I still want to believe that I can be freely mushy and goofy without a care. But I know that I have to watch out and be careful for any signs of a woman being like that one. Especially if
tfw no fat neck roll to touch
Maybe the first time I did a large dose of mdma.
Goodbye anxiety, hello 100 new friends for the night. Of couse the feeling passed, but the idea that nobody cares how dumb you look in public never really did.
I don't suffer from dementia; my memory works fine, my phisical movements are as fast as ever, i never really get confused for no reason, and i don't suffer from and cognitive impairment
When you are lonely, after dropping out of university and doing something truly cringe worthy. For weeks I felt worthless, empty, lonely. It then hit me, nothing I will ever do in my life matters, I am nothing but a grain of sand on the beach. Every man is for himself. There is not a single action a human being will do that is self-less. Everything we ever did was for a direct or indirect benefit for our lives. The only thing that is left to for me is to live this life as happily as possible, and pray that heaven is real.
yea I'm going with mdma. that was the last profound experience I had, too bad it was like four years ago.
my first thought once I got high was 'holy shit, I was really depressed'
I haven't done it since because I don't like being reminded how miserable I am as a person.
>learning my twin brother died at birth
>learning my grandmother tried to kill my uncle, who had cerebral palsy, and herself
>having a complete mental breakdown where I was having panic attack seizures almost daily
>really analyzing my memories and realizing how little control I had over my development into who I am
>be 3-4 weeks ago
>be at dinner with family
>have 6 sister's and 3 brothers, most of my sister's have kids
>sitting on one end of the table and the kids are sitting at the other
>notice this guy a table over who keeps staring at my nieces
>neice keeps making eye contact with him
>notice her doing little stuff like bending over and exposing her chest and even kissing my other neice on the lips repeatedly while knowing the guy was watching
>eventually had enough and go over to their side of the table
>ask her why she was kissing her cousin
>She says what?
>I say, you heard me
>she then tries to play it off and give me an excuse
>I then say, why did you do it while you knew that guy was watching?
>her expression becomes nervous like she's been found out and she looks over at him a couple times
>just keep staring at her
>she asks why I keep looking at her like that
That experience fucked me up for days after it happened, probably a week. I just kept thinking how she knew the guy was watching her, yet she was doing this pseudo-sexual stuff. It was at that point that I realized she was lost, or at least lost to me. She'll turn into a degenerate slut and there is nothing I can do about it. It was then that I made the decision to cut myself off from my family. Too much of a drain on my psyche, I'd rather not know what happens. Also for days after I kept replaying the event in my head, wishing I had confronted the dude, shit really fucked me up.
Why not play something else?
Are you punishing yourself?
also reee git out norman
Its a decent shooter and it has really good art design. Also I get off on the racial stuff they put in like this
I would say the idea was already there from reading similar stuff.
Like you said, thinking about what I was like in the past, I didn't really know all that much.
There was only so much I could have done, even if I could have done better.
>When was the last time your world was shaken?
Probably years ago to be honest. I'm grinding through recently. I've settled into an acceptable routine and my life is acceptably boring.
>like an hour into the trip realize I do literally nothing
>realize that everything, even ideas and death, die
>freak the fuck out
>decide to kill myself in april
and now im just waiting
The death of my father, last year. It broke me for a while. It was one of those things, you see it in movies, you hear about other people having it happen, and you think it will never happen to you. And one day he's just gone.
His mother was a conniving piece of shit, and because my parents were divorced and I was only 17 at the time, she claimed that she was legal next of kin, assuming we didn't know better.
My mom was broke and couldn't afford a lawyer. We couldn't force them to turn everything over, so I had to get his car by acquiring the title and signing it over to myself, and then I had to essentially break into his house shared with his fiance, park a flatbed truck outside, grab a couple friends, and take everything I could find that was his.
Nothing I did was illegal but it sure fucking set them off. This painful inheritance battle and the manipulation attempted by his fiance and mother made me rethink human beings. I am no longer naive. I am stronger, but less tolerant. I lost contact with every single member of my extended family over this incedent, including my mom's family because they were useless and wouldn't be there for us in our time of grieving.
His funeral was a fucking joke. All 300 something of his "friends" got together on the beach for an hour dressed in stupid ass Hawaiian shirts he never liked, hand out leis because they're "beachy, like how he liked" and throw his ashes into the ocean before going off to a massive house party where they "celebrated his life" by getting fucking plastered. My family and my best friend's family were the only ones in dress clothes. Very few people approached us with any condolences. His mom's sister even had the audacity to approach me and talk about college, at my dad's fucking service. I still feel like bursting at the seams every time I think of it.
There is a quote I like that I came across while reading an article about a somewhat pretentious guy who every day takes a stick and draws intricate art in the sand on a beach. Every day the tide comes in, washes away what he created, and every day he does it all over again. The quote is "In the face of the knowledge of our demise, to express ones spirit and create beauty is the ultimate victory, the ultimate embrace of life." Ya life doesn't last, and neither will anything else, but with this knowledge will you give up, or embrace and create?
This past new years I was tripping on mushrooms and some chick started hitting on my friend. We invited her to hang out with us for the night, she ended up doing a bunch of coke and getting drunk as shit. At one point she looked me right in the face, as I was peaking on an eighth of fucking mushrooms, and said "you look like you're autistic"
Trip spiraled after that, thats how I started my 2016
I went through the same thing fairly recently.
To be honest, I think it just means she was the wrong girl.
I always told myself I didn't care about sex and that I'd wait until marriage, and this girl convinced me out of it, and all she ended up doing was making me feel like an object when she left me. A used up object.
I don't know how many people think the way I do on this, but I so badly just wish I had someone to hold. I couldn't care less about sex most of the time. I just want someone to be close with and someone who can be my best friend, not just my girlfriend. That girl left a void in me she could never fill.
I don't want a dog.
I want an intellectual equal, and someone who wants to be with me as much as I want to be with them.
I know there is someone out there like that for me. I've met girls who were close to that, and I've fucked up chances to talk to plenty of them. I don't struggle to talk so much anymore. I'll figure it out eventually.
Retards still stuck in their delusions that the material plane of existence is all there is to this world.
Don't worry about them my man, you know what's what in your reality