Jizzing in public thread

>>26369530
http://www.xvideos.com/video827519/the_rainmaker#_tabDownload

>>26369930
http://www.xvideos.com/video827519/the_rainmaker

fixed*

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How the fuck does this not have more replies? roasties are literally get cummed on by robots, I guess the normalfags really have taken over.

>>26370202
I was rather shocked and saddened myself to leave this thread for half and hour and come back to see 1 reply

I couldn't fap that stealthily. I could never bring myself to cum like that.

>>26370309
I would if i had diplomatic immunity

How illegal is this, exactly?

>>26370202

I think it's because this looks fake as fuck

>>26370587
Public masturbation is illegal alone, so you'd probably get that and some sort of sexual assault charge at the very least I'd imagine. I'm no lawyer though.

>>26370587
searched around a bit and could find nothing on the legal status of ejaculating on strangers

That's actually kinda hot desu

>>26370638
What about it seems fake? There are tons of videos like this on the internet, honestly doesn't seem that hard. Most people will ignore you because most people are timid af in public, and that's only the ones who notice. Jack off in your pants then whip it out and come on some roastie, then be on your way. Even if they notice what happened, they'll probably just be freaked and leave, not make a big scene.

>>26370799
>There are tons of videos like this on the internet
Can you link some? I cant find it :(

>>26369530

AYYYY LMOA THIS WEBM IS HILARIOUS

>>26370638
There are moderately good cumsharking vids I've seen but most are low skill asian fetish shit where some asian runs up and unloads blowing his cover with some camera man filming from behind a bush or hidden bathroom cam, really stupid shit and they are generally staged. This however looks pretty authentic to me.

>>26370817
http://xhamster.com/movies/1622783/cum_on_girls_in_public_compilation.html

I haven't checked out the "rainmaker" one linked above so I dunno if this is the same one

>>26370846
Haha it is. He came sooo much

>>26370846
kek'd pretty hard but just imagine if this became an actual trend, and a legitimate underground sport that takes real skill.

>>26370872
fuck nevermind it's been deleted, sorry anons. Was a good video though, like 10 mins long. Didn't save it either, shit

>>26370587
It's basically rape. How would you like it if some guy came up to your mom and just unloaded a hot steaming pile of cum all over her face?

http://www.xvideos.com/video547137/fine_hottie_gets_drive_by_cum_blast_

LLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLL

http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=912108985

fuckin only 1 min in and dying of laughter

>>26369530

you would be found guilty of public masturbation and sexual harassment at the minimum if caught. you would also be registered as a sex offender.

but yeah, "the payoff is high" right?

>>26370921

that cumshot was ridiculous doe.

>tfw you will never be able to spontaneously cum buckets for a random bitch on the street

>>26370974
>http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=912108985
LMAO this guy has BALLS. He just walks up to beaching ladies and cums right in their faces.

What a brave knight

>>26370974
what the FUG

http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=83605638

>>26369530

Holy fuck I haven't laughed so hard in months!

What if a gay guy did this to you? Wouldn't be so funny then

>>26371194

And here we go some female, reddit or other cunt ruining the fun.

FUCK OFF.

>>26371004
You have to get away with it to win. and yeah high stakes, but being able to stealthily release a river of boiling seminal fluid onto the target without being detected is a true feat of human ingenuity and brings with it a high degree of honor.

>>26371194
Of course not. I'm not attracted to men or cum.

>>26371194
I'm not some dumb bitch who thinks she's invincible due to her vagina, so I have a good awareness of my surroundings. Wouldn't let it happen to me.

>>26371194
What's your point? "This wouldn't be funny if it happened to you"? That's meaningless.

>>26371194
Good point, I'd rather they'd ask first so I wouldn't get my clothes dirty.

>>26370974
Can someone tell me why these roasties on the beach just look at him strangely, instead of running away or calling the cops? Do they just enjoy it ?

>>26371098

I lost it when he got a direct his on a womans ass.

Fuck it feels good to laugh.

>>26371260
>What's your point?

That contrary to the prevailing opinion in this thread, sexual assault isn't funny

>>26371393
>sexual assault
Would you say rain sexual assaults you too? Well, it's like rain, except cleaner probably.

It's just a nuisance to get off, nothing more. Back to tumblr, bitch.

>>26371194
It wouldn't but I don't care.

>>26371412
>Would you say rain sexual assaults you too?
Well, it's like rain, except cleaner probably.
Yeah I'm sure this will hold up in court. Ejaculating on some random person in public is obviously sexual assault.

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>>26370974
Lmao imagine this woman arriving at work and her cowarkers are like
>Miranda, there is this HUGE load of cum on your back
>No shit?
>Yea, really. Check it out

>>26371393
It can be, just like literally anything else can be funny.

Getting beaten up is featured in tons of jokes and comedies, and that's objectively worse than getting some jizz on your clothes. Calm down.

>>26371441
Just because it hurt your fee fees doesnt mean it is assault.

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>>26371194

Good thing I don't leave my basement

>>26371194


I wish It were possible I would fire out a slurry of blistering hot cock milk into this post and have eject out of your computer screen all over you.

>>26370974
At first I thought,

How the fuck do they not notice this guy getting ready to past them?

Then I realize,

oh yeah, they're all totally fucking absorbed in their normiephones

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>>26371393
> A femanon walks into a thread
> cuck asks 'why the cum all over your face?'
> all other cucks in thread proceed to further inseminate femanon until she is fully juiced.

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>>26371393
>sexual assault isn't funny

>>26371363
No kidding. He even announces his presence before shooting. They just take it.

I know Connecticut (USA) had to pass a law stating that this was explicitly sexual assault, after some college kids creamed on a sleeping co-ed. The worst they could have been charged with at the time was disorderly conduct, a low-level misdemeanor, because the sex assault statute had the specified element of unwanted bodily "contact".

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also just wanted to take a few moments to say thanks to all you great cucks who've participated in this thread. been very depressed lately this thread and the posts in it has genuinely made me laugh harder than I can ever remember, almost to the point of suffocation.

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>>26371898
/r9k/ doing what it does best

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>Get into this fetish a few years ago
>Decide that I absolutely MUST try to do it to a girl
>Spend a long time scouting for the best place and time
>Decide I should do it at the local McDonalds because people focus on the food and I can wipe cum on a girl who is sitting down after masturbating beneath the table
>go to McDonalds
>Order some food so it doesn't look suspicious
>go and sit down
>put the tray with the food on my lap
>I ordered 2 hamburgers, a Big Mac and large fries
>chose for specific reasons
>all very iconic McDonalds items so I won't be seen as odd, usually get a McFlurry with nuggets crumbled into it but that gets me people looking
>put the tray of food on my lap
>start trying to masturbate
>difficult as fuck
>tray is heavy and food is almost slipping off
>can't get hard
>end up sitting rubbing my crotch while occasionally grabbing a slipping hamburger
>start to worry that people are noticing me and getting suspicious
>look around
>decide I better eat something
>sit and eat everything on the tray to avoid seeming off
>realise I have no food and need to leave
>want to finish masturbating, a cute girl just walked in and sat down so I can wipe over her
>order some McNuggets so the workers don't think anything weird is happening
>take them to the toilet
>masturbate standing in the cubicle while balancing the nuggets in my spare hand
>accidentally cum on the nuggets and the floor
>realise I don't want to pick cum up off the floor
>decide only option is to grab a McNugget and throw it at a girl then run off
>leave the toilets
>take a cummy mcnugget, throw it at a girl, it hits her in the back of the head
>turn and run home
>obese, so I almost had a fucking stroke

Promise me you bros will NEVER try this fetish, it isn't worth it, the videos are staged

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>>26371979
I don't even care if this is fake, there are tears in my eyes
Oh god my sides

>>26371979
holy kek anon quality original post right here if you know what i am saying

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>>26369530
i love you guys and this thread so much.

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>>26371979
This is fucking gold right here holy shit

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>>26371194
For you :^) it is very original, very much so, and funny

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>>26371979

>order some McNuggets so the workers don't think anything weird is happening
>take them to the toilet

fucking my brain just melted and exploded with laughter when i read that part. also maximum kek at entire story

btw there is no way all those videos in those compilations are staged, fucking kids around in supermarkets, on the beach, on busses and trains and shit. god damn. sure some might be fake but not all, no way.

>>26372185
Dude... did you just cum on your iphone 5?

>>26372204
>he doesn't cum on threads he likes

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>>26372204
Yes, yes I did
oh my fucking god this captcha

>>26371979
also

>McFlurry with nuggets

This sounds like it has potential. Can any robots comment?

how the fuck anyone can eat mcdonalds

its trash

>>26372471
> how can anyone eat

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>>26369530
>You wouldn't believe what happened to me today
>Was on an escalator
>This fat freak with a video camera turns up
>Fucking shoots jizz on my leg when my back is turned
>Then stumbles away
ROASTIES BTFO!

>>26372471
McDonalds isn't trash, it's just cheap tasty food. The unhealthiness is exaggerated. Yeah, it's not good for you, but a burger from McDonald's is no worse (health-wise) than a burger from anywhere else, it's just cheaper.

>>26372471
people eat whatever the hell they want, fuck off back to /ck/

>>26369530
My fucking sides. It's stuff like this that basically reaffirms my faith in humanity. We are animals all of us. Jaded by the malaise continually perpetuated by modern society sometimes one has no choice but to shoot some hot semen upon a member of the opposite sex in order to let off some steam and have respite from this sustained frustration. Kudos to the good sir that managed to film this hilarious display as well for our viewing pleasure.

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>>26371979
>order some McNuggets so the workers don't think anything weird is happening
>take them to the toilet

>>26372727
I'm glad this post beared you many keks. someone should screenshot this thread.

>>26371979
>Iconic Mcdonalds items so I won't be seen as odd
Robot going full undercover mode

guys i've got an idea...

what if all the robots fill jugs/bottles with semen and then on one day just leave them everywhere

like open too, or maybe pour them on seats/office bathrooms etc

How do these cunts have no situational awareness? I don't even live in a dangerous area and I am aware of people around me and their movements.

>>26373392
holy shit just imagine walking up to an unsuspecting fem minding her own business and relentlessly squeezing a 2 Liter bottle teeming with rancid/rotten jizz into her face at full force.

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>>26373523
forgot to ad image

>>26371194
>wouldn't be so so funny then

who let you in here?

do you think i fucking care? i'd laugh my ass off and probably give him a high five.

>>26373760
I meant that in comedic sense not a literal butthurt woe4fems sense

>>26373868
i'm fucking blind and tired
> thought you were responding to >>26373523

>>26373584
we now need to get one of those fountain drink machines the add pressurized co2

thank you everybody for this amazing thread. let's make sure creaming becomes a thing

>>26369530
>IT'S JUST A PRANK BRO

hilarious and original

>>26371194
It would be shitty, but it wouldn't mentally scar me.
The worst part would actually be getting home without people noticing that I'm covered in cum

>>26373907
holy shit, and 2liter pet bottles can handle up to 200psi, just ad an electronically controlled burst valve, and stumble over into fems(pretend fallover/trip) and have them catch it as you drop it into their hands, stand back and active the burst valve or set it up with a timer or something then back the hell up.

I find these webms really funny but I've only seen a handful that have been floating around

What I really want to ask is how the hell nobody feels the sperm landing on them?
It leads me to believe that they're fake. (it's obvious to tell which ones are possibly staged but ones like OP posted are pretty much impossible to tell)
Anyway, how the hell DON'T they feel it? Are roasties just that stupid? Did the BBC just destroy all their nerve endings?

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>>26371979
fucking 10/10 im tearing up good job anon

>>26371194
I'd fucking laugh my ass off do you think im a little bitch?

Smoking Major Buegs

>>26371194
It would become funny in retrospect

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>>26371979
>>put the tray with the food on my lap
>>I ordered 2 hamburgers, a Big Mac and large fries
>>chose for specific reasons
>>all very iconic McDonalds items so I won't be seen as odd, usually get a McFlurry with nuggets crumbled into it but that gets me people looking
>>put the tray of food on my lap

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>>26369530
>thread dedicated to the objectively best fetish
>salted moralfag roastie gets btfo
>mccummies greentext

What a fucking thread. Textbook, lads

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>>26371979
I reckon you could've pulled it off if your execution wasn't so autistic. Throwing the nugget at her head? What the fuck were you thinking? Most of us would've stopped at the "taking the nuggets to the toilet" stage

nobody posting more vid though


i want to do this to a loli

>>26376472
>i want to do this to a loli

Disgusting. This is a respectable thread, don't bring your degeneracy in here.

We jizz ONLY on women above the age of 18.

>>26376544
fuck you normie blue pilled nigger

>>26376694
Take the white pill anon

>>26369530
Did not read all your shit, but i can tell you one thing. If i ever saw some cunt doing that shit i would fucking cut his tiny dick off in public with rusty knife.

Just imagine some motherfucking cunt with countless diseases cumming on your gf/sister/mother/whatever in public. How would that make you feel?

>>26376883
faggy white knight git out

>>26376883
Tell me Chad, what STD is transferred by sperm?

>>26376905
k
>Not wanting random disease ridden, no esteem cunts cumming on people in public
>White knight

>>26376914
No idea. Can i spit on your face when i meet you in public? Is that okay for you? I thought so you filthy cunt.

Seriously i have no problems with other robots being fucking disgusting in private but not with other people man, that makes me want to cut yall filthy heads off

>>26372388
Frosty and Nuggs are better

God I wish girls could do this and film themselves squirting some thick girlcum on unsuspecting civilians.

>>26376883
Lmao

I'm 6'4 and fit, nigger

Your manlet ass wouldn't do shit, and the women would probably like it, in fact

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>>26377127
>bragging about being ameriwhateverthefuck
Learn to use metric, like the rest of developed world.
Also
>mfw

>>26371979
Damn son, that is some covert ops type shit. You should be a navy seal or something.

>>26370587
Sexual misconduct at the least. More than likely something else - depends on the jurisdiction.

Almost guaranteed to have to register as a sex offender.

>>26377206
>can't convert units
Yuropean education

>>26377388
>Has no need to convert anything because majority of the world uses the correct units

I could convert but why? I dont really give a fuck about how tall you claim to be

>>26369530

my fucking sides

whoever did this is alpha af

>>26376883
white knight fuck off. This is funny as hell if someone did this to my girl i would lmao

>>26377828
>Being degenerate means its ok

Its not though. Its fucking disgusting and crosses the line even for me.

>hahaha some sickly hobo just cummed on my imaginary girl, loosen up faggit its all good and fun

k

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>>26376883

> Did not read
> buticantellyouonething.jpeg

maybe if you actually read all that shit you wouldn't be so butthurt.

>>26378017
>i am bored with my shitty life and hope more sick people do disgusting shit and post it online

Ok, how is that better or different?

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>>26378049

>i am bored with my shitty life and hope more sick people do disgusting shit and post it online
>literallyeverypostoncuckchan.png
Also I wanted you to read my elegantly crafted passage of text.

>>26378258
>elegantly crafted passage of text
Wow, thanks anon! It always brings warmth to my heart when someone appreciates my elegant wordsmanship, especially in foreign language.

>>26370587
Well since spitting is considered an assault I'm sure cumming is too. Bodily fluids with potentially transmittable diseases all.

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>>26378340
>nowthatsagoodboy.gif
+5 good boy points

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>>26371979
Fucking hell 10/10

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>>26371979
>cummy mcnugget

>>26378433
I pray that delivering neat little parcels of sweltering hot semen directly to strangers is never directly outlawed.

>>26374062
But she DID feel it. She moved her leg right after it happened, and then looked, and the touched.

>>26369530
The fact that he kind of "dances" around for a while after finishing the job is fucking hilarious

Oddly enough this is how I met my girlfriend.
I saw a girl sitting on the sidewalk, shaking and looking terrified, so I went up to her to see if I could help.

Some random freak had cummed on her in public and she was having an anxiety attack. I calmed her down and helped her with some paper, and well, that was one year ago and we have been together since.

>>26371979
>obese, so I almost had a fucking stroke

lmfao

>>26379298
>Next level c.uck

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>>26369530
I showed this to my gf and she drooled on herself

>>26379298

/r9k/: bringing people together.

http://xhamster.com/movies/3293541/beach_cum_on_milf.html

http://xhamster.com/movies/4889900/public_beach_cum_on_ass.html

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>>26371979
nice /r/4chan post, fagballs

>>26371478
"my"

you misspelled

>my mother's

>>26370202
ji hitotsu

Able to translate?

>>26379782
I think it's supposed to be "jiiii", the sound people apparently make when they stare at something.

>>26379550
god is that what an uncut dick looks like? I'm gonna throw up

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>>26379868
>uncut dick looks like? I'm gonna throw up