Who /shoplifting/ here? Post stories, tips, experiences, etc.

>Walmart
Place bags in shopping cart, conceal desired item in bag, walk out the store. Outstanding majority of items don't go off

>have bipolar 1
>manic and psychotic
>decide I need to steal this philosophy book
>grab it and start to leave
>the cashier says, "Hey! Put that back"
>sink my head down low, put it back, and walk away

Never shoplifted again.

>>26349105
Leo pls

>>26349105
its so fucking easy. i would take make up, put it in my cart, then i would go to a blindspot and shove it in my bra and walk out the store. did the same in mac and sephora, my friends always asked how i had hundreds of high end lipsticks. i stole bras in victorias secret by trying them on in the changing room, switching my old bra to the one on the wrack, and walking out in the new bra.

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>Sex store
>place dildo in my anus, walk out of store
>Doesn't go off.
>mfw

>>26349195
This works with groceries too if you mind the little sting

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I went through a shoplifting phase when I was in my teens. I was a timid, unpopular kid, so it was pretty much the only sort of rebellion I could pull off.

What I mostly did was walk items to the garden section, which was surrounded by metal fencing instead of solid walls, and slide the items through to the other side. Then I would leave the store and pick them up like nothing happened. Small hauls, but it added up in value. I felt like such a badass. That was a long time ago though. I'm a boring neet now.

>walk into best buy
>put tv in cart
>walk out the store to my car pushing the cart
>some guy yells that I forgot to pay
>I tell him I know
>drive off

the wagekeks can't do anything to you even if you are stealing, but they will still get in trouble with their bosses for the lost revenue, it is hilarious.

>>26349105
>aunt has worked as a manager for multiple clothing department stores
>tell me how the niggers come and take what ever they want
>shes not allowed to stop them because its policy
>she got fed up with some nigger land whale who has stolen multiple times
>Fat nigger tries to fight my aunt
>aunt punches her in the face and the nigger leaves the store
>she gets fired

>shoplifting
>2016
smash and grab where its at , just get a bike and a crowbar

My way.
>go to best buy or walmart
>wait outside and look for people throwing away receipts
>if their cart looked good i grab it out of the trash
>go to another location
>go inside and pick the most expensive items out from the shelves
>take them to returns
>leave with cash or store credit
Errtime senpai.

Haven't seen a shoplifting thread in a looong time, bump! More tips stories please, it's thrilling.

>be me 5 years ago at 14
>Under the age of being able to be charged with crimes here in Norway
>Shoplift daily for several hundrer kroner each time with my friends, one of which also shoplifted
>Go to different stores so as not to arise suspicion
>Also purchase an item every time i shoplift to avoid seeming suspicious
>Only steal candy, eating something like 500 grams of candy every day i obviously get pretty chubby
>Stop as soon as i turn 15
>Have an urge to start again

>>26349647
You can google some more, but this is what I got
>NEVER shoplift from Target. Don't even try. Target is loaded with security cameras, even in the parking lot. That's why people make deals in Target parking lots, because they are more secure than a bank's parking lot.
>Walmart is kinda iffy, it depends what area you live in. Try to find a way to get in the back room and take a pic of the computer that shows all the security camera spots. Some walmarts have huge computers that show every inch of what the security camera sees, others are super tiny.
>Local stores are the best to shoplift
>Usually if you squat, the camera won't see you
>If the workers accuse you of shoplifting, just drop it. Or if you're a good runner...
>You can find a list of stores that don't have security cameras (ex. bath and body works, hot topic, rue 21, etc)
>never try to shoplift with anyone around. not even a customer nearby. they WILL rat you out.

>>26349105
We already have a nigger feels thread

What I did in the summer was go to rite aid, and shoplift a bunch of advil and tylenol when no one was looking. Like I'd have a backpack with me, I'd be at the store at 3 PM, so it looks like I just got out of school, slide the whole shelf of meds into my backpack super fast, and then walk out. I'd do this to different rite aids so I'd have a shitton of meds. Then I'd go to the flee market and sell them cheaper than in stores, so I made a shitton of money. One summer I made $20,000.

I rack from the supermarket every time I go there, usually just small shit like expensive cheeses that I can casually slip in my pocket. No one watches the cameras in NZ supermarkets, and there are always blind spots anyway. You should pick up the item and carry it down another aisle to conceal it. I also rack cartridges for my fountain pen and markers to use for graffiti from the chain stationery shop.

Occasionally I do bigger racks, usually need to be drunk to pull it off casually though. My friend had a BBQ for his birthday and I turned up with about $60 worth of meat. He knew where it came from but everyone else was really surprised and suspicious because they know I'm on the dole :/.

>>26349382
Sounds like a pretty good scheme tbhfam

>>26349881
This is quite a good scam, have seen it done before. Just got to find someone dodgy enough to buy it

>>26349851
Giving you a (You) for being clever

>>26349105
>stealing
pathetic

>>26350027
Right? Who the fuck would buy discounted meds, they could be fake

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Didn't realize so many negros posted on r9k.

>>26350209
>I'm a good boy xD
Fuck off normie

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>>26349382
I used to do this at fast food/takeout spots. Everyone throws away their receipt usually, just grab one and come back a little later and be like "I ordered this with no onions/sauce/etc and my order was wrong and I didn't have time to come back til now and I couldnt eat it" 99.9% of the time theyll make you a new meal for free or give you a voucher for a free meal/item
I never tried it with bigger items at stores because I figured when they scanned the item you brought them to return from the store that you swiped a receipt for that they could tell the item hadn't been purchased. Or does it not work like that?

Just remember they can't say shit till you're leaving if you get caught sneaking shit into your pockets.
I like stealing batteries from target, i go in, get a bunch of shit till i can't carry it. Then, i stuff what i'm taking in my pockets, and go get a basket. I dump in all the stuff and make it look like i didn't just do that.
I've done it in front or cameras.
Don't have to worry about double As no mo senpai.

>>26350177
Nah if they're sealed in the original packs its obvious they're real and you've stolen them... Arab run dairies usually don't give a fuck about receiving stolen goods though

>>26349105
Was shoplifting for 6 years before I got caught from cctv when I was 14. Being driven home in a police car isn't fun and my parents grounded me for several months. Was worth every minute though for all the shit I got from it though and only ended up with a caution

I'm not much of a shoplifter myself (except 50 cents worth of candy one time when young, and I got caught). However, I knew a fella in highschool who would regularly skip class, visit the local strip mall, steal whatever he could get his hands on, and be back at school at the smoking section in time for the next break. I remember him frequently trying to trade 'Pot of Gold' brand chocolates, and stolen video games from blockbusters, in exchange for 'native' cigarettes. I remember some funny exchanges there

>Thief kid: Pot of Gold for ciggarettes anyone?
>Smoker kid: Hmm, well Mother's Day is coming up soon. I'll give you three natives, do we have a deal?
>Thief kid: Only three? How about kills on your current smoke as well?

Personally I have tried to distance myself from the sketchiness now that high school is over with.

>>26350368
>kills on your current smoke
Hahaha I love it when people hustle this hard its endearing

>>26350242
No, usually every one of the same item is under the same code for the scanners. It's not individual.
I've never done electronics but it's good for toys and shit that's not so big but worth some skrilla.

Never done it myself but I have a friend who regularly shoplifts from Kroger.
I have gone with him before and he will literally take shit and blatantly shove it into his coat pockets.
He also goes to the self checkouts and rings everything up as bananas.
He's been doing this shit for years and somehow hasn't got caught. I'm too big of a pussy to do that shit tho. Cameras are everywhere nowadays.

>>26350234

>I steal
Fuck off Tyrone

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>tfw always get a massive urge to do it but huge pussy so I never end up doing it

I have a feeling if I start doing it I'll never know my limits and end up stealing a shit ton and getting arrested

>>26349105
Daily reminder that if you get busted for shoplifting you will never have a decent job unless you open your own business. My HR department has a few "immediately in the trash" policies in regards to job applications and one is any felony or any misdemeanor that involves theft.

Had a brief period of shoplifting small items. Stopped after I almost got caught.
>go to a big store with my mate shortly before closing hours
>wander around a bit, eye some items
>find a blu-ray of some movie
>take it with me
>go to the clothes section, take a pair of pants and go into the changing room
>my plan was to pretend to try the pants on and hide the movie in my actual trousers
>get out of the changing room, me and my friend take a soda can each and proceed to the cash register
>I notice the security guards eyeballing us on the other side
>decide to go and put the movie away just in case
>turns out I was right to did that, as soon as we pay for the sodas two guards approach us, tell us to wait that they need to go check something
>I try to play it tough, say that they can't search us, they have nothing on me
>they say the've called the cops and they will search us
>one of the guards goes into the store to check something
>my face is all red, sweating like a motherfucker, heart pumping like crazy
>the other security guard comes back, whispers something to the one who stayed with us
>they say we're free to go
>I try to keep up my attitude and tell them "This better not happen again"
>we go out of the store and proceed to thank heavens

I think I was never so scared in my life. Even now I feel uncomfortable while typing it out and it's been like 5 years.

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I allways wear pic related when i go shopping and it works really good! I usually pick up a shopping basket when entering the store and fill it up with stuff i want. The big stuff like bread, milk and potsto chips i pay for. But i put all the smaller items like cheese, beercans and steaks in my backpack. I make sure to find a blind spot. Shuving stuff inside the backpack is really simple when you have a whole right behind your back. I have done this for years and never been busted.

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>Los Angeles makes you pay for plastic bags at food stores now.
>You can bring your own.
>Just put the most expensive items in the bag.
>Go to self check out.
>Scan the cheap shit.
>Leave without scanning the costly shit.

I've always just taken amall things that can fit in your hand.
Keychains at themeparks, batteries, candy, USB drives, some headphones etc.
Never got a rush but i did it to see how much i could get.

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Don't most stores have alarm things tho

So if I steal a cheese an alarm will go off because it's not scanned yet
like how do you put shit in your bag it will just start bleeping when you leave the store

>>26350918
Most stores in los angeles have started to put someone there to stop it already.
Everytime I go Target or Ralphs there's someone there asking to help me if i'm in another line.
I think some walmarts around here are still good to steal from around here. Self check outs are empty and if there's a person at the door sanic your ass out behind some people and ignore the walcuck if he says anything. He probably won't.

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Okey does this work in scandinavia?

>Get a redbull/beer
>Drink it up at home
>Attach joints and screws, turn it into a redbull container where you can store stuff in
>Wait until closing time
>Put it amongst the rest of redbull, then blatently "steal" it when security is looking
>Walk out of store
>Security tries to stop you
>Pretend to have autism
>Get tackled
>Scream like a retard while a friend of yours is filming all of it
>Police show up
>Notice its a custom openable can
>Sue security and store for assault

What do you guys think about this? Btw I have shoplifted for more than 8k but stopped for two years now. Yup, nothing but the finest oxe filet etc for me.

>picture sorta related, but imagine it being a redbull can

>>26350528
>blatantly shove it into his coat pockets.
>goes to the self checkouts and rings everything up as bananas.
top kek

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I steal food
>walk into McDonald's
>wait for someone to order food or drink
>they set it on the counter
>grab it and fill drink
>leave
I did this every day in high school and still do it

>>26349285
Kek'd
That's just so blatant it's hilarious.

>>26349285
>>I tell him I know
ahahahaha

>>26351035
The ones near me do it too but the workers are never at the self-checkout.

>>26349217
I used to do the exact same thing.
After a while, they closed the doors to the garden area so I couldn't access it anymore.

>>26350694
Same, I get nervous just reading it.

>>26351195

so if you get caught you can just say you thought you scanned the item.

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i put my bag under the child seat when i shop and then id put small stuff like makup or just somthing i want in the child seat and it would "fall" into my shopping bag,only once got caught and i pretended to freak out saying im sorry it must have fallen into my bag and i got away free

This is a really interesting, is there a website or something for shoplifting stories?????!?!?!? plsplspls

>>26351082
made me kek hard, I imagine some skinny kid with a hoodie screaming hysterically while being tackled by security

although I live in Scandinavia and I've never even seen a security guard in a shop

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>>26350234
Wow you're a nigger, probably not even black. Just a nigger.

>lel such a rush
>thrilling

Get jobs you fucking faggots.

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Me and my friend shoplifted like absolute madmen when we went to a fishing shop and stole shit for probably 200$ or more. we used to collect those gummy fishes you use as bait. We didn't even fish but they were fun collecting. We also scammed a guy in school who was a fishing autist who showed us his collection. I still have his fishes at home.

It ended when I brought my weird friend who smelled like wet dog and never wiped his ass who said loudly "are we going to steal them yet anon". I never went back ever again. My friend started acting all tough and pressed him up against the wall and beat the shit out of him too. Good times.

>>26351575
u mad wagekek
original

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I'm too pussy to shoplift, but I do "steal" food and drinks from places if you can even call it that.

Mcdonalds is busy? say you didn't get your drink/bakery item and they'll just hand it to you. Someone call out an order? say it was yours and they'll literally just give it to you without checking the receipt if they're busy enough.

The movie theater charges $5 for drinks? sift a clean looking cup out of the garbage (rinse in bathroom if necessary) and then tell them you dropped the cup. they'll give you a clean one. if your theater offers refills on popcorn, do the same with bags. they'll give you a new bag if they're like my theater.

part time workers literally do NOT give a shit. i don't know why people pay for fast food.

>>26351589
I mean, my normal friend beat the shit out of my wet dog smelling friend. I also played a blowjob anime game in his house when his brother was next to us (he was 12 at the time) but because he didn't know me he didn't tell his parents. Instead wet dog friend got the blame.

>my lols working as a store assistant
>kid tries stealing, he's a nigger
>force him downstairs and make him clean the staff toilet
>his mum turns up and says I did the right thing

hee hee

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>>26350708

Hmmmmmmmm. I would have thought any felonies and misdemeanors involving assault and battery would be more of a dealbreaker

>>26351112
>>26351611

The fast food method sounds good, but what if the person who actually ordered the shit sees you or a coworker notices you didn't notice anything? You'd probably be kicked out.

>>26350958
this is correct. wtf are you people talking about, if you hid shit it would go off

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I scam people on the Internet and I'm trying to come up with an idea for kickstarter to get a few thousand bucks. Problem is that the money may be taken away by Kickstarter if they see it's not going to be made, which means I'll just have to make a shitty game instead. Going to pay a few shills to shill on leddit and /v/ and watch it grow.

>>26351082
Norfag here, never seen a security guard at a shop. The alarm will go off if its not scanned, but if you buy a smaller item, you can play it off as something didnt get properly scanned. Worked for my friend. Usually clerks wont bother checking you.

>>26351611
I work at McD.

There is litterly nothing wrong with taking food from us. I was raised to eat all the food on the plate, never throw food unless it carries a severe health risk, say old shrimp.

We throw away tons of food on a normal day, after 7 minutes its protocol to throw it away, we can even legally give it to people.

So it's ok, its good that someone has use for it.

>>26351662
People are really meek when it comes to ordering food. When the order, lets say, 1 big mac meal, comes out it's common enough to be anyone's order. If they see you go for it and you're casual enough they literally won't do anything.

Note, I only do this when it's the lunch rush. Otherwise the cashier would remember who ordered it.

>>26351707
Im talking grocery store. Also most shops have security during closing who dicks around with the metal door

>>26350958
at most none high end stores they dont have alarms

>>26351755
all shitty stores are lined with cameras here.

>>26351723
The problem is that we're trying to take OTHER people's food. When I worked food service I would give away a lot of shit too though. I never understand when employees are so stuck up. My corner didn't have cameras though, so there's that.

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>>26349105
I've done undercover loss prevention at Macy's and uniformed security at Best Buy. Seriously Macy's is the last place you want to steal from, we're one of the few store chains that uses handcuffs if you put up a struggle. Shove me? Congrats, you are about to be throw into the floor to be handcuffed. The security room has 6 CCTV screens that can watch 30 cameras at once, not to mention we have over 100 cameras (three floor store btw) I was the only girl so I was a key weapon for fitting room threats.

>follow shoplifter into the fitting room literally tip toeing
>hide in a stall, squatting on the bench
>WAITS 45 MINUTES FOR THEM TO FINISH TRYING ON CLOTHES

First apprehension this lady on drugs tries to steal Michael Koors and Coach brand shoes. She switched them with the pair she was wearing and put some in her bag but gets caught, decks my coworker square in the face, and gets arrested to be brought into our office. I pat her down and dump her bag on the counter (with needle proof gloves), and of course, there are heroin needles in her bag.

>"Excuse me, what's this?"
>"that's my insulin"
>"then why is it brown?"
>"it got dirty on the inside"

TOP KEK. Seriously I have so many stories from Macy's. Even if you get away with stealing, your face gets screenshotted and emailed to other Macy's in the area. Also be careful because we set up employees to steal and it works often

>>26351853
do any of them have cameras INSIDE the fitting room? that's illegal right?

what stops me from stealing an expensive pair of underwear and panties if I bring a cheap one from home? (i'm not a girl, don't london me)

>>26351853
>set up employees to steal

Cunt, you probably set up coworkers who were so nice and friendly to you and ruined their lives

>>26351916
It's illegal but we have ones that are right outside the doorway so we can see what you have in your hands when you enter/leave.

If you steal underwear we'll catch you. I chased a teenager down the perimeter of the building for stealing a pair of Calvin Klein underwear out of the package.

>watch them go into the fitting room with a pack of underwear
>leaves fitting room with a ripped open bag of underwear
>one missing and nowhere to be found
>areyoufuckingkiddingme.jpg

The police will usually take care of any clothing that you're wearing and refuse to take off.

>>26351985
Sometimes when I go into fitting rooms, i'm able to hide an article of clothing underneath another and say that I only have 2 instead of 3 items.

If the employee falls for it, does that mean it's okay to take? is there some security wizard looking down at me still?

>>26351853
Me and my friend always did the switcharoo in the dressing room

>friend is black
>take pair of summer jacket
>i wait in stall
>he tosses it under, i put in my sidebag
>friend stays in dressing room for 15 minutes while i'm already outside getting snacks
>he attempts to leave, some cunt asks him to show his bag, he refuses
>they force him into backroom
>gets involved with media, picture of him and his mom, and recieve retribution
>we laugh our asses off

Those were good times

>>26351853
>handcuffs
>arresting people
How is that even legal, you're not a fucking cop lmao
fucking America I swear to god

>>26351922
They shouldn't be stealing, but it has to be done. It weeds out the dishonest employees that may steal when we're not looking. I used to work in the lingerie/pajama department and looking back at it I was set up A LOT. I have a habit of looking at the cameras. Is randomly find a watch by my register or some fancy chocolates, but I'd return them to the right department. Some employees sneak it into the bag and try to steal it.

>>26350958
That's only if the item has a security beeper on it which is only on expensive items and alcohol bottles.
Basic shit doesn't matter.

Also to the people saying they can steal TVs and shit and they can't chase after you...
Sure you got away but your face is on camera for sure and the cops can track you down nowadays using that shit.
Also you will never be able to shop at that store again so you better hope that shit is not in your hometown.

>>26351922
Well she's a woman after all

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>counterfeit legit coupons to save me cents on ice cream
>3 years in prison and 2 felonies

>shoplift hundreds of dollars
>pay a fine, a few days of community service, and its off my record

>>26352019
There's a five step process to catch a shoplifter, if you're missing one then you can't catch them because shit like that can happen.

>watch them enter the store
>see them select the item
>watch them conceal it
>keep observation on where the stolen object is (did it stay in their bag or did they chicken out and dump it?)
>wait for them to try and exit

We do find people trying to pull that kind of scam

>>26352143
Lol sucks2bu

My Wal-Mart has shit cameras. Every few weeks i went there and got $50 worth of hygiene products by just stuffing them in my backpack.

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>tfw bus system goes off an honor system
>you're suppose to buy a ticket but they don't check when you get on the bus
>sometimes officers patrol and check tickets but rarely happens
>lost my bus pass one day
>figure what are the chances of getting caught, i haven't seen them in months
>they fucking show up to check my ticket
>$140 fine

F U C K THIS ISNT FAIR THIS ISNT FAIR THIS ISNT FAIR

I PAY THE FEE EVERY DAY EXCEPT ONE DAY AND THIS FUCKING HAPPENS? kill me please

>>26352167
Never been caught you cuck.

The most easiest thing to spot are loss prevention cucks.

Just looking at you for 0.01 sec and I have already identified you.

Still not sure? Walk fast around the store, if cuck prevention suddenly cross store, you have a confirm. We had a cuck follow us once, pretending to talk on the phone lmao, met him outside far away on the parking lot and spit on him.

Also a girl who drove up to store, did her pretend shopping, then came back etc.

You guys are super easy to spot and legally you cant stop us if you hadnt had visuals at all times, why its good to walk across store since you cant prove us putting back items.

>>26352026
We're using handcuffs to detain them so they don't hurt us or themselves, it's 100% legal. I think we should handcuff all shoplifters because I don't want to wait to get my nose broken before I find out the person is hostile

>>26351985
>>leaves fitting room with a ripped open bag of underwear
why bother being civil about it? i feel like you can run in, grab your loot, and run out and get away with a blurred face on camera than actually being sneaky. those things record at like 12 fps.

>>26352257
Fuck that. Here in Europe (at least in my country) no one but a cop can as much as touch you.

>Be on schooltrip
>Visit some far off small, but popular summer location in semi-smaller society
>Sun is shining bright, little slice of heaven, near the docks, beautiful
>Find a freezer in the middle of the road sorta
>-Pick a Fish- Put money in plate-
>Ahh society is still good and honest
>We end up stealing all the money and fuck off

Thats what you get for trusting others.

We also went to church, and there was a sign in diary, dating all the way back to 1920. We ended up drawing dicks on the earliest pages.

You could litterly see the handwriting going from pure excellence, to trash over the generations.

>>26351922
>my co worker made me steal
jesus you people are the worst, do you have no self control?

>>26351853
Based.

>>26351723
>after 7 minutes its protocol to throw it away
seriously? ive heard stories of other places doing this too. thats absurdly low. buffets leave shit out for hours and its just as fine.

>>26352143
>counterfeit legit coupons to save me cents on ice cream
>3 years in prison and 2 felonies
Probably because that shit is considered fraud and the state will fuck you up the ass for that shit.
I always wonder how many sorry fucks from /b/ printed out those stupid fake coupons and got busted.

>>26352308
You sound like a angsty faggot

i work in a supermarket and for a few weeks we thought there was some sort of shoplifting maverick stealing from us
all the spirits have tags on them so you they set off the alarm, but he was leaving all these empty bottles in the store with the tags still on
we assumed he was emptying all this vodka into another plastic bottle and then leaving. 250 bongs plus of vodka later we figured out who he was so we started keeping an eye on him
turns out he was just going to the quiet bit in the shop, downing the bottles whole and then putting them back. he got caught and he was so out of it we had to carry him through the back despite him cooperating with us

>>26352349
there's grand theft and petty theft, but fraud is basically all under the same umbrella. the poor dude that started that trend is just now getting out of prison

>>26352377
Laughed heartily IRL. Poor guy

>go into store
>pick up chocolate bar and cold drink
>walk to back of store
>empty the bottle/can and eat the chocolate
>leave the wrappers and bottle/can, usually under a pile of shit or behind some other merchandise
>walk out of store casually without paying for anything

does anyone else do this

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Whenever I'm out like going to the movies, hanging around, or want a snack I just stroll into a CVS or Walgreens, pick out what I want, and leave holding the thing plain as day. I've been doing this for five years and only got caught twice with no real repercussions. If there's a manager watching the floor or lack thereof you should be careful. But if it's all wagies who don't give a shirt or are busy, you're golden.

>>26349126
What if an item does go off?

>>26352888
Just check to see if there's a tag on it.
Most expensive items like electronics have them.

>>26350368
>>26350425
>kills on your current smoke

What does that mean? Yeah english isn't my native language.

>>26352804
> walk into grocery store
>go to the refrigerated drinks
>open a 4l thing of juice
>take one big gulp in front of a bunch of people
>close it and put it back
>walk out

>>26353030
by finishing something you "kill" it. thus the last few drags of a smoke are kills

>>26353258
Ok that was more obvious than I thought, thanks.

>>26352026

Technically it would be legal in most countries to do the same but you need to know your legislation inside and out.

Say UK, not illegal for any person to own or carry handcuffs wether in a public or private place.

If you believe someone is commiting an indictable offence such as theft then any person can arrest that person without warrant.

And to go with the above any person may use such for as is reasonable in the circumstances in the prevention of crime or in effecting or assisting in the lawful arrest of any persons unlawfully at large.

The legally owned handcuffs would be reasonable for for a legal citizens arrest.

Again though, you're going to be the one stood infront of the judge, which is why literally no one does it in the UK.

is it possible to shoplift at big name supermarkets like publix?

>>26352026
It's not legal, I'm also a security guard and legally there are like 3 situations we can use restraints otherwise it counts as illegal arrest
Same thing for stopping someone and not letting them leave, that's illegal arrest

Basically we can kick you out but can't make you stay, most people though don't know the law and freak out and become compliant

Security bot from above
My company has contracts at sites all over the city from wal marts to hospitals and not only do I take stuff from work but so do all the employees of those places
Over the years I must have taken thousands in office supplies, food, and electronics

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>tfw live in niggerland
>tfw all supermarkets have more security than our prisons
>tfw im too honest to steal from small stores because its just not right
guess ill never have free shit i guess.

>>26352282
Over here (NL) ANYONE can make a arrest if they catch someone red handed. So that includes security in shops, if they catch you stealing, they can arrest you with violence if needed. They only need to hand you over to police as quickly as they can

>>26352308
You're a faggot loser.

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This one time when I was a kid I stole a piece of candy from the canteen at a basketball stadium.

>It was in full view of everyone
>Had to be lightning quick
>Pulled it off
>Felt a little bad afterwards

But holy fuck the RUSH

could someone tell me if this would work or not

>wear winter coat
>go into store
>steal something and put it in coat sleeve
>when walking out stretch your arms up as you walk by sensors

would it still go off?

>>26349105

I never got much of an adrenaline rush from it as I knew I wouldn't get popped for it. But I did get a good rush off of all of the whipits I was jacking

>>26354428
it's not gonna set it off as long as you clear the sensors
but ya see there are people and you look obvious as fuck

>>26351575
why get a job if i could just steal shit though? i don't really care if you think im a nigger anon, thats not gonna stop me lmfao.

I wish I could save all that sweet five finger discount cash, but thanks to my useless fucked up brain, I have actual kleptomania and I have to constantly agonize to not do it.

Because if I take even one thing, the whooole fucking disorder's gonna come back and I'm gonna get arrested for trying to smuggle out 87 sharpies.

Thanks genetics/nature in general.

>pick up a few bras in Victoria secret
>go into the dressing room
>put one of the bras over the bra i'm already wearing
>walk out of dressing room, store associate takes the bras that i "won't be buying" today
>smile and tell workers to have a good day as i walk out

piece of cake

>>26349292
Your aunt is a dumb ass
>taking a punch for a million dollar corporation

>>26351611
>The movie theater charges $5 for drinks? sift a clean looking cup out of the garbage (rinse in bathroom if necessary) and then tell them you dropped the cup.

Lol, you are a thief, and a crusty one at that.

>>26354590
Actually, correction: I wouldn't get arrested because I used to be soooo fucking good at it.

God damn it I own shoplifted lamps.

I miss being a shoplifting giganigger.

But give it one inch and I'm gonna get all my other compulsions back too, and I'm not ready to be the guy who fucking slaps his ear every ten minutes again.
Gjhrg

>>26349800
Nigga I stole hundreds of pokemon cards from target when I was like 7.

>>26354590
>implying kleptomania is a handicap
Its a genetic advantage.
But the jews won't let you steal from their wallets of course, so they label you as the thief while they steal the lives of the common man.

>>26354428
If you're tall enough the sensors won't detect it, but everybody will know what you're doing.

>>26349285
>but they will still get in trouble with their bosses for the lost revenue
no, we really don't

>>26351614
You and your friend sound like sexual deviants. Excellent.

>>26354750
I can second this, we just kinda sit there and watch, talk to each other any how obvious all your amateur changing room lifting shenanigans are, and at the end of each month we get a loss report and say "huh, that sounds about right" and move on, manager included.

There's something in the manual about trying to be cloyingly nice to obvious shoplifters to scare them, which I have done for giggles maybe twice. It really does make them go white in the face and stutter everywhere.

But it's more "it would be nice if it happened less", not "it's unsatisfactory if it happens more".

>>26352257
All of you are faggots

>>26352119
>Also you will never be able to shop at that store again

i highly doubt they would remember after a few months

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>>26351853

>mfw back in high school my friends must have stole $10,000 worth of cologne from Macy's alone

Lel get fucked wagecuck

>>26351662
At the mcdonalds in my city they don't just put the food on the counter and fuck off, they call out the order and whoever ordered the food instantly walks up to take it. Usually they're waiting right by the counter as well so I'm not sure how the fuck you would get that to work.

I used to steal a ton when I was a teen in NZ only got caught once and still got away with it because the guy let us go (me and a black friend)
Also got away with at least forty home invasions because I'm from a small town where people don't report it and all we took was alcohol.
If you've never been to NZ it's a good place to steal from people.

>>26350958
Small items dont have a security seal on them. Only items like razors, batteries, hair dye etc etc. Mostly personal care items have them.

any anons work in a supermarket? whats the security situation like? is it just cameras and those things that beep if you take items you haven't bought through it? i forgot the name
just wanna know what I'm up against if i go through with shoplifting

>>26355658

Just don't do it. Technology has advanced to the point where they can ID you from their CCTVs by running enhancing software on you and as you know cameras are getting higher and higher in the megapixel department so CCTV pics are getting clearer and clearer. It's almost at the point where software can make your motions out and catch you shoplifting before a human eye can and alert the humans. Especially in big stores.

>>26355285
Most important thing I learned from working retail: employees have fucking object permanence.
We remember people.

You'd think that with hundreds a day, you'd start to filter people, but you don't. Every face is exactly as memorable as it normally is, every single one of them, and obviously the ones that you know are shoplifters.

>>26355899
honestly i was thinking of doing it at night, sneak in through the air vent or something not now though, cuz too fat
as long as i leave no trace would i even get caught? is there a security guard that wanders the aisles? are the cameras infrared? dont have the guts to do it in daylight

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>Put loads of organic sunflower seeds in bulk bag
>Write down regular sunflower seed code on the tag instead

I could hardly contain myself at the cash register.
I got those fucking normies.

>>26356173
>sneak in through the air vent or something not now though, cuz too fat
ayy lmao chill with the hollywood

>>26349285
Your face on their camera feed has been sent to the police and all other surrounding retailers. Trust me, I've worked in AP for retail. You're fucked eventually.

I got caught shoplifting from steam

>>26354725
They don't have time to waste with kids stealing $2 cards. But I've worked for Target and that anon is right, they are always watching. So much so that the AP guy himself at my store got fired for stealing.

>>26349105
Here's a trick I give to you all for boosting all the comics and magazines you want, with no risk whatsoever. Go to a large chain convenience store and grab one of the newspapers they keep near the door. Browse through the comics and magazines and put whatever you want in the middle of the newspaper. Now here's the clever bit: put the newspaper back. Browse around and buy something, go to the cash register and pay, then add, as if you're just thinking of it, "Oh, and add a <name of newspaper>." Then grab the newspaper you filled with stuff on your way out.

It works every time. The only problem I've ever had is a couple of times other people grabbed my newspaper first and got a nice treat when they got it home.

On a similar note, you can get a reasonably nice, very cheap dinner at 7-11. Get a Super Big Gulp Cup, pay for it, then instead of filling it with pop, fill it with chili, cheese sauce, onions, and hot peppers from the condiment area. It makes a passable chili, and you get a huge quantity of it for almost nothing.

I've also had luck with switch sandwiches and subs out. The deli case is right next to the microwave, usually. Buy the cheapest one, pay for it, then go back and swap it out with whatever you want before you microwave it.

>>26349997
Jesus your scum what part of nz hopefully not Auckland I don't want to deal with your bitch ass

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>>26356535
I remember having literally 100 + packs of 5 Gum from stealing them in an icy drink

>>26356624
I used to do that many years ago, but they switched to transparent lids, presumably to stop that very thing.

>>26356535
i did this to a lesser extent
i just bought whatever cheap bread there is and pay for it then covered it with a fuck load of cheese and chilli

>>26356798
You can do the same thing with a bag of Doritos. Fill the entire bag to the top with chili and cheese.

>>26351650
Surprisingly, no. Those are all kinda situational, and they don't know the circumstances. Stealing is the dealbreaker, they don't want people taking stock.

>>26356918
i did this as well
good times

>>26349743
Fuck, food is the easiest thing to lift and the one thing you can always use a bit of. Part of the reason I stopped was the weight gain once I really didn't need any more makeup or low-end electronics.

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>tfw poor NEET that wanted to forget his bad life
>tfw stole four 30-packs of beer a week for eight years straight
>tfw got caught twice and both of the charges were dismissed

say what you will but i'm a man who'll never want for drink

>>26351611
The movie drink one works out sometimes, but since I spend like 8 hours a week there doing the same shit and seeing free movies, they're kinda catching on I think

Does everyone steal on this board?

>>26357279
Everyone steals period.

>>26356918
It's not even stealing, it's just a great stoner meal.

>>26357212
That's a lot of fucking beer, what's wrong with you? Fat cunt.

>>26357347
oi u fokin w0t m8 cheeky buger i swer on me mum m8 ill shag ur dog innit bloody wanke

>>26357324
*They* consider it stealing. I bought a container of nachos and filled it so high with condiments that I couldn't get the lid on. On my way out of the store the manager demanded that I hand it over. I told him I'd already paid for it so no, I was not going to hand him my lunch. So he blocked the door to prevent me from leaving and I took a charge at him. He jumped away before I hit him. Nachos are srs business.

>>26357590
You are a crass boor and a luddite.

>>26352308
>We also went to church, and there was a sign in diary, dating all the way back to 1920. We ended up drawing dicks on the earliest pages.

kill yourselves

I used to steal normie bucks from jocks while that were at football practice. It was so funny to hear them bitch during class the next day.

>>26357590
you, sir, are a hero

>>26357878
u kil yourselfo relative

>>26358051
Joke's on you, I think about it every day

Be buff and shredded as fuck.
Walk in clothing store.
Try on clothes.
Walk out.
Security tells me to stop.
I keep walking.
They do nothing.

Lmao.... People are no different from animals. They know when someone is physically stronger than them

>>26349105
never shop lifted but my brother made me help him one time if that counts

he tried to get me to do it again but i said no

kek, he got cought red handed that day

>Be 12
>ride bike to store with friend
>he teaches me how to steal candy
>pump ourselves up
>go in store
>he walks over to the candy
>loads up
>walks out
>chink owner is watching me now
>holding 1 5 cent candy in my hand
>he stands beside me
>give him a nickle and walk out

>>26359260
kekkels

>>26351082
What the fuck? You snow niggas are something else

>>26352026
It is called a citizens arrest. Canadians can even do it.

>>26359523
The rules are strict for a citizen's arrest. You can't restrain or restrict a person's movements unless there is an immediate threat to someone's safety. Some jurisdictions also include a threat to property, but not all. The way a citizen's arrest works is you tell the person she or he is under arrest, and they must stay there until police arrive. If the person leaves, she or he has committed the crime of escaping custody. (Of course, you can't just arrest anyone; if you do an arrest without justification, you can be charged with false arrest.)

>7 years ago
>teenage me
>some friends and I were running around the mall being obnoxious teenage boys
>go into a clothing store and start touching everything we can't afford
>I trt on a hat to see what I look like with it on
>nice
>fuck around at mall for a couple more hours
>driving home
>looking in my rear view mirror reflection
>notice I'm wearing a hat

And that was my first and last time ever shoplifting.

>>26356173

Heard of motion detectors, guard dogs? Come on. Also, if the place has decent security and you get in through the air vent they're going to know something is up and you'll be trapped. Of course, I don't know the layout of the place.

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I work at a grocery store and I'll give all you guys a heads up. Almost everything in the store won't go off in the beeper. It's basically only alcohol and expensive cosmetics. The things that go off have those security labels like pic related. Everything else is fair game. Just watch for cameras and loss prevention. They're plain clothes and usually have just an empty basket and are looking at people and random shit. Don't worry about employees they rarely are paying attention just make eye contact, smile, and don't act suspicious.


Sincerely, a disgruntled wagecuck.

Used to do this a lot as a kid but that was long ago... Heh

>>26349195
this, but pillsbury grands at vons

I used to steal mostly candy, drinks and ice cream, or just random stuff from the grocery store. I probably over my lifetime stolen over $1400 worth of stuff over a 2 year period until I got caught. Though it was really fun it was reckless and could've gotten into shit. But I didn't so no ragrets.

>>26349172
I want to call you a faggot but mines probably worse
>be me
>no excuse
>decide I want to steal a box of those tiny paper bags of explosives the pop when they hit the ground
>pocket them
>walk away
>Old bitch picks me up by the collar and screams 'NAATHAAAAAAAN!!'
>peed a little bit

I still don't know who Nathan is
Never shoplifted again

>>26349105
I'm a really experienced shoplifter anon only been caught when with other people I'd share my experiences and tips if anyone wants to hear them that is

>>26364167

I want to hear them

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>walk into ASDA
>pick up snickers as I enter the store
>eat it while I shop
>discard the evidence