>You got rid of the first girl as soon as things became inconvenient (in your words you made her go mad). You replaced her with a new younger girl to fulfill your desires. Now you're saying you want her back to comfort you during your depression.
>When you truly value a person you don't discard them when they stop doing whatever you want them to do. When you value someone you aren't with them to gain something from them to begin with.
>It doesn't sound like you care about hurting them.
Fucking shit you made me start a new post just to answer you.
She told me she couldn't handle it, I tried to keep her (to not show that I was secretly happy she got rid of me since I knew I hurt her)
Also, no as I said, I knew the younger girl for far longer and I didn't replace her.
I didn't say I want her back, faggot.
You're the most cancerous regard on this board.
I know I'm a shit person but you idiot literally only talked about untrue points.
It's like failing at shooting at the sky.
Feel free to discuss mental illness here, robots.
>She told me she couldn't handle it, I tried to keep her (to not show that I was secretly happy she got rid of me since I knew I hurt her)
what the fuck is this contradictory autism
>ADHD. Autism. Bipolar type 2. Depression. Split personality disorder due to childhood trauma
>Zero irl friends.
>Ex heroin addict.
>Only friend is probably dead so i have no one left.
>In a psych ward right now. Wanting to run away and do heroin again.
>Just a burden to evryone.
>I dont even have someone to play vidya with
I dont know how i havent taken and overdose yet and died. Im planning on doing it next weekend.
guys i dont think i can function in normal society. i really wnat to be homeless even if that means no personal possessions. i want to able to wander around as i wish but my concern is not being mugged, finding food, staying clean and of course finding money when you need it. i wish there were jobs you could get for like a few weeks to make money and then move on
I'm so fucking tired of holding it together. I want to just stop pretending, stop trying to act rational and normal, and just let it run.
I just want to give up and stop trying to hard to act normal.
I feel like I'm bashing my head against a brick wall. I don't know how I've lasted this long but I'm almost at the edge now.
What should I do?
Turns out I did, kek
Well.. it's complicated
Yes I want them back but no, it'd be bad so I don't actually want it.
If I'd be fine with it directly, she would feel like I never wanted to talk to her in the first place.
Anyone else have parents with a hard time understanding depression?
My mom mocks me for taking antidepressants and has even said "What do you have to be depressed about?" Like I'll admit when I hear about a rich and/or successful person taking their own life, I scratch my head. But I have no fucking clue what they could have been going through or how much stress they might have had.
I guess that's kinda how she sees mine. Also she thinks that religion will solve everything and that everything bad that happens to me is because I'm not a Christian. I kid you not, she said almost those exact same words to me one day when I was laying around in bed all day depressed because I lost my job.
I never call it depression, but I tell my parents how I feel trapped and how unhappy I am. They just tell me that it's ok to be unhappy.
They're not wrong, I know, but I don't want to be so unhappy.
>I tried to keep her
You tried to keep her after you hurt her because you are selfish.
>I was secretly happy she got rid of me since I knew I hurt her
You were happy to discard her after you hurt her because you knew you would be held accountable for what ever you did.
>If I'd be fine with it directly, she would feel like I never wanted to talk to her in the first place.
If you were really happy that she left you would have simply let her go. You've already admitted that you want her back. You're in denial.
>Yes I want them back but no, it'd be bad so I don't actually want it
You think it would be bad because you would have to face your flaws which narcissists cannot do.