AMA. In the first stages, trying to get some rest.
are you going to give your child a cool/autistic name like zygimantas?
NO THEY AREN'T
>You're probably just going to fap to it anyway,
WHY CAN'T SOMEONE THINK BABIES ARE CUTE WITHOUT IT BEING PERVERTED
FUCK YOU WE EVOLVED TO THINK THEY WERE CUTE
You're not going to get rest for the next 3 months at all, and very little for the next 3 years, starting with this labor. I hope you realize this, and you might think you do, but usually people don't. I'm not talking you won't get as much sleep by like an hour per night; I mean you will sleep at maximum like 4 hours per day, disjointed, for three months straight. If you're lucky. You're going to look 10 years older by the time the little one sleeps through the night (you may or may not recover your looks).
If you're unlucky like me, you'll have a little asshole that screams for no good reason every night from 10/11-12/1230 for a month. That's 1 to 2.5 hours of continuously screaming infant a night for 30 days straight. It's called "the witching hour" and it's literal torture. Causes are unknown and it's usually just a phase.
You'll have thoughts like "I could just leave this thing somewhere and sleep" and then feel like you're a piece of shit shortly after. You are, but so is everyone else and fleeting thoughts are not actions. Any parent has had the same thought and anyone telling you otherwise is a fucking liar.
Enjoy the shackles of parenthood. Hope you're older than 25 and had some fun already because now it's over.
My kid came out purple and blotchy, had the head of a xenomorph, and looked pissed off all the time the first week. Newborns are not cute, they're squished and deformed looking alien things. They get cuter once they put some weight on around like 2 weeks.
>TFW I want a little girl so bad but I'm intimidated by the idea of having sex with a dude and scared of the pain during birth
How does it feel to have any kind of man drop at your feet :) must be nice femanon
How does it feel to have an army of men making you feel better when you are lovesick :) must be nice femanon
How does it feel to get to swing between men like branches on a tree ) must be nice femanon
How does it feel not having everything about you invalidated just because you are gay :( must be really nice femanon
How does it feel to be the center of every minority group when you are a rich privileged girl ? Must be nice femanon