Anyone mentally ill?
I am having an auditory hallucination and its annoying as fuck
>Live in apartment
>Make slightest noise, like chair sqeaking a little when trying to stand up
>"Mom! 'that guy' made noise again!"
>Notice there is no way that kind of small noise could go through thick wall
>"Anon actually this is not voice from another floor but its telepathy from nearby city"
>Get in bed
>That sound from the bathroom pipe
>It sounds like a voice
>It is making fun of me
>Get angry because of this madness of mine
i'm tired of being called a meme, but i'm gonna be totally honest, i do feel sorta guilty for ending up with a 'lesser' mental illness whereas other people get fucked over by genetics and end up with things like bipolar or schizophrenia. and then i stop listening to 4chan and in stead listen to all the liberal white people saying that i'm just as valid. and i guess that makes me feel better or something.
Schizophrenia has no bearing on how stupid you are.
It isn't as much that you became dumber as much as it is that you likely simply cannot focus on the test or misunderstand/misinterpret the questions. Or simply that your thoughts are becoming more and more nonsensical. It's not the same as becoming dumber.
I use to hear shit before I'd go to sleep, and sometimes when its dark I assume shadows are rodents etc..
I know its all fake though and don't let it get to me, I've even just laughed it off knowing its fake and the fact that i actively don't give in to it, its pretty much subdued a lot.
When i was depressed it was a lot worse too, but now that im legitimately extactic all the time its a rare occurance, so that that as you will op.
you can read the textbook symptoms here
but the basic just of it is unstable emotions, complete lack of identity, very impulsive, extreme insecurity, emptiness, constantly feeling like everyone is going to leave you and fearing that more than death, and dissociation
i think i read the name, borderline, is supposed to mean on the border between neurotic and psychotic. it certainly feels maddening. it just feels like never being okay for a moment, always being torn apart by wild emotions you have no idea how to control. you just feel so much and you can't make it stop.
Me 2 OP
Last night my bed sheet kept rustling in a way like it was mocking me.
I'm currently a psychotic wreck experiencing auditory and visual hallucinations every day. Keep having this weird feeling like I'm not in anyway connected to things happening in reality even though they're happening right infront of me. Also I don't feel anything at all. Been taking Risperidone but it isn't really helping.
>finally scored psychedelics 2 months ago, took 2 LSD and 4 salvia trips
Were they great and exciting experiences? Yes. Am I still seeing shit? Um yea
If I look at a wall long enough it starts slightly waving, also I will get after images when I move my head, sometimes the after-images will change color before disappearing like 5 seconds later
I know it's all my fault so I'm gonna stop using these indefinitely and see if they go away eventually. They aren't alarming or distracting, just a constant reminder that I'm irresponsible
I feel you. Maybe we can feel each other.
People knew my name, how I look, where I live, Which Uni I go, and etc etc etc. It was kind of mindraping there. And even after I came out of military gossip flowed out to civilian society. I dropped out of Uni, and I am top tier robot frog now.
I prefer not to speak that in public. People might recognize me. Sorry. But I can say I did not harm anyone but make them think I am disgusting. And I am disgusting person, so I could not argue about it.
I am scared of that memory. I am sorry, but I cant. Sorry for being a mad, boring person.
>solve for x
>doesn't even give a proper equation
But I'm saying, if he's gonna tell us "solve for x" he's gonna have to tell us what's on the other side of the equation. Everyone is just assuming it's a zero, when it could be any number.
Also, I am schizo too. Have hallucinations all the time, voices rob me of my thoughts and replace them with others, etc.
eh, i doubt it's what they've done, just what they feel about it. i've admitted the darkest secrets on 4chan because this place is anonymous, but that's only because i don't feel guilty about them. if i'd killed someone, i sure as hell wouldn't even mention it on here because i'd be too guilty.
Schizoaffective & aspie. almost died in a psychiatric hospital. just found out about aripiprazole and brain shrinkage what do? thinking about talking to my psychologist about cutting down. liberty or death