> work in a theme park > doughnuts > need to replace the Fanta syrup box over > realise that I'm all alone in the unit > park isn't open yet > cum into the part where the pump & the bag connect > connect the pump onto the syrup bag, which is in the box > hold back laughter as a few hundred people have my cum in their mouths
A lot of teenage girls where in the park that day, I think may have broken the law
Anyone else here habitually destroy autistic girls?
Best one [1/2] >be me >be ~15 >be sometimes the unwilling object of affection for autistic girls >on facebook one day >Some friend of a friend messages me >being an emo faggot myself, I insult her for being such a normie to pose in a prom dress >mfw prom hasn't even happened yet >mfw we're both in sophomore year >look closer >Girl is wearing a Disney princess costume >She is not pulling it off well at all. >Tells me about her bisexuality, her love for screamo bands, all that good circa 2010 shit. >Says she's got Asperger's and people don't like her for it at school. >She seriously has no filter. She's def got the 'spergs. >Says she has a crush on me >Says she's coming to my school band performance >yeahokaywhatever.jpg >Sure enough >See her in the audience >Even worse looking in person, I shudder to this day imagining what she'd look like without the emofail garb. >Go up to her after the show >She hugs me and asks me to be her bf >Tell her I'll think about it >She says she wants to hang out anyway. >Walk around school grounds and I give her compliments, to feel like I'm wooing her just in case I wanna tap that. Which, of course, I don't because aspie girls are 1/2 the time just as clingy as borderlines. >Give her a kiss on the cheek, my phone number, tell her I'll call her.
>work a movie theater >old lady insists on sitting until the very end of the credits >have stand to wait for her old ass >I'm flat-footed as fuck, so standing for a while hurts like crazy >She takes even long because she somehow lost her earring under the seat >tell her that I'll find it and bring it to the lost and found and that she can just come back for it >find it later >throw into the trash
>see someone post on this board about a dire situation they are in >start writing out advice I feel will help them cope based on my own experiences with a similar situation >don't finish writing up post and instead contribute to a frogposter's thread
>>26249518 >She calls me that night. I don't answer. >She calls again as soon as it goes to voicemail. >She calls again. >And again >&again >Answer it and don't say anything and wait for her to say something. >"H-hello?" >Hang up. >She calls again.And again and again and again. >She calls 30 times a day for the next week >I'm on a band trip and I've silenced my calls from her so it's only a moderate minor inconvenience. >Not gonna lie, I found it kinda funny. >Answer one day. Tell her I'll only go out with her if she comes out as bisexual to her christoconservative parents >She calls me and tells me she's done it. >Mfw I really didn't expect this and now feel in2deep >I tell her I'm not really interested anymore. Apologize. >She starts crying on the phone and says she loves me. >Don't know how to deal with girls crying. Say sorry. Hang up. >Two days later she is sent to one of those Christian boarding schools in Utah for Troubled Teens (tm) >Gone for 2 months >No one has heard from her >Late into second month get word from some emo faggot writing a song about her that she returned home after a bried stay and killed herself a little over a month prior >Her suicide becomes the school meme. >Mfw I might have done this.
>boss at work treats me really poorly >"works from home" twice per week with no notice >makes it impossible to get in touch with her to confirm details >blames me for shit that isn't my fault and takes credit for my work >regularly dumps work on me at 4:30 >i'm working 70 hours per week (and don't get paid overtime) >boss wants to plan surprise baby shower for woman in my office >patting herself on the back constantly >sends repeated emails so people give her credit >all she's actually doing is asking for money >pregnant lady is a bitch too >yells at people then blames hormones >on morning of the party i write "surprise baby shower 2:00" on a paper towel >female friend follows pregnant lady into bathroom >places paper towel on top of stack >pregnant lady sees message >everyone waits in conference room >"surprise!" >pregnant lady doesnt look surprised in the slightest >admits she knew but doesn't say how she found out >boss cries
Cake was chocolate with vanilla frosting. Pretty good day overall.
>be me >coming home from school >girl looks at me and laughs secretly with her friend >REE hard and charge her >bulldoze her into the ground >leave to play video games all night >during the same week see her in a wheelchair >the skinny bitch had broken a leg in the fall >no legal consequences, mummy may or may not have covered me >had already fucked up male bullies so no one did shit to me
Still no idea what they were saying about me but I smile every time
>be full time babysitter >paid 250 a week to watch 2yr old triplet boys >super sweet and involved with the kids till parents leave for work (cooking breakfast playing chase etc) >as soon as they leave and kids finish eating put them all in pull ups and give each one a generous dose of benadryl to knock them our >invite over fwb >eat their snacks smoke weed and fuck till kids' parents get home around 8pm
notice that i need more benadryl to knock those little fuckers out recently though
>>26248585 >stay with sister and her friend at their house >drink about half a bottle of smirnoff to myself, they where drinking whiskey >her and her friend usually sleep together in the double bed >her friend gave me another mattress to sleep on but my sister wants to stay with me for the night >lay there awake for hours as we are cuddling having time of my life >her friend gets up for work at about 5am so we both get into the comfy double bed >shes asleep in about 5 minutes with my arms around her >couple hours go by and ive been rock solid for some time >decide to masturbate while next to her >laid on my back left hand on my dick right hand down her leggings on her ass >fully going for it just groping and smelling her >start rubbing my fingers against her pussy outside the pants >came on my side of the bed and used the sheet to mop it up >went to sleep and the next day she had no idea >im 18 shes 20
>>26250596 you know, it's possible she knows and simply doesn't want to confront you about it. maybe she thinks its too awkward yo bring up, maybe she actually enjoyed it and wants to avoid acknowledging it, but it's very possible that she knows what you did. especially if she said she wanted to 'stay with you for the night'
I did the same thing to a female acquaintance and was convinced she didn't know but it turned out she did.
>>26250761 Yeah man sounds as if she knows for certain and doesn't mind but doesn't wanna talk about it to you. Like when girls say things like "oh i don't wanna put a label on it" about their relationships, she doesn't wanna talk about it because then it'll be a 'defined thing' in her life.
But I totally get you I'm the same with some my female friends [with benefits], and the cuddles/making out is the best part. I love it when you're lying together and they make the first move and you just play hard to get and they keep edging you on until they're pretty much stroking your dick. They are the best of times.
>>26250834 Well senpai the thing is my dad and her mother split up when i was about 5, shes only recently came back into my life and i just love the fact she loves me enough to keep coming over to me pretty much every day
I would have sex with her but i feel like because shes autistic it would fuck her life up more than i would mine you know.
i don't mean to get all emotional on r9k with someone i don't know but ive been drinking so i don't mind much, can i ask who you are doing this with? are they related to you or is it just a friend
>>26250887 ah man that actually sounds like such a comfy/pleasant situation you're in desu, good that you two have gotten closer again. Yeah I wouldn't say go for the sex myself, but stay as close as you two are right now definitely. Also very nice of you to think of how it might affect her and not just following your nob!
haha no worries man I'm a little drunk myself. Mine's just a friend but one of those friends from childhood that was always more like a sister. She's really attractive too in a unique way, like an arty fashion model. And the funniest girl I know irl desu. Then there's another girl I used to be like this with but she got a boyfriend very recently and they're pretty serious, we're still flirty though, just don't do anything at all.
>>26250991 Thanks man it is a pretty nice situation really, you sound like a cool guy senpai and im happy we are both in a good position.
Again thanks for the advice, i was debating posting it here because i'm not entirely sure if she lurks here or not but for now i think ill take your advice and not bring it up and just continue the way things are, she has been getting more and more upfront with me about things and we have been talking about deep shit to eachother, for example i told her about some lewd things between me and my younger cousin and she said she won't judge me.
This is honestly the best feeling i have been in my entire life and i just don't want to fuck things up but at the same time i don't want to tease her and lead her on, she means alot to me senpai
eh even if she does the chance of her being on exactly when you are and seeing the exact same thread is very low, and you can say it wasn't you desu. yeah, this might sound like silly advice but literally just don't force anything and see where it goes. you two will probably always be close whatever happens, just let things develop naturally. the thing you say about your younger cousin makes me 1000% more sure that she knows about what you did/do while she was/is asleep too. yeah it's a nice feeling, like some of the nicest parts of being in a relationship without the stresses of a relationship, more like a long honeymoon. sounds like you're already very honest with each other so just keep being honest and you won't be leading her on, sounds like you wouldn't be able to do that even if you tried because of how close you two are/how genuinely sound you seem to be. s'all good, enjoy it.
>>26251141 mate that's not even what we're talking about. and this conversation basically stems from "we groped some girls while they were asleep and they enjoyed it", not exactly 'nice thread' material is it?
>dated ugly women in highschool and fucked them despite them being disgusting hambeasts that churned my stomach >wait until I told them they loved me >dumped them >told everyone they were fucking liars
>>26251274 Feeeeemales may be largely unempathetic /sociopaths/ but many of them are autistics who don't wash their cunts and do dress mannish because autism and pack on the pounds, inevitably facing social rejection. Those are the closest things to girlbots.
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