What's the most alone you've ever felt?
>friend is having a birthday party
>overhear a couple of friends saying "make sure you dont invite anon"
>shrug it off
>one of my friends asks me if I'm going to the party so we can carpool
>we drive there
>knock on the door
>everybody except the the birthday boy looks at me angrily and with disgust
>one of my closest friends asks "what are you doing here?" with disdain
>drop present off while fighting back tears
I still haven't recovered from that day.
Not quite a lonely feeling but here's a time my power level was almost revealed.
> 2nd semester of college, in speech class
> Everyday the professor asks a question and we answer it for a grade
> Today's happens to be "What was your first kiss like?"
> All the normies are describing theirs with all the "awws"
> My turn
> Quietly say "Pass" under my breath and teacher moves on
Wasn't really mad at the teacher, but fuck. That question was like a fucking precision targeting missile. Felt like a fucking alien. Something that is so commonplace for normal people is something I will never experience.
>1 year ago
>loser recluse tranny
>get put in looney bin
>everyone is so nice
>have meals and watch tv with each other like the family's you see on tv
>fall asleep next to other really sweet mental people in the living room area
>wake up to good mornings and smiles
That small taste of normalcy left me with a whole new meaning of lonely
I halfway know that feel
I had mine at 14 (inb4 normie get out) and it made me realize how pathetic I was.
>be at some summer camp
>normies wake me up at 6am
>they want to play truth or dare
>we go to an unused campground put of sight of the rest of the camp
>goes for a while
>eventually they get to a qt from the track team of my school
>"dare you to kiss anon lol"
>she stares at me for a minute
>I have a deer in the headlights kind of look
>she says fine but she doesn't want anyone else to watch
>normies go all "awww" and turn around
>she basically headbutts me with her lips
>trying to get it over with as fast as possible
>everyone turns back around
>"OMG you did it?? ewww lol"
>she wipes her mouth on her sleeve
>spits on ground
>let game go for a bit longer
>mfw I have been kissed and it crushed any hopes I had for a gf
why are normies cruel to us? what did I ever do to anyone?
Have several small stories
>High school Chemistry class
>get paired with petite dirty blonde girl with nice ass as lab partners
>add her on Facebook
>we've only ever talked about subjects related to class
>During a lab I decide to start some general chit chat with her and ask her if she's seen any good movies lately
>She gives me a look of pure disgust
>Respond with "ok I understand"
Also another time in Middle School:
>During math class
>teacher has to get hand outs from library computer and leaves the classroom.
>Huge stacy in the grade starts kissing literally everyone on the cheek
>Simply watch in indifference
>Everyone starts daring her to kiss me.
>She simply laughs and goes back in her seat
And now I regularly fuck escorts who give me tons of affection, and pretend to be my gf for 2 hours.
Pathetic I know.
Probably my first birthday after my mom died. That was when it really hit me for the first time that I was completely and utterly alone.
>had spent the day at home because I didn't want to work
>started the day off sad, had just gotten worse as it went on
>started drinking heavily around 4 pm to keep myself occupied and maybe numb the pain a little
>girl I loved showed up to ask how I'd been
>first time I'd talked to her in over 5 years
>she was the only person left who cared whether I lived or died
>somehow knowing she cared still just made me hurt even more
>broke down and cried on my living room floor once she had left
She came back the next day with a kitten from her cat's most recent litter because she thought having one around would make me feel better It does
This original comment is a thing of beauty 9/10
I have a very similar
>truth or dare
>"stacy, I dare you to kiss him in the cheek"
>"ok, don't turn your head huh"
>5 mins later
>"I dare you to kiss anon in the cheek"
>"lol not anon I'm out"
>cry myself to sleep this day
>be lonely khv but never cared too much
>meet girl online
>we hit it off
>her internet goes down literally the next day.
>dont talk for a month because of it
>thinks she was probably freaked out by me.
>decide to download skype on phone one day
>see a couple of messages from her a few days old
>she didnt forget about me
>talk for months
>end up bf and gf
>be really lovey dovey
>plan on meeting up soon
>her internet is either again or she got tired of me
>its been two days and I feel lonelier than before I had a gf.
>i miss her so much.
One of my teachers did that in high school for all her classes. It was kind of nice, I liked her. She was the only teacher who ever believed in me.
>went in the day I turned 18 to drop out
>she happened to catch me emptying my locker
>she hugged me and told me to keep in touch and that I could call her if I ever needed a friend
Wildlife conservation and survey efforts, as well as equipment checks. Kure is only like 50 miles from Midway, where I was volunteering, so every couple of weeks they'd drop us there for a couple days. One time I got left on my own.
>haven't talked to real person besides family in a year
>steam friends rarely talk to me
>barely anyone replies to my posts
>tfw watching tv and youtube and seeing people outside of their house with friends, hobbies and jobs
>Working in the oilfield in North Dakota back when it was an oilfield
>Had a gf of 3 years at home and 2 roommates who also had the same job I did
>Break up with gf while at work because that's what you do in the oilfield
>was planning on visiting her on days off
>Cancel my flights, go back to my apartment for my week off
>Find out both of my roommates quit
>Sit alone in my 3-bedroom apartment and wait for work to start again because my job is now my only friend
My recruiter called me and asked how I was doing and how the new job was going. That helped a little bit.
I feel you anon.
This made me feel so alone. I used to be somebody.
>alone on my birthday (only my dad visited)
>alone on christmas
>alone on new year's eve
I used to be semi-normal and now I rarely get to use my voice because I lost contact with all my friends and most of my family.
Too ashamed to contact my family because I was a NEET for 2 years and now work a minimum wage job because I was kicked out of the house.
Life is hard when you fuck up.
The time I felt most alone
>Actually had a gf for a few years
>Only gf and only girl I've ever slept with, im 30 years old.
>live together, next to each other every night
>she cheats on me with ex from high school
>breaks up with me for him before either of us can move out
The first night I slept alone in our bed while I knew she was with him having sex was the loneliest I've ever felt.
>just finished working a night shift at my shitty fast food job
>a week prior to this I had nearly lost my virginity to a coworker but I couldn't get an erection
>sitting in my dirty, shitty room in my apartment while my roommate is out with his gf
>sit and think of all the ways in which I am worthless and unlovable
>sit and think of all the ways in which I have disappointed friends and loved ones
>sit and think of all the ways in which I have alienated everyone who has ever cared about me
>suddenly get a text from my dad
>"Hey, son. It's been a long time since we've talked. I don't know where you are in your life, but your grandmother just died. I thought you should know."
I have never wanted to die more than I did in that moment.
My prom was an absolutely awful experience.
First off after I asked the girl she started getting close with my friend, so I started getting more distant from all my friends in general. But by now I couldn't just say "Yo, I'd rather not go with you because you're my mates gf" because she already bought a dress and I'd look like an asshole.
Then my mom went to Canada for two weeks without telling me so I was the only person home when the time came and had to get my neighbour to give me a lift. At this point I had already devoured a bottle of wine and brought another one with me - which I finished at here house.
Then I just awkwardly stood around for a bit before her dad was ready to go.
Then we got there so I instantly went to the off-license for more drink and necked another bottle of wine before dinner and smuggled in some vodka for during. At this point I was absolutely loaded so I didn't feel quite as bad about getting cucked by my mate and sitting at a table full of all the other friendless autists. I don't think I talked to any of my old friends for more than a minute the entire night.
Then I lost 50 grams of tobacco and got kicked out because someone narced that I brought in vodka and had to wait around with the teachers before a family friend could show up.
At this point I went and got a 3 leet of cider and finished that at home before getting a taxi back for the after party. I remember nearly nothing after this point and I'm glad because the little that I do remember is just feeling sad.
No friends, no gf, no family, I've never been so glad to have been so drunk.