>"You know I really like spending time with you Anon. I know you hate talking about yourself too much but even from you've told me I feel like I'm getting to know someone who I can't help but care very much about. I felt really bad for asking you the other day whether you'd ever been in love or not. I mean I figured you'd say yes but even when I was asking it I sort of realized your answer would be no. But it's a shame, really, because to me you really someone I can't imagine myself not being in love with."
>"Do you think you'll ever get in with him again? Oh no, I understand. I mean, well, I'm not trying to say I understand what it's like not to have a dad, but I get why you wouldn't want to see him again. You know this is going to sound really cheesy but when you visited my hometown over the holidays my dad told me he'd be proud to call you his son. I mean he was drunk, but he just doesn't say things like that about anybody. He grew up without a father too you know. He was so shy when he first met my mother, she had to make all the first moves since he was so sure she'd get bored of him and like abandon him or something. I guess he sees a lot of himself in you, I don't know. You just made a good impression."
>"But it's raining! Oh Anon, don't pressure me like this you know I'll give in! Okay okay, I'm coming. But we're going to get soaked, you know that right? If I wasn't so hungry I'd tell you to take a hike, you know that right! Wait. Before we go outside. When we get back we are running the bath all the way to the top and sitting in there until the water gets cold, alright mister!"
>"You're so goofy Anon. You know that? Around other people you're so quiet and serious, I bet they wouldn't believe me if I told them what you're like around me. No, I'm not complaining. You make me laugh. As strange as you are you really do make me laugh. I mean half the time I can't even tell if you're joking, but I guess that just makes it even more hilarious."
What the absolute fuck is this shit?
I'm not going to say it's worse than trap threads of fembot threads of other shit spam, I'm trying to remain level headed here.
What is this shit, and what is it doing on /r9k/
Some faggots roleplaying as some roastie.
>"No I don't think it's autistic. I mean I might be wrong, I'm no doctor or anything. But honestly I think it's sort of attractive that you're so passionate about something in life. I've met so many people who are happy to just drift around trying their best to fit in and be like other people. For better or worse you're kinda unique in that sense. I understand you're sensitive to how other people perceive you, but I suppose it's because they probably don't come across people like you all that often. I think you're a real catch Anon, I mean it."
>Feels: The thread
>"Oh look, there are two empty seats a little further on. Do you mind if I sit by the window Anon? Thanks. Hey I made some sandwiches and stuff if we get hungry. You know I'm really excited to see your hometown Anon. I hope the weather stays like this, not too bright but warm enough to for a long walk without catching a cold. Thanks again for inviting me to meet your parents Anon, I hope I make a good impression!"
>"He has no style, he has no grace. This Kong has a funny face. He can handstand when he needs to. And stretch his arms out, just for you. Inflate himself just like a balloon. This crazy Kong just digs this tune. Huh!"
>my dad told me he'd be proud to call you his son
>"The guys can't cope. They lose it. They get on the radio and report enemy movement, a whole army, they say, and they order up the fire-power. They get arty and gunships. They call in air strikes. And I'll tell you, they fuckin' crash that cocktail party. All night long, they just smoke those mountains. They make jungle juice. They blow away trees and glee clubs and whatever else there is to blow away. Scorch time. They walk napalm up and down the ridges. They bring in the Cobras and F-4s, they use Willie Peter and HE and incendiaries. It's all fire. They make those fuckin' mountains burn"
>"Do you remember when we were just kids, when we'd walk back home after school together? You know even though were only young back then, I often felt like holding your hand while we were walking. I didn't even know what it meant for people to hold hands at that point, I just knew I wanted to hold yours! Did you ever think we'd end up going out? I always kinda hoped we would, but you know people change so much in highschool and drift apart. But there's something about you that's never changed, I can't say what it is exactly but sometimes when I look at smiling or goofing around or doing something around the apartment I can still see the same boy I so badly wanted to hold with all those years ago."
some other anon wrote this but i saved it
>"Why don't you just leave Anon? Can't you see everybody here is uncomfortable around you. Do you realize how unpleasant you are? You're so awkward, and it's obvious that you think your being as quiet and miserable as you are makes you deep or interesting or something else that you're so obviously not. I'm sure you find reasons to justify your terrible personality sometimes. I bet you often tell yourself that you're this innocent person surrounded by people who are corrupted or however you frame it. Really, it's so pathetic that I feel bad pointing out how childish and sad you really are. I mean you have no friends. Nobody wants to spend time with you. Are you really naive enough to think that it's something wrong with other people that makes them not want to be in your company unless they have to? Really Anon, I think you and I both know what action you should take to make up for the embarrassment that is your life. This world isn't for you, and the older you get the more you will resent it and yourself for bringing you nothing but misery and the occasional delusion of mutual attraction. Nobody could love someone like you. I bet you wouldn't even love yourself if you had a choice."
>I bet you wouldn't even love yourself if you had a choice.
STOP WITH THESE CRINGE THREADS
>implying anyone actually talks like this in real life
>implying women have any sort of romantic/feeling worthy vocabulary in their system
>implying they don't speak the most basic of the language
>implying they would go in depth about anything in their conversations or make redundant points three times in the same sentence
Crazhing this thread...
WITH NO SURVIVORS.