are there any robots here with mental issues and strange social interactions that are actually fighting to get their lives back or improve?
tell me about those ups and downs.
you know what i mean, those days that you win a fight those others that you fall but you still stand up and try again.
you will hear my name someday. i am not anhero i mean because i will rise from the robotic desperation and despair. and you should know that it is a good fight.
You don't get it do you? No matter how far up you rise, you will always succumb and fall back down to the pit of despair. I have been back and forth from r9k for years always returning to my vomit
> mental issues and strange social interactions
> tell me about those ups and downs.
Who are you trying to fool OP? You just said it yourself. You are fucked and have already been played a bad set of cards. Continue to waste your time but you will ALWAYS end up right where you started.
I'm trying, and if I succeed, I will bring mental suffering to those around me. "You guys wasted time on college, you have deadend jobs, you guys are idiots because you couldn't see I was the smart one!"
Goal: send them into depression.
me too but i keep getting better. ithe fire rises.
however the stronger i get the stronger anxiety feels. and the despair gets darker..
maybe my anxiety will kill me in the end. being dealing with it 18 years.
10 of those undiagnosed hell on eaeth teen years.
op here with one more tank.
Just apply for those autism bux already OP. Just give up.
I had the very same pic but I deleted it t.b.h
Do you play war thunder ?
>and you should know that it is a good fight.
On every fucking level no.
It doesn't matter if the fight is good or bad.
You are alive.
Was it good or bad, you fought.
There is enough deceit to grease the wheels and convince you even more never fucking stop fighting. Don't forgive traitors. If they didn't do you in and you can still fight keep fighting.
>diagnosed schizophrenia in early 20's
>had one e-gf when I was 14
>smoked weed all day every day
>started doing hard drugs
>got beaten within an inch of my life by some angry drunk
>in a coma for 2 months
>decide to change my life
>get treatment for schizophrenia
gf who is pregnant now
just that u can syand and keep figjting the misery, doesn't that make it a good fight by definition?
god damn my sperg english why can't i express myself?
i feel it but can't communicate it.
>Spend ages 6 through 20 cripplingly depressed
>In and out of therapy
>On and off several SSRIs
>Eventually give up, just try to live with myself
>End up in the psych ward for suicide attempt 4 months later
>See yet another fuckin therapist
>Actually click with this one, can talk and receive genuine responses instead of canned "but have you tried exercise" ones
>Gives me a referral for a psych eval
>98th percentile ADHD, but extremely atypical which is why nobody noticed before
>Also exhibit distinct bipolar type 2 tendencies
>Start Depakote for bipolar and adderall for ADHD
It's been just under a year since I started and my life has improved immeasurably. I can actually focus, self-study, remember things. I see projects through to the end.
Most importantly I am no longer a constant trainwreck of emotion. I could probably deal with myself on a lower dosage of depakote, but I would rather feel the mostly bland nothing I do now than even possibly feel like I used to.
I still have really off days and I'm trying to accept the fact that I wasted basically my entire youth. I know I'm still young but it's such a bitter pill to swallow knowing I could've been a part of that nervous infatuated love teenagers have.
>Had a mental breakdown in highchool after dating a girl for four years who sent me pics of a beautiful cheerleader and turned out to be a hamplanet
>autistically sperg out and drop out, not talking to hardly anyone for 6 years
>blame everyone for my failure for a long time, tell myself that the reason it happened to me was because i was bullied because i was short ect.
>am now becoming an indie game developer and am working on forgiving everyone and myself
>going to try to promote forgiveness going forward in the stories of my games
>hopefully make a lot of money and meet a qt azn and treat her right
feels good man.
Well my spergy little friend, you have every right to exist as everything else. No matter what the rest of us say or do, if you can't fight for it when we can't.....
Don't stop fighting.
i ll try. hopefully won't give up and worship escapism like i used to in school..
> be me
> diagnosed with paranoia, boderline and bipolar disorder, and even psicotic depression from an early age (16)
> be manlet
> suck at everything i do
>no more money for medication or theraphy.
>I want to get of this ride
what to do i already tried almost everything