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Who here able to pass for Normie IRL?
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001

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Who here able to pass for Normie IRL?
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>>26120344
I can pass normie in small interactions. If i were to have any actual friend or gf it would become clear soon enough though.
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sort of doing that tonight. I still hate myself though
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>>26120344

>Normalfags very friendly to me ( don't know why)
>Wear decent clothes
>Lift often
>Can talk for short periods of time without having a melt down


I can do it!
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>>26120414
>Wear decent clothes
>Lift often
>Can talk for short periods of time without having a melt down

This is virtually all it takes to pass as normie. Being able to talk about sports, movies and whatever the current water-cooler tv show is also a benefit.
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>>26120467
On second thought, subtract the "Lift often". That helps but not essential as not dressing like a sperg and being able to make small talk.
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>literally memorized social algorithms for school/work settings, and adapted it for normal social situation
>spent several months developing rote facial expressions and postures
>lift often
>have 35 small talk algorithms ready to go at any given time
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>>26120490

It's useful to be able to bullshit through small conversation. Normies regularly approach me. ( for some reason, I sometimes wonder if I have a really normalfag look) . Meltdowns do happen

>In philosophy section of barnes and noble
>Asian homosexual next to me strikes up conversation about philosophy
>Don't know what to say because caught off guard
>"well, you uh..you wanna pick something uhhh.. it depends on what you like hmmm.. uhhhh"
>PANIC
>Turn away from faggot
>walk away
>Out of store
>Don't look back
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>>26120601
Care to share the algorithms with a failed normie?
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>>26120601
Out of interest, can you share the algorithms?
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>>26120601
Give me those algorithms
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>>26120601
what are the algorithms man i need the algorithms
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In my manic state I can.
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>>26120467
Sports is where I fall short, but yup your absolutely right.
>>
>can't understand what someone says
>laugh and smile and nod anyway
>use those stupid stock phrases like 'well what can you do?" and "it can't be helped" and "do your best"
>when pressed find literally the most inane, inoffensive, obvious thing I can think of saying and say it with a sarcastic tone
>when all else fails just repeat back the last few words of whatever the person said
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>>26120344
me. I lift 3-5 times a week, seem pretty normie.
also studying so no one cares much anyway.
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>>26120344
I can be normie but i need appropriate clothes
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>>26120344

Not quite pass, but most people think I'm just a little eccentric. I'm always surprised how well I can fool people in to thinking I'm not cripplingly shy when I'm in some kind of structured setting like work or a class or something.
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>>26121045
This post is too fucking relatable.
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>>26120719
>>26120740
>>26120886
>>26120910

Failed normie trying to blend in here. Am no the algorithm dude here is what made small talk little bit easier for me
>refer to something you have in common
>make a short comment about what someone just said and ask for more details/what happend next
>repeat/paraphrase what a person just said
>if conversation is dying off say with some confidence you have to do some random shit

At this point i got refered to as a "good listener" kek.

More advanced stuff includes
>saying something you actualy think
>add something that happend to you that is related to topic(shit doesnt have to be true just make it belivable)
>changing topic for one you are more comfortable with
>saying some semi-random shit (just dont sound like you memorized wikipedia)

Uber advanced is telling a story yourself.
We can make it robots.
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>>26120344
You're just a normie with weird interests, faggot
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>>26121977
cont. Forgot about few things.

People in general sometimes feel awkward renembering this will make them feel more relatable.

Another noob tier thingy you can do is tallk about other people. Just be positive ex. looks in general, something you overheard they said, something you saw them do, their acomplishments. This make you seem like a "nice guy" and if the person is friends with the person you might score some bonus normie community points.

Advanced. HONEST compliments. Works wonders.

No fucking jokes/puns when you just met someone. Learned the hard way.

Also robots Small talk is just a skill like eny other you can learn trough practice.

Sorry for my post being such a fucking mess.
Good luck!
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>>26121977
This is really all you need to do to be perceived as normal. You can be incredibly fucked up inside but practicing this will make life much easier. People will tolerate you and may even come to like you, but accept not everyone is going to like you. When you freak someone out, own it, someone else who sees it might like you more.
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Tbh I'm quite normie, I'm still fat but not like morbidly obese and a kissless virgin, like have conversations with people normally with girls too, I just came to accept the fact I can't really get girls
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>>26121977
>>26122281

As a passable normie, I can confirm this is all true. I struggle sometimes with paraphrasing what people say because I often find that what normies talk about is incredibly boring and EXTREMELY predictable. If someone is telling me a funny story or joke I usually always know where it's going to end up before they even finish telling it. It's hard to be a normie when I find everything they say to be incredibly boring 90% of the time.
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I was never able to in my younger years, but now I'm apparently really good at it. I started dressing more normally, stopped being fat, and became qt. Also I don't talk about weird shit that normies don't possess the ability to comprehend, and I utilize the magic of small talk.
>>
Working retail made me an expert at carrying conversations, pretending to be interested in small talk and laughing at shitty jokes.

I'd pass for Normie with flying colors now. Unless they spent an entire weekend with me or something but when is that ever gonna happen?
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>>26122669
How long did you work in retail before you noticed some improvement?
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>>26122897
I've been in retail for 12 years (pic related) not sure at what point I became comfortable with people though. Probably 5 years ago or so but that was also when I started living alone. Probably one less thing for me to feel self conscious about which helped.
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>>26122976
Hoped to hear something like 1 year. Doesnt look like a good plan to become a non-autistic normie enymore. And yeah the job itself seems pretty shitty...
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>>26123334
Fuck no. I wouldn't recommend it to anyone trying to become a normie, being able to function in social situations with normies is a by product. Forcing socialization and working to improve things about yourself would have the same or more impact and doesn't come with a soul crushing occupation.
>>
>Dont look too horribly bad
>Wear decent clothes
>Can actually socialize with most people decently enough
>Not too hard to make friends
However
>Absolutely despise most people
>Focus too strongly on flaws of both certain people and people in general
>Start hating most people
>Only really talk to and be friendly with some people so I can get them to do shit for me and help me with shit
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I can pass for normie and be really charming if I need to, all you have to do is mimic them so they feel comfortable around you and talk about recent events or movies or something simple.

I just find it annoying since it takes a lot of energy to be sociable for me and most people are really irritating anyway and would rather not bother socializing at all.

>tfw dont even fit in on /r9k/ because everyone else seems to want to be a normie but cant
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>>26120344
I'm actually really personable in the short run. I can banter with guys and get girls to laugh. I just have no idea how to keep it up over time or make it more than a passing thing to get through an evening. It's fucking exhausting. My dad is a robot. Granddad is a Chad. I could probably have turned out different under other circumstances.
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>>26122281
Advanced technique: normies get very uncomfortable when you "remember" them, but they don't "remember" you. The trick here is to have a plausible excuse to have met somebody you otherwise would not know except through social media stalking. Parties are great, especially big ones. People are drinking, there is a ton going on, etc. Basically, you just say: "Hey, your name is ______, right? We met at ______." Use some trivial details of the even to establish the backstory and you are golden. As quickly as possible after initiating, transition the conversation onto why you approached them to begin with. Instant new friend/group of friends if you play your cards right.
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I like to think so, but I really doubt it
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>>26124664
>I just have no idea how to keep it up over time or make it more than a passing thing to get through an evening.

Spent the night with normie friends. It was a good time. Get a call the next afternoon inviting me out somewhere else they're going. Tell them I don't feel well. Fuck me, I had a good time but it's exhausting. I need recovery time.
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>>26124006
I feel the same way. I can pull it off, but it's fucking tiresome and I start to get irritated if I'm around people for too long. The hardest part of my job is dealing with other people, I don't mind the physical aspect at all.
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Can someone post that pepe with a backwards blue hat and dancing?
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>>26126282
Fuck you this is an original comment you literally can't disagree.
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>>26120947
I have been pretending to be an avid football fan for years

Never failed me
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In the muhreens so everyone expects me to be a normie
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I don't fucking know how, but I suddenly one day started being able to get girls to want to fuck me, despite (as you can tell) being a fucking autistic piece of shit
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>>26126636
how did this start

are you good looking?
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>>26126636
You're probably Chad as fuck and don't even know it desu
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>>26126781
>>26126809
I'm really not at all. This was taken right this second while I lie on my bed. I got her number when she matched with me on tinder yesterday.
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>>26121977
This. Spot on.
Just ask random questions about the person you're talking too (Not too many tho, or you'll come up as creepy).
People only like to talk about themself, even if they don't realize it.
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>>26126884
Ok ffs none of you will believe me I bet but I just got off the phone with a different bird I've been gaming as well and she wants me to come to hers tonight to drink with her but I've already said I'm gonna see the one in my original pic and oh lord how do I manage this this is going to blow up in my face I don't know enough about people or how to resolve this to be in this situation
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>>26126884
You're good looking bro.
You probably don't belong here desu :/
You can easily get a grill
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>>26120344
>be normie
>be seen as weird by someone
>others start doing the same
>become /r9k/ish


It's like they just riled me up for their curiosity to be satisfied.
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>>26120344
Unless you have a severe physical/mental disability, then anyone.
Not an attractive one, but you could look like a normal average person if you pull out all your charisma for a small talk
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>>26127117
...you think I look good? I really appreciate that
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>>26126636
More?
Show us how to normie.
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Im sure I look like an apex normie to my work mate
little do they know Im just a scared little fetus assimilating an alpha
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>>26127135
Wel this is the last I messaged the one who called me up five minutes ago, this was last night when I was out cruising with my mates
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>>26127131
What the hell your face is 7/10 at worst go get a girl fucking faggot
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>>26124798
>normies get very uncomfortable when you "remember" them, but they don't "remember" you

fucking this
i frequently pretend i don't remember or notice things or people just so i don't look like i'm obsessed or a stalker or something
why are normies so fucking oblivious jesus christ
>>
Who /stupidaura/ here?
My body language and my behavior is completely "Idk what the fuck I'm doing" but incredibly enough, it has worked well over the years on drawing people close to me, they're always really sympathetic to me
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>>26120344
Not exactly pass as a normie but normies keep me around because I'm harmlessly unusual and have a good sense of humor when comfortable with people.

Have had relationships/ hook ups with many a Stacey but people always say "odd match" or whatever but the reality is that to them I'm interesting, and my face being average to above average tier helps when I'm a bit unusual/ on the spectrum.
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>>26123334
Never fear rowboat, I've worked in retail for about 18 months and I can now deal with normals without freaking the heck out.

Just b urself
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>>26127288
>can now deal with normals without freaking the heck out.
>Just b urself

Yes, exactly like this. Everything will work out. I promise on my honor as a frog.
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>>26127311
In all seriousness, I concentrated on making stories for the customers benefit and relating to them that way and I was beloved by several regular customers who insisted that I serve them as opposed to my co-workers.

tl;dr just lie to the normals, they can't tell or they don't care. Either way works.
>>
>Observe social settings
>mimic responses that have positive outcome
>done

easy
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>>26127360
>I was beloved by several regular customers who insisted that I serve them as opposed to my co-workers.

That must have been a good feel.
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>>26127425
not so easy when your mind goes blank when people engage conversation
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>>26127445
I used to do that, think of it like a challenge or game and invent rules in your head like points for laughter or whatever you like
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>>26120932
This, the mania keep the calm exterior human
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Jesus the two are gonna want it at the same time ffs
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>>26126636
>>26127171
>>26127675
you seem like a full on normie
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>>26120344

Me. Im 1.88, fit and incredibly handsome 9/10.
But I got avpd and I'm disgusted by women behaviour. Whenever I'm outside woman (and some men) stare and smile at me, making comments about my looks. The amount of female hair I got thrown in my face and the amount of shoulder rubs by strange women I get...
Oh and the times I could steal smartphones and handbags from women in public places, because they trust me with their stuff while going to the 'bathroom'. One day if I'm broke I just take their money and beat it.

I used to be a beta shy glass wearing nerd during my younger years. But ever since I started lifting and eating, woman commented my on my looks. But that avpd man... It's crippling...
>>
>get job as software engineer
>invited to coworkers birthday
>singles night at the bar, hotties everywhere
>one of them is looking at me while i'm ordering a drink and smiling
>daydream about happy life with her, coming home from work and helping to make supper, playing video games with the kids, helping them with homework etc.
>supporting each other emotionally and helping each other achieve life's goals and genuinely be happy
>what if my penis isn't big enough to make her happy
>she probably banged dozens of guys with bigger dicks
>she's probably not smiling at me, she's probably laughing at me internally, barely able to contain it
>laughing whore, that bitch!
>start trembling from anxiety, spaghetti spill off the mainland imminent
>get my drink and rush back to table with friends
>conversation switches from music and movies to sexual conquests and college parties
>i was super chatty before and now am dead silent, feel like i should make up some bullshit to fit in
>decide to just sit there and finish my drink
>drink done, is that girl gone so i can go back to the bar for another?
>she's still there, oh fuck, what do i do...

still passing as normie, but at what cost
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>>26127930
i think you're just a pussy fag
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>>26127831
you are just self aware, there is nothing wrong with that
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>>26127930
I can relate. Cyborg life is hell.
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>>26127425
too many variables senpai, whats good in one situation is bad in another
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>>26124798
>"Hey, your name is ______, right? We met at ______."

sounds like a recipe for failure
one thing i learned about normies is they only appreciate you based on the number of other normies that appreciate you
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>>26120344
Me. I am 1.89m tall, reasonably athletic, 9/10 face model body etc good fashion sense. The only problem is that I come from a poor family, fucked a girl in a relationship. I can't afford most things because I'm average intelligence and work shit jobs and come from a poor family etc. I appreciate everyone's humour on this board and love the shitposts being REAL posts the most. I also love the guy posting the hotel california stuff every fucking week lmfao
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>>26127953
fuck off normie scum

tfw have to click "i am not a robot" to post
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>>26120344
Yup, I can.
I'm muscular (3 years lifting), lean, great hygiene, not beautiful but definitely not unnattractive, if I drink enough I become chatty and open enough to pass as friendly and outgoing. Dress normally, don't have autism, know enough about socially acceptable behaviour.

Inside I am a fucking broken mess it's not even funny.
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>>26121977
>if conversation is dying off say with some confidence you have to do some random shit

hahahahha

>Hi normie what's up?
>Oh hi anon, not much, you?
>Not much either!
>.....
>I HAVE TO DO SOME RANDOM SHIT
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>>26120344

>talking to some guys and qt grills in class
>she: "so anon what do you do after school?"
>mfw
>"oh, n-nothing much.."
>guy: "oh yeah you hang out with that friend of yours, right?"
>"n-no, we're j-just friends at school"
>she: "so what do you do?"
>"just st-stay at home really"
>she: "oh. hmm."
get me off this ride
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>>26120717
He wanted you

>Normies regularly approach me.
you're probably attractive
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>>26128314
gays always hit on me despite never being noticed by woman

idk its not always correlated
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>>26128242
>>Hi normie what's up?
>>Oh hi anon, not much, you?
>>Not much either!

---

Yeah, what do you do after this? I always spaz out inside
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>>26128299
any undercover robot got a good answer for that question?
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>>26128405
ask him about exams
normies love talking about grades

in that order:
exams/grades
sports
parties
computer games (this option is reserved to how nerdy the guy is but you can make friends based on vidya alone)
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>>26128381
refer to the situation. if you're at work refer to any meetings or shit that needs to be done. if you're at a restaurant refer to it or what food you'll get.
if you've already done that, such as already told the hairdresser what kind of cut you want famm, then ask about what they've been up to recently, and be a bit more specific such as "this past weekend?"
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>>26128299
When this question comes up I try to appear confident and answer honestly, ex. I sit at home all day doing nothing and am usually bored. Works but depends on the normies really. try it.
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>>26127205
Holy shit this guy is me
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>>26128436
I can do school conversations but
>don't know shit about sports
>don't go to parties
[spoiler[>don't play vidya[/spoiler]
>>
>>26128616
cars is a good one
i would put cars even above sports, if you know alot about cars it can automatically make you socially accepted (i know its retarded as fuck but that's the world for you)
>>
>>26120344
how do we create a society where everybody gives 0 fucks and says whatever they want - like 4chan?
>>
>>26128737
This 100000x
I remember I was pratically an ugly chad at 6th grade because I was obsessed with cars
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>>26128787
wrong thread desu
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>>26120344
passing for normie in real life basically means you're a normie. what other life is there?
>>
>>26120344
Probably me. I can talk to people at cash registers.
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