ITT: Typing family gatherings
>Hey Anon! Why don't you get your uncle another beer?
>little cousin says you look like a future plumber
Plumbers make good money you spoiled rich little shit
>tfw your family doesn't try to talk to you and leaves you alone
They finally understand.
>Everyone talking at each other just for the sake of saying something
>Under-current feeling of everyone just waiting to die and get it all over with
My family members mostly like me, which is nice. The last time I had a family gathering my aunt and uncle started a discussion about my (absent) cousins' girlfriends and sex lives. When the conversation turned to me it was about ways I could kill myself if I ever went blind. I'm not even joking.
>So what are your plans for the future?
>family is all talking about one of my cousins having another kid
>debating who is gonna have the next one
>mfw they always say it's gonna be me
>don't have a gf
>haven't had one for a while
>they just think I'm gonna knock up a one night stand
>mfw have a decent job that pays a bit more then minimum wage AND go to college for computer science
>no gf ever but they never asked me about that anyway
>Hey Anon, why don't you give your uncle another one of those sloppy blowjobs with those slut lips of yours? Did you wear the panties I sent you for Christmas? Hah, you can show them to me later in the bathroom.
Easy comebacks for all of these that make you seem alpha
Get it yourself.
I stay in my room for a reason
I'm not your tech support.
There is actually no safe answer to this. They will mock your regardless.
Fucking this tbqfh
>Have family gatherings every year with aunts/uncles and grandparents and cousins
>First my 25 yo older sister gets a BF and he comes, and now he's part of the family basically. Call him Dean.
>18 yo younger sister gets BF, he's starting to become like family after 2 years. Call him Bob
>Ever since little sister's BF started coming to gatherings we've all had a group picture in the end.
>Every fucking time: "Hehe, now that your sisters have reeled Dean and Bob into the family, next year it'll be your turn anon!"
>Tfw they aren't trying to make fun of me and only think it's funny because they think I'm just too callous towards people in general to have a girlfriend.
>Tfw they have no clue that I actually want a family
>Tfw they haven't seen my social failures with women
>Tfw I've been rejected brutally twice and was a beta orbiter once for like 8 months before realizing that I was being a huge fag and that no girl would ever sleep with me.
>Tfw you just wear a blank look on your face as they're laughing, knowing that they mean no harm, but it still fucking hurts.
>It fucking hurts and nobody knows because you're trying to keep the facade of never having had a gf because you just weren't interested at all.
>In reality, you tried and failed.
I don't even mind family gatherings otherwise but this has to happen every fucking time.
>tfw no family
>no brothers, no sisters
>no uncles or aunts that live close to me
>no cousins either
>father died when I was 13
>mother died when I was 22
My family doesn't ask me about girlfriends or anything, they just talk about banal shit and occasionally ask me to weigh in on it. The times I say more than a few words are when the men go off and that's just because they give me beer. People talking in general though just irritates me.