>Sometime during middle school
>Loner even back then
>Suddenly find note inviting me to a Halloween party
>Assume that the person who delivered the note put it in the wrong backpack, or that it was some sick fucking joke
>Started smoking weed at 15
It put the brakes on my life progress completely.
>Not completing my degree the 1st or 2nd time I attended university
>Getting drunk and getting into that fistfight at the Poker night
Lost me a lot of friends
>Not apologizing to her the day after
Stupid. How can someone so pathetic have too much pride? Fuck I hate being narcissistic.
>girl shows extreme interest to the point where they initiate every conversation between us
>never actually asked them out because too beta
This happened THREE different times in high school
>Have perfect average 5/10 gf
>break up with her because I want to fug otheir girls, and because people are telling me I can do better
>End up not fugging otheir girls
>get horny one night and want to fug
>pretend i want to get back 2gether
>break up with her again
>It was an applied science class, had a few good mates in the classroom.
>I used to be stuck in a fantasy world all of the time.
>at the time I was really into Saw, in fact I was really into it that I convinced my group in Drama class to do a 6 minute scene with a made up Saw scenario.
>maybe I'll share that later.
>any way, in science class I used to put these high stools and put it over my head and pretend that I was in a Saw trap and walk around and talk to people while humming the Saw theme.
>nobody made fun of me for it, and one of my stoner friends kept laughing like "dude wtf are you doing?"
>I laugh it off, put it down and continue doing what I was doing before I went into my fantasy world.
I did that a couple of times to be honest. I laugh about it now when I think of it, but it's pretty regrettable and something I should have not done.
But I remember one time in Grade 9 and I fucking hate myself for it.
>be in integrated technology class
>sitting at the computers doing fuck all.
>there's a girl in my class who I danced with in Grade 8 at a cross-school dance thing where different schools came to ours to dance.
>thought I would put the moves on her and try to woo her.
>walk behind her when she's sitting down.
>put my hands on her shoulders and start massaging her.
>she quickly turns around and says "oh my god what the fuck are you doing, you freak?!"
>my stomach fell flat, went frozen and quickly turned around and walked to my chair.
>my friend witnessed it and asked me "what the fuck was that?".
>I told him that I thought she'd like that.
>never make eye contact with her again.
>talk with girl once in 7th grade
>continue to talk occasionally up through highschool
>frequently get very sexual in conversation
>send nudes often
>"anon we need to hook up sometime"
still haven't hooked up
Maybe I should have saved these for a cringe thread, as they're not really bad as a few of your stories.
The things I regret the most would probably be acting "oblivious" (I keep telling myself I was oblivious, but I wasn't) towards girls who had great interest in me. I always talked to them drunk and it was the only time.
I regret dropping out of University, and regret getting fired at my previous job (hotel general management). It was a great gig and I was really good acquaintances with my boss and his parents.
>any way, in science class I used to put these high stools and put it over my head and pretend that I was in a Saw trap and walk around and talk to people while humming the Saw theme
Holy shit anon
Keep sharing please.
It makes me feel less lonely knowing someone has done the same shit I did.
>In basic music theory class
>teacher is a control freak
>won't let you ever leave without permission
>taking test on scales or something
>suddenly I have to piss
>it'll be fine, just have to raise my hand
>five minutes later
>notice teacher is fucking SLEEPING
>feel like saying something
>exceptional social awkwardness
>can't get anything out
>in both ways
>just sit there with my hand raised for awhile
>water works drip slowly
>right onto the binder I use for everything
>binder makes loud noises as it goes
>entire class looks at me as pit patter happens
>someone says "smells like piss"
>teacher wakes up
>evacuates class room
>staff help me
>give me sweat pants
>walk out after school
>EVERYONE OBVIOUSLY KNOWS
Was sitting to the second girl I ever liked too.
Binder smelled for days.
oh god! i lived exactly your life! i know that feel, i will never forgive myself...
>emo fag through school
>sacrificing medical school for pot
>dropping out and failing my second attempt at the moment
>fist fight with a good friend over a religious argument
>still have pride
>to this day i loath pic related
i am a pathetic shit, i am trying to fix myself though... stay strong anon...
>have adorable qt 3.14 gf
>literally my type which I never thought someone like her would settle for me
>become really social because of her over the next two years
>get invited to hang out with her friends when even she's not around because they actually like me
>her cousin offers me a position at the bank he works at
>"yeah anon you seem like a really dedicated person!"
>first job is great job
>make more friends
>start making plans to move out of shitty parents house with gf
>holy shit this is happening
>gf goes to visit family overseas
>friends want to have guys night
>i'm thinking a bar or something
>it's a house party
>at least i have friends with me
>they're all high in an hour
>tell me to take a hit
>i've smoked before so whatever okay
>it's not like before
>i feel really weird and dizzy
>everything's a mess and there people everywhere
>end up with some random girl on me in the basement
>shit definitely happened
>tell gf when she comes home
>she doesn't even scream at me or hit me
>she just cries
>i've never wanted to die more than that moment
>lose all friends
Why am I such a fuck up. Why didn't I just stay home. What makes me hate myself even more is she didn't tell her family what happened. I went into that job to quit thinking her cousin was going to beat the shit out of me. He didn't even know. She just said "things didn't work out". Like, she's protecting my name. She still cares about me and I want to die.
>Hit on my oneitis sister
I wanna kill myself every time I think of that moment.
What happened isn't your fault man. There was no way you could have known your friends would hand you something laced with something nasty.
Your guy friends are shit. You did nothing wrong. They fucked you over.
>Not getting braces about a decade ago
>Didn't prevent my parents from moving into a shitty rural area where basically zero good services exist
>Fall into the MMO trap several times and ruin my grades forever, fail a whole course
Now I'm a 21 year old KV that can't even attend college, just kill me already.
>grade 3 or so
>desks of class at lunch hour all arranged in a circle
>a random teacher walks in
>she talks to the class
>asks if anyone is named such and such (i forget, i think it was a peculiar irish name or something)
>i'm thinking about impressing this girl named christina
>i say to the teacher that's my name
>she says really??
>i yell really loudly NOT!!!!
i got a whole bunch of em boys.
I regret everything, everything I've ever done. However since becoming a robot, I feel very bad for bullying this poor white trash girl in elementary school along with everyone else who always wore this American Idol hoodie. I'm sorry Cynthia. No one should have to be bullied.
A lot of stuff is repressed, but I do remember one story where I felt completely fucking pathetic.
>In Grade 6, fat tubby little kid, a bit taller than everyone hells, but had a huge baby face.
>school trip to a ski resort.
>mom thinks this would be a good experience for me. I think so too.
>never skied in my entire life.
>trip is about 2 hours out of town. nervous as hell on the drive there.
>get there, get my rentals and was told to practice on the bunny hill.
>"ok, just remember that South Park episode - if you french fry when you should pizza, you're gonna have a bad time.
>there are mini lifts going up the bunny hill.
>oh fuck me.
>try to go on mini lift up; scared as hell.
>fall to the side of lift and roll down the hill.
>people on standby fucking laugh at me.
>oh fuck this. "hold back your tears, you can fucking do this".
>go practice on a hidden hill far away from the bunny hill where nobody can see me.
>keep falling on my ass, but getting better.
>classmates notice me and say "hey, what are ya doing? Come join us on this hill!"
>"haha okay sure guys..."
>Get on ski lift and brought to Blue Square.
>"I am not fucking ready for this".
>lift is up to the top.
>instantly biff out trying to stand on my skiis, and roll over to sides.
>"what the fuck am I doing" at this point holding back my tears.
>Classmates are already gone off and now I'm stuck up here.
>I'm screwed at this point, I can't fucking do this.
>attempt skiing down it.
>biff out almost immediately and roll a little ways down.
>bawling my eyes out because I'm a loser.
>start rolling down and pretending I have an injury.
>snowmobile instantly comes and puts me on a stretcher and brings me down to the base.
>older kids start laughing, and the mountain medic people ask if I'm hurt.
>"n-no i'm okay."
>get my skiis taken off and told to go hang out in the villa lobby.
>cry in the bathroom for a while, get myself fries and gravy for lunch and play two arcade machines for the rest of the day.
>Started doing opiates around 2010
>got into doing H around 3 yrs ago
> Best friend at the time od'ed off shooting 5 bags
>she was gorgeous but turned into a wreck
>still getting high. Must stop getting.
>recently quit doing H. A week now
>popping percs tonight
>gf hates me half the time
Aint life grand boys. Cheerio
I still feel responsible. I haven't smoked since high school, I could've just said no. I didn't think they knew that batch was laced with something either. They just wanted me to have fun.
When I told her she asked if it was her fault; if she did something wrong. No, I'm just a complete hopeless fuck that never had a chance with her. I can't go back to the depressing life I had before after knowing how great it is to wake up happy everyday.
Well, I'm a KHV that is so autistic I can't manage a conversation with most people on Omegle. I'm a NEET, college dropout, and non-drug user. I am unsure of my dream but part of me wants to seriously become a wizard hermit. I spend 10 hours a day on here and play TF2 with the rest. I am very restrained and sensitive and feel a connection to threads like ones where the OP feels really bad for getting insulted in games online. I raged inwardly at the normans who shat up the 50 wizard's thread yesterday. I've never been able to have a normal friendship. I recognize I can be sadistic but it appalls me what society does to nonconformists. End rant.
>driving home that one night instead of crashing on my brother's couch
Now I have a criminal record.
>smoking weed/doing untold amounts of DXM/bingeing on adderall/drinking a fifth of vodka a day for months on end
Who knows how much damage I did to my body and my brain. At least I'm sober now and want to stay clean because my life and mental state is simply better that way.
>not giving a fuck for the last three semesters of high school
Now I go to a mediocre school
>choosing English as my major
No need to explain here.
>not asking out any girls in high school
Know for a fact I could have gotten someone, now I'll never know what young love is like.
>Killing all those bugs when I was a kid
This one is stupid, but I still feel pangs of guilt about it sometimes.
>not going into that chick's house after our second date when she told me her "parents weren't home" and then awkwardly kissing her on her front porch and walking away, after which I never heard from her again
Went full autist there.
>not getting diagnosed for ADHD and aspergers when I was younger
This one's on my doctors, but still, who knows where I'd be if I'd gotten help sooner
I like to repress things too.
It sometimes keeps me up at night.
Also, I went skiing once too.
>Get practically dragged by family on trip.
>Go to camp ground with camper.
>Family complains about boredom.
>I was really okay with my DS but whatevs.
>Turns out ski hill nearby.
>Thirty minutes later we arrive.
>Suit up, feeling pretty cool.
>Put on skis not so cool.
>No coordination whatsoever.
>Spend a hour trying to stand.
>Rest of family keeps on egging me on.
>Eventually, they leave me behind.
>Get the hang of it finally.
>"Alright, anon, you can do this!"
>No lift, just a rope to pull you up.
>Manage to grasp it keep myself up.
>Slightly surprised by my dexterity.
>Realize I don't know when to let go.
>Reach the very fucking top.
>Turns out you just stop at your comfort level.
>Top is hardest part of course.
>First time skiing ever.
>Tell myself this is the only way down.
>Two seconds in, fall down.
>Steep as shit, roll all the fucking way down.
>FALLING DOWN A STEEP ASS COURSE.
>People watch as I suffer.
>They just watch.
>End up in ditch next to course, near bottom.
>Lay there for a long ass time, bleed a bit.
>Family eventually finds me.
>Get taken to hospital.
>Bruised bones, and a fracture.
>Btw, family had to pay for gear.
>Broke the skis it turns out.
>Family just continues with vacation.
>Brother berates me for wasting time.
>Feel miserable is so many different ways.
I hate my family.
Still take me on vacation though.
I fucking hate it.
>already constantly buying 4 dollar nicks to roll up in blunts
>oh thats crack i need a nick
>sees syringe in wommans house with stamp bag of dope
>cant hit vein so just do muscle shot in arm
>get gf in high school
>life and reality hits me all at once as I grow up
>realize everything is shit
>literally can't be happy, no reason to be
>gf supports me for 2 years
>decides it's too much for her
>dumps me because I'm a black hole ot be around
>no gf since
>no goals in life
>time is running out, can't stay with parents forever
You don't realize what you have til it's gone.
> tfw regret wearing loose boxers when there was a chance of getting pants'd.
>tfw regret not insulting a girl back who bullied me daily for no reason in middle school
>tfw regret saying no to the girls who asked me out or flirted with me
>tfw regretful over being clumsy in general and insecure
>good friend of mine for years has hot younger sister
>she dates friends of mine while I'm friends with him
>she gets hotter, is 20
>it's been years since she's been with anyone I know
>she seems to be flirting with me very obviously one time recently
>next time I see her I basically say "come to my place and let's get drunk sometime" IN FRONT OF HER BROTHER, MY FRIEND
>she leaves awkwardly, friend tries subtly shutting me down, drunk me just doesn't care
>haven't talked to either in weeks
Yeah I'm pretty retarded.
Fuck skiing. I think I went again to the same place sometime in early high school with a few friends.
One of my friends hated skiing or snowboarding, and I was too scared to attempt anything, so we played the arcade machines all day.
I'm honestly glad I didn't get shit talked for that chair thing in science class. I considered myself social with all of the cliques and was considered the funny, nice, big guy so nobody didn't say much other than "yeah he's a little weird, but he's a good guy!"
Oh hey me too. During the class or did you step out? First day of a writing class I found out we were gonna introduce ourselves. I stepped out, went to find a bathroom, only found a girl's, went in and puked, girl sits in stall next to me, steathily make my way to the sink to swish out mouth and blow out nose when another girl walks in, turn my back to her, she freaks and walks out, clean up and left. Shit was fucking awful.
a ~23 year old woman OD on heroin and is kill because I wouldn't call her
>Last high school year
>Got letter from a classmate
>It was a cute love letter full of cute things
>Things you'd only dream to hear from a girl
>Shit like "I dreamday about us together watching a sunset"
>I asked for who sent it to the person that gave it to me
>He said it was a girl in a couple of grades lower then us but she didn't know her
>Didn't pursue any further, just waited her to show up
>She never did
I still wonder what it could have been.
At least you got to do it in private.
The only time I saw someone puke in class it was near fucking instantaneous. And he had a grapefruit before hand so we all thought he was fucking dying or something.
Heavy. I feel for you man.
>have qt3.14 little sister
>never get close to her
>around middle school she changes
>apparently she thinks she's transgender
>lose my only sister in family of seven
>to a fucking cultural fad
>worst part is she already had surgery
I regret everything I didn't help her through
Wait, it happened in class? Dude I stepped out, and sure I have to deal with the embarrassment of puking in a girls' restroom, but I'll tell you if you did it in the class they'll never forget. First day class maybe some dropped but you'll be known as "that guy" who popped in the first day.
Christ I need anxiety pills this shit is so fucking miserable. Saying my name and major shouldn't drive me to vomiting yet it does.
She always treated me like shit. I cut all ties with her for good reason. She was trying to guilt trip me into letting her be my girlfriend/friend/whatever to make up for what she did to me or else she would kill herself. And she did kill herself. People were calling me, begging me to talk her out of it. But the people calling me were the normies that had also treated me like shit in the past. They begged me, going on and on about how they would make things right with me. "It's too late for that now," I said.
I regret nothing. Things couldn't have happened any other way. This is destiny.
>be in Grade 11 math class.
>sat near the front, second row horizontally, third row vertically from the teachers desk.
>lax as fuck class, teacher barely did any teaching. basically a fuck all class
>he has a hot wife though, so he was living good.. until he got divorced.
>sit behind a really cute girl from the country side, blonde hair, nice thin body with a petite bum.
>her name is Brandy.
>here I am, chubby, but tall guy and always talk with her if I'm not with my friends.
>after a while we start talking every day for a bit, and as each day passes we talk about relationships, girls for me, boys for her and her break up with her bf.
>one day we get really into the dirty talk.
>says how she loves being cuddled and wishes she has a guy right now to do that.
>ask her where the kinkiest place to have sex would be.
>"Hmmm.. i think underneath the stairwell down the hall would be pretty hot."
>have a huge ass boner going on right now.
>thinking to myself "holy fuck this is hot".
>she asks me where I would think the hottest place to make out/have sex would be.
>being chill and cool at the time, I tell her that I made out with a classmate in the Green Room during my drama class.
>she tells me "bravo" or something, she's a little proud and has a realy sexy look on her face.
>"why didn't you go any further?" she asks.
>"we were working on a 4 way project and the other two partners came back from asking the teacher a question".
>she acts really cute and says "awww.. you know I've always wanted to give someone a bj in that room".
>dick is hard as fucking diamonds right now.
>I ask her "so do you prefer big dicks or smaller ones?"
>"what the fuck am I asking".
>"i love small ones, they fit right in the mouth and it can stay in there.".
>precum happens, not a big deal, no big stain or nothing.
>it's near the end of the class.
>come on you fucking pussy, ask her to do some naughty shit with ya or something.
>bell rings, we're dismissed.
>"See you tomorrow, Anon"
>Know really pretty girl from college
>Later start working at the same place as her out of coincidence
>Years go by and we only talk when we see each other, nothing special
>Christmas time last year she starts flirting with me
>She'd broken up with her long time boyfriend after he cheated on her
>Complete retard about these sorts of things but eventually work up the courage to ask her to a movie
>End up going with her friend and that girls boyfriend
>Talk quite a bit in the car afterwards
>Become fairly close in the next few weeks
>Texts me one night while I'm at work and she's at a party telling me she wished I was there with her
>Shoot myself down and fuck it all up
>Later that night texts me (drunk) at 3 in the morning telling me she wished I was there with her
>Says some sensual shit
>Still so retarded I blow it off and act nonchalant and friendly rather than go for it
>At her house one night a little while later
>At one point she lays down next to me
>2 inches from my face
>Giggles and cuddles into me and takes my phone, acting playful
>Still do nothing
>She thought I wasn't interested
>She went for my friend
>They're still together
>Talking about children and marriage
>Say they can't imagine a wedding without me present
>I'm transferring locations just so I can get away from her now because the pain of seeing her is too much anymore
I fucked it up because I was too afraid of being wrong. I didn't think any girl would ever be interested in me. I'm an awkward skellington and I don't consider myself particularly attractive, but she was and I fucked it up. I was too afraid.
If you have chances that seem obvious in the future robots, fucking take them. These memories are agony.
>"HURRY THE FUCK UP AND ASK NOW! YOUR DICK IS HARD AND YOUR HORNY AS FUCK!"
>do nothing. grab my binder, stand up and non nonchalant cover my crotch area.
>"y-yeah see you tomorrow for sure"
>she walks away, turns around at the door and winks at me.
>a lot of classmates are still sticking around, two of my friends asked me "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?".
>"what do you mean? You heard everything?"
>"you guys were fucking loud talking, man. Even Calder heard you bro".
>He sits at the very last row closest to the door.
>Immediately look at my teacher.
>he's a little flushed in the face, looks at me and gives me a smirk.
>holy fuck the entire class literally heard us talking naughty shit for 20 minutes.
>never ended up doing any shit with her.
>never talk sexy like that again.
>the teacher heard the entire thing and didn't say anything.
>nobody said anything.
I bet he got turned on too, and everyone else listening.
>mfw the entire time.
I feel your pain man. Holy shit I know how that feels. Girls used to come to me but I did nothing about it, and now when I approach girls they seem interested but really it's like "uh no".
My luck run out i guess.
My luck with girls is hit or miss. I'm still a kissless virgin but it's because I've denied every girl that's ever wanted anything with me. Some have wanted just sex, some have had crushes on me and shit but I'm always too afraid to make anything of them.
I had very little family and few friends growing up. My mother was distant and never was a loving parent. My father was okay and tried to make up for it but I still never received hugs or kisses or was told I was loved or anything. Now I have problems with intimacy and affection. I'm too afraid to seek it out even though I've wanted it ever since I was a little kid.
Even if I could go back in time to the very beginning, early last December, I don't think I'd be able to. I cannot say the words I want to say and I can't take it further. There's a wall I can't get past.
>be me a few years ago
>Huge football game
>walking back from concessions with friends
>Clique of older girls sitting on platform by bleachers
>"Hey anon she wants to talk to you"
>mfw I say "hey" Just being a normal person
>"how are you?"
>"Fine, thank you"
>mfw she says "She likes you"
>mfw all the girls start laughing right in front of me
>mfw I have no comeback
>mfw I awkwardly walk away from conversation, while they keep laughing
>mfw I don't understand what's so funny
>Friends witnessed the whole thing
>tfw I should've known better
Here's a repressed memory from middle school I managed to dig out:
>end of the year
>pseudo-friend with this spergy kid
>spergy kid was going to do comedy for the show
>I strongarm my way into being his "hype man"
>stood on stage while he said terrible jokes and just repeated the punchlines
>got booed off stage
>cried in the bathroom
I regret ever trying to be a normie. It was just a "howdy, fellow kids!" situation every time I tried to level with normal people, and then that was the kindling for all my depression in school.
>Grade 7/8, not sure which now
>Make embarrassing bad flat cardboard NES, SNES, and GBA
>Something a 13/14 year old shouldn't be doing
>Cousin is two years younger and has a science fair coming up
>Come up with the bright idea to enter my cardboard trash, completely oblivious to how much it would make her look like a loser
>She actually fucking does it because she listens to me for some reason
>Science fair day
>Come to the display of embarrassment
>Get told I need to present it with her cause she put my name on it too
>The feeling of "you fucked up"' dread comes on
>Everyone is smirking or snickering
>The smartest girl in the class starts shitting on it hard, asking how it's science, where's the research, etc
>Get ridiculed for this the rest of the week, no idea how it affected my cousin
I matured at half the rate you're supposed to. I was that retarded guy no one liked, not even robots.
This Muslim girl was attracted to me, I think?
She used to sit really close to me and we'd crack a lot of jokes.
It was my first month in a new school, in a new country.
Eventually pushed her away cus I had eyes for this qt white girl.
Doesn't matter anyways, her brothers were legit terrorists and probably would've beheaded my infidel head
Nigga, you gay
Braces help your oral health, but it has done 0 for my confidence.
I legit have a 9/10 pearly white smile, but have very few emotions and spend most of my life wishing for death
>first week of uni
>get notice saying to come pick up package
>delivery is time sensitive blah blah blah
>don't have energy to deal with post office lady
>don't really want to do anything but go to class and sleep
>not really eating well
>sort of assume there has been a mixup and doubt that anybody would be sending me anything
>two weeks later, mom calls me upset and tells me that the care package she sent me had been return to sender-ed
>asks me if I knew what happened
>I lied and said I didn't know and that the post office probably fucked up
>On top of feeling alone, now feeling guilty too
I didn't know it at the time, but that experience was a very good metaphor for what the following four years would be like.
This. Only time I ever had someone give me encouragement for something unrelated to school was when my sensei took me and my dad aside and said he thought I could be competitive in a few years. I was 12. He was a legit Okinawan dude. Funny as hell. My dad, like a sperg, thought he was scamming us and I soon dropped out for mental health reasons. For some reason, I just remember my dad saying that he was lying to me and that I needed to take people's polite compliments with a grain of salt. Little did I know that quitting martial arts would leave me with even fewer role models and social supports to counterbalance the influence of my horrible parents.
being the reason a family member is ridiculed is shitty
I'd say I could relate but my family is the reason I was laughed at in school
>first day of high school
>zero friends from middle school
>first lunch time comes
>instead of just waiting in the classroom and following the first male group that forms I instead sperg out and go look for my sister
>she's in her final year and i hang out with her and her group of waster friends
>2 sluts (sister is one) and a bunch of loser chads who all mock me for hanging out with them and not making my own friends
>continue hanging out with them every lunch time and become "that guy who hangs around with his sister"
>next year sister is gone
>first lunch time sit alone in the bathroom eating my lunch
>continue doing this every lunch time until I finish hs
>I was "that guy who disappears at lunch"
>i now have zero social skills and am unable to this day approach a group of people that already know each other
Goddamn it I had two separate occasions where all I had to do was wait an extra 5 minutes in a classroom
The second time I could have just waited there, hung out with one of the guy groups and endured being mocked a bit for being weird my first year but I DID IT AGAIN
>move to a new school in 7th grade
>first day of school, going home
>girl, I think she's cute but peoppe on r9k would call her 4/10, asked me if she could sit with me
>awkwardly turtle in my seat
>next day, she sits in front of me for the whole year
>share all of my classes with her
>even though it's in my head, my heart can't speak out
>last day of school
>she's getting off the bus
>I say nothing
>I start crying
>my window is open
>girl behind me tells me to put up my window
>can't, I am crying
>everyone on the bus looks at me
>I move schools because I tell my mom I was bullied
She died two years ago in a car accident
My probably biggest regret is not visiting a doctor sooner during highschool. I had terrible, absolutely horrid cystic acne back then and if I just went to some dermatologist sooner I could have been on that sweet acutane and have a mucj better school life. I got mocked every single day and the only thing which kept people from straight out beating my shit in was the fact that I was a fairly big kid during this time. Still, one of the worst experiences:
>during summer break
>parents always push me to go to the beach
>"the sun will dry your acne up, you will see anon"
>while we are at it, believing my parents is a huge regret too
>I give in finally, partly due to them getting vicious and nearly acting like the bullies in school
>go to the beach and spend some days in the sun
>of course I get a terrible sunburn
>after I get home and sleep for a night the picture I saw next morning in the mirror vanished from my mind through gods little show of mercy
>it was lovecraftian amounts of horror I witnessed when I looked at my swollen, red, pus ridden face
>of course due to sun exposure the acne itself worsened aswell
>school started not even a week later
>still look terrible
>even the bullies are visibly uncomfortable with the amounts of embarassment radiating from me
>one of them finds his voice after the first lesson
>comes up to me and says :"Anon what the hell are you doing, just go home, this is ridiculous"
>still go to school for the whole week
>get my shit pushed in hard during that time
>atleast I already forgot the details
I guess that is also the main reason I do not want any children, my genetics cause nothing but misery.
I feel all of those man. Minus the bug thing, but literally everything else. And I'm probably older than you (28). Your post resonates with me, and you just made me sad. Protip: it doesn't get better, it gets worse.