Time Machine

Anybody? Anybody at all?
this is a very original comment, so original my head exploded

I'll buy a fuckload of bitcoins when they were cheap.

I'd go to the future and stay there if it's cool.
You know, virtual reality, spaceships, super advanced computers, futuristic music. Sounds pretty badass.

Depends on how it works, would I stay with my current self or would I be my younger self? Would there be different time lines?

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>>26091630
I like this idea too. Personal jetpack and AI waifu hologram. Count me in.

>>26091735
You stay your current self. You can meet you from the past and hang out with him without causing a time paradox. you can change the future, but it won't change until you return to your current time.

>>26091070
Go back to last year and stop my mate killing himself

>Love you ryan

>Go back to 2001
>stop 9/11 from happening

Who wants to come with me?

>>26091765
In that case I'll go rape the girl who used to bully me and drag her to the dark ages and sell her to some rich horny asians.

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>>26091783
Count me in!

My picture isn't important, it's just a cat to make thisp ost original.

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>>26091070
>help my teenage self with high school
>teach myself better morals
>tell him to not fuck up again and to leave august alone
>meet my mom again before she dies
>meet my step brother before he dies

Tell myself too not smoke spice.

>>26091813
i like your cat. He can come too.

Not become fat

>>26091070
>go back to 4th grade
>tell myself to stop eating like a fatty
>tell myself to not fuck up relationship with loyal protogf
>tell myself to play sports
>tell myself to not spend all of my fucking money on games

Also OP I just got a kitty that looks just like that kitty

>>26093007
It's a cute type of kitty. I miss him. His name was Lucky.

>>26091070
That depends.

But honestly at this point, I would probably try to just stop myself from existing. It's a strange feeling, different even than suicidal.

Alternatively I might travel to the future first to see if there is anything out there to make me happy.

>>26091070
Tell me more about Tommy. I knew a Tommy at 13 in 2001 that became a massive faggot later.

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if I had a time machine I would go back to the point it was invented and smash it with a hammer and say it should never be invented or the world is doomed.

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Remember all those times girls interacted with you, and only years later you realized they wanted the D? well, I suppose most of you didn't experience it, but I did several times, and I'd take advantage of some prime jailbait.

I would also spoil the last 3 Harry Potter books online, so Rowling would have to actually make an effort and write a decent ending to the series.

>bitcoins, lotto numbers
>and thats all

>>26094088
Originally I started hanging out with Tommy because we were both into fantasy and wizards and shit. He was half Arab or something, like he had a white mom and an Arab dad, except I don't think they were particularly religious since I never saw his mom or sister wearing the headscarf things.

Tommy was a little bitch. He spread rumors about people for no reason, including his close friends. I think he just wanted to stir shit up.

1. Told everyone I beat up Ronnie, one of the tough kids. People believed him for some reason since Ronnie came to school the next day with a black eye from his drunk dad beating him (How the fuck did Tommy know that would happen?!?) so then Ronnie had to prove that he wasn't a loser and kicked my ass after school.

2. New kid from New Jersey (I live in Connecticut) moved into the neighborhood later that year. He had the same name as me. Tommy tried to say I wanted to fight him over "Who was the better Johnny". I had to do a shitload of explaining to him that Tommy as just stirring things up and being a little bitch.

3. When I gave him my E-mail, he put me on every fucking spam list he could find and used MY e-mail address to register on some fucked up porn forum. My dad periodically checked my e-mail, just because he had no sense of privacy or boundaries, and he got mad as hell when he saw that and thought I was looking at naked Arabian girls.

4. Not sure why I was still friends with him at this point, but I tried to get Tommy into Magic: The Gathering. I let him borrow my deck with my Sengir Vampires. He stole it and sold all the cards. Never talked to me again after that.

Last I heard, Tommy fucked up his heart taking human growth hormone pills to try to make himself taller since he wished he could be tall enough to be an actor. (This makes no damn sense to me, plenty of actors are manlets) I think he had a neck aneurism or a stroke or something. I'm not too good on the details since this was long after I cared.