>>26018240 I've been depresse before but I wouldn't call me depressed right now. I have social anxiety to the point I have to take meds and even then can't focus with people around me or keep a normal dialogue.
Completed highschool and have a degree from a vocational university. I ive right now in a farily big city.
I have a family and without them I would probaly have killed myself a long time ago.
I also have a speech disorder and hearing impairments. So just listening or saying something to someone make me exhausted. I don't even have normal dialogue with my family members because I can't.
>24 KHHV >Only friend invites me to watch a movie with him, his gf, a friend and friend's date >Tells me to bring a date >"Just ask one of the girls you have on facebook or something" >Only girls I have on facebook are either in a relationship or relatives (or both) I want to go because I almost never go out, but I feel like I'd just be a 5th wheel, awkwardly sitting there watching a movie while the others fool around with their girl.
>tfw James Dean died when he was only 24 and became an icon >tfw Alexander the Great conquered so much before he even turned 30 >tfw I will never achieve an ounce of that kind of greatness even when I'm 90 years old
>>26018032 > spend last 2 years in my room (parents house) > almost 27 > just cant seem to get on with my life
i don't know how i used to do anything. i guess i still wanted things enough that i could push through the hardships, but now i dont have enough desire or willpower, i just think everythings shit so i fester.. even though i want to change at the same time. so i don't get it.. just cant get unstuck desu senpai
>>26018773 Dude, please listen to what I say, i'll make it short, i was in the same situation than you in college, the girl left best friend and asked me out 1 week after that. Friend knew about it, and stupid me didn't realised what happened. Bro came to my room, punched me and then cried, I said i was sorry, I would dump her etc, he just left me looking with the eyes of rage and sadness. Next day, bro commited suicide and the girl had been beaten like shit by bros other friends. I just felt like dying. I got to the same hospital to say goodbye to the bro and the girl. Severe depression heppened, i left college (+i was being harrassed by everyone), never got any degree, never got any job, never got any wife and kids because of that. It only takes one think to ruin your life.
i don't have any friends anymore. I got so damn bored of those kids who listen to shit music and smoke weed all the time. I'm lucky enough to be good looking and have a great gf but she's only 15 and i can't really have deep conversations with her. All i wanted was some intellectual friends who i can talk about art and philosophy with but i never had them. I know this is not the right place to ask but where can i meet people like this? It seems all the guys my age are only interested in the newest rap music and getting their dick wet. I feel like an adult next to all these grown up people who still behave like children. I was at the buddhist center the other day and the people there were really nice and interesting but i don't know how to build friendships
>>26019251 damn dude that's heavy. it wasn't your fault though, remember that
friends chick was mental, he was a "captain save a hoe", she tried to get off with me the day she dumped him, i turned away and walked out the room. she just fucked another guy she just met. honestly, i dont even blame her, her dad died when she was like 12 so i see why she would have hardcore daddy issues.. feel sorry for them both to be honest
>>26018826 >It's not so cinch as you would think, my friend >My heart has nursed a hateful seed I fear
>Stands, she. in fervent block of mine. My death! >A plan was hatched, it's goal be grim, but scarce.
>Mark me. I fear hardly. My youth my kin! >Younger than I, in heart, in mind, in life.
>his mind, I fear, too young, for he.. FOR HER! >MARK ME, I say. She daren't know the truth! >She daren't hide her rage her rage for him. His wrongs. >It shall be my tool. I daren't bond now. >I wait. I wait for her. her rage be damned. >Damning HER. The child unfit to see truth. >he guides my strike. His truth, my cause. For mercy >His thanks, his plea. My aim. Absolution.
>>26019384 Thanks but still, thank you for being that cool to your bro. And even tough my parents, doctor etc told me it was not my fault, i still cannot forgive myself. I already have a mask and a helium bottle. I don't know for how long they are going to stay useless.
>it will never be 2007 - 2009 again >Vocaloid will never have that new, wonderful feeling again >Lucky Star will never be the greatest anime ever again >my music library will never just be Seikan Hikou, Hare Hare Yukai, World is Mine, Melt, Starry Sky, and Do Dai >niche internet Japanese stuff will never be so mysterious and confusing again >Nico Nico Douga will never feel like some kind of otherworldly playground again >Osu will never be brand new and hard as heck >Toradora isn't the greatest love story ever told anymore >4:3 browsing is dead >gachimuchi will never be ridiculous and hilarious again >no more 009 sound system, comic sans, notepad, hypercam unregistered videos >will never be simple minded enough to love lol so randumb MMD videos again >flash games aren't a thing anymore
>>26019441 I would love to study art and make films but i fucked up really bad in school. I'm almost 22 now and still didn't come any further than when i was 16 Wasted so many years as a neet and all it did was isolate me and make me an elitist asshole who thinks he's too good for everyone >>26019532 No i don't. What kind of stuff are you into? I'm really interested in exotic music, experimental film and fashion Also buddhism became a big topic on which i read many books and listened to countless lectures
>>26019517 Hey, I was just thinking about when i was a kid wanting to be an adult. How stupid was I. I miss those old stupid cartoons i used to watch I miss the friends woth woch my life used to be an epic andventure I miss my dad and mom I miss the years of highschool i spent playing vidya alone instead of being social I miss the days when 4chan used to be this underground funny place I miss being an ignorant I miss the girl who gave me my first and only kiss I miss my fun I miss happiness I miss everything Why ? Looking outside, people seems to have fun. How do they do ?
>Find out crush is not into me >Do not get over it, but manage to become functioning person after few months of not seeing her >Somehow we start texting each other more often >She invites me to this one thing >I see her for the first time after like 6 months >She is even more beautiful than i remember >I feel worse than i did ever before For past few weeks she is literally the only thing that keeps me going. I have some okay friends, i have okay family, i do good at uni. But i do not care about anything. I honestly do not feel single drop of emotion towards anything (or anyone) that is not her.
For fucks sake I have absolutely no motivation to do anything but count time until i see her again.
>You missed out on childhood friendships >You missed out on teenage friendships >You missed out on having fun and messing about in school due to constant social anxiety >Everything you took interest in has been ruined due to it being over popularised in the media. >You'll never be able to rewind time to change things or experience things again, this is the life you chose for yourself and you'll never be able to go back.
>>26019742 i got btfo by my crush when i was 18. i posted the story here but she led me to believe we were together for a few incredible months, then said we were friends when i asked her out. 7 years later, still into her.
my advice is try not to make it worse by looking at her facebook. sounds like you also may be depressed if you have no interest in anything else. be pragmatic, make lists of simple things to do that you feel will be somewhat productive and do them.. take small positive steps. also, if shes not into you, just stop torturing yourself with it. you think its romantic or cant get over it or the feels or whatever.. its sad but imo just move the fuck on, no other way about it. stop texting or seeing her..etc
>>26019803 I feel you senpai. I'm the guy you are responding to. We have known each other since we were little kids. And well she was awkward, shy, socially retarded, insecure girl that i could talk to for hours. She still is many of these things, but she is slowly changing. Sure she is 20 now, and she had only one boyfriend in her life (And i am not even even sure how far they got as they broke up after one summer) and she still is many of these things. She is still awkward and i can still talk to her for hours. But she is changing. She goes out more, she has more friends, she adds more pictures of her online and so on.
I am happy for her if she is happy, but i dont want her to become just another generic girl like hundreds of other stacies.
Oh and i forgot to mention she is just stunning and always was. And this is not some delusion of guy suffering to oneitis. Every time i introduce her to some of my friends they always tell me she is one of the most beautiful girls they have seen.
How girl like her does not get three boyfriends a month is beyond me
>>26019922 >7 years Damn mang. Only 3 and counting here Anyway, thanks for the advice. I hate myself for feeling this way, and i think i am pathetic and laughable for being such a fucking piece of shit turd. But i really cant get over here.
Closest i got to that was what i described not interacting with her for few months almost got me to start forgetting her. But then i see her once and its worse than ever before. And given how many friends and shit we share i will never stop seeing her entirely.
>>26020000 I'm the guy with oneitis, NICE QUADS at least you still talk to her I can't talk to mine anymore, I think she hates me she used to greet me everytime she saw me Then she started simply ignoring my existence fuck
>>26019968 I knew what i was getting into but i never met such a good girl before. She is so damn kind and loves me deeply as do i love her more than anything. Usually in my experience women play stupid games when you first meet them but it was so natural with her. You know just two people getting to know each other and finding love in the right place. She is quite mature for her age but i hate it when i have to meet her friends who are still kids in my eyes. Still i knew what i was getting into and it is way better than to be alone. In 3 years she will be 18 and i know how fast 3 years go by so i thought whatever
>>26018032 >do something stupid >involuntarily remember it all day Also >apartment lease is almost up at the end of this month >haven't found a place to move in yet >having trouble finding a place to move in because terrible credit and low income J U S T
>See a thread with no responses >Feel bad for OP so make a comment >Other people join in OPs thread giving him heaps of (You) >Feel happy enough and leave >Come back the next morning >Thread has 404'd >Read responses >Somebody is upset that nobody responded to their thread >Can't even look for poor anons dead thread
>>26020056 Depression is not easy you know and the bottle seems to stick to my hands. You remind me of when I was a kid, we got to visit a farm, and the farmer was kind and very sweet. And I asked him :"Sir, why do you smoke if this is bad ?" I never got an answer, but the look he gave me meant a lot of things.
>just want to create something, anything and show it to the world >not talented/motivated enough to be gud at drawing and music >don't have any friends or even acquaintances to make a film with >have fuckall money as well
The only idea I could possibly do is a form of documentary made through Skype (or another chat service). I'm thinking of making it about genuine outcasts and/or people manipulated and fucked over by society as a whole. But then again, those aren't the kinds of people to agree to interviews and the like.
>>26020104 I mean its not like I wasn't down to get fucked in the ass. its just it hurt a lot. Like buttholes are way tighter than I ever gave them credit for being and porn is lying when "it just went in". seeing as we've been doing MMF threesomes for a while now I knew this was coming, I just didn't think it would be this big of a pain in the ass.
>>26020139 Same here, some anon broke his anon identity saying he was about to commit suicide. No anwsers, but i found his name in the papernews two days later. (Can't remember the name tough, it was something like Brandy walsh)
>>26018032 So I met the girl I'm in love with today. She told me a couple of months ago that it couldn't be. I'm not sure I can love anyone else anymore; what is the point of a relationship when you know you will never feel anything like what i feel for anyone else?
>25 >only 1 friend, only thing we do is watch youtube and southpark >i look like a 5.5 at my best attempt to look good >have crippling mental illness, apparently its only manageable but not curable >only got laid once when my friends took me to a hooker when i was 18 >the only hobby that i have is 3D modeling and i do whatever i can to be good at it >i find people obnoxious, everyone thinks he is some kind of poor man's gandhi trying to give me life advices despite i probably know better than them >people are just shallow,unfunny,uncreative,not free thinkers,politcally correct assholes with a grain of bantz >everytime i talk to someone i feel like i already met a similar version of that person before >my biggest dream is that economy collapses so dumb bitches and politicians will stop getting free meals
>finally ask out the girl I've had a crush on for the longest time >set for Saturday >watch news 'blizzard is coming' >ohfuck hopefully I'll be able to leave my house >"winter storm jonas" finally hits >it's date day and i can't get out of my fucking house
>18 >Senior in high school >Graduating in 4 months >Desperately trying to lose my virginity before then >I'm actually not ugly and can get some girls if I really try (no Stacy tier girls, but girls) >Got a normie haircut, put gel in it, shaved, started putting effort into my appearance beyond the bare minimum >Girls have started taking interest, this black chick that sits near me suddenly out of nowhere starts talking to me as well as this other qt >All this preparation only to realize none of it changes the fact that I am still an autistic failed normie which is why I am a virgin in the first place
>tore a ligament in my knee last week >have to wait on surgery >can't walk anywhere, even to get food >nearly starving >can't leave at all, too depressed to do anything productive at home >broke nofap after a month long period >currently beating off 3+ times a day
>middle school >gf'ed one of the pretty girls >dontmessitup >one day she looks really bummed about something >supportivebfmode.exe >"what's wrong, babe?" >bummed to cracking up instantly >tells her friends >they tell their friends >can't walk down the halls without someone asking me "what's wrong, babe?" >that was my last relationship >i'm 29
Clinically diagnosed with major depression and anxiety from the age of 10, 19 now. I've been on and off of numerous amounts of drugs, none have helped except for alcohol. Throughout the 9 years I've built walls to keep myself from getting hurt if someone were to come into my life. I've pushed my entire family away and anyone who tries to get close to me. Except one person, a girl. I've known her for 2 years and she was my only friend but she fell for me, she's great in every way possible but since she expressed her feelings towards me I began to push her away. Less talking, shorter responses, etc, etc and because of this we haven't talked in a month not even a hello. Just needed to get this off my chest. Thanks for your time.
>>26020586 >in same situation except in Britain instead >just trying to lose my virginity before I'll probably never see any of the qts at my school again >do all of that >realize I'm a fat fuck with a terrible body >I probably ended up looking more fedora than anything
Now my plan is is to go full anorexia when I leave school in summer, then start lifting when I get to uni. Being a skinny fuck will still be hard, but it's just hard to being a fat fuck's Dante Must Die mode.
>>26020873 I'm the one who pushed her away and she's started looking for other people anyways. So It would just be superfluous. I've been perpetually sad for years now as well so months of sadness would be nothing new. I'm toxic anyways so in a sense she will be better off without me.
>>26020806 Dude, don't be like me. I was/am the same way and ended up in the same situation, somehow despite having no friends a girl started hanging around me. I made the wrong decision and completely avoided her, and now she's long gone and I majorly regret not trying for something.
>>26020993 I'm actually pretty fortunate, I eat a lot because of boredom and depression and I am not fat at all. Unfortunately I have gyno, which obviously severely limits my ability to get girls. I'm holding out hope if I do find a girl to fuck I can leave my jacket on so she won't notice my bitch tits, if she asks me to get completely naked she will almost definitely not let me fuck her when she sees.
>>26021040 NO. Fuck you. You have a girl, she wants you, she has told you she wants you, and shes great and you've already developed a friendship over 2 years. This is the fucking dream of every robot and could be the thing to help you and solve some of your intimacy issues, seriously fuck you and just do it. You have to at least TRY! Thats all anyone is asking of you, that you try. And you can try explaining the worries you have so you're fair to her. The reason normies are normies is they don't overthink everything, they don't expect to do everything perfectly first try and they make mistakes... but its still worth trying. No ones saying you have to be the perfect boyfriend, just try.
>>26021223 no it isn't though. she has feelings for you, she said that. that doesn't just change overnight even if she pretends it does. all you have to do it talk to her. if you don't like her then theres no problem, you're not into her.. but if you are, you can at least tell her the truth, and jsut say you said no because you were scared. she will understand, girls are good at feels/drama. text her if thats the only way you can do it. its not too late, stop fucking your own shit up with these goddamn excuses you've got opportunities here that a lot of robots would kill for
make a thread for it as well so we can see how it goes. we're rooting for you anon
>going into university after the summer (>inb4 underage, I'm 18) >won't have the obligation of school to keep me out of my room >am incredibly scared I'm just going to end up doing nothing but sitting around all day
Any days off I have (including weekends) are just me browsing 4chan and trying to enjoy vidya. I don't see how adding a lack of obligation and an entirely alien way of life with no 'friends' at all is going to help anything.
I don't know, but it just seems inevitable at this point. What should I do, /r9k/?
>>26021471 just do whatever the fuck you need to do with assignments honestly if they hand you material and you don't like it just google this shit if you are already on a computer, and im assuming you are not a computer illetirate take at least 30 minutes a day to rehearse whatever the fuck you need to do, if you don't understand something ask the nerdy guy about it, he always know
>go to college >see grill of my dreams >never speak because robot >2 years later she walks into my life out of the blue >she wants the D >approximate a real relationship for about 2 years with her >friends on either side treat us as a couple, invited to all the same shit together, assumed we will both arrive and leave together >she goes back and forth on whether or not she wants to be boyfriend/girlfriend with me because she's "never been in a relationship before" >seems to settle on "no" >inb4 cuck, she is apparently disgusted by the concept of fucking other dudes than me because of catholic guilt >whatever, her decision, can't force her to like me or whatever >only girl who i have ever felt fully comfortable with, attracted to, similar outlooks on life, comparable intellect >graduate >both of us move to different places (4 hours apart) where we are sad, lonely, and work shit jobs
>receive text yesterday about how much she misses me welp
>halfway through second chance at university >doing mental health nursing course >based around social skills and interactions >thought it would be the baptism of fire I needed >currently fucking it up >drinking every night, pissing away my savings and grant money >Could turn it around but I've fucked up my reputation >nurses are notoriously bitchy and I'm paranoid I've allready picked up a reputation as a freeloading, lazy cunt >feel behind the 20 year olds in my class >I'm 23 >unemployed due to laziness and apathy
>>26021736 Yep, there's none of the obligation or motivation like in mandatory schooling. I have to force myself to make use of my free lessons, and I never do homework at home. I have no idea how I'm still getting straight As.
The only motivation uni gives you is "if you don't do it you're even more fucked when you leave." Well what's the point if you're apathetic about everything in the first place.
>>26018032 Anyone else feels like they're being left behind? It feels like while everyone else is going through life as a complete journey I'm still just as inexperienced as a child, still trying to figure out things that normal people took for granted years upon years ago. What the hell is the point in a life like this?
>tfw my 20th bday today >tfw no gf, not sure what enjoy or want to do anymore. I want to pursue my dreams but i don't want to end up neet so i'm trucking on with a major i fucking hate. >tfw no friends >tfw currently living in a new city thinking that after i graduated high school, I would reinvent myself..
>>26020000 Earlier this year there was a girl who I was sure liked me, she would always say how strong I am and would text me all the time, I was going to ask her out, but she started ignoring me a little more when we were with other people. She would be very affectionate to other people, I just stopped trying immediately. When she texts me, I Respond to anything that needs a response, but I don't bother trying to keep the conversation going.
I miss her a little bit, but I am beyond glad that I stopped hoping that she liked me when it was apparent that I didn't have a chance. Don't let her control your life man, you are better than that.
>>26022180 Thanks man, but i am not really sure of that. As I said she is kind of the only thing that keeps me going. There were times when i got over her and i had nothing to live for. That sounds rather heavy so i guess proper term would be that i really did not have anything to feel passionate about i guess.
>$9 in bank account >$11 in credit card (gas money) >barely started work today >don't get paid until next Friday I'm eating rice with everything.This situation is entirely my fault but I'm feeling 100 times better than I was last month. I'd wake up at 10 and not leave bed until 4.
>>26022591 I am below average with guys, but with women I am completely retarded. part of my problem with talking to women is that I have a crippling fear of them knowing that I like them if they do not like me back. I look like the average chad other than that I wear sweat clothes everyday, so it shouldn't even be that hard, but it still is.
>>26018767 This hits far too close to home. Writing was the only thing I was ever good at, and now when I actually want to write a book, I just can't. I stare at my notebook trying to brainstorm but fucking nothing comes.
>>26022837 I had many normie friends a few years ago, but I kind of stopped hanging out with them for a while, we started hanging out again recently, but I realized that after years of inwardly thinking, I can not relate to them at all. even back a few years ago I was terrible with girls, all my normie friends would act like it is the simplest thing ever and make fun of me for it.
I feel like a side character in my own life. Nothing I want to do ever goes as planned and really no one takes me seriously as a man. I'm always there to cheer on everyone else and pat the ones close to me on the back for their successes.
>tfw no friends >tfw have real autism >tfw no social life and missed out on teenage life >tfw all movies remind of is how you have none of these >tfw you are a robot Nothing can eliminate these feels. Not even my medication.
I've gone from taking no medication pretty much my whole life to a pill a day and some liquid shit in my hair twice every day, just to save what I already had. Having shit genes is bad enough but boy when you have shit and then start aging..
>get a massive crush on this girl that I have known for my whole life during school
Before going on, I have to say that in high school she and the rest of my classmates didn't really like me because I would derail the class to have discussions with the teacher (I regret it now, it's cringe worthy)
>first semester ends, I go back home during winter break still having a massive crush on this girl >over break, I fantasize/masturbate to her >begin to create an almost separate reality where she and I are together >world gets really complex, almost like a novel >start to love this perfect world and the perfect her that do not exist >get back from break and head over to the dining hall >see her walking in so I run back to open the door for her and greet her >she looks at me like a fucking weirdo and says "uhhhm, thanks, anon?" >can't stop looking at her and feeling the utter indifference she has for me >my dream world begins to fall apart, I start to choke up in front of a lot of people >run out of the dining hall with my tray >as I go, my tray flips >a mix of yogurt, milk, and peas land on my pants/shoes >I slip >stand up >make eye contact with her before running out of the door basically crying
>Oneitis from work >Comes over to chill with me and my brothers gf we also work with >Good friend from 2nd grade comes over >"Dude get it in with her" >"I'm trying haha, not sure if she'll go for it though since we work together" >"Hook me up then" >"You're beat bro" >She tells me he added her on facebook the next morning >He keeps trying to get me to go to the bar with him >Wants me to bring her >Declined going to the bar with me at every point before this
>>26023852 He made sure to check up on me when I was stuck with no car or job at my schizophrenic moms house, would get me drunk/baked, take me to get food and pay for it since I had no money, and for the most part has been a bro ever since I've known him. He's not afraid to call me out on my shit and it's helped me change a bit.
Then he pulls this shit after he recently got out of relationships with 2 crazy girls.
>lead a girl on only to realize I don't really like her, I was just being a horn dog >stop texting her >she calls and texts me freaking out >haven't texted for a few days >she just called me a few minutes ago >ignore the call because I'm getting anxious
I don't know what to do, I just want to be alone. I don't even want a gf anymore I'll just die a virgin.
>tfw imagining that there must be have been, statistically speaking, relatively plenty of young qt roman teenage girls who used their personal slaves as personal sex slaves and made them do super degrading shit >tfw you will never be able to see this >tfw you will never see probably the one sitaution in human history where relatively rare sadism and unbridled dominance in women met with circumstances conducive to its private expression >tfw you're stuck jerking off to femdom porn where the women constantly look like they're thinking :SS????? CAN I GO HOME NOW?????? UMMMM.. THIS IS WEIRD :/... I DON'T LIKE THIS...
>Be me this evening >Mom in laundry room again doing senseless shit >"I'm trying to fix this thing here blabla" >Says she's going to bed afterwards >3 or 4 hours later, i go downstairs to get some food cuz i'm starving >SHE'S STILL SITTING THERE AT THE COMPUTER HALF ASLEEP AND DRUNK YET AGAIN >Despite having said she's going to bed "soon" earlier >Yet more forced smalltalk with the barely responsive dumb cunt >Throw food inna microwave >When i come down again to get it i ask her if it's a seasons finale or why the heck she's watching that series in front of the PC (she has a TV in the bedroom too) in the middle of the fucking night >Grab food, say goodnight for 2nd time >As i leave the kitchen she babbles on about how she's already halfway done watching and has to watch it now because tomorrow she's at work again or something
>>26018032 For some reason my stepdad who is a complete asshole to me no matter how nice I try to be feels to the need to keep asking about me to my mom behind my back all the time. He always makes sure I over hear him shit talking about me too. I even bought out of the NEET meme and started doing online classes. I'm taking like 4 classes and have a full project schedule so I'm always in my room. What more do people want from me?
>tfw sign up for interpals >literally only plan on using this to practice talking to girls/trying to get nudes because most girls on there are normies >find this Russian girl >we have the same taste in music and same interests >start talking and sharing music >her english isn't very good but it's really cute >tfw we'll never be together
>>26024664 In short. I'm fairly sure, my younger brother has undiagnosed aspergers. He's bordering 8 and hadn't a taste of real discipline ever in his life. He's currently using these snow days to binge on an english dub of naruto. and video games he's too young to play.
in her ignorance and neglect to the creature she's breeding in her abscence he's nearly at half of his hours logged on this xbox he's watching it on than the entirety of my PC gaming adolescence and teen years. Before ten. Raised with by a televison and a silver spoon, she's bred an overzealous, aggressive facetious insubordinate child with an unfearing demeanor barriered by this autism I think he may have.
His entire reality is warped, and even if my own perception were unreliable my father sees it as well and wants nothing to do with him or her occasionally. My older brother too.
There are times when her newly found urge to put the fear of authority in him turn into a shouting match between two people with the same mental capacity. often compelling her to speak phrases like "this is the child you go to jail for"
I'm a neet college drop out. I'm not sure if my actions are more to condemn her or save him. But one day, his misperceived "abuse" from her, will be my time to "save" him when she goes to far.
I might just bury something very sharp in her while they are wailing away at eachother and he's pleading for his life from her. I'm sure he'd make for a very good witness, thinking I did it for him and not myself.
Maybe this is the shit Iago was going through, even though he died in the end, I'm not sure if I'll get my death the way I want it.
Tomorrow I'm going to a funeral for a guy I knew who killed himself. If you can objectively look at your life and say no one would care. Do it. If even ONE person MIGHT care. Don't. You wouldn't believe what it does to those people. Get help.
>first day back at Uni after leaving in fall because of overwhelming anxiety/depression >have to walk through student center to get to class >feels like ton of bricks are placed on my chest as I become engulfed in the throng of students >all the feelings and thoughts of why I hate this place come flooding back >tfw instantly become extremely self concious and judgmental of myself >tfw I only had one class today and felt like shit/crying afterward
>tfw gf >doing lewd things >have boxers on >still end up cumming on her leg while making out >didnt know it was on her thigh >notice it, freak out >drive her home, scared she's preggos now (she was completely naked) >get her to take Plan B in the morning Happened last night :s almost got a gril pregnant while still being a virgin. Why live?
Granddad passed away due to complications from dementia. It sounds awful but I'm glad he passed sooner rather than him waste away and grow to resent him. If I was diagnosed with it I'd just kill myself to save my memory
Should've just played it off, saying something like "oh i was just fucking around hahah this shit is hilarious"
One time my younger brother walked into a room I was in while I was jerking it and he was there for a good 3 seconds before I noticed and all I said was "It's not what it looks like" and to this day there is nothing awkward between us
>21 >no family >only person who truly cares about me is chad friend >wants to make me a chad >short, small head/long neck combo, skinny >dumb as shit >have the ability to be sexually attracted to people >losing the ability to be interested in other people romantically also >poor
I've given up. As soon as I can find a decent hookup, I'm going to blow all my money on heroin. When all my veins collapse, I'll off myself.
>>26020806 I'm sorry friend. I read somewhere that people tend to push away others who love them because they don't feel that they deserve any love... they feel like if anyone gets too close to them they'll find out the truth that they're totally unlovable... that's really tragic. I hope you can learn to love yourself and accept the love of others too. you should try talking to her again maybe?
>>26018032 At this point, I feel like I'm living life on repeat. I wake up every single day just to find myself wasting another day. I fully realize that I'm going nowhere in life and that I'm no longer content with the way I am living. All I want is for this cycle to end.
>got dumped because I have trust issues >still stay friends because we care about each other and have fun >talk about probably getting back together once I'm better >can't stop thinking about them >can't stop missing them >everything is weird now >he's already moving on >he's told me he's thought about dating other people
I feel so heartbroken. This is the first relationship I've ever had. We were together for nearly a year, and he's already moving on.
>tfw we talked about getting married and having kids
>>26027428 Fucking same. >Talked to girl for the better half of a year >Click super well >Go to visit her >She gas a fiance >I've never been so crushed before >We talked about weddings >Kids >All of it
>ecology major >want to go to grad school >1.8 GPA >suspended twice >can't even pass calc 1 >joined a frat, hate everyone now >mom killed herself >thinking about doing the same im way the fuck over my head and everyday i feel like there is no point to living
>>26027863 I know this feel so so so well. What's helped me is taking a curcumin supplement every day. Doesn't stop cysts from appearing, but greatly speeds up the healing process from a few weeks/multiple months to usually under a week.
>handholdless virgin >family always pissed at me >shit McDonald's job >online girlfriend pissed off because you spied on her with a fake Facebook account >almost left me >convinced her to stay >obviously doesn't love me anymore yet claims she does
Literally graduated high school last year, done fuck all since then. I never thought id make it this far in life and have no idea what the fuck im supposed to be doing so i just go to my shit job flippin burgers for 9 fucking hours a day and get high and drunk to try and prevent the thoughts of how much of a fuck up i am. Knowing deep down ill never acomplish anything, never be remeberd by anyone, and probably wind up hanging from the rafters one of these days
>kissless hugless handholdless virgin >barely any friends, always alone at college >get into stupid argument the other day with one of said friends about some idiotic thing I came up with >get mad at each other >tells me that he hates me, and says he never wants to see me again >haven't heard from him I really hate myself
>>26018032 >27 >unemployed more than 3 yrs >back in community college >feeling completely empty after 2 day cocaine and alcohol binge >don't know how much longer I will have to suffer this depressing life
>25 >diagnosed with BPD >I have been told that I am weird, do unusual things >over time I watch and mimic "normal" people >No success with women, and relation ship advice always say to avoid people like me
>tfw have a crush on a prof who's 6 years older than me >she has a husband >on last class for some reason we joked with classmates about how only illicit lovers take care of women since husband has a qt secured and doesn't have to try anymore >prof is like "so true" and then also says it isn't even funny Also, >we talk about TV series kinda stuff before or after class sometimes >she recs me Sense8 >it's fucking lewd as fuck How do I into NTR?
>meet guy through mutual friends >mutual friends are Tall dude and Fat faggot >is pretty cool whenever I talked to him, like the guy >one night tall dude invites me to his house, guy is there >talk about life >guy has it kind of hard, basically lives with a friend because his mentally ill mom is in Nevada >spent a year there and hated it >he's just recently back from that year >through the months we hit it off, become really good friends, three of us are a friend group >I break up with gf, for some reason super emotional, crying and shit >can't think of anyone else to call but guy >consoles me and shit >meet up with other two later >feel happy with group
>Fat faggot was always a bit of a nuisance >always trying to be the sassy gay type dude >would just use gross shock humor in his cocksucker voice to get laughs from people >don't really mind at the time, enjoying the dynamic as a whole too much to care
>me and guy hang out the entire day >drop him off at place he's living at >leave >was gonna meet up with chick >he calls me while I'm en route >locked out >swing back around and get him >bring him along >girl may have wanted to fug, she does some really weird shit, it freaks us out >he sleeps at my place >we spend whole weekend together >mentions at one point how this must be what it feels like to have a brother >love you bro >start a persona save file that weekend, switching off between fights and shit
>time passes >visits less frequent >Fat faggot really doesn't like me for some reason now >hear from Tall dude he's been talking shit >calls me narcissistic and self absorbed >the irony, coming from a fat flitty fuck who masquerades as a ridiculously exaggerated stereotype for affection >eventually get just radio silence from guy >see his snaps with other people constantly, breaks my heart >guy is still best buds with fat faggot >Tall dude still hangs with me, they cut him off by association >year passes, they ignore us, radio silence I miss him, but I'm also angry
>>26021471 Been at Uni for 2 years. I drink alot. People are starting to tell me its a problem. But they have no idea what its like to be lonely. So I drink and fall asleep between classes and I still get decent marks so i guess im not changing anytime soon
>>26027101 I lost that feeling together even sexually attracted to people. I just acted in ways that made me happy and weirdly people came to me. Anyways I met someone who made me really happy, But she decided to crush me and tell me I was just company for her and not a person. So im back where i started. Incapable of being happy, but nobody will let me do the one thing that will stop me from being unhappy
> Be me, average Failed French normiefag > Had my first gf at 22 few weeks ago, even if she is 18, at least she listens to Metal > About to complete my Master degree in few months > Already found my internship > I'm becoming a normalshit > Can't go on Wizchan anymore
>tfw I became content through being constantly sad I feel like shit, but I can channel it into productive stuff, also I started to give no fucks about women because low sex drive and I already got two girls who show interest in me Too bad I can't get myself to date any of them because I hate myself. The sexual tension feels nice tho.
>have a crush on best friend for 4 years >ask her out once or twice since i've known her, she didnt feel ready for another relationship >she finally confesses that she loves me >mfw i moved overseas >mfw it's too late to see her again >mfw she might just cuck me anyway and there's no point in living
>Have crush on a girl >Be nice to her and try to ask her out >Says she's not interested in a relationship right now, but I'll be the first one she'll think of when she will be (you can see where this is going) >Ends up getting together with a chad a couple of weeks later >Chad plays in a local band for a living and is barely able to support himself on being in that band >Decide that this is a lost cause and start looking for another girl >Go out on a date with one pretty ok-ish girl (maybe a 7/10 looks wise, but a nice personality) >Calls me up in the middle of the date frantic, asking me if I'm no longer interested in her >Remind her that she's in a relationship already so what I do should be irrelevant >Hangs up on me >Later messages my date telling her to back off because I'm apparently the property of my crush >Date tells me that she's just had to go trough dealing with a creepy ex-friend harassing her on social media, so she doesn't want to be with me if it means she'll have to go trough with it again Normally when you get cuck'd it's a dude, not some sociopath trying to keep you as their backup beta provider. Should I contact her and tell her to go fuck herself or do something more sinister and stick around till the chad inevitably knocks her up before leaving her and her then needing a beta provider for herself and the kid/kids?
>poopoo in pants when wake up >mommy babi need changu >no answer >REEEEEEEEEEEEE >mommy comes ten minutes later >she was taking sleep candy >throw poopoo >takes away all my GBP >she says she's tired of me doing nothing all day and that I need to live in the real world Why should I live now?
Tell her your new date has logs of the harassment and you have multiple friends ready to back you up as witnesses to the police, and that you won't think twice about protecting yourself and going to the police if she interferes with your life again.
Also tell chad yeah >>26034763 that she's been creeping around being possessive around any girl you show any interest in. Which you probably will do FUCKING SATAN I'M ON TO YOU
>>26034784 The problem is that there's really no big guns to bring out. She just politely told my date to back off and because of past experiences with a crazy she did back off before my crush posted anything crazy.
Fuck... The date was a really nice girl and now that my crush has shown her true colors I don't even want her anymore.
>broke up with gf >quit my job >car got damage by drunk asshole >all in the span of a week >feel like life shit on me >overwhelming despair >taking care of things, one at a time >besides girl problems, of course >looking for work >car's being taken care of >been taking care of myself >though can't stop staying up past 7am >8/10 random girl approached me >comes to hang >end up cuddling and making out >????
i'm feeling pretty damn blindsided desu senpai >inb4 normie. i've been a robot for 90% of my life
>>26034392 No, nothing interests me the way weeb stuff did when I was 14 years old. It was my age that really helped things feel great.
>>26034534 But I really loved those dumb things back then. Now I don't like anything that much, that's what I miss, being so enthusiastic and filled with wonder and awe. The actual things in particular I don't even care for anymore other than the fact that they take me back in time.
>first gf in freshman year >she leaves me to start dating the popular guy >turns out popular guy is a jerk >she comes crawling back in tears begging me to take her back >refuse and ignore her >second gf, best friend who was consoling me after 1st gf >turns out she was into me >we start dating >towards the end of the school year she has to move >get Facebook so we can keep in touch and try long distance dating >find out one day she was cheating on me with a nignog >2 years later, junior year >gay British exchange student in one of my classes, find out from a mutual friend he's into me >decide why not, date him >find out from Facebook he has another bf back home >according to him, dating me was just a prank >don't even care at this point, just feeling kinda broken >about 3 years later, decide to try dating again >meet some guy online >lives in my area >Skype a few times, really hit it off >we decide to meet up for a date >super excited, never been on an actual full fledged date before >my dumbass lets this slip >the day of the date, get to where we're supposed to meet >he's no where to be seen >decide to text him, he might be running late after all >he texts back, says that he doesn't want really want to date anyone "inexperienced in dating" >don't text back, just buy a couple Carl's Jr burgers and go home >a year later >I've all but given up on dating >yesterday >browsing /v/ >kojima thread, people get into talking about facial hair >one anon posts a picture of himself >handsome as fuck >we start talking, hit it off >give him my ps4 username and 3ds friendcode >says he has class, but will add me asap >a day later, still hasn't added me
>>26018032 >the universe is a big place, earth is one rock in one corner of a corner >humans live for 100 years if lucky, earth and universe billions of years old >time will erase all memory of you and more likely than not humanity >humans think they are a gift to the universe that transcend all other energy and matter I mean it is what it is, just makes me sad. People think 50 years is long term thinking, but it's just like, srs please. I'm just unhappy I can't save humans from themselves.
Literally no motivation to do anything Only like doing what I want to do see no point in living since all that's gonna happen is get a job and die I want to enjoy life doing what i want but see no way how help
>find out my dad, brother, and sister have spinal issues and degenerative discs >mother got arthritis in her 30s, joint issues on her side going back >when I've said for nearly 20 years of my life that exercising hurts and makes me want to die, nobody thought it could be related
>>26034803 That's still harassment. Get it on record, so if she does it again to you or anyone else it will be there. Men doing nothing is the reason women are the way they are.
>>26040042 >Mom cheated on dad with alcoholic with missing teeth who carves mushrooms from tree stumps on the side of the highway >Last time he came to our house (dad didn't know she was cheating at the time) my dad said nothing, just left the house and went on a drive until he'd gone >Almost certain she's still cheating now >Dad just makes passive-aggressive remarks about it at the dinner table >She walks around uncovered when she gets out of the shower >She leaves period blood on the toilet seat >She's going to Ibiza or some shit with my slut sister in the Summer Why couldn't I have an attractive, dignified mom? There should be benefits for people who live with cuck dads and slut moms.
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