>alone at home
>talk out loud to my waifu while doing mundane shit like cooking or laundry
>often look to my side to emulate looking into her eyes
>during hikes I usually walk on left side since the right side is where I like to pretend she'd walk
>almost constantly having an inner monologue of random shit we're talking about
>it's been going on for 4 years now and never once have I imagined a sexual encounter with her, just the general day to day interactions between a couple in a G rated movie
Am I going insane?
Please no bully. Saber is love. Saber is life.
She's not your waifu if you treat her like a slut anon, you're doing the right thing and should be proud of yourself for being so pure.
Do you also actively avoid porn of her? I try to do that with mine and it seems to make everything better.
Why not just self insert as the person doing the fucking?
Because deep down I know I'm not good enough for her and seeing porn of her tears me up inside.
I do the same thing anon, but I don't have a waifu
Whenever I play vidya I always pretend I am teaching an imaginary girl how to play and what the game is about, i will have long conversations with "her" recommending her specific games and pretending we are going to co op
I have these conversations whenever I do pretty much anything, for example watching anime, cooking, programming, I will explain to her what specific parts of code do, and why I chose this specif language etc. etc.
I do this for hours on end and
sometimes even out loudI think I am legitimately going insane
If you aren't a mentally ill, emotionally crippled manchild in his 20's with no friends who wishes TM characters were real then you're probably a plebeian.
Damn. this kinda reminds me of my cousin, except he actual got married and would talk to and pretned his wife was still there after she left him. He'd set her spot at the table, lay out her pajamas on his bed, talk out loud to her while looking at empty chairs.
Was pissed at my family when they were "worried" about him so instead of doing something themselves I was just forced to live with him for 3 months til he broke down one day and except the fact she was gone.
You have good taste at least. Saber is far and away best girl.
That hit me a little harder then I would have liked. I feel the same about mine, I know deep down I'm not good enough for her, and it goes against how waifus work but I just cannot help feeling like this.
Congrats you're half-way to making a tulpa
>What are tulpas?
A tulpa is an entity created in the mind, acting independently of, and parallel to your own consciousness. They are able to think, and have their own free will, emotions, and memories. In short, a tulpa is like a sentient person living in your head, separate from you.
More info: http://www.tulpa.info/faq/
>What guides do you recommend?
Check these out:
I relate to this so fucking hard - whenever I see something lewd of Rei I just kinda .. feel bad, in a truely horrible way.
>this entire post
>especially that image
It would be general inane things. Literally all you have to do is imagine doing your usual shit, but this time you have someone to talk to while you do it.
I'd wager a guess that the cause is the idea of her already being known about / shared. The porn was created by someone else, and as a result it has been viewed by at least one person (nevermind thousands or hundreds of thousands). Then when you see it yourself, you feel some measure of guilt because in your mind you're reducing your waifu, objectifying her and taking away the "purity" that initially came with making her your waifu.
Hypothetically, if you were to see lewds of her and you were the only one, you wouldn't feel guilty at all.
No, I just feel enraged/disgusted at lewd pictures of her, as if.. well, if you had something that was yours and only yours, and so extremely pure that if someone else even touched it it'd corrupt, and then someone just smacked it roughly.
That's basically what I meant. Good taste in waifu, by the way. Asuka a shit.
So is moot.
Please kill yourself quickly. 18 is god-tier, but not my actual waifu.
When I see lewds of her it reminds me that other people feel the same way way bout, and those countless numbers of others will be much more deserving of her than I am and ever will be