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How do I fart more often?
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001

Thread replies: 32
Thread images: 9
How do I fart more often?

Serious question. I love how I feel after a long fart, but I rarely ever do. Any tips on what I can eat to increase my "output"?
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>>25991684
pls be grill
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drink a shitload of beer, it sure gets my shit brewing the next day
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>>25991684
eat alot of protein, protein shakes do it for me
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>>25991820
lt ain't.
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>>25991684
Well, the picture is a hint.
Mug and winteresque weather assist the deduction of it's contents.

Hot cocoa.
If done right, it may be tweaked with heavy cream or milk.
If my statistics are right, more and more of the population, U.S.A. Is becoming lactose intolerant.

Try that, you'll get your gas.
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>>25991684
Eat lots of sunchokes.
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Eat an entire box of fiber one snacks
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>>25992985
This.
Your ass will explode in a matter of hours.
Seriously, even 3 is enough to keep you going. Taste good too.
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>>25991684
YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT M8
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That looks suspiciously like humanised mlp.
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>>25993753
How would you know that?
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>>25994570
Everyone's seen what the show looks like. Looks like the yellow one with the pink hair.
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>>25994597
l don't see it.
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Two words; onion soup.

Inside an hour your belly and intestines will be bloated with gas, and the slightest movement or pressure on your abdominal area will cause a violent release of something Hitler could've used to kill jews with.
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>>25991684
Black beans and onions, bro. Pork helps too. Eat like a Mexican, fart like a Mexican.
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>>25991684
Eat more onions
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Delicious /Heinz beans/ of course.
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Eat alot of potatoships, like a whole sack or how english people call it a day!
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Alright anons, opposite question - how do I fart less? I seem to fart about 4-5 times an hour on average.
From what I've read, people on average fart 12 times a day, so mine seems a bit high. I also don't like to be constantly holding in farts at work, because in my all-female team, I'm obviously going to be blamed if I let them go.
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lentils, sausage, sauerkraut, and beer
germany must be a gassy place
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>>25997187
>because in my all-female team
Assert your male dominance, you carry pheromones in your colon, share them.
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>>25997756
The manager is a man. One at the top, one at the bottom, and women in the middle, just like the rest of the world.
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Carbs. If you eat certain carbs you just fart massive amounts. I eat a lot of pasta (because it's cheap and tasty). Just pasta and some cheese and broccoli + whatever else, like salt or garlic/onion powder or whatever
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>>25998611
So be the man you're made to be.
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>>25996880
I just ate an entire tin of them with chilli powder in them and my arse is stinkin' right now.
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learn how to do anal breaths
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There's nothing certain in the world of flatulence, but most farts are caused by lactose intolerance. Second biggest thing is complex carbohydrates, as the earlier posters said with beans, onions, and fiber. Add to that list any cruciform vegetable, like cabbage, broccoli and cauliflower. Onions have double the power though... complex carbs and a lot of sulfur for to make a hydrogen sulfide "reek"... which I suspect may be half of your sick but hilarious fetish.

If you don't want to fart but like the stuff above, use the product "beano". It's just enzymes which break down the complex carbs.
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Dried apricots. I ate a whole package and was farting nonstop for 2 days.
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>tfw fart too much and it prevents me from searching for a gf because it's gross.
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For me it was raisin bran and/or toast for breakfast which did it. However, figuring out what makes your particular gut flora produce gas can be a real crapshoot.

I'm not proud of myself for that one.
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>>25998974
>lactose intolerance
I'm starting to think I have this. How would I know it's this and not something else?

>>25999202
>a real crapshoot
Thread replies: 32
Thread images: 9
Thread DB ID: 466010



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