>>25988375 >mfw tried being sober and heard this low whispering every damned day 24/7. >mfw laying in bed and wake up elsewhere and wake up where I slept. >can be constant thru the night, constant dreaming.
I can usually write poetry, but I can always tell when I'm beginning to slip because suddenly my words will become jumbled and my understanding of certain definitions will 'evolve' into something more free and intangible, like I'll pick words based on sound quality rather than actual meaning. It makes for a jumbled mess but provides an early warning that my meds probably need adjusting.
Growing up I was terrified of developing schizophrenia. I'm a hypochondriac and my uncle has schizophrenia so I thought throughout childhood it was only a matter of time and after every mental misstep I made I instantly diagnosed myself as schizophrenic.
But after actually talking with my uncle it's pretty clear I don't have schizophrenia. At 16 he brought my dad and their siblings to the front lawn and said "watch this- I can make the car start with my mind." That was how they first recognized something was off
>>25988318 Okay, so I've always had issues with depression and used to suffer from serious night terrors when I was 14. However, I recently flipped out and was arrested for having a knife while drunk recently. While I was in the cell I kept hearing friends whispering and calling my name from outside the door, and have been seeing friends and family members how weren't there.
Does this sound like schizophrenia or something else? I'm going to the Dr. on monday and plan to tell them about my depression and violent tendencies, but I don't want to mention the hallucinations unless I speak to a therapist I learn to trust. I feel so strange right now. My head feels so light (usually feels heavy when depressed) and I feel like there's no barrier between me and the air. I feel like screaming but I won't.
>>25989070 Fuck off normalfag, the only self diagnosed on here are the psychopaths and narcissists because they think it sounds cool and edgy to be mentally retarded. I know this is hard for you to comprehend, but the majority of this board's users at one time had AT LEAST a diagnose of autism or depression, and diagnosis of schizophrenia or psychosis were not uncommon. People on here used to talk about that stuff all the time before it filled up with you unempathetic assholes.
>>25989039 What's funny about that is I used to take acid after I received the diagnosis. Weird thing about acid is that I always felt strangely normal on it, like I could separate the disease from reality easier and process it easier. Hallucinogenics actually make things easier for me.
Imagine it's like seeing the world through two separate sets of eyes, where I could more easily identify true reality and separate it from the other set which identifies my illness. It was a strange reaction, but I've been told by another schizophrenic they felt the same way. I've never gotten lost in my delusions while on acid and I felt strangely comforted.
Still, welcome to the world of psychosis, even a temporary stay will give you at least a small taste of what it's like.
>>25989073 Just remember, once you have been diagnosed as mentally ill, your human card with all its rights and perks is immediately revoked. On the plus side you can always apply for the disability payments.
>>25988318 >madly in love with schizo boy >can hear him talking to himself sometimes >can't help but wonder what's going on in his head >he's enigma >tfw just want to hug him and help him >but never will
>>25989131 Are there conditions that cause psychosis that aren't as bad as schizophrenia? I just feel really freaked out, and I sort of want to know a bit more about what could be going on before tomorrow. I have to go into college tomorrow even after seeing the doctor. >>25989155 I've only just left the NEET life behind so I'd rather not. I live in Britain so what can I even lose out on beyond the right to own a double barrel shotgun after bolting a safe to the wall and paying a licence fee, only to as a result forfeit my right to be searched only with a warrant? Is there really that much to lose? What has happened to you since being diagnosed?
That's also why, like I said, I'm not going to mention hallucinations straight away. Just my homicidal ideation (but I don't plan on doing it to anyone and am of course confident I won't act on my fantasies) and that I'm very stressed and feel "strange". >>25989173 Please fuck off
>>25989498 th-that doesn't sound like it would help at all
I'm not deluded, as far as I can tell I'm perfectly capable of distinguishing reality from unreality. But I have been seeing and hearing things, for the first time in several years. I'm quite worried now. What exactly made her send you there? I think, for me, if I had to go to hospital, I would kill myself as soon as I was let out. That or run away and try and find work in some other country. I couldn't handle the shame, and being held somewhere against my will would likely make me very stressed.
>>25989526 I went to a hospital and a police station when I went off my meds. They forced me to have a psych exam and then I was under the mental health act. 2 months in a ward. >>25989534 Go to a private psychiatrist if you can. If not and it's urgent then go to the hospital. But at a hospital they can put you in a ward/unit for psychiatric conditions. They will ask you if you have thoughts of suicide or hurting others, be prepared to answer that question.
>>25989627 I think about hurting others but it's more of a fantasy than anything else, I have no intentions of doing it and don't feel compelled by some otherly force. It's like almost a naughty thought, like something you'd like to do but know you won't, like squeezing a pretty girl's ass or something. Make sense?
>>25989762 Well I'll say no if I get the chance again but I already told a Dr. when I was arrested that I wanted to stab people in the throat and drink their blood. But he let me go, so maybe it's different in the UK? I think here perhaps they put more value on intent than desire.
My mom is Scizophrenia and my dad has autism, both disorders mutated and made me a superhuman essentially speaking. I also have a 140 IQ. I threw away any limits regular science had placed on the human mind since im by everyone's terms, "a retard", And did some self discoveries on my own. I developed telepathy, premonitions, healing abilities, future forsight, night vision. I can pick up on sounds more accutely then others, my eyesight can see further in range the most, I never get sick, and also have a low sensitivity to pain. I had a few heart attacks in the past in attempts to commit suicide, and I ended up sleeping them off each time without ever going to the hospital. But at a cost of my mutation the only downside is that bright colors seem pale to me and dark colors seem brighter.
Do you guys who have relapses actually take your meds regularly? Also, did you take a long time between full blown psychosis and getting treatment?
I'm asking because I started taking meds immediately after having obvious paranoia, hallucinations and delusions (I did have these symptoms for years beforehand, but on a far less perceptible way) and haven't had any symptoms at all since then.
But alas young fool! But have you ever met a being thats been through all 12 dimensions? Your 4th dimensional katana is a butterknife compared to my 8th dimensional gunblade that was forged by the tears of a seraphim
Okay I'll bite, the only person with autism is you. You couldn't pick up on the condescending manner of my insult since your a fucking dweeb tripfaggot that is socially and mentally incapable of finding a community in real life since you lack the balls as a man to actually go out and make some real friends. So you create a tripfag on a Vietnamese image board and talk to other socially inept loser tripfaggot on skype since you all found a commune in swallowing each others self deprication. And you are a fagtron because your a loser that spends most of his time in front of screen like a soulless human being talking to other soulless cretins to afraid to get a life in the real world. So yeah, you are a fucking fagtron and the world would be a much happier place if you just killed yourself already
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