>Be well established young man, house, car, retirement fund with 20k already
>Work a lot
>Little bit of savings little bit of debt
>Live alone since I bought house, nearly 4 years
>Lately mind races constantly unless I'm working, no reason just constant feeling of stress and unease
>Only a six pack seems to settle my mind
>Can't live like this
>Strongly considering drinking antifreeze, I hear it's sweet and it works quickly
It helped me out.
I work in maintenence, but between overtime and side work I pull in ~$60k/yr
At first I was.
I've toyed with this idea. The thought of having something depending on me for survival bugs me out. But maybe you guys are right. Maybe I need a friend.
if you end up getting the dog spend time training with the thing, a lot of people make the mistake of not training, teach it tricks, build it's trust, have fun.
this'll also give you something of a hobby.
I'm in a similar position to you OP.
>Work full-time in a pretty cushy job, work from home for part of the week
>About $245K in savings selling my house to stupid people for far more than it was worth, haven't bothered to buy another house
>On paper live a really relaxed and stress-free life with a good financial future in front of me
>Can't relate to anyone and don't have any friends
>Never had a gf and will almost certainly die having never been romantically loved by another human being.
>Live an empty life without goals or purpose, literally nothing interests me
>Drink so much to contain the bitterness I've become a functional alcoholic
>Despite having no use for the money, I'll never give it to charity because despite knowing it's petty, I just can't get over how much I hate the world and feel shat on by society at large, so refuse to contribute anymore than I have to.
Unless you can find some way to be a normie, there's no escape. Good luck OP.
>Tell me more about your life,
Not much to tell, I get up, go to work, go home, read 4chan/watch anime while drinking, go to bed, rinse and repeat.
>what is your job?
Basically just an office job, doing spreadsheets, that kind of thing.
>How old are you?
>Did you never have a gf?
Never had a gf, women aren't interested in me at all unless they're really fat and blind drunk, or super desparate. Partly because I'm incapable of making smalltalk with people and seeming charming, and partly because I'm relatively unattractive.
I'm not willing to compromise myself by settling for some desperate woman who's out of options. I know I'd feel trapped and even more miserable stuck with someone I didn't care about, and she'd probably cheat on me and fuck me over the first chance she could.
>Do you have any friends?
I have people around me (From work) who if asked might say they're my friend but in my mind they're just acquaintances. I don't interact with them outside of work and I have little to nothing in common with them.
You sound like an older version of me. I'm 23 now.
Just today my mother told me I should just make more money and then all my problems will go away (I've been bitching a little). I'm already aware that not much would change if I had money, most poor people get girls and feel socially accepted.
Parents seem to be stuck in that mentality of more wealth solving everything. They don't seem to understand that that acquiring wealth is pointless if you're not able to participate meaningfully in society. If you're never going to get married, have a family, etc, and aren't able to build a life for yourself, wealth has no value beyond helping you get life's necessities.
>lost the only woman I ever truly loved
>lost even the ones I didn't really love
>just keep fucking it all up
>drinking too much
>can't even sleep properly anymore
>cigarettes are starting to fuck me all up
>finally writing well enough for it to matter
>still can't write a letter to the girl that got away
>just want to die
>tfw completely lost control
Get away from the media that says you need so and so things like a girlfriend to be happy. Way harder than it sounds I know, but at least try and shorten exposure to it.
Don't how much free time or energy you have, but I would also suggest start exercising, whether cardio, lifting, or both. I do it and it can be a great stress relief. On that I guess just try and find a hobby you enjoy. Something to distract yourself with.
OP humans are social creatures. You can find proof of this as even the most fucked up social rejects end up coming together here as some kind of de facto community. Having others in your life is one of the keys to not being fucked up.
This anon has a point, kind of. The only thing with a distraction is that it often leads to escapism. Which isn't much better.
I'm 23, KHHV and in college(STEM) atm, if things go as they are now, I'll likely end up in the same situation, making ok money and possibly living in a small apartment by myself.
You know it would be nice if our kind got together and formed some old fashioned male only brotherhood instead of being alone like this.
I guess. Although, I'd venture to say that escapism would feed into your wanting to die, rather than alleviating it. If you find a hobby that is fulfilling, go nuts. That's what you'd want to find.
I studied Physics in college, same situation as you probably. Thing is, I really don't like being around other people. I actively avoid human interaction at all cost. Not that it makes me anxious, it doesn't, but still I hate having to see others and be seen.
I'm living at home right now and I would really love to move out, but due to my budget my only option would be to share an apartment with a stranger. And this is automatically ruled out for me, so I'm stuck.
You know I'm not really much of a social person myself either, I get tired very quickly after being around other people for too long, but I live in an apartment with two other students and it's not that bad, considering everyone of us has his own room and we share only the kitchen and the bathroom.
We almost never see each other and when we do it's pretty chill. I can even fap naked in my room and it's no problem.
Unless you end up with ultranormies who would zone you out for not wanting to spend time with them or bother you in some other way, you might be alright.
Doesn't it bother you walking by them every time you want to go to the bathroom? Or knowing that someone might just open your door when you are drunk shitposting on 4chan and listening to music on a weekend?
Eh not really, we've set our boundaries, we knock on each other's closed door when we need to talk and if I want I can just lock myself in so they know I'm not available.
I mean surely it's not like living alone or with your parents but I spend very little(200euros/month rent in Europe, we split other house expenses). It's a good compromise.