Is "it only gets worse" a meme, guys ? I'm 26 and my life is shit (and I mean khv jobless skinnyfat type of shit)
Does it really gets worse ? Everytime I come here I see the older robots complaining about how life is shit after 30 (girls hit the wall and become unattractive fatties, guys go bald, people only care about money and shit)
By those metrics, yes, life in your 30s is pretty shit.
>why do you expect your life to become better in your 30s
Some people irl actually told me it gets better, and their life was shit during their 20s as well. /r9k/ is pretty much the only place where I see the opposite saying so I'd like to know why
>30 here, 31 in a few months
>Tuesday night 11.54pm
>2 drinks away from another full bottle of bourbon since 5.30 pm
>9 - 5 job I abhor
>$9.5k debt (holy shit just realized the poetry)
>Bills seem to keep coming larger or out of the blue: got a $300 speeding ticket today
>Can't get ahead
>Drink more and more to forget
>Tunnel getting longer and can no longer see light at the end
My life is an absolute piece of shit write off but I can say from experience that if I was your age it would get worse if I did nothing or continued to do the same. If you're not happy CHANGE! DO SOMETHING!
For fuck's sake, every day you put off it gets harder and harder to make significant change.
Change is never actually insurmountable. People like to say it's too late but it's because the challenge has become harder. Don't leave it too late to change. You can still change in your 30s and 40s but it will be a lot fucking easier if you start planting the seeds of change now.
Don't become me, man. I hate me.
I'm not into the "it's too late for me to change now" thing but shit, I don't feel motivated at all. Never had friends, never made out with a girl or whatever, I've been waiting for this for 20+ years. I'm ugly as fuck, there's nothing I can change about it, and I don't really know if it's possible to deal with anxiety unless I take meds.
There are plenty of things I could change on the other hand (job, sport and stuff like this) but shit I feel like I'm dead inside.
I'm 30 and actually having the best time of my life, I finally have a decent job that I like, I managed to lose a bunch of weight and now look pretty attractive, I was also really awkward in my twenties and that is going away and I have actually gotten some friends and I jut got back from a vacation in Florida that I could actually afford, this is so much better than when I was a poor fat awkward student in my twenties and all I could afford to do was sit in my room all day watching anime and playing vidya.
That's the problem. Change feels so hard. Feels like it would take forever. Feels like too much work. Or feels pointless because we've become so accustomed to depression. You say you've been waiting for 20 years...what have you actually done to make something happen during those 20 years?
The best periods of life are adolescence and post-adolescence.
If you weren't born in a wealthy family and lived a haute bourgeoisie lifestyle, your life is meaningless.
You'll never be a good looking, intelligent and rich 16yo dating a 15yo that really loves you.
I know it's dumb as fuck but it's just that it the most recent example. It's always things like car registration has come around again, fuck $700 (I know that's annual but who remembers until the bill comes in the mail?). Or car breaks down like 2 months ago. Or mother asking for help with her credit card bill. Just shit the always keeps coming with little notice.
>Implying normal people actually have to work hard to get a bf/gf and make friends
I get what you say but come on, let's be honest, you shouldn't have to do anything when it comes to the social thing. Of course getting a job, making money and shit is different. But the main reason why I'm depressed is because I'm friendless and a 26 virgin and I mean it
I'm 32, and life is pretty good. I found the right person for me like 15 years ago, though, and we both make enough money to live in suburban bliss. Good friends, good food, good beer, regular lovin', what more does a person need?
We did travel extensively before we settled down, though. I think you got to go have some adventure before you pop out the kids.
>let's be honest, you shouldn't have to do anything when it comes to the social thing.
I'd say the exact opposite with anything. You can't expect to gain something from doing nothing. That applies to everything.
>Of course getting a job, making money and shit is different. But the main reason why I'm depressed is because I'm friendless and a 26 virgin and I mean it
I'm older and in the same situation. I mean, I have people I still see occasionally but they have their own social circles and I often feel like they see me out of guilt or an obligation produced fro past closeness. I blew it though. It was my actions that ruined my friendships and my current inaction that render me unable to produce new friendships. I'm the problem. That's what's so hard. I know that yet I can't force myself to change.
I'm turing 31 in a few months, KV here. I have a job, masters degree, and plenty of money and material stuff, but still am miserable and will probably kill myself after my parents die. it never gets better, and nothing I do fixes it. women that weren't interested before are now only interested because I offer "stability" (aka a free ride) and I'm not falling into the roastie trap. I'd rather be dead than be used.
I'm 47 and enjoying life, OP. I had my mid-life crisis around 43-45 or so where I had to make peace with the fact that I was sliding down the bottom third of my life, and that most of the things I dreamed about when I was young were never going to happen. But I looked at my life and realized I've done some pretty amazing things and that, as a result, I have a tremendous wealth of knowledge and experience. I'm not as strong or fast or durable as I used to be, but I've become more cunning and, in many ways, more ruthless as the illusions of youth have been stripped away.
As a writer, I'm looking forward to the most productive period of my life. Young people just don't have the life experience to be great writers, no matter how much technical skill they have. Only those who have tasted the sweet and the bitter, who have endured a broad enough range of highs and lows can really write in a convincing way. It's why children can't sing the blues with soul, no matter how good they are technically; they haven't lived long enough to feel the kind of existential hurt which produces good art.
Your life will definitely change, OP. And unless you find things to replace what you're losing, your life really will become smaller. But the good news is if you keep your mind sharp and are constantly inviting new experiences into your life, your understanding of the world will become richer and broader, and you will have the dispassionate, long view of one who no longer has to worry about "the future" -- it's already here for me.
If you are truly a pathetic loser (not like the most of the people on this board), then yes it gets worse. As you get older you develop more or less serious health problems. You realize nobody will ever love you and if you didn't change in your twenties then you won't in your thirties.
30 and up is actually only good for people who suffered through their first 20 years of life and made something out of themselves. Then they have the money and where is money there are women, friends and family.
Now if you are one of the true losers who either NEET or can barely stay afloat with their minimum wagecuckoldry then it is only gets worse. 99% of people went on with their lives. They have a family, children and a stable life. Goals to fulfill. Meanwhile you have no excuse and people think you are weird, a loser, an outsider.
Tfw no gf becomes nothing just a funny meme, when your parents grow old and them dying any day becomes a reality. Especially if you struggle to provide for yourself. Not having a single reason to live is just the icing on the cake.
tl;dr: my life
Not true at all. I'm 47 and don't have a pot to piss in. All my possessions can fit in a single backpack. I keep my life simple, my needs small, and my life interesting. It has nothing to do with money. In fact almost the opposite is true; money and "success" will come between you and your happiness. Your shallow view is a surefire recipe for misery and an existentially hollow life.
I did, for a while. I wrote custom erotica and made a small living from it. At one point I was approached by an agent who wanted to represent me and could have gone professional with my Lovecraftian horror, but after a lot of soul searching I decided that I had a different calling. I've wondered how my life would have been different if I'd followed that path, but never really regretted it.
I think what I've benefitted most from in my life, in terms of writing, is learning sufficient stillness to be able to sense the faint, underlying pattern of dharma, of the Tao interweaving my life with the world, or what the Bible refers to as "the still, small voice of the Holy Spirit."
It doesn't happen often in your life, but occasionally you reach a crossroads where you can *feel* that everything is resting on a pivot, and the slightest movement will send your life in one direction or another forever, closing other doors permanently as you step boldly through your chosen doorway. Learning the quietness of spirit to feel the tug which tells you where your golden path leads comes from a lot of life experience and patience. It's this ability to take a step back and see the big picture which I believe informs art, and which separates technically good art from great art.
After the age of 20, everything goes downhill, sharply.
That's why a good start is so essential. You need to have had early luck and confidence. Then the downhill slide isn't so noticeable.
>be me, in elementary school
>want to be popular, but it's hard when I'm short/unathletic
>have lots of friends but none of the girls like me, convince myself it will get better in middle school
>go to middle school, girls still don't like me, but now have a harder time getting along with other guys as sports and girls become a higher priority, decide I will reinvent myself in high school and it will get better
>in high school, basically a social outcast at this point, I repel girls so other guys don't want to hang out with me either
>begin spending all free time playing video games alone
>decide I will just survive this way, everyone says it gets better in college which will be a non-stop orgy for me
>go to college, be an even bigger outcast than I was in HS
>realize the "nonstop orgy" I heard about is only true for the top Chads who are fucking every girl on campus
>decide I will turn my life around after I graduate when I start making real money
>take a job across the country, where no one knows me and I can get a fresh start
>realize how hard it is to make friends after college
>29 now, no friends, have never had a gf
>every time I thought my life would get better, it got worse
>I'm /fit/, hygienic, own a nice house and a nice car, but none of those things can overcome my autism
>my only regret is not killing myself 15 years ago
Have you never been faced with a decision which should have been very difficult, but you simply knew instantly what you were supposed to do? What came after may have been difficult, but it was effortless because you knew that it was the path you were supposed to be walking.
I don't know, maybe the reason so many of you are so miserable is because you haven't actually experienced this because you've never been still enough and patient enough to have a moment of what the Taoists refer to as "wei wu wei": action no-action. Passivity within your own nature.
Maybe you should be. After all, I'm the one who is reasonably happy with my life despite having no money, no car, no insurance, no investments, no family, no mortgage, no pet, and no material possessions.
>Have you never been faced with a decision which should have been very difficult, but you simply knew instantly what you were supposed to do? What came after may have been difficult, but it was effortless because you knew that it was the path you were supposed to be walking.
No, I incessantly debate the most mundane decisions internally. Major life decisions can take days, weeks if time permits.
>I don't know, maybe the reason so many of you are so miserable is because you haven't actually experienced this because you've never been still enough and patient enough to have a moment of what the Taoists refer to as "wei wu wei": action no-action. Passivity within your own nature.
No, it's more that by your description you don't sound secure. You say you're a writer but don't make a living from your writing and your excuses and tangents made you sound kind of strange.
What do you do for living?
I'm a labour organizer and a professional shit-disturber. I used to host a couple of radio shows. And from the sound of it, what you consider to be "secure" is just stable. I don't want a stable life. Never have. I want *adventure*. I want challenges and struggles. I want to taste the full variety of things this world has to offer. Right now, for example, I am the caretaker at a union hall for people who make their living on the street, like buskers, scrappers, panhandlers, and street vendors. I renovated the building with my own hands (it's a hundred years old and used to be a factory, and was abandoned for a decade), and I'm slowly getting it into shape. I've been wanting to do this for about 15 years, and I've slowly been acquiring the skills and resources to do it. Now I'm living my dream. When it's done, I'll move on to something else.
But hey. if sitting behind a desk for 40 years and then retiring to Florida is your idea of the good life, then be my guest. I've got what I wanted from life, so you should get what you want too. Just be very sure it IS what you want, because there's no take-backs or do-overs.
It is. Jelly?
Not to feel like a cunt but literally no old man will ever sing blues as well as King Krule
Cunts only 20 and singing with this kinda soul. I know you're right though I just felt like sharing an outlier
Thanks man. Liked reading your stuff. It helped me make decision for my own life.
It is like when the guy who luckied out his first and only gf in HS 10+ years ago tells you it is easy to get in a relationship. Since normies treat the things you said as basic stuff, they think something must be wrong with you. If you don't miss a limb, this wrong means you are a bad person. You must be a creep, a pervert and a lazy bum.
Don't you ever want someone to continue your legacy? I will feel as though i've failed myself if I never have kids. Literally the beginning of the universe and trillions of random occurrences have created what I am today, every single one of my ancestors since the first cell split has procreated. Do you feel fine in being the end of that chain?
"All created thing perish. All created things are grief and pain. All forms are unreal. One who knows and sees this becomes passive in pain; this is the way that leads to purity." -- Gautama Buddha
Robotfriend, even the Sun will one day die. The galaxies themselves will die. Even the Universe will one day die a final, irrevocable heat death and nothing you or I did will have made the slightest difference to this. I don't pretend to know what this "life" thing is for, but I if its only function is to prolong my gene plasm then I don't much care whether I've fulfilled it. And I think this kind of dispassion only comes with a life of struggle and failure and misery. The Gautama Buddha taught that enlightenment comes from despair. It's only when the Universe has defeated us that we can see things for what they really are -- and ironically become free to do as we please.
I don't think I "evaded" it, but if you want a more prosaic and less thoughtful answer, I'm asexual. Children has never been on the books for me. I'm forever grateful that I was born asexual and never had to waste my time or money on what the entire rest of the world seems to regard as overwhelmingly urgent.
I'm 23, yet what I find most surprising as I age is how much worse life can get. you think you knew despair as a youngster yet it was only a glimmer of true despair. and this train cannot bes stopped
what i've deduced from this post is that if you don't get your shit together by 30 you will have lost your fucking mind..
I'm 29, and yes it just does keep getting worse. Mine was due to a bad illness when I was coming on 24, I was starting to come out of my shell then got hit and went back in forever.
Some of us aren't good enough to make it even if we do try. I spent my 20s trying all the time, and for the years of hard work and overcoming shit I have nothing but debt to show for it. You don't just become a success if you put the effort in, that's the biggest load of shit out there.
Fuck are you me? I was at the apex of life at 23 (grad school, job, lost a lot of weight) then I fell to a debilitating illness that caused me to lose sight for 9 months (slowly getting better during that time) and gain all of my weight back due to steroid medication. I'm glad to be better now, but I was never able to pick back up where I started.
I was on steroids as well, they made me so angry I smashed the oven door at the time for no real reason. It was weird shit. It was those pink tablets you dissolve in water that I can't remember the name of.
Get a college degree from a cheaper school in a useful degree that trains you for a specific job.
The easiest may be accounting.
You can meet friends through other commuters, and a work place. It will give you a purpose
Or join the military
>that really loves you
>that bitch will begin to drag you through the emotional mud as one of you ends highschool and she has trouble processing her emotions on realizing she doesnt want a serious long distance one
As Doug Stanhope once said, "Life is like a movie. If it's sucked every second so far, there is no reason to believe that it's suddenly gonna get better right at the end. Nobody should blame you for walking out early."
If your life got better I won't see you on /r9k/ to post a pessimist an opinion.
It's like when I'm on the mrarra with my +30 friends smoking weed and they are talking about how life is sucks and how they are the most wise people cuz they know that...