tried to socialize today at a ssbm tournament at my school could not socialize, everything i said and was while there was putrid. the looks of pity or scorn. i left quickly but damn that hurt for a bit. i'll live
>>25806072 I got into that funk as well. I was severely depressed after my girlfriend of 2 years cheated on me and left me. Shit hurt, distanced myself quite a bit. The best thing to do is find those friends that you can be yourself around and go out with them. Grab a drink, catch a movie, he'll, do something in a group. If you don't push yourself to do it, you won't be happy and you'll just get yourself in a rut.
My dreams are what I have been thinking about. I need to find a way to make them more vivid. I hope I never run out of dreams that transcend my meager existence. I dream about amazing places and the feeling the places give are so magical. If I could paint them that would be great.
>>25806046 i didnt jump on the table and have an autistic fit. what i said was irrelevant it was more just that i had a terrible energy. i got no sleep the night prior and i was anxious and forcing conversation and really i didn't have anything in common with anyone. theres nothing really to be said about it it just suuucked
>>25806128 i also forgot to mention I lost contact with most of my friends and the few I had left either stabbed me in the back or are using me. I need to find a way to meet new people. my grandparents told me to go to church but ehhh... I hate singing
>>25806193 Sounds brutal man, honestly one of the best things to do is to just keep trying. As lame as that sounds, it's really the only thing you can do. We all have those "Christ why did I say that" moments, but it's what we do after that matters. University?
>>25806183 lucid dreaming is a great tool. but it sucks when you dream about being in a happy relationship then you wake up and realize how alone you are.thats why I just lucid dream about zombie apocalypses,flying ,and doing super drugs now
>>25806210 Sounds like me dude. Ex lied to everyone and said I was abusive. My true friends stayed but I lost a lot of people. I decided to travel over the summer while working, meeting new people, trying new things. The church thing sounds like a good idea. A trick is to get to the point where you hang out outside of church.
Severe anxiety and depression here, failed suicide once. Forced to do college sport which I despise and hate the coaches. Coach basically freaked out today and is going to torture us the rest of the season, so rn I'm thinking of whether I want to quit or not I really don't want to have to go back on my heavy meds
>>25806222 yeah well, honestly i'm just glad i tried. it's a part of life. i think what you said is wrong actually. i think the key is to actually not live like shit so you end up naturally having a good and positive energy. it's less about sharpening "social skills" and more about cultivating the disposition that would lend space for those social skills to find their way into your person. in my experience at least it'a proven to be true though i have no friends at school i'm not lonely.. solitude is something i genuinely enjoy much moreso nowadays but i'd like to expand out of my comfort zones yes uni
I hate the current state of my life right now, so much time lost. I got to fuck a pretty girl this year but I was too dependant and boring so she dumped me, I guess this was lack of experience with women and so much bad luck or lies, really don't know. What I know is that I have to concentrate in my carrer more than ever to have what I want, but this kind of stuff makes it really hard and put me back in the old habbits, like staying in bed all day long without doing nothing. However I feel more capable of doing things after the rejection, it's a strange feeling, like I can be myself from now on, and got rid of a complex I had for years.
I guess I just want to fuck and have money, i'm a fucking normie in the end.
I've played a game for years and outside two people (whose contact didn't even stem from playing that game) everyone I ever talked to either treated me like a child or outright threw a spergtastic middle finger at me, usually along the lines of calling me brain damaged or just plain dumb
One of the two that wasn't an asshole quit the one game we had in common (which happens to be the only multiplayer I play anymore) and I'd honestly never want to encourage him to play this shitty game ever again, but at the same time I struggle to think up some excuse to have natural, unawkward conversation with him. I'd be utterly devastated if he started acting like I was weird or acted like I was an annoyance. I'm just terrified of approaching him. The other one was a girl and for similar reasons I can't really communicate with her, and on top of that there's the added barrier of her simply being a she that makes it that much harder to have a "natural conversation" where it doesn't feel like I'm being some annoying weirdo when all I want to do is talk to my friends except now I don't think they think of me as a friend anymore I haven't talked to either of them in so long oh god
Fucking My boss at work is keeping me from transferring positions because he feels like I'm not doing well enough or something Whatever it is he keeps skirting around the subject of me leaving my department for one that better suits my skill set
I wish I was rich so I could live in a nice place and not be stuck in this shithole I'm currently in because wew lad does tearing down the paneling and floor of a room, and having to place sheetrock and all that stuff SUCK ASS.
It baffles me how fucking retarded people can be. You have no fucking clue.
I mean there's no point being specific here but most of the shit that's going on in my mind is all due to people being fucking dumbasses. I have a somewhat hard time comprehending how fucking dumb people can get. oh my god. and here on 4chan you have pure unfiltered retardation.
Work pisses me off, all of my customers are fucking idiots. Working retail has made me hate people.
It's so fucking annoying when people ask me questions with obvious answers or approach me with shit like "OH IM A TOTAL TECHNO IDIOT LOL HERES MY DILLEMA BUT TELL IT TO ME IN STUPID SPEAK??" like bitch are you baiting me?
OR like when yall come in to buy something and complain the entire time about how much you hate shopping at my store it just gets right up under my skin shop the fuck somewhere else then damn???
Got a gf. She still likes to play mmos with a guy she admittedly used to like. Learn she only changed her mind about him because she met me. Constantly feel like she'll eventually leave me for him. Can't tell her to cut ties since that was her only friend before meeting me although we have argued about him. Keep enduring it so she has a friend. It really hurts.
i spent 9 years as a drug addict in basically self-imposed exile but the addiction was in many ways my way of dealing with my depression and loneliness. i've been clean for a year now, and i'm doing really well. went back to school, have a 4.0, lost 90 lbs, moved into my own place, but i have virtually no friends and girls want absolutely nothing to me. i'm not going to relapse, but i thought the grass was going to be a little bit greener than this.
today was a particularly hard day because i had sort of established a "friendship" with a girl at school. we would always get to class early and talk and i thought we got along really well. basically she's transferring to another school and before the semester ended she agreed she would give me a textbook i need for next semester. so i emailed her, told her we could meet at a coffee place and i have no idea what happened after that. i think maybe she misconstrued it as me asking her out or something and shit got weird. she didn't get back to me for a long time, and then 3 days before classes are starting she emailed me back and made up a story about spilling coffee on the textbook and it being completely unreadable so now it's clear to me she not only doesn't really consider me a friend but she doesn't even want to see me again for 5 minutes to give me a textbook.
i just feel really low right now for some reason. i feel like no matter what i do i'm always going to be alone and miserable.
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