What would you do if you were god?

Make a female god to be my gf

Turn every normie into an ugly autist

Feel the burn, niggers

Wander randomly around the world and help people out in small ways.

Like a god or the omni version of God from monotheism?

I would make a simple arrangement that I would put in writing, including in stone, in different locations around the world in the dominant language of that location a simple deal, set of rituals, and basic code of conduct.

How it works is people can ask/pray/wish for reasonable things that they need help with, preferable by following ritual guidelines (but expectations can be made) but in exchange they must do something or promise to do something positive (as laid out in the code) in my name, or make a reasonable and meaningful sacrifice in some way. To be eligible they must follow or at least try there best to follow the basic code of conduct or else they fall out of my favor for being a dick.
If they promise something and don't deliver or otherwise try to cheat god then they will be cursed in proportion to their request, or at the very least have it revoked.

Hopefully my followers would work to make the world a better place, and in exchange I make their lives better when they ask.

Other then that I would leave everyone else alone for the most part.

>>25786152
isn't that how stuff like "Santa Muerte" and other pagan stuff supposed to work?

I wonder how well this thread would do on ether /x/ or /pol/?
I am sure it would probably be funny on /b/ or /tg/ too.

I don't think it will get much traction here at this hour.

I would separate my room from reality, give myself a perpetual internet connection and only intervene in the outside world if something threatened the internet. Just like real god.

>>25786152
So you are basically Satan?

>>25786648
No, I don't see why that would be the first thing that comes to mind.
>>25786242
I do admit it would be much more similar to a "pagan" god relationship with its followers then in modern monotheistic religions.

File: image.jpg (31KB, 300x339px) Image search: [Google]

31KB, 300x339px

>>25786606
>God is real
>he's a shut-in NEET autist with no life
>probably posts here
>mfw

I would create a fantastic flying palace-city filled with magic and wonder, then wander across the world and pick up a few people at random every few weeks. I'd also get a few documentary crews up so they can televise the whole thing. Wealthy people would offer their entire fortunes to join, but I would just laugh and pick up some random street urchin instead.

>>25785655
Do you mean if I was literally god or if I was me but I had gods powers?

File: 1452840835527.png (820KB, 898x1276px) Image search: [Google]

820KB, 898x1276px

I would increase the weight, height, muscle mass, assertiveness, intelligence and horniness of all new generations of girls, while making new boys grow up shorter, weaker, with less body hair, more submissive and cuter. Picture related would be an average 10 year old girl.

tunr myself into a woman

>>25785655
this is the worst idea I'd ever heard

>>25785655
I'd do two chicks at the same time.

I would turn half of the world's population into CIA, and the other half into Bane.

I'd be a trickster god. Let the world run its course but troll the shit out of everybody.

Grant all non normies forbidden knowledge too.

>>25789547
What's the next step in your master plan?

>>25789937
>What's the next step in your master plan?
Crash the Earth into the sun.

resurrect elliot rodger

Shut myself and create different earth with different scenario for my own entertainment and if i get bored watching anime .

I honestly think if I had the power of a god I'd just fuck off to another universe because of how much the power would alienate me.

However, if I was simply a human with a huge amount of power/wealth to the point where I might as well be a god...

>End world hunger through birth control programs
>Jumpstart scientific research, make mandatory genetic enhancement a thing (no more genetic diseases, average IQ goes from what is now 100 to what is now 130)
>Use my overwhelming power to build up infrastructure around the world, re-building most large cities to be pedestrian friendly and utilize public transit
>Make cheap transportation for everyone in the form of maglev trains across every continent
>Create a huge island in the Atlantic where my home would be, consisting or an impressive city surrounded by picturesque villas and farmland, with everything built in a neo-classical style
>Have space travel progress rapidly to the point where we have bases on the Moon and Mars, as well as space stations with artificial gravity within ten years

And last, but not least:

>Have everyone on Earth be assigned to their soul mate, so no one is lonely and everyone has a qt 3.14

I'd pretty much do what The Outsider does in Dishonored.
Pick people in interesting situations and give them supernatural powers to see what they do.

Or maybe create magic usable by humans, along with a lot of magical creatures and see how magitech Earth arises and colonizes the stars. I wouldn't interfere much, I'd rather just change the rules of the world and see how it fares.

I'd probably be just as vengeful and wrathful as the Abrahamic god and then fuck off to another dimension and forget about earth because humanity just doesn't learn to stop being degenerates even when I kill them all every 1 or 2000 years.

>>25785655
I'd probably create a self-sustaining universe, using a set of physical laws so that it could go on and on forever without my intervention, and just watch as planets form and life springs up and some of that life becomes sentient and begins to question its existence.

kill jews man

File: 1452290467271.gif (2MB, 300x369px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 300x369px

Blow up the sun.

Play videogames all day.
I mean what else would I do?
I have no ambitions and no goals anyway might as well do nothing.
Also torture every Person involved in Dark Souls 3 for eternity if they fuck up again.

Make people super saiyans

I would warp around the world introducing myself and playing pranks on them.

>>25786510
>funny on /b/

How would it be honestly? /b/ was bad but now its complete shit except some good threads that come once every blue moon