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How do I conquer shyness?
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001

Thread replies: 101
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How do I conquer shyness?

I have no friends. I've never come close to getting a girlfriend. I can't make friends online. I really want a friend but I just get so nervous.

Even doing basic stuff like waiting in line at the grocery store and talking to the cashier makes me want to cry. I would rather be lost than have to ask a stranger for directions. Talking on the phone makes me want to throw up.
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I don't want to live like this.
there's no fix

get a prescription for anti-anxiety drugs and hope for the best
I'm almost 30 and about the same. I've overcome it enough to hold small conversations, get jobs and support myself, but I've never been the first to talk to someone in my entire life. Don't have any advice...just put yourself in places where people might talk to you anyway I guess. I have never been able to get over it. Have hardly any friends and no gf obviously but I'm content enough.
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I could help you OP. What's your steam?
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I feel the same way anon. God forbid someone comes and knocks on the door to my apartment.
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Any time I get a text message or a phone call, I legitimately start to sweat.

I want to be normal. I want to be normal. I want to be normal but I can't do it.
I don't have a steam but I have a skype if that's okay
c-can I add you guys too?
I hate being shy. I feel like I'm generally just a lot more hesitant, emotional, and submissive than than the average person. I really don't like it. In another life I'd be a cute waifu but for now I'm a wimpy dude.

I'm not even gay. Things would be easier if I was. I like girls, but girls hate this personality type.
I feel you. Sometimes I think I might be gay though. So there's that, but I check out girls in public places almost exclusively. Idk what's wrong with me I'm fucked in the head ;_;
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>Ask teacher to go the restroom
>Stutter uncontrollably and speak very quickly
>Teacher looks at me strangely
>Spaghetti spilling everywhere.
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Anyone else burst into tears a lot in elementary school?
I feel like I was at the counselor twice a week for a while there...
I burst whenever I had to do oral presentations, I dodged them in high school by simply taking the F for the project or getting someone else to do most of it if it was a team project
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>Alright class, we're going to go around the room and introduce ourselves. You'll stand, say your name, and say something interesting about yourself.
I wonder if teachers know how much anxiety this gives shy kids. I wanted to jump out the window any time we had to do this.
I-I'm anon and umm I-I like p-pizza. I mean cake, I mean I-I
>eyes start welling up
I'm fine how are you!?
>Sits down and puts head down
Carry a flask and take a sip to loosen yourself up.

Just kidding. Don't do this. I'm shy and an alcoholic.
Fuck this. I can feel my past shaking while hearing my turn to say my name
>"H-hi, my n-name is anon and I like to p-play videogames..."
>immediately sit down
>pull out matches
>light self on fire
I used to be really shy but I kinda conquered it by playing a game with two friends. One of us had to talk to a girl on the street, if he didn't do it he had to pay the other two $2 each. It worked pretty well. I'm still shy to a degree but much less than before.

Now, I had two friends on the first place, so it's much less severe than your case likely.
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>too fucked up and shy for normal people
>too normal for the "gay steam anime RP" crowd
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This feel is a strong feel.
The middle fucking sucks. Let me be a dudebro or enjoy my full on autistic bliss. Why am I burdened to know the shallow ends of both?
/r9k/ is supposed to be the middle ground. But it's become a dating advice board as time as gone on.
Just give up and RP. It doesn't have to be gay, and it's fun sometimes.
Describe your own symptoms
>hands shaking
>fast heartbeat
>thing in my throat
I wonder if I'll ever stop having these
I can't. It makes me cringe. I'm trying to hang on to my last shreds of humanity, not fall into the abyss.

>be me
>be in high school
>raise hand to ask question
>teacher asks if anyone wants to go take books to the library right when I lift my hand
>two Stacey girls lift their hands to get out of class
>teacher makes me go with one of them
>too shy to say I just wanted to ask something
>we push the cart of books to library
>books keep falling out of it
>keep talking about how these silly books keep falling out haha
>haha yeah anon these books

I've never been more embarrassed in my life
i can be your online friend on steam, but i have bf.
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I didn't mean to quote anybody...
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any attempt to cover that gap would just be filled with either normals or gay weebs, there is no home for us
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>tfw hate cookie-cutter ERPers and hate finding the good stuff

I'll manage with the few pump and dumps I have.
We should make our own board.
It could be a home where people like us don't belong on either spectrum can hang out

...oh wait...
I can't into rp because I always feel like it isn't rp and I start developing feelings... It sucks to be this ignored
I honestly haven't ever felt like I've "belonged" anywhere. Not at school, not with friends when I used to have them, not in any clubs or anything. Even on 4chan I sometimes feel like a stranger.

I feel like I'm passively observing life. I want to participate but I don't fit in anywhere.
So, firstly in assuming that the posters here are vey young, say early 20s or late teens. Secondly, I'd like to talk to people suffering this way, I'm a total normie but weirdly, I really do care
Every person I have ERP'd with has fallen in love with me, it's cute.
>entire face turns red
>shake (hands, but whole arms if very bad
>close eyes
>extreme heat and sweat in face and hands
>lisp becomes more pronounced
that must mean you are good at it, do you have skype?
you're a whore
original comment
Are you me? my hands fucking shake so much even when I'm "talking" to someone online.
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>be me in pre-school
>shy as fuck
>have to go pee
>need to ask one of the teachers to take me to the bathroom
>come up behind a teacher who's with someone else
>start poking her (too quiet to get her attention otherwise)
>she doesn't notice
>poking intensifies
>still doesn't respond
>end up peeing myself in front of everyone (though I don't know if they noticed)
>teacher takes me out of the classroom to get changed
>have to wear purple sweat pants the rest of the day
I do but I am not currently looking for someone as I'm a 1 person only type and currently have 1 person.

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o-okay I understand.
I wish someone would erp with me and make me fall in love with them.
I get stage fright so bad at public restrooms I literally can't pee at a urinal if there's even a hint of another person, even if I feel like I'm about to explode, and then It just gets embarrassing when i'm standing there and nothing comes out.

I've learned to cope with it by occupying stalls and peeing by sitting down like a faggot.

If there's one thing I could wish away, it would probably be the ability to pee anywhere I'd fucking want regardless of how many people are near me
If I woke up tomorrow and looked like 10/10 Chad, I think my life would still be shitty. I cannot talk to people.

I've never had a female friend. I wouldn't even know how to hold a conversation with a girl if she was interested in me, let alone actually dating her and doing stuff with her.

I just want someone to stay inside with and hug really tight and nothing has to be said.
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Don't have much physical symptoms.
It just becomes practically impossible to talk unless I'm answering a question and when I answer my voice is shaky as fuck.
I usually just stand there with an expression of pure stoicism as I'm screaming in my mind.
I was in school once, making a project with a group of girls
>welding some mothafucking LEDs
>oh shit this is going to look great
>girls are already ignoring me while I do all the work
>ask for a hand
>the hottest comes
>I'm not ready for this
>start shaking
>breathing mode: MANUAL
>try to weld this fucker but I can't because of shaking
>she asks "are you THAT nervous?"
>n-no I'm just in an uncomfortable position
>she kinda smiles for some reason
>I finish with the LEDs and go to my chair away from theirs
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I'm sure you can find someone fellow anime, I merely like to play with one person until they move on. Plus, I only like submissive types too.
I hate the pee shyness so much. It's embarassing having to wait for a stall when I only have to pee.
And it's not like I'm worried about someone looking at my dick, I just can't relax enough to pee with people around me.
So no one wants my help? I'm here to talk if you want it
Exactly. Frankly I don't care who the fuck looks at my dick. If you're so interested go for it. Public showers are EZ PZ.

But fucking peeing...man what the hell.
I'm a submissive type desu. It's not my place to get in between you and someone else though that's rude.
I'll find someone I hope.
I did find one anon and we had a couple nice conversations but I've been scared to message him and he hasn't messaged me :(
>far lower left of that image
It's getting cold, isn't it?
Why not give it a shot? Unless they have a lot of partners, then maybe it's awkward, who knows.
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Lately I've just been trying to come with terms that I'll be alone forever. Once I get past that hurdle, I think things will be okay.

I don't offer anything in a relationship. I'm boring, I'm weak and mushy emotionally, I'm submissive, I'm sensitive, and I'm so fucking shy.

If I found a friend or a girlfriend, they would get sick of me, for sure. I'm too clingy and pathetic.
Idk...we came up with a Rp-ing universe and everything in google drive. And our characters and stuff we just haven't actually RP'd yet. We're in vastly different time zones though so it's weird. Usually when I get online he's about to go to bed. :/
Ment for oringallll

>Be in Highschool
>Everyone is quiet
>Try to ask teacher a question
>So embarrassed I fuck up the entire sentence.
>Just stop talking.
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>no reply
ok fuck you
i'm out of this thread dont even reply this post because i won't read, loser
Oh I understand, I find a lot of people just want to be used in my case though, so I don't really get too many luxuries in creating characters and whatnot. I think they find it simply acceptable that I have a bigger than average dick and it's exciting all the same.

Definitely not a fan of the timezone differences though, a lot of the time people are horny at night when things are quiet and it'll end up being mid day for me.
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>Be me, 13 normal highschool studend a bit of a clown
>we gon on class vacation for 1 week
>go play cards with 2 girls alone in the girls dorm

>they had alot of candy it was awesome

>we had fun, but nothing sexual
>her "boyfriend" came up to me the next day, told me to stay away from her, i being alpha fucked him verbally up.

>now 20, beta, social anxiety, depression

All that happend after i got internet

>tfw you could have been a chad.. but now you are a beta faggot.

Fuck Internet, and fuck me for being such a bitch towards my mother for wanting to destroy my pc.
I've done a little bit of the shallow stuff too but I like embodying the character. true role playing not just
>My dick is hard anon, suck it
>Aww yes anything you say master
I want to actually get to know the other character and fall for them :3
Yeah, the quickie stuff is nice and all but the master stuff is overplayed and boring too. Needs some spice.

I'm glad you wanna do the good stuff though, getting a good dom for that sorta thing can be tricky too. They can be very generic, do you like long sessions too?
ill be your friend dude, give me your skype and ill add you.
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every time i've tried to make a friend on /r9k/, they've gotten bored of me within a few weeks

oh well
Yea, long sessions are great if the chemistry is right.
Then you're perfect! Go out and there and get some cock anon!
Change weeks for days and there is my situation. I have a boring life, so my convos turn to be boring too. Also I keep asking and then feel like I interrogated someone
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Thanks anon you turned my night around.
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Force yourself to talk to people.
Realize that normies run into multiple people throughout the day and will probably forget about you by the next day even if you sperg out or make them uncomfortable.
Force yourself to interact with others through volunteer work or something, would be a good thing to start with since the people you meet through volunteering are more likely to be nicer, thus easier to interact with.
If you have trouble looking people in the eye, try looking at their nose instead.
No worries friend, I am confident you are optimal for receiving dickings. I wish I could help take care of ya but I've got my dedication to uphold!
>Force yourself to talk to people.
>Force yourself to interact with others
I know you're trying to be nice and helpful but you don't understand how hard this is
I have problems choosing left or right, then I sperg out because counting 3 secs looking at each one
You're a good dom. It's nice to see someone that wants to hold onto their sub and not have 20 floozys dancing around their feet.
Become a femboy?
Yes anon, yes
I feel like everyone is in their own little bubble and I'm just bumping into people without getting to know anyone
Oh I'm sure they'll look for new flavors eventually, most subs are sluts like that. But it's okay! There's always more for the taking.

I think it's the same for both sides really, you'll just have to find a keeper who hits all your notes. Have you had that in the past?
I'm too wide and bulky for that, haha. My own fitness is one of the only things I take pride in.

Also I'm straight.
No, I'm relatively new to the erp'ing... :3
Oh! Well then. You'll certainly find it if you're new then, then maybe like 2 years later realize it was meh and get into more intense stuff should it come to that, who knows. Either way like I said, I'm confident in ya.

Anywho, I need to rest now. You take care friend, thanks for chatting with me.
Sort of
I was a loner until sometime in high school.
My parents forced me to volunteer at a hospital where I had to make patients feel comfortable. Met like 10+ complete strangers every day, stuttering and making people feel uncomfortable until I got the hint and left their room. After a while you just realize how little people actually pay attention to others, people are too worried about their own fuck ups and people around them.

Just look at the closest eye to you, or look back and force for longer then 3 seconds, would look less awkward.
That sucks. I have a lot of fun with submissive boytoys
>tfw transcended anxiety about the outside and now just avoid going out all together
>After a while you just realize how little people actually pay attention to others, people are too worried about their own fuck ups and people around them.
THIS so much

literally nobody cares about you, and if you act awkward or weird they'll care even less about you

and its not like you care about them in the first place
Then why we try so hard to make them care about us?
But what if it's somebody I'm trying to be friends with, or somebody I find attractive?
the whole point of this thread is to conquer shyness. i'm not saying you should or not, but if you're in this thread you must have a reason why.

it's up to you
i know this feel

surely there have to be women out there that like submissive/sensitive guys that aren't crazy?
No, there's not. As far as I've found. And the only one's that do have a mommy fetish and will treat you like a child. It weirded me out too much.
I conquered my shyness to the point that I could approach strangers in my classes.

But by now, I don't bother anymore. Things don't go anywhere anyway. I have a few low tier friends in my classes, nothing more than acquaintances really. Then for some, after some time of not seeing them I would be like "Hi <name>" (yes, I forced myself to remember all their names) and they would just look really uncomfortable.
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fuck me, dude

I guess I could be a "switch" but it's so unnatural to me. I don't know how to flirt, I don't know how to talk dirty, I don't know how to be alpha in a relationship

I don't want to be such a fucking pussy
idk what the fuck I'm doing either desu.

At this point I feel like I'm Bi but I only check out women when I'm in public. I've had faggy thoughts in the past but idk if they were just random fantasy or not.I wish I could just be happy for fucks sake.
Fake it til you make it, bro.
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Hello, this is Alice. Mind telling me why you are using my likeness in this thread?
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go away dweebus
How do you make friends online?
I don't like online games but I tried playing them. It didn't get me any friends.
I don't want to post contact info on 4chan, every thread for stuff like that sets off all my alarms, like "post in this thread and eventually everyone on the internet is going to know you and call you a faggot!"
It always feels like I'm on the outside of some massive in-joke and I'm all alone out here.
No clue. I feel like online relationships and friendships always sputter out quickly, at least for me. Either it needs to be elevated to a real-life relationship or it dies.
That's been my experience as well, even if I try to keep it going. It usually just ends up with me being the only one putting in effort.

The only thing I can suggest is to play more online games, especially with /jp/.
Fuck. 2 close.
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Pretty much me. Tried talking to people before online and we only talked a little before running out of things to talk and never messaging again.

I did make hang out with the few (three?) people from /jp/ during the PSO2 beta. I wish I realized how good friends were and got their contacts before I stopped logging in.

Lately I've played FFXIV since launch (but with lots of breaks between) and I talk to maybe 3 people in it because they are in my free company. None of them share my other hobbies though so there's nothing outside of the game.

The idea of making friends sounds nice but I naturally don't do it for some reason. I think I'm meant to be mostly alone with some acquaintances in the places I frequent.
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