>you will never be a cool teenage protagonist
>you will never know what is was like to be an intelligent high school dropout in the 80s
>you will never feel the magic of playing runescape as a kid ever again
>you will never live in a world where everyone is equally attractive
>you will never be able to fantasize about your high school teachers again while you are in their class
osrs is shit, play rs3 its the real robot community. OSRS is what tumblr girls and every streamer play
>tfw cooking rocktails on a portable range
Like, half of these I feel pretty often: https://www.youtube.com/user/obscuresorrows
Speaking of, that place is pretty good at giving you a bunch of sadness you never had, or at least could never describe. I'd recommend not going there if you're feeling down.
>you will never be the boss right before the final boss that is actually much harder then the final boss
>you will never force the PCs to step up their game to a whole new level or get completely wiped.
>you will never have theme and battle music so epic that raises goosebumps in people in the next room
>will never be featured in hypothetical death battles argued over by nerds and poorly animated on youtube and newgrounds.
>you will never be a protaganist-turned-villain of a video game series who isn't really evil and has solid and arguably valid reasons for his actions who squares off against the new protaganist who replaces you and dies in battle against his party, giving an amazing heartfelt monologue before dying
>people on 4chan will never debate about who the real hero of the series was and post things like "Anon did nothing wrong"
>you will never be an attractive surfer boy living in California in the 50s and early 60s
>tfw in the low population area you live in, you will never find another competent and qt but well educated occultist gf to teach sexual magick to
Why would you want to be a normie protagonist, when you can be the one-and-only true robot protagonist?
>you will never have a band of wheelchair-bound cougars lusting for your cock
>Will never start off as a traveling equipment NPC that has all the rarest loot and helps build powerful custom shit for the heroes
>You will never get a spin off adventure game where you hunt down artifacts and rare items
>You will never make a living adventuring in general
>ywn have a loli who is curious about sex and does everything you tell her
>you will never be the dictator of a small politically isolated militarized nation.
>you will never go on an adventure with 3 of your friends
I can't believe someone else wrote this.
Been haunting me ever since this Spongebob episode
>you will never be a buff vampire hunter that saves maidens and whips dracula to fucking death
>you will never hear an obscure song on the radio and spend years trying to figure out what it is
I did that. I turned down 4 girls. It still hurts.
Why were you so fucking retarded past me? Every fucking chance to go to normie city you fucking fucked it up. I hate you so fucking much and I'm glad I killed you last fall you self important prick.
>You will never be a NYC comedian in the late 90s early 2000s
>You will never be a regular on tough crowd and opie and anthony
>get carded by asian lady at walgreen's
>still have a chance of being a shonen hero
never give up senpai
>tfw you will never have the joy of adventuring a whole world with your online friends again