>uncle dying of cancer
>not much time left
>I'm 1000 miles away
>mom goes to see him, sends me an email, "last chance" type thing to call or something
What the fuck do I say? I'm not much of a "feeling" person and I honestly don't know what to do.
But I don't actually care, I haven't spent more than ten minutes over the past five years with him and I have no real feelings one way or the other.
At this point I'm thinking of pretending I was at work or something...
I agree it can suck m8, you're thinking to yourself "I essentially don't know this guy, he's fucking dying and the last person he's thinking of is me."
It's likely true.
it's fucking annoying the way Mothers are deadset on having everyone that's important to them be important to each other, when families don't work that way, life isn't a fucking christmas movie where 12 motherfuckers with a history get together in a big house for the season.
I don't know what you should do, personally I subscribe to the belief that when someone is processing their own death and going through a fuck load of mental struggle they don't need literally who's ringing them from fuck knows where, feeling obliged to avoid guilt; but if you can remember whatever dynamic you and he had when you were younger and you think you can retrieve that for a conversation with him man to man you know I guess it can't hurt
>the last person he's thinking of is me
I wish, I think he loves me as a nephew all chrismas-movie style. Our family is tightly knit and there's lots of love, but I kinda just pretend when I'm with them and try to avoid them by working overtime and stuff. They have honestly never done anything wrong, they've been really nice to me and stuff but I just want to be left alone.
I think I'll send my mom an email saying that... I can't even say that my prayers are with him because I'm an apatheist.
I'm back to "what do I even say"
I would say just go ahead and go if you have the funds. Even if you don't get much of an emotional experience out of it, your family and mom would appreciate your support just by being there. And if you do grow emotions later down the road, you wouldn't regret not going and being able to see him one last time. Maybe you could connect with him emotionally when you get there. It'll be good for you. Either way no skin off your back other than a plane ticket which shouldn't be too bad.
Well if your Uncle actually does care about you why the fuck would you not just ring him? So what if it's awkward? Only you and he will know it was awkward and then he'll die and it may as well have never happened
You're just supposed to be there for your family. That guy has bigger problems to worry about. He doesn't give a shit wether or not you show up. It's your mom and the rest of your family that needs you. Also it helps reassure them that you're not going to abandon them in their time of need. Which is a pretty big fear that people have.