When did you realize you were different?
For me it was when puberty hit. Before that I had no trouble making friends or socializing. Then suddenly everyone started getting boyfriends and girlfriends and I was basically ignored by everyone, so I responded to that by just isolating myself off even further and not bothering with anyone anymore.
I am nearly 30 years old now and I've still not learned how to not be this way.
The weird part is I am actually fairly good looking at get approached by women all the time but they get scared off the moment they realize I have the social/relationships skills of a kid.
it's definitely true that it gets harder to socialise and make friends as you get older. the friends you have become acquintances or people you see ALL the time.
but the end of your post suggests that you don't want friends, just a woman. ultimately that means you just want to get laid.
and i just needed to post because i didn't want to feel bad about rolling, praying for 3,4,8, or 14.
I went through some awkward phases when I first left home, pretty naive to my situation and didn't realize there was a social stigma around being a virgin past a certain age. I went through hell for the first couple years until I moved to a place where no one knew me and I could essentially start over and learn to adapt. I withdrew myself a lot, basically became that guy that barely talked. Two things happened: one, people treated me better (relatively) than I had been treated before, because I never gave them a chance to find out how socially retarded I had become; and two, while I actually became more of a sperg due to never talking, I at least learned a bit about how normal people conversed.
Fast forward a decade or so, I'm now 33, essentially in the same boat. I still take the 'less is more' approach to socializing, but I've at least gained the ability to communicate without coming off as a socially inept virgin. It's easier to talk to females, but the hard part is that they have to do most of the initiating. Then just keep the topic about them until they directly ask you a question about yourself, and then keep the answer minimal. Made some decent progress over the past couple years.
never did. I was in a school for autists, and no one was getting in relationships, me included. went to summer camp, practically had qts stalkin my ass. half a year later or so, qts still mirin. feels good man
been there done that. only takes about a year or less of semi dedicated effort to become functional. basically just have to force yourself and submerge into it. get a less attractive gf whose willing to put up with your shit and use her to learn the social ques of romantic interaction.
for friends get a basic knowledge of football and basketball, talk with coworkers about it after a while voila
its all just submersion and observation
>When did you realize you were different?
Immediately upon getting my first taste of a computer at the age of 5 back in 1997. Thanks for showing me the light wololomans.
Pretty much the same. I realised early on in school that my family seemed to value performing well academically far far more than any of my other friend's family did but I didn't think I was that different back then. It took me until puberty/whatever age everyone got to when they started liking girls to realise I just didn't give a shit about any of that and would rather stay at home and play videogames or read manga. Once I found this out I basically gave up on ever trying to become a normalfag and just stayed the way I am until now. I've got a job and whatever and I have work colleagues (but I wouldn't call them friends since I change what I do in my job every 4-6months) and keep in touch with school friends, but all those normalfag desires of wanting to lose your virginity/going out to have fun/traveling the world/doing as many different things as possible are never there and never will be. I don't drive people away because my job has forced me to have good communication skills but I find it easy to move on and not stay in touch with anyone if I want to. It's quite nice actually.
I think the unfortunate part is that I realized it at a young age when I'd get my schoolwork done immediately and have to spend the rest of my classtime watching everyone else struggle and fuck up. Then I'd get perfect marks and everyone would try to make me feel like I was "special." This sort of thing happening all the time in my critical life stage made me start to believe that everything that set me apart - up to and including my flaws - made me better than everyone else. This made me push to keep developing the parts of my personality that were at odds with everyone else, but mostly the parts that were easy to cultivate. So I would feed my laziness, impatience with others, and ungratefulness and think of the ensuing isolation as just proof of me being "better" than everyone else.
Now I've basically rotted my brain away and became a dropout hikiNEET and can really just watch as the people I was "better than" work hard, set goals, and develop genuine empathy and affection towards others. The funny part is that I probably was never "gifted" or anything at all, I just had a really smart but emotionally dead family that was willing to challenge me so they could prove how much smarter they were than me.
Near the end of elementary school I started noticing that girls where only interested in the athletes and unless you were an athlete nobody, guys or girls would respect you. Near the end of middleschool/start of highschool I started noticing that even the nerdy autistic e-sports weeaboo faggots could get gfs and were popular among like-minded piers in their own way, and were just as bad as the jocks
>The weird part is I am actually fairly good looking at get approached by women all the time
you are near the worst type of person, almost as bad as those: "I'm only single because society sucks and fails to meet MY standards" denialist narcissists
>For me it was when puberty hit. Before that I had no trouble making friends or socializing.
Same here, it wasn't until my teenage years that people really started to pick up on my spergy behavior.
i think it was my first day in kindergarten.
i was probably born/raised with a deep insecurity and lack of self esteem, unlike other people who gradually acquire these negative traits.
since i was born with this lack of confidence, naturally as a little kid i looked around me and felt out of place. everyone was bigger, seemed smarter, louder, more aggressive. it was like everyone was born alpha and here comes this little beta me. to compensate and attempt to conform, i became a class clown.
i said to myself, i gotta find a way to fit in so i'll try to make them laugh, entertain them. it worked okay up until high school but by then i was burned out. years of trying to be cool with little to show and a couple of laughs left a huge emotional void in me.
the insecurities and lack of self esteem deepened even further and today i just stay at home and play vidya
i'm 28, turning 29 this year
I remember being 7 or 8 years old and very clearly thinking that I would never have a wife or girlfriend. I didn't didn't even begin to try until after college, which of course was way too late. I'll be 31 in a few months.
I'm decent looking. I can't say women approach me "all the time" because I hardly ever meet any women. But I have been approached by good looking women. It doesn't ever mean anything or lead to sex, because autism. I can't even "date down" with 5/10 girls because very soon a 6/10 normie guy shows up who they can tell is much more into them.
>The weird part is I am actually fairly good looking at get approached by women all the time but they get scared off the moment they realize I have the social/relationships skills of a kid.
Same here except reverse. It feels like the more normie someone is, the more incapable they are of conversation. Most people that are as non-social as I am always understand each others' subtle nods when we both notice the irony or hilarity of a situation, or are capable of skipping the "what I did this weekend" routine and talk about anime or games that I'm not even interested in but actively try to get them to indulge about how these games make them feel + theories about the game from an analytical/ prospecting point of view.
NORMIES on the other hand always just state a thing that happened.
>"I went fishing with my cousins! It was soooooo fun!"
"That's cool! I've never been fishing, what's it like?"
>"Oh it's soooooo fun!"
"Did you catch anything cool?"
> visibly see them get annoyed by conversation
> try changing subject
"What are your cousins like?"
>"They are sooooooo crazy, one time they got so drunk they puked in our living room!"
> trying to find some way to follow up on that
> don't want to use my own anecdote to seem like I'm trying to make the conversation about me, because people think assholes do that
> think about how fucking stupid these cousins must look
> think about how much I hate parties
"So uh, any other crazy stories?"
> they visibly get bored of conversation/ get distracted
Rollin', rollin', rollin'
Rollin', rollin', rollin'
Keep movin', movin', movin'
Though they're disapprovin'
Keep them dogies movin'
I realized i was different when I was about 12. around that age i realized that i was smart and kind and respectable but had never met a single person in my life that actually gave a fuck about me or didn't try to humiliate me. Then I began to wonder what it was that makes something like me, and I realized I knew nothing of my composition, this drove me to spasmodic fits of sadness and intense feelings of loneliness. And around age 14, i began to make friends, but I felt so hollow and empty, like I was just a shell and there is nothing beneath my skin. And then I got really depressed and stopped talking to everyone. Now i'm here.
i fucking hate my life, also rolling
nigger I feel the same way. We're just too smart for normal people. Normies don't see any value in meaningful conversation and instead fill the void that is their need for social interaction with humor and self-indulgence. It's the only way they know how to make themselves feel fulfilled socially.
Hey you're not special even if you are literally an evolved mind among the human species.
Think about what you deserve, and think about whether or not you actually deserve it, and think about how no one else deserves anything and that we're all deeply flawed/ hypocritical.
You ACTUALLY become special when you've got a good balance of positive and negative outlook. I don't mean "Life is ok, but also life kinda sucks."
>"The universe is an amazing elaborate cycle of change and mystical forces that transcends dimensions, and I'm lucky to have consciousness to observe and even think about/ question/ experience it"
>"Everything needs to burn. We are so fucked. Everything is hopeless, people are far more evil than the villains they paint, and despite being more psychologically fucked up and corrupt than regular egocentric criminals, I'm too empathetic and sentimental to impose the lashback humanity desperately needs to get back in touch with reality."
I would literally take humour and even degenerate meme-spouting/ "HEY HAVE YOU SEEN THAT CAT VIDEO" shit. Hell, I'd love to get into a conversation with a retarded conspiracy theorist who believes Obama is a muslim lizard on this flat earth, just because I want to respectfully indulge them but see if I can change their point of view/ inject tiny amounts of sense into them over a period of time through some social manoeuvrability.
No, I literally can't even get that; people just go down a list of stuff they did and even when I try to indulge them in "feelings" and "gossip" or even try relating with them by bringing up "embarrasing" things and having a laugh about it (like "oh isn't it funny how you go to check the time on your phone, look at it, put it away, and then realize you didn't actually read the time? And then you do it once more and realize that you forgot to check the time AGAIN? haha")
NOPE. Literally they can't cope with this shit. It amazes me that they find themselves in social situations all their lives but can't manage to communicate.
Maybe they just don't know how to gauge me. Maybe I just need to be more clear about my own "borders" on humour or something. But any time I try to indulge in any kind of emotion to see how I can connect with someone, they are always blocked. They literally can't think about anything besides petty mundane shit.
They know how to communicate, but only with dumb people or people with equal intelligence to their own. That's just what they're used to, because they so rarely ever encounter anyone smart enough to produce anything more than s list of their experiences in a social situation. To them it's like being thrown into a foreign country where everyone has different social customs from their own. But, if you can learn to command normie conversation AND conversatio that signifies your intelligence, you can get a lot of places. I can hold up a conversation with normies pretty well and it's helped me a lot, because they'll recognize that you're smart and respect you more.
I have no value for normie lives so I intend to exploit this skill as much as I can for personal gain. It's a wonderful thing.
I'm very creative, find humour/ irony in everything, I can find ways to teach or explain things to people in very expressive and easy to understand ways. I can get people excited, I can make people feel comfortable, I can make people feel respected by non-aggressively debating.
I can't lead them. They lose interest too quickly, from their OWN topics. Or if I start talking about one of my interests, 5 seconds in they're already looking on their phone/ trying to find someone else in the room.
Really the only skill you need to possess to lead a group of normies is the ability to make them feel something, anything at all. If you can evoke emotions in people with poise, and make them feel respected, they will value your advice and friendship very highly. Like I said earlier, normies seek constant stimulation and entertainment in conversations, the ability to evoke emotions in them is the ability to control. The reason they lose interest in their own conversation topics is because once they divulge into whatever it is they wanted to discuss, the topic loses its novelty and is no longer interesting to them. And honestly, any normie fag doesn't really care about what anyone else's interests are. No way around that, sadly.