Suicide tips and tricks

>>25702676
Curious as to why you're choosing hanging as opposed to helium?

>>25702676
Don't. Just use the suicide bag or take a 200 ft fall.

>>25702676
that's a real sharp edge you got there

>>25702676
Tie your hands as hard as possible before hanging, so you wouldn't be able to free yourself in the last struggle before dying.

I made a small list with my preferred suicide methods:

> Handgun
Pro: Painless, fast
Contra: In case of survival, you become a drooling, plant
>Knife
Pro: Rather quick, no lasting damage in case of survival
Contra: Painful
>Rope
Pro: Relatively safe, relatively quick (about 30 seconds until you loose conciousness)
Contra: ?
>Jump from a big height
Pro: Painless, quick, guaranteed death
Contra: You become a pile of mush and attract attention from normiescums etc.

I want to die in a remote place, so my top pick is the rope.
> Inb4 exit bag
Stop memeing, kiddo.

>>25702839
> preferred suicide methods

mfw you're posting this, so you're alive

>>25702839
Why not a shotgun? Is it because of the mess?
>inb4 exit bag
aint a meme though

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GOAT suicide incoming OP

>acquire gun
>acquire weighted vest
>rent boat
>sail to the middle of a body of water
>stand on edge of boat wearing weighted vest
>trustfall towards water
>shoot face while falling
>weighted vest sends you to deep water

If the gun fails the water has your back. Zero chance of survival or becoming a veggie. Thanks me later.

>>25702676
Is that ThioJoe?

>>25702963
It's MY preferred methods,famalam. It was hard enough getting my hands on a handgun. And yeah, shotgun would demolish your face and I want at least die with some dignity. Thy why I also won't choose the train or high buildings.

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>>25702839

I'd never consider suicde personaly. I'd survive even if I had to eat my own shit daily.
But if I would want to do it, I'd go on a basejumpercliff, on top I'd wait for the sun to set while consumeing a shitton of LSD, I'd put on a nice tune and I'd just jump. Fly a few seconds, enjoy the view and then splat into oblivion. Maybe noone would see me so I could decompose in a natural way.
Bliss

protip: Don't jump infront of a train. You'll ruin every passangers day, plus the driver will probably suffer from depression and trauma

>>25703031
>I can't read file names

>>25703078
>implying I would care about a bunch of normies on a train even if I was alive

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painless and fast

Practice tying knots. If you don't tie it properly or tight enough you'll either be in sheer pain for a really long time or pass out and wake up in a compromising position.

Also you might be too heavy to hang so do your research

>>25703002
> Buy a dozen helium balloons and a revolver.
> Knot the balloon strings into the revolver and shoot yourself.
> No bullet casing because it's a revolver, no gun.
> The perfect crime.

>>25703134
why should they put up with your selfish shit. fuck, the train driver wasn't asking you to unload on to him at 90mph.

>>25703220
As much as I hate normiescum I agree. They certainly don't want to see my corpse, but more importantly I don't want them to see it. Some of them will take out their fucking smartphones and take pictures, which go on some social media sites, fuck that. The only person's day I'll fuck up is the one that finds me.

>>25703149
I'm pretty sure I saw something very similar on a tv show at some point.

is that the troll youtuber that tricks idiots into bricking their consoles, ThioJoe?

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>>25702839
So I want to end it, no memes, but I'm scared I'll end up like a fucking fruit or something, can you tell me exactly where to shoot so I get instakill?

>>25703486

Don't kill yourself please anon. I want you not to die

>>25703486
shotgun, double barrel buckshot, side of the temple. very low chance of vegetation.

>>25703535
what the fuck desu

originalitydesu

>>25703540
I can't afford that, I just own a 9mm, pic related in my last post

>>25703486
Even if you end up a vegetable, your parents will probably turn the machine off and let you go. Not many people actually stay on life support.

>>25703486
shoot your stomach, mate

Might as well go in excruciateing pain

>>25703595
They died lol

>>25703486
Do it, but drink a full bottle of vodka as fast as you can before you pull the trigger. If the bullet doesn't get to you, the alcohol poisoning is gonna finish the job.

>>25703621
im sorry to hear that, my friend

>>25703684
Don't worry, it's being a while already

>>25703486
I remember thread on /suicide/ about this, you need to shoot the part of your brain that controlls breathing and heart (don't know english term), so you need to put the gun in your mouth and shoot up.

Godspeed anon

>>25703734
I'll look it up, thanks

Buy a machine gun and shoot yourself in the guts.

It worked for me ;)

my plan was to buy some heroin and shoot it up and od. is this a good idea or no

>>25703444
>implying people actually follow his advice

top kek m79

>>25703851
t. Heisenberg

>>25703138
does this honestly work? not op but I honestly want to end my life before January is over. I'd like to go gracefully, more then likely my younger brother will find me and I don't want to be splattered, also anyway to take care of shitting and pissing before you die?

>>25703875

Not really, because someone could find you before you die and rescue you; OD is not a reliable method I'm afraid although it sounds cool as fuck

>>25703875
No, don't underrstimate your resistance. You may use a really bad amout of heroin so it won't kill you but pernamebtly damage you.
Another thing is that drugs make you feel good, so you might change your mind halfway through and call for help, worst case scenario, when the damage has been done.
I tried similar thing with meth, i had 2 grams ready. At the time i was completely numb, i was certain i'd do it. After snorting like 1 gram i went batshit crazy, trashed my room and beat up some guy (4 broken ribs, brain damage, never caught tho).

Drugs od generally just isn't a good idea

>>25704049
Instead a really good, foolproof method is passing out on tracks or high building. Use chloroform, or even booze, if you feel like it

>>25704049

Well, meth is shit drug to try to OD on...

>>25704023
if no one were to find me for a while then i would imagine its ok?

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>>25704049
How do you know exactly how many ribs you broke him?

>>25704135

No, read >>25704049 you might get some shitty heroin and not die, or you might something that isn't even heroin and not die either

You could try heroin while trying to kill yourself using a more reliable method, at least it won't hurt that way

>>25704120
It was the only drug i could get in high enough amount to kill me. And yeah, you're 100 % correct

>>25704183
Local newspaper wrote about it, they described me as mentally ubstable, aggresive and extremely dangerous. I kinda feel bad, but the memory of me beating the living shit out of him without holding back or responsibility feels good.
10/10 stress reliever

>>25704289

I wouldn't expect any less from a psychotic break from meth, I don't think they could've charged you with anything under those circumstances other than drug related stuff

can you greentext the whole experience?

>>25704363
>be me
>trying to OD on meth, 1 gram snorted/in my veins
>start hearing whispers, see shadows, something crawling on my back
>start chasing shadows, trying to hit them, but all my effort is vain
>suddenly I'm full of rage, hatred. I've never felt any feeling as strong
>feel like my rage alone could bring this world to ashes
>pick up furniture (i was super strong, tossed tables across room)
>punch a bunch of holes into wall
>run out, start screaming
>23 y/o dude is across the street, run after him
gottagofast.jpg
>catch up in no time, smash him down, lie on him
>each and every one of my hits was meant to kill him, to murder him in the most brutal fashion
>my second punch knocked hin out
>keep beating his head, hear spine crackling
>head keeps going left and right, hate it
>decide to punch his torso
>i hear cracking bones, his skin changing color
feelsgoodman.png
>after about 8 minutes of nonspot beating my rage is gone
>i knew what i've done, didn't give a fuck
>go back to my room, get gum and some water

The aftereffects were fucking hell. My entire body was in pain, i kept vomiting without anything in my stomach, i was starving but i couldn't eat anything. In two days i read about it in newspaper

>>25704593

at least you didn't get caught

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>>25704593
That's...uhm...well that's...something, anon.

The only things you don't come back from is hanging and shooting yourself in the face, both shit tier methods.

>>25704593
I thought you couldn't od on meth

>>25703621
Das funny

>>25704593
jesus, that must have been terrifying for the guy. how did it make you super strong and fast?

>>25704730

technically you can OD on everything but meth will give you a psychotic break waaay before you're even near dying

>>25704773
I dunno, i surpassed all my physical limits, my muscles worked as hard as they could. When i crashed, I could barely stand, every single one of my mzscles hurt

>>25704730
Why would it be impossible? I looke it up, lethal dose for me should me around 1,6 grams

>>25704773
It doesn't you just strain your muscles but since you are numb you can't feel them screaming in pain.