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HOWW do I get better at socializing? I'm...
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You are currently reading a thread in /r9k/ - ROBOT9001

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HOWW do I get better at socializing? I'm literally unable to be funny, joke around and that like NTs can

I mean, if I'm with 1 or 2 other people it's okay, but whenever we're 4 or more I'm mostly just sitting there being passive AAAAAAAA I'm not taking up any space
>>
You don't, just avoid situations where there are large amounts of people.

I'm sure someone in this thread will say something like "you just gotta get out there brah, practice makes perfect!" but that's fucking bullshit and you will only get hurt. You know your limits, stay within them or the normies will see you stepping out of line and just smack you back into your place.
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Just kind of act like its you and 1 or 2 other people in the room. It's trial amd error and a little more complex than 'just be yourself'. But the main thing here is to stop thinking so much and whatever funny thought that goes through your mind, say it.
Try watching some stand up comedy, that's the best example i can think of, and i mean literally watch tons of stand up comedy until it rubs off on you
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>>25695704
JBYS senpai desu

Good Luck
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>>25695783
>whatever funny thought that goes through your mind, say it.

When I do that people look at me like I shot the dog

My humor is non-normie compatible, I can only make my friends laugh.
>>
>tfw I'm the life of the party in groups but 1 on 1 I can't think of anything to say
what's wrong with mr
>>
It's all genetics dude
sorry to tell you
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>>25695739
See now that's just giving up and being a bitch. Maybe OP just wants to make a certain girl laugh.
There's nothing wrong with working on his social skills
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>>25695783
Well, that's the thing, I've grown up watching comedies and stand-up (though in English and I'm from Europe, I've had more success when I've traveled and talking with people in English (maybe because my English is better than the average European's so they don't really notice how retarded I actually am)) but I'm pretty much one of the most boring people you'll meet
my guess is that I self-doubt too much and afraid of failing so I don't even try
>>25695839
wouldn't surprise me, my parents are boring retards as well
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>>25695813
Well that's why i say it's trial and error, don't change your sense of humor to please others. If they don't understand you then forget them. Your friends are your friends for a reason. Good luck
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>>25695813
What kind of jokes are you making? is it edgelord /b/ shit? If it is, consider hanging out where edgelord /b/ tards would hang out, like anime clubs.
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>>25695877
a big thing would
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>>25695877
>my guess is that I self-doubt too much and afraid of failing so I don't even try

Being self aware is key, never doubt yourself friend. It's really all in your head, if our thoughts could come to life and punch us in the face we would never get anywhere in life.
Warp the self doubt into self assurance
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>>25695813
>My humor is non-normie compatible, I can only make my friends laugh.
OP here, usually it's the deliverance that's important, not the joke itself

I mean, most jokes normies tell each other aren't really that funny, but it's how they deliver them, the tone of their voice, the energy, body gestures and all that that makes people feel engaged in the conversation. And it's that what I feel like I'm lacking

this is pretty related
https://www.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/comments/40ekt6/til_most_lonely_people_dont_lack_social_skills/
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>>25695952
>Warp the self doubt into self assurance
how would you go about doing that?
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>>25696034
this part in particular I meant
>One cost, for the lonely If you want to be interesting, the one thing you shouldnt do is really focus on the fact that I want this person to like me. Thats going to make you very uninteresting. But the lonely, they just cant help but focus on that.
>Theres this beautiful study in which subjects speak into a microphone and they either think that someone else listening to them, or they think theyre just talking. Among the nonlonely, theres very little difference in how third parties would rate subjects responses. A third party rates subjects as equally interesting in both conditions. Yet lonely people become less interesting when they think someone is listening. It's sort of a choking effect. Thats one kind of scarcity trap.
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>>25696053
Ok go turn your shower on. But instead of warm water turn it to cold. Then jump in. Yea you might think its pointless and you might even be scared of the freezing water hitting your body, but if you just jump in and stop doubting yourself you will realize you didn't die. Yes it's uncomfortable at first but u might just like it.
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>>25696205
uh, yeah, that's not exactly the same but alright
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>>25696804
I think his point stands that you're holding onto your anxiety like a loser bitch and need some conquests under your belt before you can stop feeling that way.
Basically you need to train in public speaking.
Note that more people are afraid of public speaking than death.
The REASON why they are afraid(this is fucking important) is that they believe their words will seperate them from the group and deny them social connections forever.
So therefore all you need to do is understand what the fuck you are going to say.
Look at obama's speeches. I hate the guy but he gives great speeches.
One thing you'll notice is that silence is just as important, if not as important as the words.
Recently the Islraeli PM spent over a minute in a speech just standing there.
So don't worry about not saying shit. Just act like you're fucking flanders and you'll be fine. People remember EMOTION ONLY
See this EMOTION ONLY
no one cares what you actually say, its the emotion it produces. This is why yelling "nigger digger in mudslime trigger" would be you fired from walmart.
Because everyone is primed to respond that you're a shit for saying that.
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>>25697177

oke doke
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