>Tfw I just got $20,000 from mom's life insurance
I-I don't even know how to feel about this
On one hand, so much money, on the other g-God dammit I can't believe she's dead
God damn I just wanna use the money to buy a plane and fly right into a mountain
Buy a little memorial for her, then invest the rest of the money and use it to secure a good future. Probably what she would want unless she was a shit mom, and you sound sad about her dying so I can assume that she wasn't.
start a life. if NEET apply for financial aid and go to a cheap state school or start a business, if you have a job take a trip or a buy some stock or get a better car. pay your debts. do something good with it, don't squander an opportunity.
Just make sure the money is somewhere safe for now and don't worry about it. Sounds like you're hip deep in grieving and not about making life choices atm. That's fine and normal. Take a while to process. This is a pass to cry as much you want, btw.
>tfw poor, stupid mother who has made absolutely retarded personal and financial decisions her whole life
>tfw kind of looking forward to her dying so she can stop laying her financial burdens upon me and my sisters
Sorry for your loss, but it's time to get your shit together.
20k will last you for less than 2-3 years.
After that you'll die on the streets. Don't get to that point.
Use that money to fix your life.
You can use them alongside a part time job to get yourself through community college.
Start buying healthy food, a gym membership, a car (if you're american and don't have one already). Also buy visits to a shrink and a hooker if you're virgin.
Go out and visit clubs based on your interests, make a couple of friends.
Then get a part time job and figure out what you'll do with your life. Go to college or learn a trade.
You have an opportunity to fix your life the easy way. Don't waste it if want to get better.